Disclaimer; I stole the preciousss! My preciouss…

Chapter 5: What Am I Doing Here?

A/N: Although it may not be evident in this chapter, for strategic purposes later on Gandalf has not yet left middle earth like he does in the movies.

It was early spring in Mirkwood forest, the trees waking up in bursts of green after the winter cold. Legolas smiled to himself. This would always be his favourite time of the year, he thought, acknowledging another greeting from one of his woody friends.

The Gondorian party had arrived in autumn and stayed over the winter. Now it was spring they would be returning to Gondor within the next few days. Legolas would be going with them. Since most of the elves were leaving there was really nothing left for him to do here$. Then he remembered who else would be coming along with them, the other-world-girl, as he called her, Bridget. She was currently sitting in a tree watching everyone prepare to leave. He assumed, since she had very little that actually belonged to her, that she had already finished packing.

She had been with them for just over three months now, and her injuries had pretty much healed$$. Legolas had decided, although not with complete certainty, that Bridget was sane. There was no denying that she was defiantly strange, but the trees spoke well of her so Legolas let it pass.

Bridget was depressed. The trees were nice here; lots of big branches with scratchy bark and moss and lichens, but that didn't change the fact that she was stuck in a strange world, entirely dependant on the charity of others.

When she had first let herself believe that she really was in Middle-Earth, and it really was Legolas, gorgeous elvan prince of Mirkwood who was talking to her, she had been ecstatic. Thoughts of countless Mary-sue fan fictions had flashed through her mind. 'I'm a Mary-sue! Legolas is mine!' she'd thought, 'My preciousss…'

But she'd always had multiple personalities, and the sensible, cynical one had chosen that exact moment to show up and remind her that she was not a story$$$, but a real person.

Bridget sighed. In fan fiction it was so easy for the girl to capture Legolas's heart; he didn't care that they weren't elves, but mortals, he loved them even if they weren't the most beautiful, it didn't matter if they were all crazy psychos from another world… All Bridget could do was sigh.

"Oh well, she thought, I've kissed him, and that's more than most."

But she was still depressed.

She had no idea what she was here for. The war of the ring was over, so yeah, she new what was going to happen, but so did they, they'd been there.

And now she was being dragged across the bloody country because they didn't know what to do with her either. She'd miss this forest, even if she wasn't the Mary-sue; some of the other elves here were really cool. And she was enjoying passing on her warped sense of humour. There was one elf in particular, a bit on the thin side (although you could never call an elf scrawny), who had caught on to her idea of fun real quick.

Bridget constantly insulted Calmacil$$$$, and he gave as good as he got. He looked like most other elves did, fair of face, pale blue eyes and fine straight, silvery-blond hair. Despite all this, he still reminded her of her friend Stephen, back in the real world, and they had become fast, um, for lack of a better word, friends.

"Speak of the devil" Bridget mumbled, spotting Calmacil walking beneath her tree. She threw an acorn at his head.

"Oww!"

"Hey Cilly! What's up?"

"Oh, it's you." He said looking up, "I thought it was someone important."

"That's not very nice! Scrawny weed lover!"

"Get down here and say that to my face you dirty little urchin!" he yelled, waving his fist.

(They're not very insulting I know, but these two are just very immature together.)

Legolas shook his head. Over the past few months those two had wrecked havoc on Mirkwood. He gave an involuntary shudder, remembering how they had set the kitchen on fire; the place had smelled of smoke for almost a week. Then there was the time when half the palace had woken up with moustaches drawn on their faces. The elven maidens had been particularly, um… upset. Legolas just hoped Bridget would calm down when she was with her own kind. Then again, maybe she'd get worse, and that was a scary thought.

$I'm taking authors liberty here, and forgetting for the purpose of story that Legolas goes to Fangorn Forest and the Glittering Caves with Gimli. Bloody dwarf.

$$I've no idea how long it actually takes for a broken arm to heal, even though my sister broke her arm. Shows how observant I am aye?

$$$Don't you love the irony? Oh the irony$$$$$

$$$$When I put my name in the elven name generator, my last name was Calmcacil, which I can't even pronounce. So I think Calmacil will pass for an elf name.

$$$$$Sorry about all the doller signs, but I've been reading Terry Pratchett. Go Discworld! (actually, i wanted stars,(they were supposed to be stars!), but FFNet doesn't accept them, grumblegrumble, and doller signs were the only thing they would accept multiple times! Talk about frustrating...) STARS!

A/N: Chapter 5 is kind of a jump chapter, because the characters have to hurry-up and get to Gondor in order for the story to progress, and I couldn't think of another way to get them there, so, sorry for the lack of 'action'.