Edited Version. Million thanks to Grumman-san for the wonderful corrections and suggestions. Domo arigatou!
Wallet-sized Affection
Hyuuga Neji sat cross-legged with his eyes closed, his back against the trunk of a tree. He shifted, visibly agitated, before heaving an exasperated sigh. Three meters away his teammates, Rock Lee and Tenten, were still exchanging annoying whispers regarding God-knows-what. Well, he'd had a vague idea of what they were talking about, and a small part of him had been curious as to what really was behind that mystery... But since he was Hyuuga Neji, and his clan's prided prodigy at that, he let the bigger and saner part of him to decide that whatever Lee and Tenten were discussing would just gross him out.
With the usual sounds of clashing weapons and bursting chakras replaced by the almost-conspiratorial murmurs of two teenagers, the training ground of Team Gai had been abnormally quiet. Neji usually preferred silence, especially when it came to Lee and Gai-sensei, but he would gladly throw away such deserved silence if his training time was the price he had to pay.
He opened an eye to check on the two, and found that they still showed no signs that they'd stop chattering any time soon. 'So this is what Tenten meant with her "Just a minute"', he thought impatiently, closing his eyes again.
He had to blame his crazy teacher for dragging his sparring partner into such stupidity. Ten minutes ago, Gai-sensei gave them a "very important and interesting training mission": to find out who was the woman he loved the most. Lee, as expected, was ecstatic, believing the crap Gai-sensei told them about honing their data-gathering skills. Neji, also as expected, was sensible enough to know that this was just one of their teacher's mad ideas (something which he never seemed to run out of), so when he turned to Tenten he expected her to throw an infuriated look they always shared whenever Lee and Gai-sensei came up with something ridiculous. So he was very taken aback when he saw Tenten's chocolate brown eyes gleaming with a very strange light. In fact, Neji could sense that she was actually eager to do the mission. Gai-sensei delivered a dramatic farewell before he disappeared with a puff of smoke.
"Alright! Let's not waste the precious time of our youth and start our mission!" Lee roared excitedly.
"Okay!"
"Tenten, you know this mission is stupid…" Neji hissed frantically at the kunoichi's ear, trying to save her from falling to the pit of lunacy. But when Tenten let out an uncharacteristic giggle he knew she would not listen to reason any longer.
"C'mon Neji, youre such a kill joy!" she chuckled playfully.
"That's right! We need full cooperation otherwise the flames of our youth will extinguish!"
"And what about our training session?" Neji demanded, completely ignoring Lee.
"Well, that can wait. This will be over in just a minute," with that she and Lee entered their own world and discussed animatedly the possible identities of the unlucky-, or rather, the mystery girl in Gai-sensei's heart. Tenten tugged at Neji's sleeve, trying to pull him closer to the conversation, but Neji stubbornly pulled away. And when they dared to ask him of his opinion, they were not greatly surprised to see two milky-white orbs glaring murderously at them.
After listening to the first minute of Lee and Tenten's brainstorming, Neji concluded that he couldn't stand more of it so he left the two alone. He would just wait for Tenten to finish, trusting that she would not take long.
But a good twenty minutes had already passed and his teammates' enthusiasm had not declined one bit. He opened his eyes again, only to see Lee whispering something to Tenten's ear, making the kunoichi blush. A vein in Neji's temple twitched, but he collected himself quickly. He was closing his eyes again when he heard approaching footsteps. Looking up, he saw Tenten walking up to him, and after giving her an annoyed you-did-take-long glare she smiled apologetically, sticking her tongue out like a kid.
"Yosh! My dear teammates," Lee called, his abnormally round eyes fiery with newfound determination, "I'll be off to accomplish our noble mission! Tenten, you've been much of a help. And so have you, my eternal-rival Hyuuga Neji, for you have always challenged me to achieve greater things! Farewell!" He waved goodbye to them and ran off. Tenten waved back, watching the Green Beast disappear from sight.
"So, can we start now?" Neji asked. His tone suggested there was only one correct answer.
Tenten drew a handful of shuriken from her holster. "As you wish, Neji-sama."
"Well, now I know it's dangerous to make you wait," Tenten muttered sourly, cleaning small cuts on her arm. Their duel lasted for five hours almost non-stop, the kunoichi having to endure the seemingly bottomless stamina of the Hyuuga. She barely had time to pause for breath during their intense battle, and with that she knew that she really had gotten Neji pissed.
"Just take it as a test of endurance," Neji said smirking, handing her a water bottle. Tenten emptied it down her throat.
"Thanks. Now I'm really starving…" she gave Neji a significant look. "Maybe I could do with some ramen..."
Neji arched an eyebrow. He knew where this was getting, and Tenten's toothy grin already told him everything. He shook his head and sighed in defeat, "Alright, let's go to Ichiraku. My treat."
"Yay!" Tenten leapt on her feet and clung to Neji's left arm, "No taking back, okay? I won't let you escape."
"I can see that," he muttered inaudibly, glancing at his arm, which was held in a death grip against her chest. He quickly looked away and tried to ignore the tingling sensation running all over his body.
"But I'm still not sure that you won't go away," she said jokingly as they began to walk. "So," she started again, and Neji noticed a faint blush on her cheeks, "will you give me your wallet then?" When Neji looked at her questioningly she childishly mumbled "As a collateral."
The Hyuuga rolled his eyes. "You've got some nerve to even ask for this," he snapped, but gave her his wallet all the same. Tenten smirked triumphantly, and let go of Neji's arms, making Neji groan inwardly.
"You know, Lee told me a very good strategy for how to find out the identity of Gai-sensei's girl," Tenten piped out of the blue, tossing Neji's wallet into the air and catching it as she walked.
"Don't tell me you're really riding on that silly mission…"
"Well," she said, making a fantastic catch, a brighter blush creeping on her cheeks, "as it's Lee it is bound to be unreliable, but I think I'll give it a try."
They walked a few steps in silence before Tenten started again, her voice trembling a bit, "You see, Lee told me that you can know who a boy likes if you search for a certain thing…"
"…"
Tenten stopped her tossing and stared at the object in her hand for one whole minute, "…for a certain thing… in his wallet."
Neji turned sharply towards her, his heart suddenly racing. But before he could grab his wallet back Tenten had already jumped a safe distance away from him, inspecting it like a detective. It was only after a few seconds when she heard her gasp.
"Tenten!" he approached her quickly, snatching his wallet back. But he knew it was already too late, his wallet had already revealed everything, and the stunned look on Tenten's face was the glaring proof. Though he tried to stop himself he still blushed profusely, and cursed his hyperactive hormones for making him so.
"N-Neji, I-I d-didnt k-know. I-I never exp-," stuttered Tenten, her cheeks pinker than before. Neji avoided her eyes, wincing. He'd imagined that he would tell her, eventually. Definitely not this way. Not by her finding that photo…
"I never knew. I didn't have the slightest idea… Oh Neji…"
He could always make an excuse, tell her that what she saw didn't suggest anything at all, though he knew it would be hard to convince her since his reaction was too much of a give away. Maybe there was no point denying it. He closed his eyes and waited for her verdict.
"Well, t-this i-is totally uncalled for…"
It was coming.
"I never really expected you, Neji, of all people…"
He prayed to all gods that he would still have an ounce of dignity left after this.
"This is really… surprising…"
"…"
"Neji," she was approaching him, and for a second he thought to run for it. But his feet seemed to be glued on the ground. Doomsday was coming to him. Why did he have to put that photo in his wallet anyway? And why did he give it to Tenten, of all people? Well, he really hadn't expected her to rummage through its contents, right? He had thought of her as someone who respected other people's privacy. And now that image of her had already shattered into tiny pieces.
"Neji," she moved closer to him, the uncomfortable proximity making him stiff.
This is it.
"I'm really sorry…"
I see, as I expected.
"…Dont worry, I won't tell anyone about it…"
Of course you should, it was humiliating enough with just you knowing it.
"But honestly, t-this… i-is… j-just… too… much… for me…!" then she suddenly burst into a hearty laugh. Neji looked incredously at Tenten, who was already doubled up, clutching her stomach and laughing like she had never laughed before. The Hyuuga took a deep breath, feeling more mortified by her sudden outburst. Trust her to be this insensitive. She didn't have to laugh THAT hard…
"W-well, y-you s-see," she garbled between her chuckles, wiping tears from the corners of her eye, "that was actually too disturbing. I have nothing against your kinds, honestly, but this is the first time… and someone I know personally… Don't worry, I'm true to my word, I won't tell anyone…"
'Disturbing…?' 'your kinds…?' Neji looked skeptically at the giggling kunoichi. What did she mean? He opened his wallet to check on what she saw and realized, to his horror, that there had been a misunderstanding. A big, horrible misunderstanding. It was far worse than what he had expected.
"Really, Neji, you could have chosen someone who looks better, like the Uchihas! You've got no sense for beauty! Of all the men you could have liked, why Lee and Gai-sensei…"
"Tenten that's not it!" Neji yelled angrily, his face darkening. Tenten laughed even harder. Darn it, she mistook me for a homo!
"Oh come on Neji, there's no point hiding it! You have a photo of the two of them in your goddamned wallet!" she chortled as she returned to her feet. "C'mon, you still owe me a bowl of ramen!"
"But Tenten, you really got it wrong! You completely misun-" but she was already walking away before he could defend his masculinity.
Neji rubbed his temples, exhaustion suddenly catching up on him. Tenten was driving him nuts. The situation was giving him more reasons to say his true feelings for her as soon as possible. If she had only flipped the center leaf in his wallet, then they wouldn't come down to such confusion. Then she would have seen the real reason why he was dearly keeping that photograph…
Tenten couldn't suppress the goofy smile spreading on her face. It was the happiest day of her life. She felt guilty for pulling that prank on Neji, but she had to let him confess his true feelings in his own way. And maybe, when that day happened, she would show him that she was keeping the same photo in her wallet.
A photo of her, Neji, Lee, and Gai-sensei.
A photo folded so it would be just her and Neji in the frame.
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THE END (?)
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While running after the weapon mistress a piece of paper flew to Neji. He stopped, picked up the paper, noticed from its texture that it was a photograph, looked at it with curiosity, and almost puked on what he saw.
Winking at him was a female version of Gai-sensei, wearing a heavy make-up and an apple green spaghetti strap.
THE END.