DUALITY

CHAPTER I

In the place where the sky should have been, there was only darkness. A gagging scent hung in the air, of burning flesh and smoldering steel. The ground was covered with fragments of metal and other sorts of flaming wreckage; anything that had once been apart of the humble scrap that served as the foundation of the Sector 7 slums.

She stood there, amongst the flaming wreckage, her combat rifle slung across her back. The fierce neon glow of Mako from the nearby reactor was captured in her emerald eyes, even beneath the darkened visor of her helmet. Her gaze had long ago become transfixed upon the remains of the Sector 7 gate, and the molten wreckage wedged within it. It was folly, she knew, but she had spent the last few moments struggling to assure herself that it was all a bad dream. The destruction, the loss, the death count. She wanted to convince herself they were all elements of a nightmare, one that would flee like a shadow when the sun rose.

But somewhere, far above, the midday sun was gleaming, and all the while, reality basked in its glory directly before her eyes.

As the survivors passed her, she did not miss the icy glare of indifference glazed over their eyes, nor the paralyzing stares of hatred they cast in her general direction. She smirked at the irony. The people that filtered past her, from their matted hair, to their singed clothing, to their tired features-she knew them all. She saw them everyday. The woman that passed her now, scowling horribly at her from the corner of her eye-she had just sold her a flower yesterday, asked how her son was doing the day before that.

Aeris Gainsborough felt trapped. She could not take off her helmet, and regard them with her bare face, for they would recognize her. She could not speak, in fear these people would acknowledge her voice. Inside her helmet, she felt like a child locked in a closet, screaming her head off to get out of the darkness. But that closet no longer had a door; it had vanished long ago when she had agreed to live two lives.

Aeris stood there, still as a statue. She firmly decided that she would not move until the commander called the troops to a dismissal. Anxiety plagued her, feeding on what little energy three hours of sleep had granted her the previous night. She wanted to leave. She had a nagging feeling that these people had the ability to see right through her helmet. They were glaring at her because they knew her secret. The fact that she was from Shinra had nothing to do with it. They hated her because she had turned on them.

No, she responded to her fears. They don't recognize me. They can't, I look like a man...like everyone else...

And indeed she did. Though her restless mind would not allow the belief, it was true that to all the passer-by, she was just another figure, clad in the well-known blue armor of SOLDIER. It was impossible to identify her as a woman, in the shapeless uniform. It broadened her shoulders and made her look all the more like a man.

"Aeris!"

A man's harsh voice broke through the air, which was filled with chatter and quiet sobbing. Aeris straightened immediately upon recognizing the tone, as if she were suddenly being awakened from a deep slumber. One thought leapt into the helm of her mind: not to let him see her like this.

She turned to face him as he approached. Aeris surprised herself by laughing when he tapped on her tinted face shield with his gloved fingers. "That is you in there, right?" he asked.

She crossed her arms over her chest, her wide grin suppressed from the man's vision. She felt guilty for smiling, felt it was a crime. "Maybe it is," she said mockingly, "And maybe it isn't."

Aeris stared up at him. He was good few inches taller than her. He held his helmet loosely in his left hand, and the radiant golden hair that the helm had concealed was now flattened against his pale forehead in a mess of sweat. Mako blue eyes beneath raised blonde eyebrows peered at her amusedly.

The SOLDIER shrugged, maintaining his smug pose as his voice hardened in a teasing seriousness. "Well, let me know when you decide. I was told to tell you when we're free to go, but if you want to stay, I guess I can live with that." He looked around him, at the rubble, at the untouched scrap metal lining the narrow path that led away to the infamous Wall Market. "You live around here, right? Should be fine." He turned to go.

She rolled her eyes. "Cloud Strife, sarcasm simply isn't you. It doesn't work. You're a terrible liar."

"Ah. Well, Aeris Gainsborough," Cloud Strife said, turning and cracking a smile, "I can't say you're much better."

She stepped back, acting surprised. "What do you mean?" she asked him, tipping her head sideways.

Cloud sighed, running his hand through his hair. "I...don't know what I mean. If I get started talking about it, all you'll do is deny everything, so I guess its not worth it..."

Aeris laughed. "Yes. You're right about that."

It was amazing how fast her mood had changed. But she realized the reality of her living terror had only been contained in the back of her mind. Sorrow and stress were emotions only waiting to be unleashed again, but they would not attack her now. Not when Cloud was here.

They faced each other, the brief moment of humor extinguished. In an effort to bring the lightheartedness back into existence, Aeris reached up to his face, her groan of disgust stifled by her helmet, but still entirely legible. Her fingers began shoving the strands of hair away from his face, but he caught her hand and shoved it away as he began ruffling through the tresses himself, tucking the loose locks behind his ears in a disheveled and careless manner.

After a moment, Cloud stood before her, holding his arms out and expecting praise. Aeris shook her head at him, smiling. "What's this about leaving? This better not have been urgent..."

"Don't worry," he assured her. "It wasn't. With the train station wiped out thanks to the plate coming down, we have to take the trucks to the upper level. I hate those trucks, I mean, the train is one thing, at least you can move around, but they cram us so tight in there...and Raleigh says it'll be another half hour until we leave here."

Aeris rolled her eyes, silently loathing the Shinra Commander as her gaze fell upon him, gathered amongst the other SOLDIERs in the distance. "We have to stick around longer? What on the Planet for, I wonder?"

"Oh, you know. The usual. Stick around to make sure everything's safe, give the people a feeling of security. But, there's not much we can do. Anyone whose got the brains to collapse the plate and get out alive has got to be well hidden by now." Cloud held out his fingers, bending one back into his palm. "So extermination of the enemy is certainly out of the question, and if its not, we're in the wrong place..." Cloud stared at Aeris. "Y'know, they're saying its AVALANCHE."

Aeris brought her hand up to her face in surprise, but the helmet she still wore defeated the purpose of the gesture. "No. Not again. Who is saying that?"

"Shinra, who else?"

"You don't believe them, do you?"

Cloud shook his head. "Of course not, I never do. But that doesn't mean they can't be right this time." He looked at her, his gaze intent. "Why don't you take off your helmet? Isn't it hot in that thing?"

Aeris sighed. Sweat had gathered so thickly on her brow that it had begun to drip into her eyes. She looked around her. All the survivors had passed through, now probably seeking shelter from other sectors. Deciding it was safe for the moment, and with an effort, she pulled the helmet from her head, careful not to snag the long, chestnut hair in the straps as it spilled from the helm. Emerald eyes, carved into a pale and beautiful face, burned brightly with a youthful glow that hadn't abandoned her as she had departed from her teenage years. She brushed her hair out of her eyes, taking a ribbon from a pocket in her uniform. She gathered the tresses together, twisted them in a loose but secure braid, and tossed the spiral over her shoulder. She was shaking her head while staring at the ground. "We shouldn't be taking off our gear until we get back to Headquarters. Its regulation."

At that, Cloud bowed his head, snorting at the sound of the word "regulation". He lowered his voice to a murmur. The wreckage around him, lined with fire, was captured in his sapphire eyes as they rose and looked above him. "Regulation. I've never gotten anywhere with regulation. All these years, and I'm still a foot soldier. I guess its my destiny."

"Don't say things like that," Aeris prompted, her soft voice full of pity. "You'll get your chance."

He looked at her, eyes full of gratitude, his face entirely serious, even for a moment. But then his familiar, cocky smile returned, and he dismissed her with a wave of his hand. "Nah. It doesn't matter." He peered over his shoulder at the mass of SOLDIERs, now moving at a leisurely pace through the remains of a children's playground.

Aeris followed his gaze, grabbing him by the arm and dragging him along after her. "Come on, we'd better go."

She passed the playground equipment, memories flowing into her mind as she began to see herself, as a child, sitting on one of the rusty swings. She had been all alone, in those tender years of youth. Every day, she had left her house, taking her own private paths through the junk heaps until she reached the park. It had been there for so long, it was considered ancient. Her mother had said once that it had been there before the plate had been built, and when each sector still had its own name, and was only a village. She would sit on the old swing for hours, staring at the gate, waiting for other children to perhaps clamber onto the equipment with her, but none came. It was a forgotten part of the city, and to Aeris, it would always be her special place.

Cloud caught her intense gaze, and attempted to pull her out of her trance with a snap of his fingers. She jerked, then, and as he laughed at her sudden movement, she shoved him aside. Then her face was stricken with horror. "What time is it?" she demanded, suddenly stopping in her tracks.

Cloud took the moment to roll up the material on his sleeve and examine his watch. "About a quarter past five. Why?"

Her eyes were wide with horror. "I've got to go."

"What? You can't go!" Cloud said, narrowing his eyes at her. "Not again! When we go back for roll call, and you're not there...Raleigh'll go insane!"

"Can't you cover for me?"

Cloud bit his lower lip, and scrunched his face. "I don't know, he'd suspect me, maybe fire me..."

"He won't do that," Aeris assured him. "You're too good of a fighter. But, please Cloud, I'll do anything!" she said, anxious enough almost to the point of jumping up and down. Time had run out completely. She would be in for it now.

Cloud raised an eyebrow. "Anything? Like what?" he offered, grinning.

Aeris thought for a moment. "Ah, I know. How about a date? You cover for me, I'll give you that date you've always wanted. I know you liked that girl back in your hometown, though..."

Cloud shook his head at her, the moment suddenly serious. "No. Forget about that. Hmm. All right. Deal. One date."

Aeris grinned. "Great! Here," she said, shoving her gun at him. "Put it back for me, will you? I'll see you later!" she dashed away, shoving the helmet back on her face.

Cloud waved at her. "I won't forget! Don't think I will!" He called to her as she disappeared through the outer gate, leading to Sector 5.

He chuckled to himself. A date. He expected something had been brewing between himself and Aeris, but he sure hadn't expected her to be the one to call the shots. She was always so quiet, so cautious. The aspect that she had made the offer out of desperation nagged at him, along with fact that she owed him something, and if they went somewhere together, it would only be because Aeris was fulfilling her debt. There was no concrete evidence that what he wanted truly did exist. But why had she fired that out, instead of just begging him until he agreed to it like she usually did?

But he knew the reason. It had been because just last night, he had been talking about...

Her.

The girl he had loved, and, for a long time, she was the only girl he thought he could ever love. But now...

He had left his small town of Nibelheim behind, left all the people there behind, including her. It was a lost dream, now. Something eaten away at and covered up by the passage of time. It was in the past. Nibelheim, his life there, everything about it, was in the past. And there was no use living in the past.

He stood alone in the park, now. All other SOLDIERs had gone. If he didn't hurry, he would be late, and the trucks would leave without him. As he was about to break into a sprint, a woman's voice, all too familiar, called to him.

"Cloud? Cloud! It can't be..."

The voice struck him with recognition, but it was aged. The voice he remembered had been fixed with all the tones of a child, permanently seared into his head, but there was no doubt that it was the same voice. And at the same time he knew it couldn't be true. It was impossible. He froze in place, fearing to turn around, afraid of what couldn't possibly exist.

But he turned, slowly, too stunned and paralyzed by curiosity to deny himself a simple glance.

His heart caught in his throat.

Its her.

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Aeris rushed through the filthy streets, out of breath but completely aware of the consequences if she were to lighten her pace. She was an hour late. She despised lying, it was a horrible sickness that had no cure, no matter the amount of dirt that was swept under the rug. Instead, she struggled to invent a reason for her lateness.

She felt a warm breeze blow in from the swamps that lay just outside the sector. The buzzing of flickering neon signs filled her ears as she passed the numerous merchant shops that lined the way to her home. The townspeople had all gathered outside of their deteriorating houses, and were huddled in front of the huge television screen a few local electricians had rigged in the center of the tiny village. The news anchor on the screen was buried in paper work concerning the destruction of Sector 7.

"According to the honorable President Shinra, the terrorist group AVALANCHE is to blame for this tragic incident," drawled the reporter. "Fortunately, the loss of life is said to be minimal, as many citizens managed to reach safety before the pillar collapsed..."

Excited murmurs and worried expressions filled the small crowd around the television. Their attention was focused on the anchor. Aeris used the opportunity to sneak by. She dashed through the area, into the cavern at the far end, near a rusty metal shack.

It was, as far as she knew, the only true house in the slums. It was two stories tall, and the paint around the door frame was chipping, but it was very clean and surrounded by flowers. No one, not even Aeris herself, could explain how or why the flowers grew around the house. But she was grateful to them. They were a useful alibi.

Carefully, she made her way behind the house, into a small wooden shed she used to keep her gardening tools in. Thankfully, there were no windows on this side of the house. Her mother never knew about her little metamorphosis that she always conducted before she came home. She began to shed herself of the heavy SOLDIER uniform, stuffing the contents in a plastic bin in the corner. She took a long pink dress from a peg on the wall, stepping into it and hastily fastening the buttons. Following this, she placed a short red jacket over it, shoving the heavy metal materia bracelets that clung to her wrists through the narrow sleeves. A pair of old, brown gardening boots sat in the corner. As they were several sizes too big for her, she slipped into them easily. At last, she took up the flower basket she had filled with fresh flowers this morning and hung it on her arm.

Aeris took a deep breath before leaving the shed and going to the front door of her house. She turned the knob, kicking the dirt off her boots as she did so.

"Mom?" she called, sticking her head in the doorway. The flower-filled house smelt rich with the pleasing scent of fresh bread, and she closed her eyes to enhance the scent as she inhaled it.

Footsteps sounded on the stairs, and Elmyra Gainsborough came running to the door. "My Goodness! Aeris!" she exclaimed. "Come in, come in! I was so worried!"

"Mom, I'm okay...I'm only-"

The small woman crossed her arms across her chest, scowling. "An hour late."

Aeris bowed her head. "Yeah, I know. I'm sorry."

Elmyra was a middle-aged woman, with a face softened by age and many years of immense loss. Many of the wives in Sector 5 had insisted that she had lived her life in the country, and the wrinkles on her face were from smiling so much. Elmyra would shake her head at the statement. She did smile a great deal, and her face was well indented, but most of the crevices on her face had in fact come from the harshness of city life. And the time when she had received the news that her husband had died. Aeris had sworn that she had aged ten years upon hearing the news. The news that had, unexplainably, been delivered by Aeris herself.

"What made you so late?" Elmyra asked, raising an eyebrow and dusting her hands on her white apron.

Aeris bit her lip. "Uh..."

"Oh, you know what, I bet it was the incident with Sector 7."

Aeris rapidly nodded her head, thanking fortune that she had a legible excuse this time. It kept her under wraps for just a little bit longer. "Yes, that's it exactly."

"You didn't...see anything gruesome, I hope."

"No. I tried to avoid it, but it was on the way home...I had to pass the gate. I saw it. It was...really bad." Those feelings of sadness came back to her. It scared her, how close the incident had been to her own home. If that AVALANCHE group decided to strike again...

Elmyra was already busying herself around the kitchen. Aeris set her basket of flowers on the table, and sat down, folding her hands in her lap. "You know, Mom, you should really consider moving up onto the plate."

"Oh, we can't do that dear. I can't afford it."

"But, Mom..."

Her mother walked over to her, taking one of Aeris's hands and clasping it in both of hers. "Aeris, we can't. We've...been really lucky these past twenty two years. And I'm beginning to think, well, actually, I have been thinking, that this is really the safest place for you. They'll never find you here."

Aeris placed her head in her hands, groaning. "I know...I'm different...but why can they possibly want me?"

Elmyra looked at her bemusedly. "Are you asking me, or yourself?"

"Neither, I guess."

"We've been through this a million times throughout the years. You know there's something special about you, right?"

Aeris nodded. Her mind flowed back to the first time she could remember having this discussion with her mother, long ago...

"What is special about you, Aeris?"

"I...hear voices in my head."

"Yes, and what else?"

"I...hear these horrible cries whenever I'm around a Mako reactor..."

"Now, my dear, if these things get out, and you're found by the wrong people, don't you worry about what could happen?"

"...Yes."

As she had aged, her persistence rotted away and her patience grew, so she had accepted the situation. She had stayed in the slums, hiding, keeping a low profile. After a time, she began to scare herself. She heard voices, belonging to people she had never even known...and when they spoke to her, she could visualize their words, and see their events. She received a distinct feeling that they were true. That was how the announcement of the death of her father had come about. She had felt it, the moment he died, like a disruption in the stream of reality. Aeris had even heard his voice, cry out...

"Elmyra...I love you..."

And there had been the shrill screams that had awoken her in the middle of the night. She did not know what was making them, or even if they were real.

But she had accepted it, accepted it all, no matter its oddity. It was a weird situation, she would give it that. And it was the strict refusal to face and decipher it, that granted her the ability to live with the fact that she knew virtually nothing, but only to struggle to blend in with everyone else. Not that it wasn't a pursued task. She had tried it her entire life.

Back in the present, Aeris stared at her mother. "If...I'm like this, than were you and Dad...?"

Elmyra shook her head. "No, dear. Neither of us were like you...I'm afraid."

"I...see."

Elmyra drooped a comforting arm over her daughter's shoulder. "So, how many flowers did you sell today?"