"We were lovers."

He lowered his eyes, unable to keep the pain from them. She noticed the expression on his face, and knew that there was no happy ending to this story, yet she had to know.

"You said were. You mean we're not any more?"

"No."

Silence reigned again until she broke it, "Why?"

He didn't answer immediately, instead sighed, "It's complicated," he finally answered.

"Then explain."

He met her eyes again, and she saw the look of regret and sorrow in his blue ones.

"We were…then I left and when you came here, I was foolish. You got tired of waiting for me, and I think you were about to give up…"
"About to?"

"I did something stupid the other day, something to complicate matters even further. I kissed you."

Sara starred at him, "And?"

"I asked you to take me back. You said…you said you would have to think about it."

He watched her face, but she wasn't the same Sara, he couldn't read her look the way he used to be able to. She seemed to be processing the information he had given her, as minimal as it was, and thinking about her response. She cleared her throat, and then looked him in the eye, "Grissom…I think I understand why Sara, I mean, I would want to think about what you asked. From what you've told me, you waited a long time to try and re-connect with me. I think a lot of girls would have given up on a man like you by now," she watched the pain flash in his eyes and regretted her words, but forged on, "And I think that the old Sara, this woman you are trying to describe to me, might have taken you back. But you have to understand that I am different now, I feel different, and I don't think I can take you back. Especially without any more knowledge of the past, and my own feelings. I'm really sorry, and I know this probably hurts, but Grissom, you waited to long, and if you wait to long, then the moment of opportunity passes by."

"You probably don't remember it, but you've told me that before," he replied quietly.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

He nodded, "It's alright…I should go now I guess," he got up and slowly made his way to the door. He stopped in the doorway and looked back at her. A single tear was running down her face, "I'm sorry Grissom," she whispered as he left the room, her heart breaking for a past that she couldn't remember, and for the man whose heart she had broken.

"Hey, I brought you some tea," Nick said, handing the Styrofoam cup to Clara. She gratefully accepted it, holding it in her good hand, the other one bandaged up.

"It's hot. Careful," he added.

"Thanks Nick."

He watched her blow gently on the top of the liquid, thanking whoever was watching over her again that she had survived.

Shortly after the scare Clara had given him and Catherine, she had begun to regain consciousness. He would watch her move her head slightly, or make small noises in her sleep. Eventually she had opened her eyes, and as groggy as she was, she had smiled at him. Nick had to fight a fresh wave of tears when she had, choking back the lump in his throat to tell her how brave she was and that he was alright. Clara had fallen back asleep after that and a little while later, had woken up long enough to give Warrick her testimony against Officer Michaels. Nick had seen the terror and pain in her eyes as she recounted the ordeal, helpless to do anything but hold her hand and tell her it was over, and with her testimony, he would be put away for a long time. Clara truly was a fighter. It hadn't been her time to go, and he knew it.

"How's Cassie?" she said quietly.

Nick hadn't seen the little girl since before Clara had gone missing. He knew she was at her grandmother's house, and that the social worker had been checking in on her. He had only talked to her briefly on the phone after Clara was out of surgery, explaining that her aunt would be in the hospital for awhile. He recalled how Cassie had told him that she didn't want to be babied, that she wanted the truth. He told her what he could, giving her only small details of what had happened, and she promised to be brave. He had called her again only about half an hour earlier to let her know that Clara was awake. Cassie had been glad to hear that, and was eager to come visit both of them.

"She's being strong for us. She wants to come see you soon."

"I'd like that," Clara replied.

Nick stroked her hand, "Me too," he kissed it, grateful that the worst was over.

"Nick," he looked at her, "I know what you were trying to describe now. That feeling of being on the brink of death, and almost giving up. But I knew you were there. I heard you're voice. You never gave up on me…" her voice broke.

"I couldn't," he whispered.

"I love you Nick," a tear rolled down her cheek.

He wiped it away, his own eyes glossing over, "I love you too."

"Watch you're step," Greg instructed, helping Sara through the doorway of her apartment.

"So this is home," she marvelled, taking in the small place.

It was the next morning, and upon Sara's insistence that she was fine, the doctors had allowed her to be released, hoping that being at home would help her regain her memory. So with crutches and Greg to help her, she had set off to try to rebuild her life.

Greg took her suitcase and found her bedroom, placing it in there. He came back to the main room, where he found her hobbling around the kitchen, opening the odd cupboard to see what was inside.

"Do you want me to get you something?" he asked her.

"No, I think the groceries we picked up should do for now. Thanks anyways."

"Alright, well I should probably head out…"

"Greg, why don't you stay a bit. Can I make you some coffee?"

He didn't think that sounded like a bad idea. Greg didn't have anywhere else to actually go.

"Ok."

She gestured for him to make himself comfortable, so he sat down on the couch. After a brief search, she came up with some coffee and put on the maker. Then she made her way into the living room and sat down beside him.

"So, do you know what I normally do when I am not at work?" she asked curiously.

He laughed a little, "When are you not at work Sara?"

"You mean I'm a work-a-holic?"

He nodded, "Very much so."

"Well, now that I have some off time, I better find a hobby then. Do I have hobbies?"

Greg thought for a moment, "You like to sing…though only when you think no one can hear you. But you have a good voice."

"Really? So maybe we should go to a karaoke bar then," she smiled.

He returned her grin with a trademark one of his own, "It's good to see you smile."

She blushed, "I have some news," she said, the smile fading slightly.

He raised an eyebrow at her to go on.

"I talked to Grissom. Him and I, we're not in any sort of relationship."

"Oh?"
"No. We talked for awhile, and unless my memory comes back, then I don't think anything is going to happen between him and I. And even if it does, I would rather it be with you Greg."

Greg didn't reply at first, his thoughts turning to his supervisor. He had returned to work the night before, and Greg was finishing some paperwork. He had noticed how Grissom seemed even more sullen and solitary than before. He recalled how there seemed to be no life in the older man, how his shoulders sagged, and even the news that Michaels was going to trial didn't bring a spark to the blue eyes. Greg snapped out of his thoughts when he felt a hand on his,

"Are you ok Greg?"

"Yeah…fine."

"I thought you would be more happy now that we can be together."

He had thought so too. He tried to smile for her, "I am," he lied.

"Really?"

He nodded. She rubbed his hand, holding his gaze. Then Sara leaned in slowly. She closed her eyes and kissed him. He was motionless. Something was wrong.

"What is it Greg?" she asked, pulling away.

"This isn't right Sara. I've wanted this for a long time, but not this way."

"But I am Sara."

"You are, but you're not the same…I can't do this," he said quietly, standing up.

"Greg…"

He made for the door, "I'm sorry Sara. It's not right…I have to…I have to go."

"Greg wait," she pleaded, but he was already gone.

She felt her cheeks wet with tears as she sat back down on the couch, leaning her head against the back. She cried. She cried for Greg, for Grissom, and for her lost memory. She cried until she fell asleep.

Sara's dreams played out like a movie. She watched her memories slide by her, from her childhood to the present. When she awoke, her cheeks were still damp with tears.

She called a cab, and limped down to it, telling the driver where she wanted to go.

When they arrived at her destination, she paid and then declined the drivers help to navigate the stairs. She took them slowly, with each step, re-thinking her decision until she was standing outside the door, knocking, and waiting for destiny to answer.

Inside, he slowly rose from the couch, wondering who was calling on him. He had been trying to sleep off a migraine, trying to forget about what had happened.

He opened the door, surprised by who was on the other side.

"Sara?" he gaped.

And then he was reeling backwards slightly, as her open hand collided with his cheek, a loud smack echoing through the empty hall.

To be continued…

A question for my readers: How many of you would like to see this story end in GSR?

How many Sandle lovers would hate to see that?

You're votes will determine the ending….or maybe I'll have to write two.

Please let me know!
Happy Holidays and New Year!

-L