"Boy, we must be getting really old," Han mused as he slouched in his pilot seat. "I mean, it's chapter 4 and we haven't even gotten out of the ship yet."

"Well, I guess we should be going." Leia said as she continued to knit.
"Hey," Han said, "you've been knitting for over 30 years now, what are you making?"
"A blanket for the ship." she said matter-of-factly.
Han bellowed with laughter. "You're kidding!" Han stopped laughing. "Right?"
Leia looked surprised. "No, what do you think of purple on yellow?" she asked as she held out the cloth for him to examine.
"Let's get out of here." Han said as he (carefully) got up and left the ship.

Later as they wandered the planet...

The four companions heard a piercing yell. It sounded like what a chicken would if it's foot was stepped on.
"Let's go see what's wrong." said Luke who clutched his cane for dear life.
"Got nuthin' better to do." Han stated.

They made their way through the crowd and saw what none them had ever dreamed(well, ok maybe some of them had had nightmares about it) to see. A 12 foot tall chicken. With white, mangled, dirty feathers and an earing. The thing stood head and shoulders above everything. Venom dripped from it beak. "Um, is there, uh, a problem, uh, ma'am?" Han asked meekly.
/YOU BET THERE IS FLY-BOY/ it screeched. Han had just noticed the huge gun that it held in one wing.

/THAT JERK DOWN THERE STEPPED ON MY FOOT/ the angry chicken stabbed a feather covered finger in the direction of a smug looking teenager.

"Well, she was going to mutate me!" the boy shouted.
/WAS NOT/ the chicken yelled.
"WERE TOO!" the boy yelled back.
/WAS NOT/
"WERE TOO!"
/SHUDUP/ bellowed the unmistakable voice of Chewie.
They shutup.
"Who are you?" Han asked the enraged chicken.
/I, you stupid little excuse of a bug, am FEE FEE THE MUTANT/

Dun Dun Dun

"Cut that out goldenrod!" Han yelled in the direction of the offending robot.
"Sorry."

/Anyway, now that I have been offended be this little flyboy I shall turn him into a mutant!
MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...is that enough evil laughing/ The bolt from her mutant gun penetrated Han's chest. Nothing happened.

"Sorry," Leia said, "but he's already as ugly as he's going to get"

Han attempted to do his chararistic shrug but he popped out his shoulder.
Oh well, Han thought, I'll just smirk. However, in trying to do so his dentures fell out. Han scrambled around trying to find them. He couldn't find them, because he was half-blind. As he was doing this Luke jumped out from behind them, lightsaber ready. He did a Jedi flip and began to battle furiously with the chicken(who was having no trouble slapping him out of her way). Luke grabbed a rope and flung it around her neck. He proudly began to drag her away.

"Ya' gonna take her to jail?" asked Han, who had found his dentures.
"Nope, she is going to be my pet!" Luke said happily.
/NO WAY/ the chicken bellowed. /I WOULD RATHER GO TO JAIL/
"Now, calm down," Luke counseled, "You can live with me and I will teach you all about the Force and..."
Luke's voice trailed off into the distance as Han wrapped his arm around Leia (not in an affectionate way but to remain upright). Han adjusted his dentures and smiled at Leia. "All's well that ends well?" Han asked her sweetly.
"Yeah, I guess, anyway, what do you think of having another kid?" Leia asked hopefully.
Han's eyes went back in his head and he fainted.
Chewie looked around and grumbled; /I think Luke made off with my newspaper! #$&#$/

The End

Jasmine Larson