Author's note: Ok, I know some of you are feeling a little confused. I have
prepared a short list of OOC in the story at the bottom, - if that would be
any of help to clear the confusion... Anyway, hope you like it!! Don't
forget to R & R!!
Disclaimer : None of Dee's past is based on the real story as
drawn in Sanami Matoh's FAKE. It's entirely imaginary. I-M-A-G-I-
N-A-R-Y!!
Chapter Six: "I should have...I could have..."
Tending to her master's request for her to join him in his study hall, Rikei had long left the man to reflect the matter on his own. Flexing his body inwardly towards the banister while resting his arms on the marble railings, Ryo propped up an arm to rest his chin on the back of his palm as his midnight-black eyes looked out into the azure-blue sky but his mind wandered far into a world of his own. Sighing with despondency weighing from the heart, his slender fingers raked through his blond tresses as thoughts swam across his messed-up mind.
'I thought I knew this man... I thought I knew all there is to know about him... but it seems that I am wrong to think that all this while as his partner/lover I would know this man completely, - because I don't... Pieces of information gained as the passing hours drift by gradually draw us apart, detaching every link I have for the man. The finer details supplemented by associates of his past contradicted with everything I know of the man...And I cannot discard the uncertainty felt within that I am slowly losing the man I love to a complete stranger...'
Soft knocks on his doors startled the occupied detective with a small jump.
"Come in," he called out.
"Good afternoon, Detective MacLean," said a man of his mid-twenties as he walked through the mahogany door with a tray of Darjeeling tea in his hand.
"Good afternoon..." Ryo replied hesitantly.
"I'm Master Dee's personal assistant, Thaddeus Theodore," self- introducing as he set the tray down on the coffee table out on the balcony with a warm smile.
"Or commonly known as Teddy," added a female voice mischievously, popping out form the man's back.
"Rikei!" Thaddeus exclaimed, startled by her mysterious appearance.
"Li Kay!!" she corrected irritably, "For the last time, Teddy... my name is Li Kay, not Rikei! Sheesh!!" slapping lightly on her forehead, "I don't know why I even bother to correct any of you anyway. It's not as if it will make any difference."
"I'll call you Li Kay if you promise not to call me Teddy anymore, agree?" Thaddeus said without looking at her as he continued pouring Ryo a cup of tea.
"That is totally out of the question! I've been calling you Teddy ever since the first day. You are practically asking me to break it out of my habit,"
"Look, Li Kay... I don't have time for this right now. Can't you see that I'm tending to the guest here?"
"And for a minute there I thought you've forgotten about your duty," added a stern voice from the shadow of the room as he stepped into the light.
"Master!" the two younger individuals in the room exclaimed with astonishment. "Dee!" exclaimed the blond officer nonetheless.
Fixating his dark green eyes on those two, he walked over to Thaddeus with annoyance written on his façade, "There is no need for the both of you to pretend. I may have been away for five years but that doesn't mean I don't know what goes around in this household. So, either you guys polish your act to make your bickering look real or quit the surreal act, or start doing what couples does. And to start with, go get yourself a room. I believe the manor have more than enough rooms for you to 'do' whatever you want," Dee said with a grin, causing the younger two blush in shades of dark crimson.
"Master!" Li Kay cried out embarrassedly.
"If you're done here, Li Kay, Madam Bouvier needs you in the kitchen... something about the mackerel being rotten. You left it unattended again, didn't you?" Dee said, hinting heavily on her mistake.
"Ah!! Jim!!" the nineteen-year-old girl cried as she rushed out the room hastily.
"She named the foods again? Please don't tell me we're having cuisines named after 'dead-but-edible' creatures...again," Thaddeus groaned at the thought.
"Well, it's not like it's something new. Li Kay has been doing that ever since," Dee shrugged carelessly.
"God! Every time she does that, it makes me almost guilty for eating those cooked livestock. I can barely go through with prayer! Imagine praying; - thank you God for blessing us with these foods, thank you Jim for dying so that we can eat you! Ugh!! I'm already feeling sick just by thinking of it. And as per usual, I will end up having bread with butter for dinner..."
"Well, good luck surviving tonight. I was at the kitchen a while ago and Madam Bouvier informed me that we'll be having Tom, James, Linda and Mary for dinner,"
"And that is supposed to make me feel better?"
"Nope. Just notifying you beforehand that you might have to prepare two loaves of bread for tonight,"
"Master! I can't go on having bread for dinner each night!"
"Unless you have a way of stopping Li Kay from naming the foods, you either put up with it or continue having bread for dinner,"
"Master, you have got to stop spoiling her!"
"Why don't you stop her for me?" hinting mischief in his voice, Dee watched his assistant turned red as a tomato.
"Master!!" Thaddeus exclaimed in awkwardness.
"Ok...ok...! I'll speak to her. But I doubt it's going to make any difference. After all, it is Li Kay we're talking here. She can be pretty stubborn when she wants to,"
"You don't have to remind me," replied the weary assistant as he massaged his furrowed forehead.
"Enough about her. Come to my studies once you've finished your tasks here," Dee said authoritatively.
Just as he turned his back to leave, Ryo called after him, "Dee! ...Can I have a word in private with you?"
Not flinching from where he stood, "Ted, leave us," he told the younger man.
"I'll be in the studies if you need me," Thaddeus said as he excused himself from the room.
Drawing up a chair from the coffee table, Dee sat with his leg crossed over the other while he waited for the other man to take his seat across the table.
"It's always chilly around this time of the year. You should stay inside where it's warmer. Moreover, you were drugged by Raven so naturally, you should stay in bed, resting. I can get Li Kay to tend to your every need without having to move you around..." he said indifferently though his voice hinted otherwise but Ryo cut him short.
"Dee, that's not what I want to speak to you about!"
"Then, what is it?! What is it that you want?!! Goddamn it, Ryo!! I've told you before not to ask!" the man snapped back at his lover.
"And you expect me to sit around and do nothing but wait for answers to come knocking on my door?! Well, sorry to disappoint you, I can't do that!!"
"Then, what is it that you want to know?! What is it that you want to hear?!"
"What I want hear is the truth, Dee... I want to know your past...Is that too much to ask for?"
Concealed beneath his long black bangs, he squeezed his eyes shut to restrain spilling of tears, "... Damnit!" he cursed under his breath, "I'm a killer, - a bloody, cold-hearted bastard who kill others for a living!! Is that what you want to hear?!!" Slamming his fist hard on the elliptical glass table, Dee stood from his seat curtly as he contained the anger from exploding, "I'm not the saint you thought I would be but the devil who feeds on other's life, who does Satan's bidding nevertheless... I'm a monster in the form of a human, a man not worthy of your love..."
As Dee began to walk away, a hand stretched out and held the man's arm firmly, "I can't tell you that I can ignore your past, because I can't... I can't ignore a part of your life that has been there... But neither can I ignore the love I have for you. So stop treating me like every one else because I'm not like every one else... I'm your lover! Anata boku wa no koibito desu..." The black orbs in that man's eyes softened with empathy as he pulled the man close to him, - whispering the last few words with intense sincerity over his aesthetically low voice into Dee's ears.
Fiery diminished along the tide of his lover's velvety low voice, - in exchange for the warmness of love that surged his heart. As overwhelmed as he should be, Dee couldn't bring himself to smile for the love he had always wanted. Instead, darkness clouded the inner orb of the smoke-green eyes.
"I'm no longer the same old Dee, no longer the Dee Laytner, you know. Nothing good will ever come to you if you stay with me..."
"When has it ever?" Ryo rhetorically asked back with a smirk as he led the both of them back into the bedroom.
"You don't want to do this..." Dee said indecisively. Defiance against his heart's wishes was utterly useless with Ryo's hands expertly removing Dee's black vest.
"For once, I want to do this..." the blond man whispered sensuously despite the crimson shades that crept into his cheeks.
Arching his head closer till their lips were only inches apart, Dee whispered back hoarsely, "God... I want you...I want you bad..."
"Then, take me..." swallowing hard, the voice of his sanity drowned in lust as he added affectionately, "...take me in, Dee..."
At convergence of their lips, he could feel his lover melting into the succulent softness of the kiss. All sensible deliberation had dissolved into nothingness as Ryo's tongue tried to probe through Dee's lips, only to be taken by surprise when the dark-haired lover darted his tongue first into the other's mouth. Entwining, interweaving their tongues together, Dee delved into every corner and marked his claim without mercy. The flaxen man moaned pleasurably, allowing the other man to do as he pleased. Torturously, Dee nibbled and sucked his lover's lower lip till it became red and swollen.
He was so close to losing into his maddening hunger for sex when Ryo's hands explored around the hardening bulge hidden beneath his skin- tight black pants. However, at the moment his blond lover laid his hands on the zip, preparing to ease the man's length from the constriction, Dee broke off the kiss abruptly, practically tearing himself away from the addiction and detached himself from the other's embrace.
"Dee..." Ryo called out faintly with hints of query between gasp for breath. He tried to reach out for the man's shoulder, hoping that he would turn around and hold him in a warm embrace, but instead Dee slapped Ryo's hand off his shoulder.
Hurt by his coldness, tears brimmed on the verge of shedding, "Don't do this to me, Dee..." he pled.
"God! Either you're delusional or I am because there is no way in Hell this is ever gonna happen!"
"I'm not delusional and neither are you! This is happening because I want you as much as you want me!!"
Silenced by the truth in his statement, Dee tightened his grip around the forearms as his body trembled violently. Wrapping his arm around the man's middle, Ryo rested his head on Dee's broad shoulder, "Dee... You mean the world to me... You're everything to me... I don't want to lose you to some past that has returned to haunt you...Please, Dee..."
Turning to face his lover's heartfelt gaze, Dee lowered his eyelids till the dark green eyes hid beneath to savor another dip into the sweetness of his lover's lips. Not ceasing the intensity that grew in the kiss, Dee led Ryo one step at a time, back to the king-sized four-poster bed before unceremoniously threw him back on the soft mattress.
Breathing heavily as he locked his gaze on his lover's jet black eyes, "Make love to me?" asked the man, laying himself on top of the other man. Taking gulps of air, Ryo spread his arms and legs wide as an open invitation for the man to take him wholly.
"God! I love you..." moaned the raven-haired as he rested his entire weight on his lover, worshipping every inch of Ryo's flesh with kisses.
* * * * * * * * * * *
It was not until seven in the evening, when the blazing sun was on the periphery of the horizon; - had Dee finally exhausted his lover with a long but well-deserved love-making as though there were no tomorrows. Without waking the sleeping figure next to him, he slipped his arm from the man's waist, - caressing his lover's smooth and fair skin along the way, nonetheless. Lifting his upper body to rest upright against the headboard, the ebony-haired master of the unexpectedly grandiose mansion smiled as he stroke the fine blondish brown hair of the man he could never win over despite the riches that flooded his Swiss account nor the power vested in him as an invisible killer. In the presence of the man he loved, none of these seemed to matter anymore because the world ultimately fades away into oblivion in the comfort of each other's arms. Undeniable, the compelling force of love has proven to be stronger than any power in this world.
Twitching a little as his lover traced his smooth jaw line feather- lightly with his index finger, Ryo stirred under his affectionate touch though his eyes could hardly open.
"Dee?"
"Did I wake you?"
Shaking his head slightly, Ryo pushed himself up a little to position his head on Dee's bare chest as he listened to the stead heartbeat of his lover. Instinctively, the other man enfolded one arms around him to secure the man from slipping off.
Fondling with loose strands of blond, he took a sharp intake of breath, "...I was afraid of what you would think of me if I told you about my horrid past..." Dee's words alone had caught the other's attention immediately as Ryo picked up his head to look closely at his lover, "... I was afraid that if you knew, you would leave me... and I would lose you...That's why I kept it from you... that is why I didn't want you to know..."
"...Dee, you're not going to lose me... I'm here, with you forever more..."
Looking sadly into the pool of dark orbs in Ryo's eyes, a small but sincere smile carved on the man's face, "Thank you..."
Snuggling closer to the warmth of his lover's embrace, Ryo smiled contentedly as he waited patiently for Dee to unravel the yarn of his past.
"Naïve as a kid, innocent as a newborn infant, I was an extraordinarily curious in my growing years. Little things catch my interest and I make it my business to know. Maybe it was this bad habit I have, that drew me into the web Raven had prepared to trap me in with... As though it happened yesterday, I recalled everything clearly till the very last detail. I was a rookie, fresh graduate from the academy when Raven had laid his eyes on me at an on-field shoot-out. With the authorities endowed in him, he removed me from the precinct in a flash and I was told that I was reassigned to work for a government force. Of course, being the dense idiot I have always been, I did as I was told without asking anymore than I should.
DIEs, abbreviation for Division of International Espionage, - is a secret government organization that does the dirty bidding as indicated by the Elders, governors of DIEs' every operations and activities. Raven was one of them until I came along. He was the best DIEs had to offered but being at the top, he was restricted from coming in contact with anyone, for all identities of Elders are kept from others' knowledge. Hence, all because I need a more adequate mentor, he gave up his place with the Elders with a death vow to secrecy. If he was found guilty for betraying them, Raven's head would roll off his shoulders in no time.
I spent three month training with weapons, martial arts and heavy artilleries under the attentiveness of Raven. Working with Raven in those days had created an unsaid bond between us, - somewhat like father and son. He was the second closes person to a father after Jess, and for that, I really respect that man..." Dee took a moment to himself as a shuddering breath escaped his lips. It was in those greyish green eyes that Ryo saw the heart-rendering guilt concealed deep within the orbs as tears welled and slid down his burning cheeks. But he made no move to hide his emotions.
"From a newbie, I grew to a full-fledged imperialist or assassins as you call them, within three months of my training. The Elders had taken a liking for me and more often than not, I was sent on major operations with two partners of mine, - knives-expert, Alex and the beautiful and charming but nevertheless, lethal with a sword, Shuro Kazue..."
Abruptly interrupting the man, "Was... is she your first love?" he asked unsteadily, trying not to sound too insecure.
"I loved her alright, but not the kind of love I have for you. What I had for her was a brother-sisterly kind of love... Kazue was one of the few prodigies in this world who absorbs knowledge faster than any normal human. And because of this, she was often mistaken for a cold and uncompassionate person, but only fools would fall for her cold-exteriors. No one could blame her for being indifferent. She was only ten when she was brought into DIEs and no older than fifteen when she was assigned to be my partner. It wasn't her nature to be sociable hence, at times she was hard to get along with but when once she opened up to a person, Kazue became very much attached, - to me in particular. However... she was killed during an operation due to..." he hesitated, closing his eyes to hinder the guilt that was pouring in the form of tears, "...my recklessness... I should have seen it coming..."
Holding his lover to comfort the man, Ryo hushed in silent whispers, "It's not your fault... You didn't know..."
"No, I knew!!" he fought back with anger that built up from guilt, "I knew it from the very beginning that Raven was plotting to kill Kazue and make it look like an accident on the night of the operation! I knew that she would be in danger!! I knew but I wasn't able to prevent it from happening. I even permitted for her to go on the mission herself! God!! I practically sent her to her death!! I should have been there for her! I should have stopped her from going!! I could have saved her... but I didn't..."
No word to convey, no expression to portray. Utterly speechless as breath arrested in his throat, not being able to breathe as Ryo gazed uncomprehendingly at his guilt-ridden lover.
Author's note²: I know I haven't been writing much about the gang
back at the 27th Precinct... I know... I miss them, too T.T But
I promise, they will be back soon ^^
OOC characters of Feign:
Li Kay : (Also known as Rikei by fellow members of the
household) Shadow Manor's caretaker; - placed fully in-
charged of everything that goes around in the household.
(Sorry for the confusion!! I just love her names!)
Thaddeus Theodore : Dee's personal assistant; - in
charge of providing Dee with essentials and takes care of
Dee's private matters and personal monetary transactions.
^^(I like Teddy!!)
Madam Bouvier : Shadow Manor's cook.
Raven : The ultimate baddie in this story.
Alexandria Chateaubriand : Dee's ex-partner; knives-
expert
Jacqueline Chateaubriand : Dee's god-daughter
(deceased)
Shuro Kazue : Dee's ex-partner (deceased)
Disclaimer : None of Dee's past is based on the real story as
drawn in Sanami Matoh's FAKE. It's entirely imaginary. I-M-A-G-I-
N-A-R-Y!!
Chapter Six: "I should have...I could have..."
Tending to her master's request for her to join him in his study hall, Rikei had long left the man to reflect the matter on his own. Flexing his body inwardly towards the banister while resting his arms on the marble railings, Ryo propped up an arm to rest his chin on the back of his palm as his midnight-black eyes looked out into the azure-blue sky but his mind wandered far into a world of his own. Sighing with despondency weighing from the heart, his slender fingers raked through his blond tresses as thoughts swam across his messed-up mind.
'I thought I knew this man... I thought I knew all there is to know about him... but it seems that I am wrong to think that all this while as his partner/lover I would know this man completely, - because I don't... Pieces of information gained as the passing hours drift by gradually draw us apart, detaching every link I have for the man. The finer details supplemented by associates of his past contradicted with everything I know of the man...And I cannot discard the uncertainty felt within that I am slowly losing the man I love to a complete stranger...'
Soft knocks on his doors startled the occupied detective with a small jump.
"Come in," he called out.
"Good afternoon, Detective MacLean," said a man of his mid-twenties as he walked through the mahogany door with a tray of Darjeeling tea in his hand.
"Good afternoon..." Ryo replied hesitantly.
"I'm Master Dee's personal assistant, Thaddeus Theodore," self- introducing as he set the tray down on the coffee table out on the balcony with a warm smile.
"Or commonly known as Teddy," added a female voice mischievously, popping out form the man's back.
"Rikei!" Thaddeus exclaimed, startled by her mysterious appearance.
"Li Kay!!" she corrected irritably, "For the last time, Teddy... my name is Li Kay, not Rikei! Sheesh!!" slapping lightly on her forehead, "I don't know why I even bother to correct any of you anyway. It's not as if it will make any difference."
"I'll call you Li Kay if you promise not to call me Teddy anymore, agree?" Thaddeus said without looking at her as he continued pouring Ryo a cup of tea.
"That is totally out of the question! I've been calling you Teddy ever since the first day. You are practically asking me to break it out of my habit,"
"Look, Li Kay... I don't have time for this right now. Can't you see that I'm tending to the guest here?"
"And for a minute there I thought you've forgotten about your duty," added a stern voice from the shadow of the room as he stepped into the light.
"Master!" the two younger individuals in the room exclaimed with astonishment. "Dee!" exclaimed the blond officer nonetheless.
Fixating his dark green eyes on those two, he walked over to Thaddeus with annoyance written on his façade, "There is no need for the both of you to pretend. I may have been away for five years but that doesn't mean I don't know what goes around in this household. So, either you guys polish your act to make your bickering look real or quit the surreal act, or start doing what couples does. And to start with, go get yourself a room. I believe the manor have more than enough rooms for you to 'do' whatever you want," Dee said with a grin, causing the younger two blush in shades of dark crimson.
"Master!" Li Kay cried out embarrassedly.
"If you're done here, Li Kay, Madam Bouvier needs you in the kitchen... something about the mackerel being rotten. You left it unattended again, didn't you?" Dee said, hinting heavily on her mistake.
"Ah!! Jim!!" the nineteen-year-old girl cried as she rushed out the room hastily.
"She named the foods again? Please don't tell me we're having cuisines named after 'dead-but-edible' creatures...again," Thaddeus groaned at the thought.
"Well, it's not like it's something new. Li Kay has been doing that ever since," Dee shrugged carelessly.
"God! Every time she does that, it makes me almost guilty for eating those cooked livestock. I can barely go through with prayer! Imagine praying; - thank you God for blessing us with these foods, thank you Jim for dying so that we can eat you! Ugh!! I'm already feeling sick just by thinking of it. And as per usual, I will end up having bread with butter for dinner..."
"Well, good luck surviving tonight. I was at the kitchen a while ago and Madam Bouvier informed me that we'll be having Tom, James, Linda and Mary for dinner,"
"And that is supposed to make me feel better?"
"Nope. Just notifying you beforehand that you might have to prepare two loaves of bread for tonight,"
"Master! I can't go on having bread for dinner each night!"
"Unless you have a way of stopping Li Kay from naming the foods, you either put up with it or continue having bread for dinner,"
"Master, you have got to stop spoiling her!"
"Why don't you stop her for me?" hinting mischief in his voice, Dee watched his assistant turned red as a tomato.
"Master!!" Thaddeus exclaimed in awkwardness.
"Ok...ok...! I'll speak to her. But I doubt it's going to make any difference. After all, it is Li Kay we're talking here. She can be pretty stubborn when she wants to,"
"You don't have to remind me," replied the weary assistant as he massaged his furrowed forehead.
"Enough about her. Come to my studies once you've finished your tasks here," Dee said authoritatively.
Just as he turned his back to leave, Ryo called after him, "Dee! ...Can I have a word in private with you?"
Not flinching from where he stood, "Ted, leave us," he told the younger man.
"I'll be in the studies if you need me," Thaddeus said as he excused himself from the room.
Drawing up a chair from the coffee table, Dee sat with his leg crossed over the other while he waited for the other man to take his seat across the table.
"It's always chilly around this time of the year. You should stay inside where it's warmer. Moreover, you were drugged by Raven so naturally, you should stay in bed, resting. I can get Li Kay to tend to your every need without having to move you around..." he said indifferently though his voice hinted otherwise but Ryo cut him short.
"Dee, that's not what I want to speak to you about!"
"Then, what is it?! What is it that you want?!! Goddamn it, Ryo!! I've told you before not to ask!" the man snapped back at his lover.
"And you expect me to sit around and do nothing but wait for answers to come knocking on my door?! Well, sorry to disappoint you, I can't do that!!"
"Then, what is it that you want to know?! What is it that you want to hear?!"
"What I want hear is the truth, Dee... I want to know your past...Is that too much to ask for?"
Concealed beneath his long black bangs, he squeezed his eyes shut to restrain spilling of tears, "... Damnit!" he cursed under his breath, "I'm a killer, - a bloody, cold-hearted bastard who kill others for a living!! Is that what you want to hear?!!" Slamming his fist hard on the elliptical glass table, Dee stood from his seat curtly as he contained the anger from exploding, "I'm not the saint you thought I would be but the devil who feeds on other's life, who does Satan's bidding nevertheless... I'm a monster in the form of a human, a man not worthy of your love..."
As Dee began to walk away, a hand stretched out and held the man's arm firmly, "I can't tell you that I can ignore your past, because I can't... I can't ignore a part of your life that has been there... But neither can I ignore the love I have for you. So stop treating me like every one else because I'm not like every one else... I'm your lover! Anata boku wa no koibito desu..." The black orbs in that man's eyes softened with empathy as he pulled the man close to him, - whispering the last few words with intense sincerity over his aesthetically low voice into Dee's ears.
Fiery diminished along the tide of his lover's velvety low voice, - in exchange for the warmness of love that surged his heart. As overwhelmed as he should be, Dee couldn't bring himself to smile for the love he had always wanted. Instead, darkness clouded the inner orb of the smoke-green eyes.
"I'm no longer the same old Dee, no longer the Dee Laytner, you know. Nothing good will ever come to you if you stay with me..."
"When has it ever?" Ryo rhetorically asked back with a smirk as he led the both of them back into the bedroom.
"You don't want to do this..." Dee said indecisively. Defiance against his heart's wishes was utterly useless with Ryo's hands expertly removing Dee's black vest.
"For once, I want to do this..." the blond man whispered sensuously despite the crimson shades that crept into his cheeks.
Arching his head closer till their lips were only inches apart, Dee whispered back hoarsely, "God... I want you...I want you bad..."
"Then, take me..." swallowing hard, the voice of his sanity drowned in lust as he added affectionately, "...take me in, Dee..."
At convergence of their lips, he could feel his lover melting into the succulent softness of the kiss. All sensible deliberation had dissolved into nothingness as Ryo's tongue tried to probe through Dee's lips, only to be taken by surprise when the dark-haired lover darted his tongue first into the other's mouth. Entwining, interweaving their tongues together, Dee delved into every corner and marked his claim without mercy. The flaxen man moaned pleasurably, allowing the other man to do as he pleased. Torturously, Dee nibbled and sucked his lover's lower lip till it became red and swollen.
He was so close to losing into his maddening hunger for sex when Ryo's hands explored around the hardening bulge hidden beneath his skin- tight black pants. However, at the moment his blond lover laid his hands on the zip, preparing to ease the man's length from the constriction, Dee broke off the kiss abruptly, practically tearing himself away from the addiction and detached himself from the other's embrace.
"Dee..." Ryo called out faintly with hints of query between gasp for breath. He tried to reach out for the man's shoulder, hoping that he would turn around and hold him in a warm embrace, but instead Dee slapped Ryo's hand off his shoulder.
Hurt by his coldness, tears brimmed on the verge of shedding, "Don't do this to me, Dee..." he pled.
"God! Either you're delusional or I am because there is no way in Hell this is ever gonna happen!"
"I'm not delusional and neither are you! This is happening because I want you as much as you want me!!"
Silenced by the truth in his statement, Dee tightened his grip around the forearms as his body trembled violently. Wrapping his arm around the man's middle, Ryo rested his head on Dee's broad shoulder, "Dee... You mean the world to me... You're everything to me... I don't want to lose you to some past that has returned to haunt you...Please, Dee..."
Turning to face his lover's heartfelt gaze, Dee lowered his eyelids till the dark green eyes hid beneath to savor another dip into the sweetness of his lover's lips. Not ceasing the intensity that grew in the kiss, Dee led Ryo one step at a time, back to the king-sized four-poster bed before unceremoniously threw him back on the soft mattress.
Breathing heavily as he locked his gaze on his lover's jet black eyes, "Make love to me?" asked the man, laying himself on top of the other man. Taking gulps of air, Ryo spread his arms and legs wide as an open invitation for the man to take him wholly.
"God! I love you..." moaned the raven-haired as he rested his entire weight on his lover, worshipping every inch of Ryo's flesh with kisses.
* * * * * * * * * * *
It was not until seven in the evening, when the blazing sun was on the periphery of the horizon; - had Dee finally exhausted his lover with a long but well-deserved love-making as though there were no tomorrows. Without waking the sleeping figure next to him, he slipped his arm from the man's waist, - caressing his lover's smooth and fair skin along the way, nonetheless. Lifting his upper body to rest upright against the headboard, the ebony-haired master of the unexpectedly grandiose mansion smiled as he stroke the fine blondish brown hair of the man he could never win over despite the riches that flooded his Swiss account nor the power vested in him as an invisible killer. In the presence of the man he loved, none of these seemed to matter anymore because the world ultimately fades away into oblivion in the comfort of each other's arms. Undeniable, the compelling force of love has proven to be stronger than any power in this world.
Twitching a little as his lover traced his smooth jaw line feather- lightly with his index finger, Ryo stirred under his affectionate touch though his eyes could hardly open.
"Dee?"
"Did I wake you?"
Shaking his head slightly, Ryo pushed himself up a little to position his head on Dee's bare chest as he listened to the stead heartbeat of his lover. Instinctively, the other man enfolded one arms around him to secure the man from slipping off.
Fondling with loose strands of blond, he took a sharp intake of breath, "...I was afraid of what you would think of me if I told you about my horrid past..." Dee's words alone had caught the other's attention immediately as Ryo picked up his head to look closely at his lover, "... I was afraid that if you knew, you would leave me... and I would lose you...That's why I kept it from you... that is why I didn't want you to know..."
"...Dee, you're not going to lose me... I'm here, with you forever more..."
Looking sadly into the pool of dark orbs in Ryo's eyes, a small but sincere smile carved on the man's face, "Thank you..."
Snuggling closer to the warmth of his lover's embrace, Ryo smiled contentedly as he waited patiently for Dee to unravel the yarn of his past.
"Naïve as a kid, innocent as a newborn infant, I was an extraordinarily curious in my growing years. Little things catch my interest and I make it my business to know. Maybe it was this bad habit I have, that drew me into the web Raven had prepared to trap me in with... As though it happened yesterday, I recalled everything clearly till the very last detail. I was a rookie, fresh graduate from the academy when Raven had laid his eyes on me at an on-field shoot-out. With the authorities endowed in him, he removed me from the precinct in a flash and I was told that I was reassigned to work for a government force. Of course, being the dense idiot I have always been, I did as I was told without asking anymore than I should.
DIEs, abbreviation for Division of International Espionage, - is a secret government organization that does the dirty bidding as indicated by the Elders, governors of DIEs' every operations and activities. Raven was one of them until I came along. He was the best DIEs had to offered but being at the top, he was restricted from coming in contact with anyone, for all identities of Elders are kept from others' knowledge. Hence, all because I need a more adequate mentor, he gave up his place with the Elders with a death vow to secrecy. If he was found guilty for betraying them, Raven's head would roll off his shoulders in no time.
I spent three month training with weapons, martial arts and heavy artilleries under the attentiveness of Raven. Working with Raven in those days had created an unsaid bond between us, - somewhat like father and son. He was the second closes person to a father after Jess, and for that, I really respect that man..." Dee took a moment to himself as a shuddering breath escaped his lips. It was in those greyish green eyes that Ryo saw the heart-rendering guilt concealed deep within the orbs as tears welled and slid down his burning cheeks. But he made no move to hide his emotions.
"From a newbie, I grew to a full-fledged imperialist or assassins as you call them, within three months of my training. The Elders had taken a liking for me and more often than not, I was sent on major operations with two partners of mine, - knives-expert, Alex and the beautiful and charming but nevertheless, lethal with a sword, Shuro Kazue..."
Abruptly interrupting the man, "Was... is she your first love?" he asked unsteadily, trying not to sound too insecure.
"I loved her alright, but not the kind of love I have for you. What I had for her was a brother-sisterly kind of love... Kazue was one of the few prodigies in this world who absorbs knowledge faster than any normal human. And because of this, she was often mistaken for a cold and uncompassionate person, but only fools would fall for her cold-exteriors. No one could blame her for being indifferent. She was only ten when she was brought into DIEs and no older than fifteen when she was assigned to be my partner. It wasn't her nature to be sociable hence, at times she was hard to get along with but when once she opened up to a person, Kazue became very much attached, - to me in particular. However... she was killed during an operation due to..." he hesitated, closing his eyes to hinder the guilt that was pouring in the form of tears, "...my recklessness... I should have seen it coming..."
Holding his lover to comfort the man, Ryo hushed in silent whispers, "It's not your fault... You didn't know..."
"No, I knew!!" he fought back with anger that built up from guilt, "I knew it from the very beginning that Raven was plotting to kill Kazue and make it look like an accident on the night of the operation! I knew that she would be in danger!! I knew but I wasn't able to prevent it from happening. I even permitted for her to go on the mission herself! God!! I practically sent her to her death!! I should have been there for her! I should have stopped her from going!! I could have saved her... but I didn't..."
No word to convey, no expression to portray. Utterly speechless as breath arrested in his throat, not being able to breathe as Ryo gazed uncomprehendingly at his guilt-ridden lover.
Author's note²: I know I haven't been writing much about the gang
back at the 27th Precinct... I know... I miss them, too T.T But
I promise, they will be back soon ^^
OOC characters of Feign:
Li Kay : (Also known as Rikei by fellow members of the
household) Shadow Manor's caretaker; - placed fully in-
charged of everything that goes around in the household.
(Sorry for the confusion!! I just love her names!)
Thaddeus Theodore : Dee's personal assistant; - in
charge of providing Dee with essentials and takes care of
Dee's private matters and personal monetary transactions.
^^(I like Teddy!!)
Madam Bouvier : Shadow Manor's cook.
Raven : The ultimate baddie in this story.
Alexandria Chateaubriand : Dee's ex-partner; knives-
expert
Jacqueline Chateaubriand : Dee's god-daughter
(deceased)
Shuro Kazue : Dee's ex-partner (deceased)