Author's Notes: We're halfway there! The next couple of chapters will take longer, simply because I'm planning out some major deviations from canon. As such, to preserve the gist and spirit of the game, I need more time to organize the altered plot.

At any rate, I'm taking a bit of a break, so here's a little something that has absolutely nothing to do with the story.

Translation note: "Omake" is basically a special. Like a Christmas Special or something. Or a toy you get in a cereal box.

It's A Padding-Out-the-Midpoint-of-the-Fanfic Happy-Happy Omake Special!

All: "It's Omake Fun-Fun Time!"

(Setting is a lounge)

Sten: So what's all this for?

Bow/Boche: Dunno. Ryu gave Aspara and me tickets.

Rand: I got mine from Rinpoo. How'd you get in, Sten?

Sten: (smiles innocently)

(Boche and Rand share a wary glance)

Both: Right. Not asking.

Sten: Anyway, what is all this for? I mean, it's a pretty ritzy lounge. I didn't know Ryu knew anyone on this end of the social ladder.

Rand: He said something about knowing the singers.

Sten: (excited) Really? Are they cute? I hear that the girls here are real cute.

Boche: (also excited) I should hope so!

Spar/Aspara: So what exactly is this…lounge singing?

Boche: It's an event where you can watch sexy girls dress in super-sexy outfits!

Rand: Ahem. More precisely, it's entertainment. People sing to people having dinner in a "lounge" like this one.

Spar: How every intriguing.

Sten: And don't forget the girls!

Rand: Shh! It's starting!

(Stage lights come on; Nina enters, dressed to kill in a glimmering, hip-hugging black slip. She is followed by Katt/Rinpoo, who is dressed in red silk with the skirt slit up both sides and with a dipping V-cut that goes down to her navel. Bleu/Deis also follows, dressed in a dark blue top cut like Rinpoo's)

(Background beat begins; the girls are strutting around in a triangle around the microphone stands. They finally stop at the microphones with Nina as lead singer, Rinpoo to her left, and Deis to her right.)

Nina: (leans in) Better listen up, girls.

Rinpoo: (shaking a finger) Better leave your umbrellas at home.

Deis: Better get out of the house, because…

All three: …according to all sources, the streets are the place to go!

Nina: 'Cause tonight, for the first time, just about half past ten—

Rinpoo: For the first time in history—

Deis: (grabs her mike off the stand, heads to the edge of the stage and belts) It's gonna start raining men!

All three: It's raining men! Hallelujah, it's raining men. Amen!

Nina: I'm gonna go out and gonna let myself get—

All three: (all three girls run their hands down their breasts, bellies, and thighs, mimicking the flow of water) Absolutely soaking wet!

Rinpoo: (solo; background beat quiets) It's raining men! (background beat resumes)

Hallelujah, it's raining men! Every specimen—

Deis: Tall, blonde, dark, and lean!

Deis and Rinpoo: (both girls face stage right and slide up and down) Rough and tough and strong as mean!

All three: (all three girls go back into triangle formation and raise their arms above their heads) Gotta thank Mother Nature.

Deis: She's a single woman, too!

Rinpoo: She took over Heaven—

Nina: (emphasizing every word with a shake of her finger) And she did what she had to do!

Deis: She took every angel, she rearranged the sky—

Rinpoo: So that each and every woman—

Nina and Rinpoo: Could find the perfect guy!

Deis: (belts) Oh, it's raining men, yeah!

(Interlude: The girls shuffle across the stage. Then Ryu, Ray, and Ganer come out and each pick up a girl by the waist and twirl them around. The girls dance with the men, with a lot of grinding. They part and spread away, putting the spotlight on Ryu. Ryu dances like there's no tomorrow. Then the girls surround him and he lifts them up, one on each shoulder and one straddling his neck. Then he sets the girls down. He and the men leave the stage.)

Rinpoo: For the first time in history, it's gonna start raining men!

Deis: (belts) It's raining men! Hallelujah it's raining men!

All three: Amen! It's raining men! Oh yeah, Hallelujah, it's raining men!

Deis and Rinpoo: Amen!

Nina: It's raining men!

Deis and Rinpoo: Hallelujah, it's raining men, yeah!

(The girls all bow, to the thunderous applause of the audience. Umbrellas are thrown onto the stage.)

(Focus returns to the boys; Boche, Rand, and Sten are simply dumbfounded. Spar is passive.)

Sten: No…freaking…way. Nina wore THAT? Our Nina?

Boche: More like "Rinpoo wore THAT?" And why doesn't she wear it more often? Woof!

Rand: I didn't know Ryu could dance.

Boche: I didn't know Ryu could grind!

Aspara: What is this…grinding you speak of? It sounds painful and reminds me of the mashing of many small ball-shaped beans with a millstone. Many seeds have been destroyed because of grinding.

Boche: (paling) Yeah, I don't know if that's supposed to be an innuendo or not, but thanks for the mental image.

Aspara: (thoughtfully) It is a catchy tune. And very true—Mother Nature is a single woman, to which I can attest.

Sten: That wasn't the point.

Aspara: I'm sorry? Then what is the point?

Boche and Sten: The dresses, of course!

Rand: (stands up) All right, that's it, I can't stand the inane babble any longer. We're ending this omake right now! Stupid 15 to 20-year old male target audience!

Author's Note Redux: When you play video games on an emulator while listening to 80s music, you get the urge to write things like this. I don't know about you, but my favorite part was the dresses. And not just any dresses—shiny dresses! Woof! And I love it when singers belt. It just sounds cool.

Stay tuned for the next half of the Breath of Fire 2 novel and the next omake!