First of all I'm sorry this took so long. I've been really busy lately with tonnes of homework. And I got a great new video game! It's great, but I beat it... : (

Jak: Of course all that is good for all us!

Cir: Time for a historical chapter. You'll see why.

BAR WARS : ATTACK OF THE PHONES
Chapter Five: "Eep."

Jak was looking around with Praxis and Errrol, who for once, wasn't on fire. But that changed when a zoomer exploded on a wall and set him on fire again. "Why can't anything leave me alone?" he groaned.

The three were busy looking for Kor's pet, while at the same time, keeping an eye out for anything.

"Why do we have to get the dangerous mission?" Praxis groaned. "I don't want to die for the seventh time!"

"Is it seven?" Jak asked.

"Would you keep track of how many times you died?" Praxis asked.

"Well, I'm sure from all the people that have played games with me in it, I've probably died at least a billion times," Jak replied.

"That's right, and-" Praxis was suddenly stepped on by Kor's pet. It did have four legs, but it also had four heads, four butts, four eyes, four tails, seven toes, four nostrils and four ears. It growled and snapped at Jak, who replied with: "Eep."

Errrol punched it but all that did was snap his wrist. Praxis crawled out from underneath the foot. "I'm okay!" he said before the pet farted and made him faint.

"I'm surprised he hasn't died with his luck," Erol said.

"When did you get here?" Kor asked.

"When did you?"

"I asked first!"

"Fifteen seconds ago, you?"

"Same."

While they talked, the pet walked away.

Veger was walking down the street with a belt with grenades, asemi-automatic rifle and a mini-nuc, which Ratchet from Ratchet and Clank took back and sacked him.

"Why are you so heavily armed?" Errol asked.

"Torn and Daxter are trying to kill me!" Veger answered.

"Is that why they're trying to sniper you?" Errol asked before stepping in front of the bullet which bounced off his metal.

"Probably." He shot the water tower beside Daxter and Torn, who were on a roof, and it flooded them into the ocean, so they swam to the wasteland, where Kleiver and Seem were.

"Maybe I should work at MacRonald's," Kleiver said to her. "What do you think?"

"I think you should stop following me around when I buy my food!" Seem said before putting some cheese into a bugie.

"Maybe Hot dog King?"

"Are you even listening to me?"

"You're right, Green Lobster is better."

Seem threw Kleiver into a freezer that ice cream is kept in and put a stack of concrete blocks to keep him from getting out, when Torn blew up the wall that had hot dogs. "What now?" Daxter asked Torn.

Seem threw them in another freezer and did the same.

Jak came in the same hole. "Where are they?"

Seem was still mad at Jak for destroying her cell phone so she threw him in a freezer and piled up anvils, dug a moat around it and dumped full grown crocodiles into the moat.

Kor's pet backed away slowly, wimpering (which must mean it was pretty scared since it is a giant monster!).

(Back in Haven City)

Pecker had beaten the entire Sly Cooper series before Et had finished reading the chapter. Then he was able to beat Halo 1, 2 and Ratchet and Clank 3.

"Done!" Et said, closing the book.

"Finally!" Pecker said. "So un-hypnotize him!"

Et took out adiamond bat and hit Jinx in the head so hard that the bat broke it half, set on fire and the broken part went flying and knocked the moon out of orbit. Jinx's eyes were completely unfocused for a second before he went into a coma.

Pecker twitched. "What the hell was that?"

"That's what you do to unhypnotize him," Et said before putting the stump that was left of the flaming bat back in a case. "He should wake up in a month or two."

"Why did that take so long to read?" Pecker asked.

"I was actually reading a Garfield comic."

Pecker growled. "Maybe one of us shouldstay andmake sure he doesn't get eaten by metalheads," he said. "I vote you."But Et Cetera had already left.

Daxter and Torn were driving in their destroyed car, meaning it could only go about 3 kilometres an hour and had puffs of smoke coming from the engine. "I hate that Sidious," Torn said.

"You can say that again Odi Wack Canoe," Daxter said.

"I hate that Sidious."

"I didn't mean to say it again," Daxter said.

"I hate that Sidious."

"Stop!"

"I wasn't paying attention to anything except 'say it again'," Torn said.

Hmmm, this isn't going anywhere. Time to check the plot of Star Wars 2. Aha! I know what to do...

"I think I should visit my mom," Daxter said.

"Okay," Torn said. "Just... where would she be?"

Daxter didn't have an answer. "Let's go to another planet." And so they got lost in the palace because they drove through a window and were too stupid to drive back out it or down the stairs.

Good enough for now.

Jak: (frozen solid) Pez derest meh!

Cir: Shut up. Review!