MY LITTLE SECRET

Chapter 4

I like being in the same room as you and your girlfriend.
The fact that she don't know,
That really turns me on.
She'll never guess in a million years,
That we've got this thing going on.

Three weeks later...

"Hey, Jess. Long time, no see," Stephanie quipped, smiling at the blonde woman standing in front of her. "Would you like to come in?"

"Yes, if that's ok with you," Jess said. Stephanie held the door to her hotel room open wider, and Jess stepped inside, looking around. "So, um, have you seen Chris?" she asked finally.

"Yes, actually, I saw him a little while ago," Stephanie replied, sitting down on the couch. She observed the other woman. "Why don't you sit down? You look like you need to have a girl talk."

Jess sat down in a nearby chair and turned to look at Stephanie. "Can I ask you something?"

"Ask away," Stephanie said, leaning back on the couch.

"Has Chris been acting weird around you lately?" Jess asked.

"No. He's been acting perfectly normal around me," Stephanie answered. If normal includes screwing me every chance he gets. She looked back at Jess. "Is something wrong?"

Jess sighed. "These past few months, I feel like he's been sort of drawn away from me. He's been really distant, and we hardly ever spend time together anymore..." She looked down for a minute, then back up. "I think there's...another woman."

"Another woman? No way!" Stephanie said quickly, maybe a little too quickly. "Chris isn't the type to cheat on anyone. He just doesn't have the heart to do something like that."

"There are so many women out there who want him, though!" Jess protested. "And I know the women out there are tempting to him. They're ten times prettier than me..."

"Don't talk that way," Stephanie said. "He doesn't look twice at those other women. He knows that he has the best one right here, and he's too...into you." And every chance he gets, he's trying to get into me, too...

A heavy silence fell over the room, and the distinct sound of the shower running in the bathroom could be heard. Jess looked at Stephanie with both eyebrows raised. "Who's in your shower?'

"In my shower?" Stephanie repeated nervously. Damn it, I thought he was sleeping! she cursed mentally. Take a deep breath, Steph. You have to stay calm before you panic... "Uh, that's just...Trish."

"Stratus? I wasn't aware that the two of you were friends," Jess said.

"Yeah, as unbelievable as that idea may seem, Trish and I are friends," Stephanie said, standing up. "And she tends to walk around naked after her showers... Let me go inform her that we have company."

"Actually, that's ok. I'm going to get going," Jess said, standing up and heading for the door. "Thanks for listening, though. And...could you do me a favor?"

"Sure," Stephanie said, glancing anxiously over at the bedroom door and hoping that Chris wouldn't start singing in the shower. That was a habit of his. He loved to show of his great voice in the shower, and normally, she loved for him to do just that. Now? Well, Jess was there now, and things would just get ugly...

"Could you keep an eye on Chris for me? Like, find out if he really wants to be with me," Jess said quietly. She went on in a choked voice. "Because I... I love him. I love him so much, and I feel like I'm losing him and there's no way for me to stop it. So could you do that for me, Steph? Since you're his best friend?"

"Yeah, I'll do that," Stephanie said, swallowing the suddenly huge lump in her throat. "I'm sure everything will work out for you guys." The other woman nodded, then left. Stephanie closed the door behind her and locked it, then headed for the bathroom. She walked to the bathroom and stepped inside just as Chris stepped out of the shower and wrapped a towel around his waist.

"Well hey there, Steph," he said in a low voice when he spotted her. "Are you back for round two?"

"Jess just came here," she told him in a soft voice. "And she thinks you're cheating on her with another woman."

You're my little secret,

And that's how we should keep it.

It's on everybody's mind, about you and I.

They think so, but they don't really know,

Or wanna know that...

"So let me get this straight. You two had a 'girl talk' about me?" Chris asked a few minutes later, standing in the doorway of the bedroom. He was wearing boxers now, and nothing else.

"Yeah, and she seemed so totally heartbroken," Stephanie said with a sad sigh. She stood near the bed with a sad expression on her face as she recalled how Jess had looked. "She looked so sad and lost... I just-"

"Hey, don't go all soft on me, McMahon," he interrupted, walking over to her. "Don't you start feeling sorry for her."

"I can't help it," she said, looking away. "She says she loves you...and I can tell by looking at her that it's true. She really does love you, and I'm just drawing you farther and farther away from her each time you and I get together... Maybe we should... Maybe we should stop."

"Don't kid around with me, Stephanie," he said, grabbing her roughly by the shoulders. "We can't just stop now, not when we both need this so much..." He shook her lightly. "I need this. I need you."

"I need you, too," she admitted. "But you have her, and now I'm feeling guilty. You didn't hear her, Chris, when she got all choked up and said that...that she loves you."

"But I'm your little secret, remember?" he went on. He pulled her to him, hugging her against him. "Steph, these past few months haven't been all about sex for me, believe it or not. Yeah, I've enjoyed our physical encounters, but now I've become so emotionally attached to you that I don't think I can imagine being without you. I don't want to be without you..."

"I don't want to be without you, either," she whispered in his ear. "But now it's getting so risky. Kurt is still bugging me about that night when I ditched him in the lobby, and that was three weeks ago. People are getting suspicious, Chris... I think that they're really beginning to suspect that something's up with you and me, something that transcends friendship."

"Then we'll make a deal," he said immediately, his hand soothingly making small circles over her back as he touched her.

You're my little secret,

And that's how we should keep it.

We should never let 'em know,

Never let it show.

"What kind of a deal?" she asked, shivering a little as he touched her, but leaning against him nonetheless. She so desperately wanted him to have some kind of brilliant plan that would make their relationship ok. She felt guilty when she thought about how this was affecting Jess, but selfishly, she just couldn't make herself let him go. She had become emotionally attached to him, too. While that hadn't been a part of the plan, somehow she was ready to accept it...

"When we're in public, we'll be less touch-feely," he said. "And we'll cut back on the flirting. Basically, we'll just pretend that we have a platonic relationship, that we're just friends."

"Even though that's the last thing I want to be now," she said with a sigh. "But I'm up for your little deal. We'll keep this thing we have a secret between us, and we'll never tell anyone about us."

"Right. And...whatever we feel...we won't let it show around anybody else," he added.

If you know, like I know,

We should never let it go.

Ten minutes later, they sat next to each other on the end of the bed, in complete silence. Stephanie broke the silence first.

"As strange as this will probably sound, especially coming from me, I don't want Jess to get hurt in all of this," she said quietly.

"I don't want her to get hurt, either," he said in a voice just as quiet as hers. "But I can't be without you, Steph. It's like you're essential for me to live or something, and that scares me because I don't feel this way about her."

"I feel the same way, but I still don't want her to get hurt," she repeated, looking at him. As she looked at him, she felt the tears coming to her eyes, and she looked away quickly. She'd never been that weak in front of him, actually crying, and she didn't want him to see her. "I know I started this whole thing, and the whole time I haven't really cared about how this little thing we have could affect anyone else...but she trusts me and I don't want to see her get hurt..."

"Well what do you expect me to do, Steph? Just forget about me and you, and be faithful to her? Is that what you want?" he asked in a shaky voice, turning her face back around to face him. He looked into her sparkling eyes and ran his thumb over her lip. "Because I'm not doing that. I can't do that, and I don't know how you could ask me to."

"I'm not asking you to," she whispered, reaching over to touch his face lightly. "But I have a feeling that things are going to blow up in our faces if we keep this up."

"That may be, but as long as we have each other in the end, we'll be ok," he said, leaning over to kiss her. "Whatever happens with me and Jess or with you and Hunter... It doesn't matter. I'm not letting you go..."

A/N: Two more chapters to go!