Sentiments of gip-k: -Heyo, everyone! My sincerest apologies for the horridly slow update. _ My life has been really insane. I'm currently writing this chapter in the middle of the night. Yeah. I'm telling, because I'll be able to look back and remember what was happening when I wrote this. ^_^
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Disclaimer: I don't own Ruroken, but it'd be quite nice if I did.
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---Chapter 2: At the Dojo---
An hour or so later, all of the inhabitants of the dojo were sitting down in a small circle, sipping green tea and discussing the events of the day with Tokio.
"So… what is your farm like, Miss Saito? Who helps you manage it?" Kaoru asked conversationally as she poured Yahiko another cup of tea.
Tokio waved her hand in dismiss as she swallowed down her tea.
"It's doing perfectly nicely up in the mountains," Tokio said. "I grow some small amounts of rice, and lots of vegetables. Goats do well there- I have quite a few." Then Tokio picked up her teacup again, and spoke to Misao without even raising her eyes to her. "Please bring me some more of those delicious rice balls, child."
Misao fumed, and stalked off without a word.
"Now as I was saying-"
"Misao don't like being called a child," Yahiko interrupted, smirking. Then his eyes turned a little wide. "You know she's the leader of the Oniwabanshu, right lady?"
"Don't interrupt me while I am talking, Myoujin-boy!" Tokio said, glaring daggers at Yahiko over the edge of her cup. "And I go by 'Miss Saito.' Haven't you gotten any manners, you little toad?"
"Um, Yahiko, please go up to the kitchen and get some sugar, please!" Kaoru said through her display of teeth that could be formally called a smile. "Now." She added under her breath.
Yahiko licked his tongue out at Tokio, then ran to the kitchen. Kaoru exhaled.
"My apologies for Yahiko's behavior-"
"No need for apologies," Tokio said. Her green eyes danced for a moment before being again replaced by her serious look. "You asked who helped me with my farm? It's the boy who Hajime sent to live with me, Eiji." Tokio's eye twitched. "Stupid man! He's always dumping everything on cheerful little Tokio, with all his cursed smiles and…"
Tokio's voice trailed off as soon as Misao brought back the rice balls. She bent to put them down, and Tokio spoke.
"No, no!" Tokio scolded. "Your posture is all wrong!"
Misao froze, and blinked at their guest.
"Pardon?" she asked in a mousy voice.
Tokio sighed, and abruptly stood. She gently put her hands around Misao's waist, and bent her in a different way then took Misao's arm, straightening it out a little. She told Misao to put the plate down correctly now. She snapped at the girl again.
"No, no!" Tokio said. "Bend your legs not your back! You'll be crippled by the time you're in your thirties at that rate!"
Misao obeyed, though her face was the picture of disbelief and half-hidden scorn. She squatted down this time, bending her knees rather than reaching way over.
"Very good," Tokio said curtly.
Misao stayed in that position even after she had set down the plate of rice balls, blinking at Tokio.
"You may stand," Tokio said, regarding the girl with stern green eyes.
Misao straightened up quickly, and blinked all at everything. Then she walked, stumbling about like a goose, until finally she broke off into a run and escaped into the sanity and serenity of the great out doors.
Yahiko laughed aloud.
"You taught her one good!" he said, barely able to contain his laughter.
Tokio pretended to look very serious for a moment, and looked down her nose at the boy, but as she received more tea from Kaoru, and Sanosuke reached for a rice ball, she found it safe to wink at the boy. Yahiko put on a monkey grin. Kaoru whapped him hard on the head with her hand.
"I am tired," Tokio said, yawning.
Kenshin, who had been sitting down quietly on one of the mats saying not a word, suddenly jumped up.
"Would you like me to prepare a bath for you, Miss Saito?" Kenshin said with a warm smile. "My pardons, but I would have to cut some wood fire the furnace, that I would. My pardons, if it takes longer than milady might- erhm- desire."
Surprisingly, Tokio put on a crooked smile as she looked up at Kenshin.
"Certainly," she said. "That would be nice." She chuckled. "But only if you promise me you'll do no peaking or anything perverted like that, Mr. Himura."
Kenshin almost fell down. His cheeks turned bright crimson.
"N- n- no- no mi- mi- mi-lady!" Kenshin said. Then he ran off in a similar way as Misao.
Kaoru's eyes turned into dark blue coals. Yahiko, who had finally stopped rubbing his head and glaring at Kaoru, spoke up.
"Hey lady, I guess you probably want to see your room," Yahiko said. He stood up, and jerked his thumb backwards somewhere. "It's in the back kinda. I'll show 'ya. But only if you hurry up."
Tokio sighed and put her cup down. She turned to Kaoru momentarily, eyes speaking disapproval against Yahiko's manners.
"All right, boy," she said. "I'll come along."
Surprisingly, she put on another smile, linked arms with Yahiko- who looked slightly all too much pleased at that- and let herself be lead to her room.
Kaoru and Sanosuke, who happened to be the only ones left in the room, stared at each other in blatant disbelief. They exchanged expressions, and then nodded in unison.
At that very moment, Misao came storming back into the house.
"I hate her!" Misao fumed, face cherry red with anger and anguish. She paced the room. "She's the most horriblest lady I've ever met in my entire life!" Misao looked desperate. She knelt down on one of the mats closest to Kaoru, clutched Kaoru's wrists with her hands. "Oh Kaoru-chan you know I really, really don't want to have to go home early as I do love staying at your dojo so much, but Tokio Saito is the craziest woman I've ever meant and I simply can't tolerate her staying in the same place with me but you see I really, really want to stay in your dojo- really! -But I can't stand Tokio so can't you send her somewhere else?" Misao finally paused to suck in a long breath then ranted on as before. "Please Kaoru-chan please!"
"Shhh!" Kaoru said harshly. She turned her voice to a hushed whisper. "Calm down, Misao! Please hush your voice- she's here, you know."
"I'm sorry Kaoru-chan," Misao said dolefully, dropping her voice to a low whisper.
"All right-" Kaoru said. She sighed. "I don't really like Miss Saito too much, either," she turned back around to make sure the lady wasn't there. "But I simply can't turn down a guest, least of all Saito's own wife! Well, actually I can but- well, you know."
"It's his fault for bringing her here!" Misao exclaimed, her eyes roving over to Sanosuke. She let out a low growl in her throat. She jumped up, and then immediately without warning, tackled Sanosuke down and began attacking him with everything that was in her. Sanosuke was surprised at first but brought up his arms in defense just in time. Kaoru yelled at them to be quiet. Finally, Sanosuke caught Misao's arms and commenced trying to stop her from seriously injuring him. Then there was the sound of the door opening. Kaoru made a wild stumble over the room. She reached out and covered Misao's mouth with her hand. Sanosuke and Misao, both wide-eyed, froze in their positions. They all let out deep breaths at the sight of Kenshin.
"Oro!" he cried when he saw them. "What is happening I say?"
Kaoru took her hand away from Misao's mouth and flopped back down onto the ground. Misao wrested her arms away from Sanosuke's loosening grip and then sat down, as well. Sanosuke chose to stand up.
"We were talking about Miss Saito," Kaoru said.
"She's crazy!" Misao insisted.
A red blush filled Kenshin's cheeks.
"What're you blushing for you idiot?" Kaoru asked.
"Um… well…" he began.
"She's a pretty woman, Kaoru, even though she's pretty old," Sanosuke said with a wry grin. "I don't agree with the fact that she's crazy…the dragon girl is just a little…" Sanosuke shrugged. "She's a little confusing, I guess."
Kaoru apparently hadn't heard the last part, but was now glaring at Kenshin.
"Kenshinisthattrue? Areyouthatf***ingpervycauseifyouareyouknowEXACTLYwhatthehellhappens!" Kaoru said through gritted teeth.
"Well, she is very beautiful, and I believe Saito is very fortunate to have such a wife-"
Kaoru didn't wait for another word. Kenshin was all "oro" and screaming out in pain before he could finish the sentence with his customary "I say" or "that he does".
"Damn, Little Missy, stop that. It was just a little phrase," Sanosuke said through a mischievous smile. "Missy!"
Right at that moment, Yahiko entered the room.
"Hey Kenshin, Tokio's ready to take her bath now, so you'd better make sure the water is hot," Yahiko said.
"Oro!" Kenshin cried. "I'm afraid that Miss Kaoru has a tight grip on me and I can't seem to escape-EEEE!"
Kaoru was now biting Kenshin's head. Sanosuke and Yahiko looked at each other for a moment, and then both of them grabbed one of Kaoru's arms each and wrested her away from Kenshin. Kenshin, all swirly-eyed and "oro" tried to get up and flee but instead ended up falling down face flat on the ground. Kaoru finally calmed down, but was breathing extremely hard, face red with anger as she glared down at a now limp Kenshin.
"He deserved it!" Misao piped in.
She then proceeded to glare at everyone in the room, or rather, just Yahiko, Kenshin, and Sanosuke, then she patted Kaoru's arm.
"Come on, Kaoru-chan, they're not worth it," Misao said, sniffing quite arrogantly. Then she and Kaoru linked arms and began their very stiff-backed and arrogant stalking out of the room, and Misao looked behind once on the way to lick her tongue out at them. Yahiko took both of his hands and put them to the corner of his mouth, stretching it out, and letting his tongue waggle back at them while making his eyes big and ugly. Luckily, by that time, Misao's back was turned again.
"Need a little help getting up, shrimp?" Sanosuke asked amusedly.
"That would be very nice appreciated, I say," Kenshin said, moaning in pain. Sanosuke helped him up, and then Yahiko spoke up in a disgusted tone.
"Women!" he yelled. "The whole lot of 'em's just a whole big bunch of hags and uglies like Kaoru! But Kaoru's the worst of 'em all!"
"I wouldn't put it like that, exactly," Kenshin added in an abashed voice. He seemed to be recovering a little bit.
"So, Kenshin, what was that about Saito's girl being pretty, eh?" Sanosuke said, grinning as he jabbed Kenshin hard in the side. Kenshin let out a grunt, and doubled over. He coughed a bit, then straightened himself.
"Tokio Saito is Saito's wife, not my own, I say," Kenshin said very seriously. "It would be improper to speak of her in any such manner, that it would."
Yahiko snorted.
"Well, yeah whatever," he said. "She's probably the only woman in the world that's not a hag, though, I'll tell you that much."
"She's a real something else," Sanosuke said, taking an old fishbone out of his pocket to put in his mouth. "A real dragon girl- I've never seen one like here. I mean, the missy's weird enough, but Tokio Saito's just beyond weird."
All three of the males nodded in unison.
"Well, Kenshin, if I were you I'd go make sure the furnace is as hot as possible," Sanosuke said. "Who knows what dragon girl might do if you do it wrong."
"Oro! I thank you for reminding me, I say," Kenshin said. Then he looked slightly frightened, and studied the ground for a moment. "I should not hope to find out anytime soon, that I don't."
Then Kenshin dashed out of the room. Sanosuke and Yahiko looked at each other.
"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Yahiko asked.
"Yeah," Sanosuke replied.
"Okay," Yahiko said. "On the count of three let's do it," he replied. "One…two…! Hey you bastard -!"
Sanosuke began running to the kitchen ahead of Yahiko. Yahiko was hot on his trail…
…They both wanted the last piece of fish.
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gip-k's Post Chapter Statements: -I finally finished this chapter! Goodness gracious! -_- That took an awful long time. Yeesh. I've been writing that for weeks. @_@ #_#
Well, here come my special thanks!
Hikari Suki Chi
Hey, thanks for your review! ^_^ Also thanks for telling me about that error- as you can see, it's all fixed now. Thanks!
Imalefty
Thank you for your reviews, as well! I'm glad everyone enjoyed this so much and thought it was so funny. I did see that you told me about Saito and Tokio, too, and also Eiji! Thanks a lot for that. I can't say two people are wrong, now can I? Thanks again!
Jouko-chan
I'm glad you liked it! I hope you find this chapter funny, as well. :D I tried to make it funny, but I hope it didn't turn out downright crazy.
lalaland
Your name screen name is so disturbingly cute! XD Thanks for your review! You were my first reviewer- thanks a lot for picking out my story to read. ^_^ You were also the first to tell me about Saito and Tokio and all that- thanks for that, too!
Crazed Fanatic Anime Fan
Hello! I recognize you as one of my veteran reviewers! O_O I think you probably read all of my stories, except for that Legend of Zelda Poetry. Or did you read that, too? Well thanks again for your review! I really liked it. Did you really find the story that funny?
FHB
Thank you for your review! I'm glad you liked this one. ^_^ It's meant to be really funny- there won't be any angst this time, and of course, Yahiko is alive! ^_^ I surely hope you enjoy this chapter, too. It's a little crazy, but I guess sometimes that's okay, ne?
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