As Chloe purposefully pushes her way through the market's chaotic crowd, she summons more resolve by the moment. She always envisioned this throw down taking place against Lana; a battle she felt more than comfortable in handling. She felt confident in assuming that anyone who stocks their closet full of Barbie pink certainly couldn't have much power behind their punch, and so she didn't lose much sleep worrying about taking Lana down. The fact that it was her own cousin who crossed the line of Clarkdom, much less one who had a great deal of military training behind her, were both things that were giving Chloe pause. Yet, regardless of their blood relation, that ponytail clad, too-tight tank top wearing minx knew better than to flirt with the flannel wearing farm boy, and she did it anyway. In typical Lois fashion, she bullied her way into a place she didn't belong, and for that she was going down. She had to go down. Lois may be packing some militaristic moves, but Chloe has brains, and nothing lit Chloe's pilot light like someone messing with her man.
The elder Kents feverishly battle the fire, as Chloe quickly sneaks by them. Clark and Lois were making their way towards the market exit, and if she was going to catch them, she was going to have to move fast. Yet, when they finally come in to view she can't help but see that Clark is holding Lois' hand. She wants to scream, throw things, run over to Lois and kick her ass; but that wouldn't help her win Clark's affection. If she's going to win this battle, she needs to get Clark to combust over her. She has to fight fire with fire.
Not wanting to veer too far off the warpath, she stops at the closest booth to her, which just so happens to be perfect for her cause. "I'll take one of these," Chloe says snatching up her own form of ammunition off the table, balling it up and tossing it under her arm before anyone can see. She quickly throws down a five dollar bill, then charges full steam ahead towards her destination.
Breathless, Chloe catches up with Clark and Lois, ready for the battle royale. However, in her haste she did not see Lois frantically trying to break free from Clark's massive grip. He may have wanted to engage in a little fun, but Lois did not. However, from Chloe's perspective, it very much appears the opposite.
"Hey Clark!" Chloe shouts from behind them, instantly striking her best sexy pose. She primps, placing her hand on her hip and shifting her weight to the opposite side. It's actually not that bad of a job. It's just too bad that Clark and Lois didn't hear her, and aren't looking her way.
"Clark!" Chloe screams again, a shrill shriek that gets everyone's attention. She rubs her throat, having just strained it, but recovers in time to find her sexy pose again.
Clark and Lois turn together, both staring at Chloe. Instantly they see something different in her face. If they didn't know better, they could easily jump to the conclusion that somewhere among the peaches and corn stalks, Chloe had come across some moonshine.
Chloe closes the short distance between she and Clark with a feline slink so out of character for her cousin, that it injects Lois with a temporary case of laryngitis. Clark, knowing Chloe all too well, senses a trick, and is not impressed. Not even in his Red-K induced state.
"Chloe, wouldn't you really rather--" Chloe's fingertip brushes his lips to shut him up.
"It really is hot out here, isn't it Clark?" Chloe asks, wrapping her arms up around his neck, trying her best to purr in a seductive tone, but failing miserably. "Are you hot, Clark?" she asks, running her finger across his lips again. Unfortunately her determined enthusiasm doesn't caress his skin softly. Instead, she rakes the finger across his cheek, pulling his cheeks forward and slapping them back with a spit filled splat.
Her eye twitches as she realizes that she's overplaying her role, but she finds some dignity buried deep, deep inside and manages to continue.
Lois stands wide eyed, seriously wondering what sort of crazy product they spray the produce with around this place because apparently Clark and Chloe had inhaled a little too much.
"Chloe, what in the heck is the matter with you?" Lois asks, pulling Chloe's hand away from Clark's lips.
Chloe can't help but take Lois' protective motion as proof of her affection for Clark, thus fueling her more. She positions herself strategically under Clark's gaze, sucking on her finger, and coos, "Du yeww thenk ihm haawwt, Cwark?" her mouth full of finger.
"What?" Clark and Lois ask in unison, eyebrows arched in complete bewilderment, not understanding a single word she's saying.
"Du yeww thenk ihm haawwt, Cwark?" Chloe tries again, adding more purr this time.
"What is that? Klingon?" Lois queries.
"Ughh," Chloe sighs annoyingly, pulling her finger out of her mouth to better enunciate. "Do you think I'm hot, Clark? Gee, open your ears."
"Oh, I totally didn't get that the first time," Clark finally realizes.
Not getting the proper response, she feels it's time to up the ante. Chloe reaches over propositioning Clark by taking one of his fingers into her mouth. Such an act should be quite enticing, but in her naiveté her sucking comes off more like she's cleaning one of her own fingers slathered in sauce after eating a stack of barbecue ribs.
As if that site wasn't bizarre enough, she somehow finds a way to top her own follies of flirtation failure. With her combination of desperation and inexperience she finds herself shoving Clark's finger farther in her mouth, hoping by some miracle this act will turn him on, but all it really serves to do it set off her gag reflex leaving her wrenching like a bulimic after Thanksgiving dinner.
Lois is two inches away from complete and utter humiliation. The craziest part is Chloe, the one who should have already died of shame, doesn't seem to care, or even notice the fool she is making of herself. Lois can't understand what on Earth had possessed her cousin to start acting like such a freak, but it's going to end right now. "You know I didn't really want to see you taking up smoking considering you've already embraced high blood pressure inducing hobbies, but if you insist on sticking random items in your mouth, why don't you give cigarettes a go?" Lois says, pressing her hand down on Chloe's shoulder in a condescending mothering manner.
Clark doesn't know what to say. What can he say? Despite Chloe's apparent attempts to win him, it's obvious she would've had better luck before she started trying. Even though Chloe is ready to disown her cousin forever, Lois couldn't care less that she has Clark on a leash. Thanks to the red kryptonite every single snide comment Lois spews, Clark is excited further, yet she remains completely oblivious to that fact. The sad reality is that Chloe's losing a battle to someone who isn't even aware there's a fight.
Clark passes Lois a quick glance, motioning with his eyes he wants to leave the freak show. Chloe sees it, and realizes it's time for the big guns, and she just happens to have two big ones with Clark's name on them. Ready to play, she knocks Lois' hand off of her with a firm shrug of her shoulder. "Do you mind?" Chloe asks aggravated to her cousin's proximity to her. Oddly, Chloe's tone is strong enough to make Lois take a step back.
"You like big juicy peaches, don't you, Clark?" Chloe asks, glancing over at Lois' overly packed top, then defiantly starting to take her own off. Sadly for her even this simple task can not go easily. Chloe's now trapped in her own T-shirt, bound and spinning around like a patient at Belle Reve strapped in a straight jacket.
Even though Clark is very much like other guys his age, especially now in his uninhibited condition, he simply cannot get past the humor surrounding Chloe's would be seduction scene to enjoy her abundant cups that runneth over.
After struggling with her own shirt for what seemed like an eternity, Chloe frees herself from the binding cotton knit screeching "Owie", time and time again as her hair is ripped out by the roots in her haste. This ridiculous entanglement has left her short, cropped hair shooting straight up in what can only be described as a rooster-do. Despite the fact that she is now down to her bra, her whole strip tease proved anything but tempting. Maybe if she too was high on a drug, or perhaps had a parasite embedded in her head, she might actually be able to pull off this seduction. Sadly though, Chloe, without the aid of drugs and meteor rock leeches, fumbles like Charlie Brown kicking a football.
If you could say nothing else about Chloe Sullivan, you would have to concede that she is tenacious. Today her tenacity is the only thing keeping her from throwing in the towel and seeking solitude beneath her tear stained pillow. Finding renewed strength in her sheer desperation, and within the chills she gets from Clark's gorgeous blue-green eyes, she pulls out her balled up ammunition.
"Do you know what I like to do when it's hot and steamy like this?" Chloe asks, strumming her finger down her chest, actually capturing sultry with amazing sensuality. It seems that Clark has finally noticed Chloe's carnal fruits of pleasure she was kind enough to display before him. You can almost see him beginning to salivate. Later, Chloe would definitely be kicking her own butt over this next move, but she had mapped out her plan of attack in her mind. She did not take into account he might be hooked before her final step, and so she continues on. "I like to put on a tank top. A nice Itight/I one," Chloe adds, throwing Lois a snide glance, before returning her eyes to Clark's.
"Tight?" Clark confirms, running his eyes up and down her, hovering around her mid quadrant. "Tight is good."
Chloe smiles, not really getting his risqué inference, delighting under the delusion that he is finally caught in her trap.
"Tight can be very good," she assures him, putting on the balled up surprise she's been hiding; the impulse purchase tank top, also known as the spark to start Clark's fire. Yes, if Chloe was thinking clearly she would realize that covering up her exposed succulent bust with a tacky five dollar tank top was a bad choice, but it's evident Chloe's not thinking clearly. She is driven by the irrational idea that a tank top is the magic button to Clark's libido. Unfortunately she doesn't realize that it's her constant insecurity, and current ridiculousness that turns his switch off.
Lois rolls her head back and around, finally getting what Chloe is up to, and positions herself between Chloe and Clark.
"Okay, that's enough of that. It's no mystery what you're trying to do here, Cuz," Lois intones, rolling her eyes.
"What's the matter, Lois, can't stand a little competition?" Chloe snaps back.
"Competition?" Lois's confidence in herself gets in the way. The minute she says it she realizes how Chloe will take it, no matter how harmless she meant it.
"You don't think you and I can compete? Is that it? Or are you just worried that I figured out your little secret weapon," Chloe says defiantly, snapping the straps of her tank top.
"Don't you mean weapons? Plural?" Clark interjects, fueling the impending cat fight the best he can.
"Stay out of it, Pillsbury," Lois glares at Clark, but immediately returning her attention back to Chloe. "There's nothing secret about it."
"They stick out so far I guess it would be hard to keep them a secret. Which reminds me of something I was meaning to bring up. I don't remember your mom, or mine for that matter being quite so busty," Chloe smugly cocks an eyebrow with that zinger.
"I seriously hope you plan on regretting that later," Lois warns, an adversarial tone in her voice.
"The only thing I planned to do, is knock you down a bra size or two."
"At least I have the sizes to spare."
Clark folds his arms up to his chest, ready for the show.