Chapter 2: Wherein Dialogues of Minute Importance Are Found

"Ranma, just what did Kuno say to you?" Nabiki asked gently as she rubbed a pleasant smelling healing salve (courtesy of Dr. Tofu) onto Ranma's bruises.

"Pfft! It was nothing." Ranma said stoically. He sat with his legs crossed and his face blank, carefully filtering out all emotion from his tone. He knew better than to tell Nabiki anything that made her willing to be nice and gentle.

Nabiki smiled and said nothing – she wasn't going to press Ranma to spill the beans…yet. Instead, the two of them sat in silence in what the western world would classify as the family dinning and living room, as Nabiki tended to Ranma's wounds (Dr. Tofu couldn't be trusted to visit with Kasumi loitering about). The one sound that could be heard was the tranquil drip-drop of rain outside. For a brief moment, Ranma actually thought he could get away from spilling his humiliation.

But Nabiki, sly and cunning as a fox, was determined to take advantage of the boy to the fullest and picked up the task of worming at Ranma's secret conversation with Kuno, "Well, he obvious said something, or else we wouldn't have heard you scream."

Ranma squirmed slightly, of all the people at the Tendo Dojo, just why did it have to be Nabiki! Akane and Kasumi were already asleep, Mr. Tendo was not to be bothered right now, and Pop was out mauling children and stealing food. Sighing, Ranma began, "Kuno…"

Nabiki chimed in, interrupting Ranma, "Yeah, Kuno! What did he do? Did he put a finger or two in your…" she looked knowingly at Ranma, "special places?" Then, taking Ranma's flustered look and obvious discomfort for agreement, she continued quite cheerfully, "Oh he did! Wow! Good thing it wasn't me…"

"No!" Ranma cried out while flailing his arms, then, realizing he had told himself earlier to "play it cool," sat back down and said calmly, "No, Kuno couldn't lay a hand on me, not with my speed and skills!"

Nabiki smirked and rather teasingly said, "Did it feel good?"

Ranma's face was blank, then he bleached as he realize what Nabiki was hinting, "Eww! Nabiki! If Kuno even so much as tried…that…I'd beat him down!"

"Aww…" Nabiki cocked her head and cooed at Ranma, conveniently ignoring the twitching fury building in Ranma recognized by the little #-like symbol on his forehead, "but you looked so cute clinging to a man like that!"

"Nabiki..." Ranma mouthed out, his face burning with a scarlet blush, annoyance flowed from him like lava down a volcano.

Nabiki ignored him and giggled most girlishly, "So cute, I just had to take a picture!" She pulled a pictured out of the pocket of her sleeping robe and admired it with softening eyes, "You guys are so cute together in this picture, especially with your arms around him like that Ranma! Did he kiss you?"

Ranma's eyes widened in irritation. I never put my arms around Kuno… With lightning speed, Ranma snatched the picture out of Nabiki's hands despite a look of annoyance from Nabiki. Ranma cried out exasperatedly, "Nabiki you idiot! I was trying to push him away from me here! Jeez, keep me out of your fantasies."

Nabiki furrowed her brow at the name-calling, but remained unconvinced, "Oh yeah? Then why is that expression on your face?" Pointing at Ranma's face in the picture, she said, "See, you looked ready to be give yourself to him."

"Nabiki, you…" Ranma's words trailed off as he stared harder at his own picture. In the picture, rainwater had drenched the female Ranma leaving her blouse clinging tightly against her skin – especially around her breast. There was one little opening in the blouse where a button was missing, which flashed a little hint of cleavage that could make any man drool in lust – even Ranma himself found herself quite attractive (oh if only she wasn't me!). But then the horrific realization dawned on Ranma. Unbidden, a horrifying image of Happosai and a box of tissues appeared in his mind; swallowing nervously, Ranma said, "Nabiki…You wouldn't happen to be selling these pictures…?"

Nabiki eyed him suspiciously, but shrugged and said, "Yeah…But these pictures will fetch more than the previous ones." Then, she patted Ranma on the chest, "it's a good thing your girl body has such great boobs! If only you would agree to dress up as Sailor Moon, I'd be the richest woman in the world!"

"Look Nabiki, no matter how much you wish, I am not your sex slave, so stop taking pictures of me!" Ranma looked at Nabiki intently, his hair handsomely billowing in the night wind, his broad chest and muscular body making girls everywhere swoon in desire.

Nabiki resisted swooning, "You can't stop me from doing good business! But," she reached into her robe pocket and pulled out a small cylindrical case, "you can prevent these pictures from reaching the masses for a cheap thir…fourteen hundred yen (approximately $10)!"

Ranma was about to reach for his wallet when two things hit him, first, he didn't even have a wallet because he was and his father were notoriously poor, and second, "those are my pictures!" Ranma called out as he lunged forward.

Nabiki, who was prepared for such an attack, dexterously dropped the case into the sleeve of her robe where it rolled about in the folds of satin and cotton until it was settle somewhere against her chest. She looked at Ranma with a smug smirk of victory on her face, which quickly turned to worry as she notice the look of grim determination on Ranma's features, "Uh…Ranma…What…what are you going to do…"

"Whatever it takes to get that negative!"

The sound of and fury of voices woke Akane from her unicorn filled dream. Startled, an image of an evil burglar, big gruff and mean appeared in her mind. Sitting up from bed, Akane robed and readied herself, grabbing the nearby mallet (which just happened to be nearby), she headed out her room prepared to clobber the robber (groan).

Outside, Akane was joined by her father and Kasumi – Genma wasn't home yet – who nodded to her in acknowledgement. This wasn't the first time they've been robbed. Creeping down the stairs, they began to hear voices, which sounded strangely like Ranma and Nabiki.

"Give it to me Nabiki! I need it badly!" The Ranma-ian voice said rather harshly.

"No Ranma! You can't…" Akane assumed this to be Nabiki.

"And how are you going to stop me? Huh!" Ranma's voice taunted.

"I'll tell Daddy," Akane's gasped – Nabiki would hardly use a word like Daddy in a normal situation, "you won't get away with this!"

"No you won't! They'll never know about tonight!" Ranma's voice said firmly.

There was a pause, as if the voice of Nabiki was considering her horrible alternatives. Then, Nabiki's voice acquiesced, "Okay fine, I won't tell…" Fear seemed to fill Nabiki's voice, "Oh Ranma, please don't, please don't hurt me…I'll be good…"

Ranma voice sounded bewildered, "Jeez, why are you getting so dramatic…"

Then

Rip, rip, rip. The sound of probably fabric being torn.

Reaching the door, Akane almost torn it apart. For a brief moment, a horrible image of Ranma's evil form surrounding a naked, helpless, and crying Nabiki appeared in her mind – that jerk, I can't believe he's my fiancée!

"Ranma Saotome!" Akane boomed out as the door boomed open, outside, a boom of thunder echoed her booming anger. Raising her mallet, Akane charged at Ranma, failing to notice that both Ranma and Nabiki had their clothe on, the deviant grin on Nabiki's face, and the fact that Ranma was holding pieces of torn negatives while fiercely protesting it was all just a mix-up.

By the time the family found out the truth about what occurred between Ranma and Nabiki, it was already well into the night, even some into the next day – which was a school day. In the end, only Ranma slept well that night, mostly because Akane forgot to remove her mallet from Ranma. And to think, tomorrow, Ranma will have to battle Kuno!