Reversal of Fortune
Disclaimer: I own none of this. Just having a little fun.
Setting/Spoilers: S2, sometime after Duet.
Summary: The team returns from a mission where Sheppard wasn't the center of attention, but he wishes he were.
A/N: This idea has been kicking around for awhile. Finally decided to write it after reading a couple recent stories. Yes, I will get back to my WIPs.
"I don't care. We are not going back," snapped Colonel John Sheppard as his team returned to Atlantis.
"I don't understand," started Lt. Laura Cadman, adding a "sir," after a moment's hesitation. "They are more than willing to trade," she indicated several bags of grain to Dr. Weir and the gateroom personnel that Ronon set down.
"Yes, they were most welcoming," added Teyla serenely. Elizabeth thought she detected something else the way her eyes flashed. Lt. Cadman looked like the cat who had eaten the canary and kept giving Col. Sheppard sideways looks. Dr. Beckett avoided Laura's eyes.
"And blonde, don't forget blonde," injected Dr. McKay, to which Sheppard simply rolled his eyes. Dr. Zelenka looked at his fellow scientist sheepishly. Ronon and Major Lorne said nothing, preferring to focus to focus on invisible points in space.
Seeking to end some of the tension, Elizabeth spoke, "All right, you know the drill, head to the infirmary, we'll meet in an hour." This ought to be good, she thought. She observed the team as they headed down the hall. Was Rodney's shirt inside out? Zelenka, Lorne and Rodney each appeared to have a bruises and bite marks that their collars couldn't quite cover, neither of which Rodney was complaining about. That had to be record. More interestingly, were those flowers in Ronon's braids? She turned her attention to the Colonel, he appeared fine, not a mark on him, but she could read the frustration in his shoulders, something was very wrong. What happened in the last three days?
Exactly fifty-nine minutes later, everyone was gathered in her office. "So how did the mission go," she asked as neutrally as possible.
For a few moments there was absolute silence as the men in the room looked at each other. Finally Teyla broke the silence. "Diosa is a matriarchal society and polygamous, the women taking a primary husband and several consorts. The marriage to a husband is usually arranged for political and economic reasons, his family is expected to provide money and goods." She paused for a moment, and Elizabeth smiled to herself, it was always interesting to hear about female-dominated societies. Teyla continued after a moment, "Consorts are usually selected for their skills, with an emphasis on the usefulness of their talents. They may be bound to one or several women and can be considered currency, exchanged to settle debts. Dr. McKay and Dr. Zelenka were considered very valuable because of their abilities to fix various pieces of equipment." Elizabeth quirked an eyebrow at Rodney, who blushed.
"As they say, 'the women weren't backward about being forward," he added hastily in his defense. Teyla looked puzzled at his remark.
"It is quite acceptable to for the women to be…aggressive, " started Lt. Cadman, trying to pick her words carefully. "A man who is not married or chosen as a consort, is free to be courted and seduced if a woman is interested. Once he accepts someone's advances, he belongs to her."
"You mentioned the attention Dr. McKay and Dr. Zelenka received," began Elizabeth, her curiosity a little piqued and although she wouldn't admit it, more than a little fascinated, in a thoroughly unprofessional capacity.
"Lt. Cadman told the chieftess that Dr. Beckett belonged to her, which gave her quite a bit of power, in the Diosans eyes. Apparently 'owning a healer' is valuable. She was the one they chose to negotiate with," Teyla continued serenely, choosing to ignore the color rising on various faces. Elizabeth looked at the lieutenant who blushing slightly, but smiling proudly. Carson, however, almost matched the color of her usual shirt.
Before she could ask the next question, Colonel Sheppard glowered, "Apparently, Major Lorne here is a good cook, and Ronon is 'exotic' and well, several women wanted him to be their personal bodyguard." Ronon looked almost pleased.
"And you," her words resulting in several moments of very awkward silence. After several moments of various glances being shot back and forth, Lt. Cadman spoke.
"Colonel Sheppard was ignored, ma'am. They thought he was too pretty and delicate. They were afraid he'd get hurt easily and didn't want to break him, I think were the words used." Again everyone was silent.
"I expect your mission reports by the end of the day," stated Elizabeth, adjourning the meeting. She bit her lip until everyone was gone, finally bursting into laughter until tears were streaming down her face. There was a place in the Pegasus galaxy immune to the spiky hair and flyboy, cocky charms of one John Sheppard, where he could go and be ignored. That must be some sort of record or violation of the laws of the universe.
Diosa means goddess in Spanish.
"Ain't backward about being forward," is Australian slang for someone who isn't shy (usually describing a girl)