Chapter Four- The War Begins
At Bowser's request, a third of the Koopa fighting force left the castle in a rush. The serenity of the Mushroom Kingdom holiday was shattered; every animal that had been enjoying the stillness of the countryside was sent into hiding as several hundred Koopa soldiers scrambled down the path toward Toad Town. Dust clouds were formed so high that they were visible from across the mountains. The tremors caused by the running army were so great that even a sleeping person in the city could feel them.
But as the army descended into Toad Town, the serenity returned to the countryside. Dust resettled, birds returned to their trees, rabbits gradually came back to the flowers. It was when this peace had newly grown that a green pipe appeared from the ground by the castle. A strange whooshing sound echoed from the depths of the pipe; then with a shout, the red-clad Mario came leaping from the opening. The pipe disappeared as soon as the plumber hit the ground.
The trip in the warp pipe was disorienting; Mario took a moment or so to gather his bearings. As he did so, a Lakitu circled overhead with a flashing video camera. He spoke into a headset as he struggled to keep Mario's image centered and in focus.
"Good afternoon. This is Lakitu-1 reporting live from the castle," he said. Of course, it wasn't really live. He didn't have the equipment necessary to transmit the video feed to any television station. And besides, he would have to edit the boring parts out later. "Mario has just arrived on the scene. For those who are not up-to-date, Mario has just returned from a four-month-long journey, in which he and his brother were supposed to retrieve Power Stars. Now that he's back, it appears some Koopas have followed on his heels! We'll follow Mario into the castle, where he is sure to uncover more of this strange series of events. More as this develops." His monologue thus completed, Lakitu-1 settled on a position behind Mario that he judged was far enough.
Mario, meanwhile, took no notice of all this. He was still blinking at the castle, squinting as the sun reflected off the giant stained-glass window above the front door. Mario always considered himself a humble man, so he felt shame at what he was thinking. Yet he couldn't shake the feeling that something was not right. He had just arrived from a long, important journey. Why was no one out here to greet him?
"It's a holiday," he reminded himself aloud. "It's probably against the law to be outside, or something."
He ran down the path, crossing the cobblestone bridge until he was at the front door. There, he prepared himself for a possible surprise party by adjusting his suspenders, wiping the lint from his shirt, and taking a very deep breath. He opened the door and stepped inside. Behind him, very stealthily, Lakitu-1 followed with his video camera.
Inside, there was no surprise party. In fact, there was no one at all. The sound of the door shutting behind him echoed in the foyer. It suddenly occurred to him why the emptiness of the front lawn seemed so strange. The royal guard, which was always on duty, wasn't there.
"Hello?" Mario called.
His echo replied: "Hello?"
He listened for another response. Then he called, "Is anyone home?"
Then a voice came drifting from the depths of the castle. It sounded like his echo at first, but it was deeper, and spoke forcefully.
"Welcome. Nobody's home. Now, scram… and don't come back!"
Mario raised an eyebrow. Such a harsh greeting meant that something definitely was amiss. He took a wary step into the foyer, and then his greatest fear began to materialize before his eyes. The specter appeared to be Toad, but was transparent and flickering like a bad television signal.
"Mario!" the specter called, its voice faint. "Mario! Can you hear me?"
Mario blinked at the vision. Words failed him. Suddenly he blurted, "I can hear you."
"Oh, good!" said the Toad specter. "Thank goodness you came, Mario! Bowser just… well, somehow he just walked into the castle with no warning!"
Mario swallowed. He balled his fists and glanced around the empty foyer. "Bowser's here?" he said quietly.
"He seems to have gone," Toad replied. "But… oh, it's awful. He took the Power Stars! Now, I am… well, all of us are… trapped inside the castle walls, the Princess included. I think he got Luigi and Yoshi as well. You must do something, Mario! You're our last hope!"
"Where did Bowser go?" Mario demanded. The severity of the situation was bearing down on him like a bag of coins. His heart pounded and sweat formed on his brow. "How am I supposed to find him?"
"I don't know for sure," Toad said, shaking his head sadly. "All I know is, he found a way to get into the castle quickly, and he definitely has a way of quickly getting out. I think he plans to use the Power Stars to help him win the war. As to where he could have gone, I don't know. The castle is totally deserted."
Mario glanced around the room a second time, looking for secret entrances. He couldn't believe it. How could an entire army sneak into the castle? It was surrounded by a wall and a moat. There was a royal guard dedicated to watching for intruders. How could Bowser's army take everyone by surprise? Furthermore, how could Bowser arrive with such short notice that Peach wouldn't even have time to go into her secret underground shelter? He felt like he was in a nightmare, where everything that was supposed to be going right was inexplicably going wrong.
"There is one thing," Toad said, apparently noticing the anxiety in Mario's eyes. "Bowser had his minions cast spells on various walls and paintings in the castle. You may find a clue there."
Mario nodded. Then he asked, "But Toad, how are you communicating… like this?"
Toad smiled. "I hope this will answer your question," he said. Then the specter disappeared, and in his place was a shining beacon of hope, a Power Star.
Mario slowly approached the shimmering Star. He had seen Power Stars hundreds of times before, but not in a situation like this. He shook his head. It just didn't seem possible that the work of years of searching was suddenly undone. Again, the idea of a surprise party, a terribly cruel prank, came to him. In any case, he needed confirmation. He grabbed the Star and placed it in his back pocket.
He wandered the foyer, trying various doors but finding them all locked. There was a strange symbol on the locks. It appeared to be a Star with a roman numeral engraved on it. Utterly confused and about to lose all hope, he tried one last door, on the castle's east side. Seeing the strange symbol over the knob, he prepared himself for the worst. Then, to his surprise, the symbol disappeared with a flash. He blinked twice, and then tried the knob again. It turned easily, allowing him to push the door open and enter the room.
In the room, Mario felt a strange sort of disappointment. It had formerly been an art gallery, but there was only one painting left. There were no other doors. Then he remembered what Toad had said. This painting, it seemed, could serve as a link in his search for answers. With a hoot, he leapt into the center of the room.
The painting was large, covering most of the wall. It was oil on canvas, colorful yet aged, and surrounded by a beautiful golden frame. The label underneath read "March of the Bombs," followed by the late artist's name. Indeed, the painting showed a line of Bobombs up close, marching to some unknown doom and extraordinarily detailed. Mario was no art critic, but he felt sure that this was a very fine piece.
Then why did Bowser's looters leave this one behind?
Warily, Mario stepped forward, anticipating some attack, even though the room was clearly empty. Up close, he could see minute details in the paint, scratches, and dust specks. There was nothing that looked like the work of some Koopa's spell. But he couldn't be sure; he was unfamiliar with the painting. Unsure of what else to do, he lifted his finger to touch it.
When the smooth surface of his glove touched the rough surface of the canvas, there was an unexpected reaction. The entire painting trembled like a pool of liquid. Then with a cry, Mario felt himself sucked into the painting, past the oil and canvas and into another world entirely, where he was sure to get his confirmation.
When a lone Parabeetle scout spotted the Bobomb army from his perch on the floating island, he forwarded the news without haste. Soon, every last soldier in the Red Bobomb Division of the Mushroom Army was aware of the intruders. The captain gathered his troops in the central trench and let them know the division's options. There weren't many. The RBD was a sort of "kamikaze" portion of the army, designed to illustrate passive resistance. Normally, they were ordered to simply march on their enemy. Then, when the enemy fires cannons or uses fireflowers, the Red Bobombs would ignite and proceed to decimate the enemy with its own firepower. This time, things were different. Both sides were primarily composed of Bobombs. The implications were staggering. In the best scenario, both sides would be destroyed, totally ruining the landscape in a matter of hours.
In a rather hopeful move, the captain decided it would be best to hold off the intruders as long as possible. He sent the Parabeetle scout to warn the Mushroom Kingdom of the invaders. Once the scout was gone, the captain ordered his troops to set up a line of opposition along the first trench. Once the intruders were near, Red Bobombs toward the back began hurtling massive boulders down slopes especially designed for such a use. The intruders began to whistle in distress. The boulders ran among them, crushing all who came in their way. Pieces of black iron flew about in the air, settling among the first line of Red Bobombs.
Crouching behind the barrier of compact dirt and barbed wire, a Red Bobomb recruit named Rob watched curiously as bits of dirt and hot metal sprayed the defensive line. His superior officer stood attentive, listening as the unseen enemy scuttled about the grassy field, assembling into an offensive position. A retaliation attack would come soon. The superior officer turned toward Rob and scowled.
"Remember, boys!" he roared. "Once your fuse is lit, you go charging into the enemy lines, no questions asked!"
"Sure thing, Sarge!" Rob said. He turned around and, with his back turned, performed the biggest eye roll of his life. "I don't believe this. You know, I'm sure there are more glorious ways of fighting than simply charging into the enemy and blowing yourself up."
His companion Bobomb, named Ike, tapped his foot, as if the sounds of exploding bombs and crashing boulders were catchy. "You know what they say," Ike said cheerfully. "If you're going to go out, go out with a bang!"
"I don't suppose there's an alternative," said Rob. He jumped as a hot piece of a black Bobomb landed near his feet. Part of the Bobomb's face could be seen on the smoldering hunk of metal. "Yikes. And if there is an alternative, now would be a great time to know what it is."
On the other side of the trenches, the Bobomb army fell into disarray as boulders came falling among them, seemingly out of nowhere. The Big Bobomb, however, was unconcerned. "War has come earlier than expected," he said, calmly twirling his mustache. "But it has come nonetheless, and that was our main goal. Fire up the cannons."
His trusty soldiers scurried to the wagons and quickly assembled the artillery. The smaller, more mobile cannons were dragged toward the front of the army, while the heavier artillery was set up and adjusted so it had a critical angle.
The Sarge jumped when he heard the first sound of a cannon going off. Everyone in the trench listened as the cannonball whizzed through the air, falling, falling, falling until it was spotted at last by one unlucky Red Bobomb, who just so happened to be right underneath it when it fell to the ground.
Incendiary collided with incendiary; hot metal collided with cold. The first casualty in the RBD indeed went out with a bang. The explosion flowed through the trench and lit up the air; a moment later, there was a blanket of smoke covering the portion of the trench where eight Red Bobombs had been ignited by their own kinsmen's explosion. They ran about madly, following crisscrossing paths with just enough sanity left in them to hear the Sarge's commands. At the words "Charge the enemy lines!" they scurried over the trench wall, and were gone from sight. All those below listened as eight distinct bangs sounded on the other side of the trench. The enemy was more chaotic than ever. Many black Bobombs had certainly been destroyed.
Rob danced about, avoiding the falling debris that was still hot enough to light his fuse. There was another boom, foreshadowing the fall of another cannonball. Three more, then five more followed. There were explosions all around him, some of them igniting his fellow recruits who then ran bravely over the trench wall into their doom.
A moment of silence briefly dominated the warm air, interrupted by a single cannon shot. The cannonball landed close to the trench wall, exploding in the Sarge's face. He sat up and shook the soot off his face, while the fuse atop his head fizzled brightly. He was apparently dazed, the implications just forming together in his mind. Then, when it hit him, he cursed loudly and leapt forward. He exploded just as he crested the wall, ripping a breach in the dirt and sending coils of barbed wire into the air like writhing snakes. Rob was buried up to his face in fresh dirt. But when he shook himself free, he felt a bit of happiness in spite of himself.
On the other side, the Big Bobomb did not take long to figure out that his current strategy was not working. "The Mushroom Kingdom has a Bobomb army of its own?" he wondered aloud, much to the worry of his second-in-command. "How coincidental! Well, no matter. No military strategist ever leaves home without a Plan B, wouldn't you know. It's time we break out the… ho, ho… water bombs."
At a nod, his troops went to the stores and opened up the first case of 'water bombs,' or gelatin orbs. They picked up as many of these glistening blue spheres as they could, and then took them to the cannons. After a bit of explanation, they handed the gelatin over to the artillerymen, and returned for more.
The silence was broken again. Rob listened to the familiar sound of whistling cannonballs, and braced himself for the worst. Then, he watched with horror as a cannonball came straight for Ike! He let out a yell, but when the ball collided, he found that he could not have expected anything like this. There was no explosion; Ike was simply knocked back. When he stopped moving, Rob came to his side and saw that his entire body was covered with dripping, clear goop.
"Are you all right?" Rob asked.
"I think so," said Ike with a groan. "Boy, what a hit! I think that rock I landed on did more damage than the cannonball. Say, what's all this?"
"I don't know. But it doesn't look good. I'd better go tell the captain!"
No sooner had Rob turned away than the sound of a true cannonball filled the air. Rob looked to the sky, and among the flying spheres of gelatin, he spotted the ominous black shapes, now coming at a greater frequency. Dirt erupted all around him, leaving hundreds of smoldering craters all around the trench. He made a dash for it, but in his path was a gelatin-drenched Bobomb, panicking and crying for help. A cannonball landed squarely on the Bobomb's head. Rob squeezed his eyes shut and braced himself for the explosion, wondering briefly how the end could have possibly come so soon.
But there was no explosion; the Bobomb simply shattered. The high-strung Rob fell over backwards. When he recovered, he realized that something was wrong. He approached the landing site of the cannonball, where there was hardly a crater. Red fragments circled the landing site, all held together by a mass of the transparent goo.
"So that's what the gelatin does," Rob wondered aloud. "It must be some sort of non-flammable material that turns all bombs into duds!"
There was a sudden commotion at the trench wall behind him. A massive Chomp had literally chewed through dirt and metal until the breach created by the Sarge was now wide enough for the entire enemy army. Barking with excitement, the Chomp bounced through the trench, knocking down sentries and gobbling up red Bobombs in its wake. The red Bobombs, most of whom were drenched in the gelatinous substance, were screaming with terror and scattering without rhyme or reason. Total chaos seized the troops. Only Rob had the sense to look up at the trench wall and see that the black Bobombs, lead by a massive bomb with a crown and a mustache, were walking into the trench with ease.
"Retreat!" he shrieked, running in tight circles. "Retreat! Retreat! Everyone retreat!"
There were few who followed him, but it was more than he was aware of. As soon as he uttered the order (despite having no significant rank), he turned tail and dashed away. He heard the frantic barks of a second Chomp, which had spotted something and was bouncing toward it. When Rob felt the thuds rock the ground, he realized with a sickening feeling that the Chomp was after him. He let out another shriek and ran faster, but it would be of no use. In another moment, the Chomp would be upon him.
But there was an explosion, and this time, it saved his life. The explosion caught the Chomp on the underside and blew away half its mass. Its body made a trio of spectacular flips before it came crashing to the ground, ripping up half a ton of turf. Rob shot a glance at the smoking mass of dead metal and wondered if the explosion had been Ike in a brave attempt to save his friend's life. Rob would never know for sure, but he liked to believe it, because he would never see Ike again.
He arrived at the top of the hill in a matter of minutes. He quickly summarized the current situation to the captain, who decided it would be best to fortify the hill and fight to protect it.
Ordinarily, the hill would be a superb strategic point. It was very steep, with only one path leading to the top that wound around the entire circumference of the hill. But there was one problem: they had no cannons. Nevertheless, they fought madly for hours, hurling as many boulders down the hill as their numbers could manage. But the loss was inevitable. The enemy was too numerous, and its weapons were too powerful. After much pleading from his underlings, the captain finally decided to abandon the hill. He and his remaining soldiers scrambled down the backside, evading the enemy's cannonballs as they found the last place they could possibly fortify. They counted themselves lucky in one aspect; the enemy had forgotten a single cannon there. The captain ordered his troops to build a wall as quickly as they could, while he tried to figure out how exactly to work the cannon without setting his own fuse off.
"Captain! Look!" Rob cried.
Everyone looked to the sky. There, they saw the unimaginable: a flying ship! To their dismay, the remaining RBD troops could hear the exuberant cheers of the enemy Bobombs on the other side of the hill. This was it. Their fate had finally been sealed.
It wasn't exactly what they had expected. No cannonballs rained down on them from the flying ship. Rather, an entire regiment of Goombas and Koopa Troopas were being parachuted to the battlefield, to complete the victory. Rob looked past the tumbling Koopa soldiers at the hill, where the rotund form of the Big Bobomb was visible. That sight made him realize that the entire Mushroom Kingdom, not just the RBD, was certainly doomed.
It was at that moment when Mario arrived.
When Mario found himself tumbling into another world, he found himself smack-dab in the middle of a war zone. It was a field not unlike the fields surrounding the Mushroom Castle, yet craters and trenches interrupted its tranquil beauty. There were puffs of smoke and distant thunderclaps, a sign of heavy artillery. He touched down without a clue as to how to get himself to safety. There were bombs everywhere. In fact, it seemed that all this battle entailed were bombs!
Mario felt a heavy object thump him in the head. With a shout, he dived into the ground and rolled into attack position. He had a gut feeling that the object that hit him was a bomb. But though it was a bomb, the collision did not appear to be hostile. The red Bobomb lay where it landed with its face in the dirt and its legs waving wildly in the air. It pulled itself out, shook the dirt off its face, and stared at Mario with two white, blinking eyes.
"You there!" chirruped the Bobomb, apparently without an apology, "You'd better watch out! If you wander around here, you're liable to get plastered by a water bomb! Err, that's what I think they are, anyway. Say, what are you doing out here? We're fighting a really nasty battle right now!"
"To be honest, I don't know," said Mario. He ducked as a nearby hill exploded from an impacting cannonball. "I entered some sort of portal in a painting at the Mushroom Castle. It took me all the way out here."
The Bobomb appeared puzzled. "The Mushroom Castle? Why would there be a portal…" Suddenly, it hit him. "Oh, no. So the castle has been taken? This is bad. This is very bad."
"How in the world do you know about the castle?" Mario cried. "Who are you, and why aren't you trying to blow me up?"
The red Bobomb's mood changed all of a sudden. He jumped and did a little bow. "Private Rob of the Red Bobomb Division at your service!" he said cheerfully. "But you can call us Bobomb Buddies, if you'd like. We're on your side. And apparently, we're the only ones keeping this army of evil black Bobombs at bay."
Mario looked out at the battlefield, where the air was hazy with smoke. Halfway down the field, there was a very tall, and very steep, hill. Atop this hill, he noticed, was a flag bearing the symbol of the Koopa Clan. Suddenly, an idea occurred to him. "I came here looking for the missing Power Stars," he said to Rob. "And I think that this may be a place where I can find some. Do you have any ideas?"
Rob thought about it for a moment, and then turned to look at the hill. "You see that hill?" he said. "On top of it is the Big Bobomb. He's the king of the enemy army, and one of Bowser's main minions. If Bowser had the Power Stars, he'd almost certainly give some to him for safekeeping. We Bobomb Buddies can't go and try and retake the hill, because a single spark can set us off! Besides, none of us is really very athletic. But you… you look like you'd be able to handle yourself out there."
Mario squinted at the sky. "Just run to the top of that hill, huh?" he said.
"Yep!" said Rob. "But, ah, remember. Watch your step!"
"Can do."
Mario turned and spotted a path that ran straight through the middle of the fray. He kicked the dirt, adjusted his red cap, and took off running.