Title: Felis Domesticatus vs Canis Lupus

Alternate title: Of Cats and Dogs

Rating: T (for swearing and lewd comments, cattishness)

Authoress: Rena Kaerutsukai

Summary: The cursed Defense Against the Dark Arts position has been refilled again, this time by a young woman. She does something that no other holder of this position has done, though: goes to the only available previous DADA professor for advice. That ex-professor is Remus John Lupin, who thinks that the new professor is a bit off her rocker. But they may just have more in common than he thinks. (implied SBRL)

Chapter 3: What Are You Doing Here Aziraphale?

Felicia looked around her house, at the shelves of books that she had to leave behind. In the end, she had only packed her many Defense texts and a few books for the purpose of enjoyable reading. Good Omens was one of them. It still remained one of her favorite books, second only to Les Miserables, which, due to its hefty size, had had to be left behind.

She felt in her pocket to be sure that her minimized suitcases were in there, and looked around for anything she'd forgotten. She walked over to the fire, taking a pinch of the green floo powder from the ceramic urn that looked like it should have held the remains of a deceased ancestor. Ducking into her fireplace, she stood upright, her head in the chimney. One final thing to check: she felt in the special holster at her side for her wand. Yes, the ivy wood and centaur hair wand was there. She gave a sigh of relief.

"The Leaky Cauldron, London!" She yelled clearly, throwing the powder down. She disappeared in a flash of green, leaving her little house behind.

Remus Lupin sat at a table in the Leaky Cauldron, sipping a drink in between pages of Good Omens. He had forgotten just how engrossing this book was. He only looked up when someone entered the Leaky Cauldron, either by the door or by floo. He had a feeling that none of the people he was seeing were the young woman he was supposed to pick up. For one, none of them were American, and that seemed a huge giveaway. He looked up at the arrival of yet another person by floo, a young white-haired woman who shook soot out of her hair as she emerged from the fireplace. She walked over to the bar and ordered a butterbeer. Of course, she didn't speak loudly enough so that Lupin could pick up on her accent, but he deduced what she'd ordered by the butterbeer that was handed to her. She paid for her drink, and walked across the room to the table opposite Remus'. He went back to his book, his intelligent hazel eyes flicking up over the top of his book every now and then to watch the young woman. Something wasn't right about her.

After tumbling out of the fireplace, Felicia walked to the bar to order a butterbeer and wait for her escort. There was a man sitting alone at a table, his nose buried in a book, his tawny hair hiding his eyes from view. Part of Felicia wanted to go sit near him, but the overwhelming scent of dog drove her to the other side of the room. She pulled her copy of Good Omens out of her backpack and started reading, giggling slightly at the paintball scene with Aziraphale and Crowley. Occasionally she'd look over at the man across the quaint tavern. Once, his hands moved off of the cover of his book. Felicia's eyes widened as she saw the UK cover of the exact same book that she was reading. She smiled, and decided to go over and talk to him. But first, a bit of a clothes change. She transfigured her clothes black, just like Crowley's. She walked across the room to the bookish man.

"Hey Az'raphale, what are you doing in a place like this?" She asked with a friendly smile, using her own unique pronunciation of the angel's name. The man turned warm hazel eyes up to her, an expression of confusion on his face.

"I'm sorry, you must be..." He seemed to understand, and smiled. "Good day, dear." He said pleasantly. Remus noticed her American accent, and wondered if this was the new Defense professor at Hogwarts.

"Mind if I sit down?" She asked.

"Not at all." He said. "If I may be so bold as to ask your name, miss?"

"Mayfair. Felicia Mayfair." Felicia said sweetly.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Miss Mayfair. My name is Remus Lupin." Remus said with a charming smile. Felicia decided that no man could be this nice without being "gayer than a tree full of monkeys on nitrous oxide", so to speak, or taken. Or both.

"Pleasure's all mine, Remus. So, who are you waiting for?" Felicia asked. "No one who'll get too jealous of me sitting here, I hope." She added with a grin and a wink.

"I'm waiting for a colleague." Remus said.

"Really? That's cool." Felicia said.

"And you? There must be a reason that a lovely young woman such as you would floo all the way to England." A light blush rose to Felicia's cheeks. Wow, this Remus was a real charmer, wasn't he? Too bad he reeked of dog, or Felicia might be interested.

"I'm the new DADA professor at a local wizarding school...Hogwarts, I think it's called. I'm waiting for the person who's going to kinda show me the ropes." She said. Remus stood up and extended his hand to her.

"Then, my dear Felicia, it will be my pleasure to introduce you to the details of your new position." Felicia's brow furrowed, then the right side quirked up. She expected a much older man, like with white hair, meaner and more...professor-ly...maybe with a primly pressed set of robes and a tie...or something...oh hell, Felicia didn't even know what she'd been expecting. But certainly not this young, albeit careworn, friendly-looking man (she could tell that he was young, even through the premature grey in his tawny hair and the sickly complexion) in shabby (though that was probably through no fault of his own) robes, who looked barely out of school himself.

"But...I mean, I was told that the man I'd be meeting was experienced in the subject, and was an old professor." Remus gave a slight sigh, though he could hear in her voice that she didn't mean any offense by it.

"I assure you, I was well-qualified to teach the subject when I was professor two years ago, and I still am." He said, not meaning to sound quite as terse as he did. The overall effect was still friendly, or at least not unfriendly.

"Then why aren't you? Still professor, I mean." Felicia asked curiously.

"There were...insurmountable complications and I was forced to resign." Remus said.

"Oh...I'm sorry to hear that. I thank you for taking the time to teach me the tricks of the trade." Felicia said, hiding her nervousness quite well. Insurmountable complications? Oh God, what if he was some sort of a serial killer? Or what if it had something to do with that dog smell? What if he turned young women into dogs just to cook them up, eat them, and sell the skin to Japanese shamisen makers?(1) No, he didn't look capable of doing that. But looks could be deceiving, couldn't they? It was all Felicia could do to keep a shiver from running down her spine.

"Well then, shall we go for a walk? Perhaps to feed the ducks, hm?" Remus said with an amused smile. Felicia stood, slinging her backpack over her shoulder, and took his hand.

"Sure, let's go feed the ducks." She grinned.

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(1) A shamisen is a type of Japanese musical instrument. They really are made out of dogskin.