I don't own anything here besides the storyline. Homestar Runner and all related characters belong to The Brothers Chapman.
One fine day in Free Country USA, Homestar Runner decided to pay a visit to Marzipan. He packed up some sandwiches for lunch, and began jogging to Marzipan's house. It was not long before the first plot complication arrived in the form of The Cheat and Strong Bad.
The Cheat and Strong Bad had been hanging out at the stick, preparing to light up Strong Sad's favorite blue underwear when they spotted Homestar.
"Hey, The Cheat, lets get those sandwiches from Homestar. Stealing that can of Gasoline from Bubs' Concession Stand has worked up my appetite."
The Cheat enthusiastically agreed in cheatish, and the two ran off to find a hiding place from which to ambush Homestar.
Moments later, Homestar's journey was rudely interrupted when Strong Bad and the Cheat leaped out of hiding wearing ski masks.
"Okay, dorkstar, hand us over the sandwiches and nobody gets hurt." Strong Bad threatened.
"Oh, hi Stwong Bad." Homestar said.
"I'm not Strong Bad… I'm… uh… um…" The Cheat whispered something to Strongbad, then Strong Bad continued, "I'm Biscuit Dough Hands Man! I'm gonna get you if you don't hand over those sandwiches."
"Well, these sandwiches are fow me and Mawzipan. I can't give you these ones." Homestar started to walk away, but The Cheat jumped in front of him and yammered at him in cheatish.
"Yeah, you gotta pay the toll before you leave." Strong Bad agreed. "Cough it up, crap for brains."
"And why should I?" Homestar demanded.
"Cuz it's a toll. You have to pay a toll, or you like, get put in jail." Strong Bad replied.
"Okay, hewe, you can have a dollaw fifty. That's all I got." Homestar produced some change and gave it to The Cheat.
"I guess that'll do. For now. Come on, The Cheat… lets go get some candy bars." Strong Bad and The Cheat ran off toward Bubs' Concession Stand.
Homestar continued on until he finally reached Marzipan's house. He walked up the door and knocked. "Mawzipan! I made us some sandwiches." Homestar called, but even after he waited there was no reply. "Mawzipan?" Homestar walked over to a window and looked in, but there was no sign of Marzipan. "That's odd. Where's Mawzipan?"
Homestar headed to the King of Town to ask if he'd seen Marzipan. He saw the King of Town talking to Coach Z about something interesting he had eaten the other day outside of the castle. "Hello, guys. Have you seen Mawzipan?"
"No… but I see you have brought me tribute in the form of two delicious sandwiches!" The King of Town eyed up Homestar's sandwiches hungrily.
"Oh, no these are fow me and Mawzipan. Have you seen her at all, Coach Z?"
"Norp. Did you see if she's ort playing cards with Strong Sad?" Suggested Coach Z.
"Hey, good idea! Thanks guys." Homestar went to see Strong Sad next. He found him at the stick, rescuing his blue underwear from a pile of kindling.
"Homestar, do these smell like gasoline to you?" Strong Sad wondered, holding out his blue underwear.
"Ew, I'm not smelling your undewweaw. Have you seen Mawzipan?" Homestar inquired.
"No… Marzipan and I play bridge on Wednesdays. Today Homsar and I were supposed to be playing battleship, but when I noticed my blue underwear were missing-"
"Okay, thanks Stwong Sad." Homestar interrupted, dashing off to find someone else to ask.
Homestar ran to Bubs, the Poopsmith, and Pom Pom, but none of them had seen Marzipan either. In a final act of desperation, Homestar went to find Strong Bad to ask for help. He arrived at Strong Bad's couch, panting and distressed. "Stwong Bad! You have to help me find Mawzipan! I can't find hew anywhewe!" He said between breaths.
Strong Bad was watching TV and eating a candy bar with The Cheat sitting next to him. "Can't you see I'm watching something? Go find her yourself." Strong Bad took another bite of his candy bar.
"But- but- I made hew this sandwich-"
"Oh. Tell you what, you leave your sandwiches here with me and The Cheat, and we will keep an eye on them until you find Marzipan." Strong bad offered.
"Gee, thanks Stwong Bad! What a pal. I bettew go find Mawzipan now. Hewe are the sandwiches." Homestar dropped the sandwiches on the couch next to Strong Bad.
"Take your time." Strong Bad and The Cheat exchanged glances and laughed evilly as Homestar left to continue his search.
Homestar wandered far and wide looking for Marzipan until he ended up completely lost. "Which way should I go…" Homestar pondered, looking in every direction, but the green cartoon-ish hills all looked the same. He randomly chose a direction and continued walking, but he only ended up more lost, and it was starting to get dark. He was just getting worried when he spotted something on the side of a nearby hill. It was a vertical, pixelated line that seemed to start just above the ground.
"What in the name of Michael Cwichton is going on hewe?" Homestar wondered. He inspected the strange line. "It looks like thewe is a cwack in my web page." Homestar noted. He kicked his foot at the line, and his foot disappeared for a moment. "Weiwd!" Homestar walked toward the line, and suddenly he disappeared from view.