Disclaimer: Ioomoc

Nanakiyoda: I was inspired by Hakama Dake. That fanfic rocks. So, I decided to let my creation juices flow (Remember when I wrote Resident Kenshin? Yeah...same thing) So here goes...

Songs to listened to while writing this...

Minerva by Deftones

Change by Deftones

My Own Summer by Deftones

Digital Bath by Deftones

Teenager by Deftones

Blue Monday by Orgy

Breathe by Prodigy

Fire Starter by Prodigy

#1 Crush by Garbage

Into the Void by NiN

Sin by NIN

A Warm Place by NiN

Such Great Heights by The Postal Service

Obviously in Kaoru's POV

Standing on the edge of the cliff, I held my arms out and felt the gentle drafts of the thermals rush past me. It was the greatest feeling in the world that I was expirencing. It wasn't peace, love, hatred, or anything. It was infinate. I was infinate. As I stood there, I truely smiled. No thoughts ran through my mind, no feelings corrupted me, no nothing. Just me, the gentle thermals and the sunshine. I looked down at the cliff's drop, and noticed there was ground to be reached. It was a long drop. I wonder if I could just fall into that gentle abyss that is nothingness...would the sky take me? Would it sweep me up and carry me away into neverending dreams? I sighed and steped back away. It was rediculous to think that. All that would happen would be me splattering myself all over the ground below. Sometimes I wished I could just fly away from everything. The breeze swayed my Hakama and Gi, which loosely against my body. The Gi had long since been pulled free of my Hakama, and now swayed with the wind like a jacket. They'll be worried about me. Kenshin and the rest were probably still looking for me. I had left them abrubtly.

(Earlier)

Standing at the gates, I eagerly awaited Kenshin's return from the market. I'll do it today. No more waiting, no more torture. I straightened my training Gi again for the umpteenth time. I'm going to tell him how I feel. I'm going to say those words. I sighed. Then, everything went to hell. Kenshin was running towards the dojo.

"Miss Kaoru! Run!" He yelled out. I saw what was the matter. Two guys were chasing after him. Their Ki levels were higher than Kenshin's. I recognized the one. Brown jagged hair, blue eyes, and scar running along his right arm...that Tashidama! He was one of father students. I gripped my Bokken tightly. I will not allow anyone to hurt my Kenshin. No one. I ran up and quickly excuted a perfect horizontal slash followed up with two jabs and one vetical slash along the other guys body. He fell to the ground. Tashidama laughed and leaped into the sky. Sprouting wings, He flew above me and tried to slash at me with his sword. I easily dodged him and smiled. Wings sprouted from my back, big beautiful angelic wings.

"You bitch." Tashidama spat at me. I smiled and leaped into the air, taking flight after him. Then, I flew as high as I could go, and folded my wings in, plummeting to the ground towards Tashidama. Putting as much pressure down on my thumbs as I could, I slammed the bokken through Tashidama's skull. He disappeared and I landed on my feet on the ground with a heavy thud. My bokken and wings disappeared. Kenshin stood up and walked up to me. I touched his face gently, smiling as I said those words I had been trying to say for so long.

"Kenshin...I would die for you, to feel your arms wrapped around me, to cry away all your pain. I would twist the knife and bleed my aching heart...just for you." I said, and pressed my lips against his, showing him my passion. He returned it. Time stood still. Birds were frozen in the air, leaves stuck to the ground.

(Present)

It was just a dream though. It was another dream I had suffered. Suffered because I want it to become true but refuse to make it true. There was no denying it. Kenshin had a grip on me. I couldn't do anything to save myself from his grasp. I can't let it happen though. It would change everything I have ever worked for. A hawk soared above me, waiting for me to make my jump. Those dreams...of him. They are nothing but torture. Almost every night, I confessed to him. Almost every morning, I'd wake up to find it was just a dream. Reality and dreams keep blending together on me. I'd always wake up in the morning and fight myself on whether or not it had happened. My tight grips on my pillow would always remind me that he wasn't beside me. So, I reasoned that it hadn't happened. Still...all these dreams...I'm so lost and confused...

"You gave me reason, you gave me control...I gave you my purity and my purity you stole. Did you think I wouldn't recognize this comprimise? Am I just too stupid to realize? Lies!" I yelled out. Is this what I deserve! What have I done wrong! I bent down and picked up a rock, then chucked it angrily up at the sky. I can't tell him because I don't want to risk losing what we have...I don't want to lose my best friend! I sighed and walked back to the edge of the cliff. Everything I've ever worked for...keeping my innocence...training so hard to defend myself...trying to make everyone smile in bad times...ignoring my own emotions...It was taking it toll. I couldn't sleep anymore. I couldn't eat anymore. I had given my life to so many. Yet no return...no one...He didn't know it, but for the past few weeks...no...months...I had been borrowing energy from him. I've been depending on him to give me rest. He's been my comfort...my solice. The bottom of the cliff felt so inviting...so reassuring.

(Earlier)

I walked to the kitchen, my hand pressing against the wall for strength. I had made it to the kitchen. Kenshin was standing there. It felt so real...I lifted my hand to my lips. It wasn't. Kenshin turned around and smiled at me.

"Good morning Miss Kaoru." He said, smiling. I looked up and smiled. He can't see me as weak...I straightened up and sat at the table.

"Would you mind making me some food Kenshin...I'm afraid I haven't been getting much sleep." I asked him. He nodded and gave me a plate.

"I already made some for you Miss Kaoru." He said and walked out, undoubtably to start laundry. Thanks Kenshin. Yahiko walked in.

"No sleep again? Come on ugly! What the hell is keeping you up?" He said, slightly getting on my nerves. I gritted my teeth at him.

"Yahiko...could you at least go one day without calling me that?" I hissed at him. His face had worry etched across it.

"Well...just answer the darn question!" He said.

"What question?' I asked, not out of stupidity, but the willingness to avoid the subject. Yahiko slammed his fist on the table and walked out of the room. I finished eating and stood up. I walked outside. Kenshin looked up at me and walked over to me. No doubt Yahiko told him.

"Miss Kaoru, are you okay?" He asked, hints of amber aligning his voilet eyes.

"I'm fine. I just need a little fresh air. I'll be back." I said sweetly, covering up my intentions. Kenshin opened his mouth to speak, but didn't say anything, just closed his mouth and smiled.

(Present)

I had walked away from the dojo, from Kenshin, with no intention of turning back. Instead, I allowed my feet to carry me here. I'm becoming empty shell now...because I couldn't tell him...I've said it so many times...but he never heard it. I could no longer use him as a drug to keep existing. I had to end it. I love him. The words echoed in my mind for so long. The sun was just beginning to set. I need a warm place. I fell to my knees, just a centimeter from the edge. He's my warm place. I dropped my arms to my sides. I need him. All strength was leaving my body. It's not even his fault.

"How does it feel to treat me like you do? How should I feel?" I whispered. I heard a voice echoing from beyond, beconing for me. Is it real or not? I had long since given up on the difference.

"Miss Kaoru!" The voice echoed. He's here. My eyelids drooped and darkness blanketed me. Warmth drifted from my body. I felt myself being lifted up by surprisingly strong arms. Arms I had been in so many times and had never been in.

"I'm finally free...Kenshin..." I muttered. The arms cluthed me tighter.

"Miss Kaoru...please..." He muttered.

"I'm fine Kenshin...I just needed to be here." I said, the words not even being forced.

"Here?" He asked.

"In your arms...I've been dying for this." I said, and opened my eyes, seeing him. His faced was etched with confusion and worry. Everything is perfect.

"Oro?" He asked.

"I...nevermind. Just promise me you'll never leave." I asked. He nodded, tears brimmming his eyes. I don't even have to say those words.

"I promise." He said.

"Kenshin...let me tell you a secret. I thought that if I couldn't share this with you, I'd share you with the world. Place your hand on your heart...you feel that? Cause it's real. If I had my chance with three little words...I'd say...are you okay." I said to him, expressing everything. I no longer cared about what was real or not. As long as I had him for the moment, no matter how short of a moment, I needed nothing else.

OWARI

Nanakiyoda: Wha-o...that was way out of my genre...but who cares? AS long as it was good, ne? Give me some reviews on this one. Can't decide whether this one will be a one-shot or not. Do look at my other creations too. After all, Genius does need its critics...ne? Until the next fanfic piece, Ja ne cause Sayonara is far too long.