Chaos loomed through his mind as he raced down stone steps to his apartments.
That foolish idiot boy! I don't care WHAT vision he saw in his head. He deliberately tried to get that retched excuse for a Ministry spy to threaten my job AND my safety just because he saw a nightmare of that MISERABLE wretch he calls a godfather! Merlin's blood, if I could have five seconds to teach that whelp a lesson…
Within moments he was within safety. He knew that as long as Umbridge was busy with the do-gooding Gryffindor brats, he'd have a few precious seconds where he wouldn't get caught. Umbridge may be completely entranced by Fudge and the Ministry, but there were others as closely connected to the office that had their loyalties in a whole other set of circles.
Getting caught now could mean his life.
Throwing floo powder into his fireplace, he glanced over his shoulder before whispering the address, stepping through quickly, before he could be discovered.
"Snape."
The bitter voice speaking his name could only belong to one man. Immediately, seven years of childhood torment and a shared animosity took over Severus' better judgment. "Well, I always knew the boy would eventually go off his rocker. Now I have proof."
Sirius Black paced towards him, a caged beast who had been taunted one time too many by his keepers. "What are you blathering about, Snivellus?"
He reached into his robe pocket for his wand, clenching it for a sense of safety. "Your beloved little James Jr. had a bad dream, evidentally. He claims he saw you, in the Department of Mysteries. And since the son is so very like the father, he'll likely be seeking you out there. After all, Potter Sr. was always a bit rash, a bit arrogant in his belief in his own immortality. All of this, I can assure you, the Dark Lord counts on. Which means the boy is walking into a trap."
Immediately, Sirius lost his arrogance, as he and the other figures in the room, Lupin and Moody, jumped to their feet. "Harry? Department of Mysteries? TRAP!" Sirius glared at the man he hated more than any other. "How can you be so sure?"
Severus narrowed his eyes in anger, curling his lip before pulling a deadpan impression of Harry Potter's voice. "They've got Padfoot! They've got Padfoot in the place where it's hidden!"
The shock and realization of what was going on hit all three men at once. "The visions…the Occlumency… he thinks you-know-who…"
Severus Snape merely stood there, eyeing the trio. "Brilliant deductions, one and all."
Lupin pulled Black away before he could throw a punch.
As pandemonium organized itself in the large house, Severus paced, waiting for a safe time to return to the school. Umbridge may be occupied, but those idiots she placed in small pockets of power weren't, and he'd taken chance enough in coming to give these men their warning. He lost just as much as they did if the Dark Lord succeeded.
Too bad they couldn't grasp that.
Whatever. Likely, all they'd do is offer me pity. Gods strike me dead before I accept that from any of these self-righteous pawns…
As plans were quickly made and groups pulled together, to both stand watch and to go off on their little rescue mission, he kept pacing, eyes narrowed, posture the same intimidating, hostile one he'd used to preserve himself for most of his life.
"Ah, Severus. Spot of tea?"
Dedalus Diggle was many things. Oblivious to his desire for solitude was one of them.
"No, thank you."
Dedalus nodded, pouring himself his cup. "Nasty evening. First, that business with the break-in at St. Mungo's, and now this bad news about Potter and the Ministry. Two battles in one night. What a horrible way to start the war."
Severus turned slowly on his heel. "Two?"
Diggle nodded, sipping from his cup. "Oh, that's right. You were at the school – you wouldn't know. A group of followers of You-Know-Who broke into the hospital tonight to release a trio of vampires who were being held there, treated for injuries before their trials. Doge and Vance were sent alone to go handle them. Doge took some injuries, but Vance made it alright." Looking up, the stately witch of whom Diggle spoke entered the room, looking exhausted. "Ah! Emmeline! I was just telling Snape about your evening."
Groaning silently, Severus endured the moment, interested only in the topic at hand.
Vampires…
Vance nodded. "Bloody mess over there. Most of them were clearly newly-recruited. They didn't follow order or pattern. We managed to capture most of them. Aurors are interrogating them now." Stretching, she took a deep breath, trying to rest shaking hands. "No matter who you're facing in battle, it's never easy to use an unforgivable. And to have to use that one, even in self-defense…" Her voice trailed off for a moment, before forcing herself to snap back to reality. "Clearly, he had no idea I spent summers in Italy with my aunt Gemma. I understood every order he gave them."
Italy…
Severus forced himself to ask the question, a deep sinking fear crawling into his very gut. "Did…did the captured give you any information?"
Vance nodded, her forehead crinkling as she took in the man before her. Although she rarely spoke with Snape, his voice seemed less solid than usual, his face more pale. If she didn't know better, he was showing…concern? "They did. At least one of them finally identified the body. You might have known him… he's older. I know Moody recognized the name. What was it again? Siniri? Sinisi?" For a moment, she paused to think, a look of triumph finally crossing her face. "Sinistra! Claudius Sinistra."
Vance and Diggle stared in confusion as Snape bolted for the fireplace before she even finished speaking the name.
Footsteps pounded as he tore from his apartments, racing up the winding staircases. A stitch in his side grew almost unbearable before he realized he wasn't breathing. He didn't care who had seen him return anymore. They wouldn't be able to find the house anyway – the protections were there. But if any of the watchers watched for someone else…
None of that mattered anymore. Only one thing did.
How in Hades do I tell her?
Reaching her apartment door, he knocked once. Twice. Thrice. No answer. Holding his side, trying to breathe away the pain, he moved to turn away when he heard a noise.
Heartsick sobbing.
Pushing the door open, he found Selene, on her knees in her living room, clutching a ruby necklace, the stone cracked in two, tears and racking sobs shaking Selene as she weaved back and forth.
He took a step towards her, his hand out. "Selene? I…"
A hiss and a deep growl were his only warnings, before Galileo leapt from the top of a bookcase between them both, fangs bared and fur standing on end. Posture was clear, especially given the history of communication between the man and feline.
Leave her be. Get the hell out.
He wasn't about to listen to that kneazle half-breed right now.
"Selene…"
"Get out."
The words were barely whispered between sobs, Selene choking on her tears, the pain in her heart overwhelming. The effects of the sanguini charms were absolute. Just as Claudius would have known the second any pain or harm came to Selene, she knew with undeniable clarity what had happened.
The anger. The thrill. The rush of adrenaline. The dark hatred.
The flash of green light. The sense of evaporating.
Silence.
The shattering of the necklace as she held it tight, praying it wasn't so.
She could feel him still hovering, silently watching her.
A spark of consciousness flared in her mind.
"You did this!"
Severus knelt down beside her, a hand moving to rest on her shoulder, Galileo growling, actually spitting at him. "I did what?"
She shoved his hand away, surging to her feet with a sense of power that knocked him backwards. "You did this! You lying son of a squib! You killed my brother!"
A fog of confusion slid through his mind. "Me? Selene, I've been here the whole time. How could I…?"
"You betrayed him!" Her voice screamed, shattering the air around them. "You betrayed them all! You turned on them and played tattletail to Dumbledore, and now my brother is dead! Killed! By your precious Order of the bloody Phoenix!"
Every sentence was punctuated by her reaching for anything near her to fling in his general direction – a pillow, a paperweight, a book on Astrological Phenomena in the Middle Ages. Severus raised his arms to block them, pushing up to his feet, reaching for her arms to stop her. "Selene…that's not true…"
She jerked one hand out of his grasp, her palm flying in the air to slap him square across his cheek. "You lying bastard! They killed him! I felt it! I heard the curse and I saw the light and I FELT HIM DIE! And you're one of them…" Her screams died down, her nails digging into her palm, still clenching the shattered stone tight in her fist. The voice that now came from the slender witch was soft, defeated, lifeless. "I never told him about you… I never said anything… I kept my promise…why did he have to die?"
The pain radiated from her, rage mixing with a bone-deep sorrow. He reached for her again, his voice low. "I didn't know, Selene. I would have done what I could if I'd known…"
Disgust, anger, fury crackled the air. She shoved him away, fumbling in her robe pockets, finally finding her wand. Gripping it in her free hand, she aimed it right at him, despite her body's shaking. "Liar. Get the hell out. NOW!"
"Selene, please…"
The hex missed him, but caught the hem of his robes, searing a hole through them, striking the wall behind him. Stonework sizzled as the power struck it. Selene's eyes blazed hotly, but her voice was glacial. "I said get out."
Swallowing, Severus did the only thing he could. He quietly turned the doorknob and strode into the hallway.
He spent an hour there, leaning against the cold stones, then a second. He listened to every anguished wail, every fresh burst of tears and painful sobbing. It wasn't until a house-elf came for him, demanding his attentions, that he realized the sun had risen. The battle was fought. A life was taken. The end was beginning. All of which had taken place without him even being aware of the world around him.
All he knew was that, again, a choice he'd made had broken a heart.
The sun rose twice more before he finally made his way back up the stone stairs. The time in between had been reeling, to say the least.
Sirius Black was dead. Lost forever. And while a quiet corner of his mind found a level of twisted satisfaction in the man's death, he found himself feeling empty. It wasn't right, his death. It lacked finality, it lacked absolution. Now the chance to finally end the bitter feud was lost to the ages.
His arm burned relentlessly, and he found himself called back to his Lord time and time again. All with Dumbledore's silent acknowledgment. After his return to the school, one pointed look had made it clear that his role in the world was still vital, still necessary. It sickened him. Selene's absence in those days shook his acceptance of the order of things. He no longer was content slipping around corners or slithering through loopholes.
Severus Snape was, for lack of a better expression, sick and tired of the world.
He found himself outside the familiar door, one that scant weeks before, he would have opened without hesitation or fear. Now, it seemed a physical manifestation of the barrier that had clearly come between them.
Swallowing his pride, he knocked.
The door opened, slowly, showing him not the red-rimmed, deep brown eyes he'd expected to find, but a sadden, sympathetic set of blue.
"Severus. I almost wondered how long you planned to linger in the hallway."
He swallowed, his small black eyes narrowing. "Headmaster. If I may be so bold, what exactly are you doing in Professor Sinistra's apartments?"
Dumbledore sighed, his posture showing his exhaustion and age. "Waiting for you, Severus."
"I don't follow." Severus' eyes traveled the room. Many of the items remained, but a few treasured pieces were missing, if one knew where to look and what to seek. The small framed picture of Sicily, waves crashing on a shoreline, was missing. So was a book, bound in wine-colored leather, in which Selene kept her diary. And a small crystal ball possessing constellations, which always stayed on the coffee table and had often been the only illumination in the room during some of their evenings together.
His mind knew the answer even before he spoke the question.
"Where is she?"
Albus Dumbledore closed his eyes before speaking. "She's gone, Severus."
"She can't be gone."
The stubborn, almost petulant tone of his voice made the headmaster pity him even more. "I received her resignation this morning. I'm sorry, Severus. She's gone."
When the door slammed shut, hard enough to shake candles in their sconces all around the room, Dumbledore merely whispered a prayer. Not only for the lost, but for the seeking as well.