Kon'nichi wa Minna!
Well, here's another chapter of Koneko Wars, complete with fanservice! Not a lot of fanservice, but still it's there! A huge hug goes out to all my reviewers and anyone else who might need one at the moment.
As for the ongoing pairing debate...I'm just not sure anymore. Originally my heart was set on Ranken, but as this goes on I'm having a greater appreciation for Yoken and I'm wondering if it wouldn't kill me to just make it a RanYoKen and call it done. Whaddya think?
Did you notice that I updated before the year was up? Good, ne? Enjoy the read and let me know what you think.
Whisper
The Koneko Wars
Chapter 12: Flower Shop Blues
"Farfie-kun will you help me with this plant? It's awfully heavy." Farfello flinched as yet another of the putrid spawn called him 'Farfie-kun' and tried to get him to lift something. Damn Weiß for this stupid cover and damn Crawford for making them participate in it. The Irishman's only solace was that Crawford was fairing no better.
"Crawford-san, you're sooo dreamy. Say something in English!"
"Crawford-san, will you go out with me?"
"Neither of you will be buying anything today. If you do not leave the store in the next five minutes, I'm retrieving Aby...Aya." Crawford winced at his near slip. He still found it difficult to refer to Weiß by their given names. Ken wasn't as difficult, seeing as Schuldich mentioned him at least once an hour, for which the American was not jealous. At all. He had no reason to be, really. The two were what some termed "best friends" and had never sated their more carnal urges with one another. As Schuldich put it, "it would be incestuous." Not that Crawford put incest past Schuldich, but the telepath seemed to be telling the truth. He hoped.
"Sugoi! Aya-kun and Crawford-san!" The girls in the shop were screaming again in hopes of having both their Aya-kun and their Crawford-san together in the same room.
"I'm going to kill them," Farfello confided to Crawford, swatting a clingy schoolgirl off his leg. "I'm going to take these pruning sheers and stab them in the heart, laughing while they die."
"Lunch time!" Nagi entered the shop from the back and smiled at their patrons. "I'm sorry, you'll have to come back in an hour, the shop is closing for lunch." The girls smiled at Nagi and quickly left without so much as a squeal.
"How?" Farfello asked the younger Schwarz, gripping him by the strings of his apron. "How do you avoid them? They don't "Nagi-kun" you or swarm you like vultures. How?" Nagi took a step back and smiled, pointing to his apron.
"The girls have been warned," Nagi chirped. A week ago he's stepped into the Koneko for his first shift and had been swarmed with schoolgirls, all of them touching and squealing and driving him batty. Luckily, his first shift had been with Omi, who was not at all pleased to see his telekinetic pawed at by fangirls. That night, Omi had taken fabric paint and Sharpies to Nagi's powder blue apron and had written in very large box print, "Property of Tsukiyono Omi. All Trespassers will be Shot," following up the warning with his signature. The next shift had seen a drastic reduction in the girls touching Nagi and after one overzealous girl was sprayed with the hose, none dared come near the brooding boy. Of course, now girls were clambering at Omi to be made his "property."
"That's disgusting," the Irishman growled, taking in the warning and Nagi's pride. "You've been branded like a cow."
"Better branded than covered in fangirls," Nagi shot back.
"No fighting in the shop!" Abyssinian's voice cut through the air, freezing the two Schwarz members. Why could they never hear him coming? It was unnerving. Suddenly Farfello brightened.
"Abyssinian, sign my apron." He took off the white monstrosity and thrust it toward Weiß's leader.
"No." Ran turned to go inside. "Lunch will be gone if you do not hurry, Schuldich and Ken were scouting today." It had become a tradition for Schuldich and Ken to return from scouting and eat everything in sight. Whether it was from actual hunger or just to have something to do, no one knew.
"Why do we even let them go out together anymore? We can't afford the groceries," Nagi whined, running into the house.
"They make a good team," Crawford admitted, his frown mirroring Abyssinian's. Ran wasn't keen on letting the two friends wander off, either, but the mission came first and Ken's agility matched with Schuldich's telepathy was a deadly combination.
"The mission comes first," Ran agreed. If anything, the last week had taught Ran that Crawford wasn't at all a bad person. In fact, he had begun to find many similarities between the Schwarz leader and himself. The first being their strong dislike for Schuldich and Ken's friendship. Neither of them was jealous, they were simply looking out for the greater good of their teams. It was comforting to know that, when Schuldich and Ken had to go out on an errand, Crawford was willing to wait up with him until the two returned. The two leaders would sit, watching the news channel until Ken and Schuldich returned, then usher the assassins up to their rooms and clean them up. Oftentimes, Yohji would join them, holding an unlit cigarette in his hand and idly watching the door when the others weren't looking. Surely, it was concern for their teammates that kept them up until the wee hours, sitting in the oddly comforting silence.
%%%%%%
"You thought of anything yet?" Schuldich lay, sprawled across half of Ken's bed, his eyes closed. They had consumed all of the ramen at the table and retreated to Ken's room for a planning meeting. What they were planning had yet to be determined, though they did know it centered around the growing problems with Crawford, Ran, and Yohji. Both men had realized shortly after the joining of the two teams that their sidestepping around relationships had to come to an end. Schuldich had been ignoring Brad's more than blatant interest for far too long, and Ken had been running away from Ran and Yohji's affections far more than was healthy.
"Nope. You?" Ken fell down onto the bed, staring at the ceiling. It wouldn't give him any answers, but it was as good a place to stare as any.
"Not a clue." Schuldich sighed and turned his head. "They think we're doing illicit things in this room, you know that, right?" Schuldich tried not to gag at the thought of having sex with Ken. Of all the vile ideas that had come into his head, that was the only one that seemed so...filthy.
"Gross," Ken replied automatically, adding a hasty, "No offense." to cover up any hard feelings.
"None taken. Really, you'd think they'd get it by now. Let's see what they're up to." Schuldich let his mind wander and stretch until he found the three objects of their contemplation. Once a link to each was secured, he added Ken's mind in. Sharing Ken's mind was easy, it was like a mirror to Schuldich's own. Sometimes it made Schuldich sick, knowing how similar they really were.
I wonder if Crawford knows how he sounds right now. That thought was Yohji's, Schuldich could tell by the raw amusement in it.
If Ken doesn't come down soon, I'm going up there. There's no telling what that Schwarz psychopath will do to him. That was definitely Ran; so trusting, so caring.
"I suppose it's a good thing he doesn't say half of what he thinks," Schuldich muttered. He knew Ran disliked him, but being called a psychopath was a bit much at this stage in their relationship, he thought.
"He's just worried," Ken sighed, patting Schuldich's hand in sympathy. "He insults people when he's worried. You know, make them less than you are so you don't have to feel so inferior." Ken propped himself up on his elbows and looked down at his friend. "He thinks he's competing with you and you've got to admit that being up against a telepath stacks the odds against you, no matter what you're competing for."
"If I didn't know you'd kill me, I'd just cement it into his paranoid little brain that I'm not interested in you." Schuldich mumbled. "At least Yohji gets it."
"Yohji's been around longer, he understands me better than Ran does." Ken slid back down and resumed staring at the ceiling.
"You know, if you'd have just fucked them both in the beginning, you wouldn't be in this mess." Schuldich ignored Ken's screams of indignation. "Think about it, though. You danced around with everyone and anyone to get your mind off of them, knowing full well that at any time they would've welcomed you into their mushy, love-filled lives. Then, when your resolve finally breaks and you make the decision to settle down, you get spooked and run away again. Not to mention all this "guilt" you're feeling about having slept with Ran and not Yohji." Ken made as if to speak but Schuldich held his hand up, silencing him. "I know, I know, I've been supporting your less than savory habits, but what did you expect me to do? Friends support eachother, they don't run one another's lives. You fuck up, I applaud your stupidity. You ask for help, I give it. You tell me to fuck off, I ignore you. It's in the job description."
"Speaking of fuck ups," Ken retorted, more than a little bit upset at having his flaws shoved in his face, "let's talk about you for a moment. For months I've been hearing 'I miss Brad' and 'I wonder where Brad is' and 'Dammit, why doesn't Brad ever call me?'" Ken tried to impersonate Schuldich's accent but ended up sounding more like one of the Koneko fangirls. "And all of it for nothing, Schu. Brad's crazy about you, even if he's not ready to admit it to himself. Why don't you just take the first step?"
"He'll kill me," Schuldich replied dimly. "You don't understand Brad, he needs to be in charge or..."
"Coward." It was a word the two bandied about on a daily basis and it seemed to sum up their faults nicely. They were both cowards, afraid to move outside of their carefully built emotional shelters.
Looks like Aya and Crawford are going to fight, wonder who'll win. Probably Crawford, unless he's too busy thinking about Schuldich's so called virtue to use his gift. Schuldich and Ken shot up and out of the bed at Yohji's thought, wondering what was going on downstairs. Severing the link between the five of them, Schuldich tiptoed out of the room and down the stairs, Ken close behind him.
%%%%%%
Yohji felt the faint pinprick at the back of his head fade, signaling Schuldich's departure from his thoughts. He wondered when the others would realize that Schuldich, and probably Ken had been eavesdropping in on them. No matter, Ran and Crawford seemed to be busy glaring at one another and the two meddlers would be showing up soon to put an end to their fight. Awfully predictable, those two.
"I suggest you take that back before I shove this into your ribcage," Ran hissed, his grip tight on the metal spatula in his hands. All the knives had been placed in cupboards at the other end of the room due to previous disagreements in the kitchen.
"It's the truth, Abyssinian, your little whore boyfriend is trying to seduce Schuldich." There, it was out in the open now. All the jealousy and hate and...Crawford stumbled as a spatula hit him in the chest.
"It's your whoreish teammate that's seducing Ken!" The two circled, preparing for another of their brawls.
"If you're trying to seduce me, you're doing a crap job, Kenken." Schuldich's voice cut through the hissing and snarling of the two combatants.
"No no, Schu; you're seducing me this week, weren't you listening?" Ken stood beside Schuldich in the doorway, both of them looking unimpressed at the display of machismo before them. "Why didn't you stop them, Yohji?"
"I like breathing, Kenken." Yohji smiled and slowly stood to stand next to Ken, draping an arm around his shoulders. "You know how these two get when they want to beat something. Best they beat eachother, I say." Yohji was nothing if not a self-preservationist.
"Brad, Ran, go to your rooms!" Schuldich pointed toward the stairs and watched the two sulking assassins leave the room, snarling. When they had gone, Schuldich laughed, arms clutching at his stomach. "I can't believe that actually worked!"
"They were too busy loathing eachother to actually hear what you said. They'll be down in a minute to yell at you." Yohji reached into his shirt pocket and pulled out his cigarette case, offering one to Schuldich. With a wave to Ken, Schuldich took the offered sign of peace and walked with Yohji outside, leaving Ken to fix dinner.
"So," Yohji brought the conversation to a not so productive start.
"He's confused, give it time." Schuldich inhaled the carcinogens and relaxed against the side of the house.
"Omi and Nagi have almost got the coordinates of a Sturm warehouse, we don't have much time." Yohji took a drag and sunk to the ground, staring out at the street.
"Look, I'm not on your side in this, I'm on Ken's side. When he's ready to do whatever it is he's decided to do, I'll let you know. Until then, just relax. Ran's not going to win, at least not exclusively." Schuldich smirked down at the blonde. "You've been a very good kitty, not getting into fights or making stupid vows of undying love. Ken appreciates that. Ken notices that."
"You could've fooled me," Yohji grumbled, smoke trailing out of his mouth.
"He's still pissed about having to drop out of the league, okay? Every night when no one's there he's angsting up in his room, clutching a soccer ball." Schuldich paused, looking to Yohji's concerned face. The blonde was going to do something stupid any moment now. "I didn't tell you that," the redhead warned. "I didn't tell you that and you're not going to go find Ken and console him. You don't know that anything is wrong and...dammit." Yohji was up and running to the kitchen, his cigarette smoldering on the ground. Schuldich picked the discarded stick up and sighed. "No use letting it go to waste."
%%%%%%
Back in the kitchen, Ken was tenderizing meat, thinking about nothing in particular. Arms slid around him and he, unthinking lashed out with the meat tenderizer, clubbing his assailant in the head.
"Dammit Ken, that hurt!" Oh, it was Yohji.
"Gomen, Yotan, I didn't know it was you." Ken continued to beat the meat with the metal mallet, ignoring his blonde friend. Yohji was always latching onto him nowadays, it was sweet, but nothing he needed to stop dinner preparations for.
"Your team should be coming back from training soon." Yohji's arms tightened around Ken's waist and he rested a blonde head down on a well muscled shoulder. "Bet I could convince your coach to still let you play if you wanted to."
Ken's movement stopped. These were the words he'd been both longing and dreading to hear. He could still play out the season...but then there was Weiß. The battle with Sturm was about to begin and he needed to devote all of his attention to it. Weiß came first. It came first or Kritiker would see him dead before too long. "No Yohji, it's better this way." Instinctively, Ken leaned back into the warmth of Yohji's embrace, taking deep breathes so he wouldn't cry and embarrass himself.
"But you're unhappy." Nimble fingers moved through chestnut hair, eliciting a deep sigh from the brunette.
"We're all unhappy sometimes. We get over it." It was true. Each and every one of them had given something up for Kritiker. Now it was Ken's turn. "If giving up soccer means that you're safe, it's worth it." He hadn't meant to sound so mushy. Ken felt Yohji's smile against his neck and turned to catch the other man's eyes. "I mean it Yohji, it's okay."
Time froze. The two stared at eachother for the eternity that stretches between two people finally giving in to their hearts. The world moved with a stomach knotting slowness as each man pondered what to do in the blissfully awkward moment. Yohji moved first, bringing his lips to touch Ken's in a feather-light touch. Ken responded, his lips pushing back solidly, hungrily.
Time resumed. Within moments Yohji and Ken were battling for dominance, twirling around the kitchen in a breathy cloud of need. It was Ken who took the first step, unbuttoning Yohji's black silk shirt and tossing it out of the way. Soon they stood only in unbuttoned pants, staring at one another again.
"Ken I don't think..." Yohji began, but was silenced with a probing kiss.
"Please Yohji...please?" Ken was shaking, gripping Yohji's shoulders tightly, his fingers leaving circles of white in Yohji's flesh.
"In the kitchen? What if..." Silence by another kiss and Ken's liquid eyes.
"I don't care." Ken's voice was so small, so lost that Yohji was powerless to resist. He sent a mental shout to Schuldich to keep people out of the kitchen, getting halfway through the message before Ken's tongue trailing down his chest distracted him.
%%%%%
Lunch had worn Yohji out, but no one was willing to let him get out of shop duty, least of all Farfello, who had come downstairs to make a smoothie and had found Yohji and Ken screwing eachother on the kitchen counter. Right beside the blender he needed to make his smoothie. And to make matters worse, when he'd stalked up to Crawford's room to inform him of the gross display, Crawford had dismissed him with a wave and returned to his computer screen. Solitaire was not that exciting, dammit.
"Enjoy your break Kudou?" Farfello snarled, throwing a foam brick at the blonde's head. Tragically, Yohji caught it before it could collide with his eyeball.
"Why yes, Farfello, I did. How about yourself?" Yohji really enjoyed watching Berserker's anger rise, particularly when he knew that the Irishman was under strict non-violence guidelines when in the shop.
"I hate you."
"Farfie-kun!" Farfello shrunk as his fanclub ran into the now open doors of the Koneko.
"I hate you all!" he screamed before bolting out of the shop and into the house. Ken was making dinner tonight and surely needed help. Even if he didn't cleaning the kitchen was better than being with these harpies. Maybe he could give the kitchen a nice bleach bath and it wouldn't smell like Kudou. They needed to die, all of them.