Coming Home
Chapter 4: Counting Sheep
"I really don't think this is a good idea," his father said for perhaps the tenth time, frowning at him. "What about college? What about getting a real job? How do you know you're not going to lose interest in this, and end up wasting years of your life?"
"What about all that stuff?" Jack argued, irritated. "This farm is important to me. I don't want it buried under rocks and weeds until the end of time! You grew up here, shouldn't you feel the same way?
His father sighed and adjusted the tie of his suit. The man had risin from his humble beginnings, gotten an education, and made something of himself...just like twenty-something other men in his cramped office. Even if Jack wasn't sure what he wanted to do with his life, he knew what he didn't want to do when he saw it, and putting on a suit and tie every day and going into a cramped, stale office day in and day out was definitely something on his "NOT to do" list.
His father, thankfully, had given up arguing by this time. The argument about whether or not Jack should take over his grandfather's farm had gone on for upwards of two hours before this point, and Dad was ready to concede. "At least there are some pretty girls around here. If nothing else, you might finally get yourself married."
Jack winced. His father had been constantly going on about him finally finding himself a girlfriend when he had turned 18 a few years ago, and it was rather a sore point by now. However, he merely smiled and nodded as he always did whenever the subject came up. Anything to get his father back down the mountain to the train station.
"Well, good luck," the old man said grudgingly. "I'll come visit in a few years to see how you're doing."
"See ya, Pops," Jack said. He watched his father walk away for a time, then turned and returned to the farm.
Jack awoke and stared up at the dark ceiling, feeling vaguely disturbed. What on earth had triggered that particular memory? And as a dream, no less? The dream had been so vivid, he could even now almost smell the aroma of cigarettes, which followed after his dad wherever the man went. So he wasn't making as much money working as a farmer as his father was making in his office...so what? He had expenses, after all, which were crucial to the health of the farm. The grass seed he'd recently bought had put quite a dent in his pocket, but once he had a few sheep and a cow, they'd start paying for both the seed and themselves with wool and milk. And the corn and tomatoes he'd started would, once they grew up, produce until the end season, so he wouldn't be constantly buying more seeds. Frowning at the doubts which had been dredged to the forefront of his mind by the dream, he turned over on his side to take a look at the clock on his bedside table. 5:45 am.
"Close enough," he muttered, rolling all the way out of bed and to his feet. Stifling a yawn, he pulled on a clean shirt and his coveralls and boots, humming tunelessly under his breath to distract himself from his thoughts. Abruptly remembering that the egg he'd placed in the incubator in the chicken coop was very near to hatching, he crammed his breakfast (two rice-balls, as usual) into his mouth and rushed out of the cabin, leaving the front door cracked so that Jiro could nudge his way outside when he woke up.
The happy discovery of a fuzzy yellow baby chick hopping around after Greta in the chicken coop was sufficient to drive all negative thoughts about his father and his father's insistence towards marriage out of his mind. Taking Greta carefully under his arm and holding the baby just as carefully in his other hand, he moved them both outside to the pen, where he spread a generous handful of grain for them to eat.
"Jack!" turning at the sound of his name, Jack's good spirits rose another notch at the sight of Cliff making his way towards him.
"Don't walk on the grass!" he cautioned, as Cliff started to cut through the fields.
"Sorry," Cliff grimaced, and made his way carefully around the patches which were obviously sown with seed.
"No worries," Jack said, turning away from Cliff and back towards where Greta and her chick were feeding, looking like nothing more than a proud father.
"So it hatched, huh?" Cliff said, drawing even with Jack and standing next to him.
"Yup yup!" A glance at Jack revealed him to be grinning like a buffoon. A happy buffoon. Cliff couldn't help but smile too.
"So what's her name?"
"Dunno yet...Can you think of one?"
Cliff was silent for a moment, pondering. Then he said, "Gwen?"
Jack glanced at him with a considering look.
"It's dumb, isn't it? I'll think of something else..."
"I like it." Jack interrupted, turning back to the little yellow ball of fluff that was peeping quietly as it trailed along after Greta. "Gwen it is. Good call."
Cliff flushed a little but smiled all the same.
"Grow up big and strong, little Gwen," Jack cooed to the small bird, who paused in her single-minded trailing of Greta long enough to cock a beady little eye in his direction.
"I'll let you get back to work," Cliff said after a few moments more of watching the birds.
Jack grimaced but agreed. He walked Cliff up to the cabin, then watched as he disappeared from view up the mountain trail. Turning back to face his farm, Jack felt a spurt of renewed energy. Now that he had a new member of his "family", he was invigorated to work extra hard.
"A relationship like ours can't last forever, you know,"
"Dammit, Owen, get out of my head!" Cliff muttered as he walked back up the mountain. I don't want another relationship, he said to himself, trudging across the foot bridge to the carpenter's side of the river, where the forest got deeper and where the hunting was better. Sure, he had a crush on Jack. That didn't mean anything though, did it? It shouldn't.
"Hey Cliff!" he was temporarily distracted by one of the carpenter's apprentices, who was greeting him from behind the cabin. He waved in acknowledgment but hurried on, towards the Goddess Spring deeper in the woods.
Just because I wanted to kiss him when he smiled so sweetly at his chickens does not mean that I want any sort of relationship, he continued to argue with himself. Of course, he acknowledged that he was arguing with himself, and he knew that despite what he was telling himself he wanted, or perhaps because of that, he also knew he was lying to himself.
Flopping down in a disheveled heap on the bank of the small spring, Cliff lay himself out on his stomach and propped his head up with his hands. He stared at his unhappy reflection in the water, and his unhappy reflection stared back.
I should leave, he thought miserably. I should find another town to haunt. This one is no good. It keeps reminding me of the unhappy things, and tempts me with other things. But it was difficult to conceive of such an action, even though he hadn't even been here a full season. I'm comfortable here, he let his chin slide from his hands into the crook of his left elbow, and tucked his right arm around his left to form a pillow of sorts. No one seems to care that I'm a stranger. They don't ask awkward questions, but they're friendly all the same. I've never been to a town like this one. And I don't want to move on to another.
Sighing softly, Cliff closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep, lulled by the distant sound of cicadas and the warm sun beating down onto his back.
"Sheep, sheep, I have a sheep," Jack was singing happily to himself, as he all but skipped up the trail from the Green Ranch to his own farm. The grass had grown tall and green in the past weeks, and Doug had had no worries about selling him his very first sheep.
"Don't forget to brush it every day now," the older man had warned as the deal was finishing up. Jack had smiled and nodded, even though he thought privately that he didn't need to be told like he was a five year old. He brushed his horse every day, why would he forget his sheep?
He was surprised to find both Cliff and Ann waiting for him as he turned off the path and onto his property. Ann was laughing at something Cliff had said, and Cliff was grinning sheepishly and rubbing the back of his neck.
"Hey, guys, do you need something?" Jack asked as he drew nearer, startling the both of them. Cliff's easy-going expression vanished, and Jack felt a small stab of some as-of-yet unidentified emotion in his gut. Ann's expression modified as well, though the transition was simply from mirth to friendly interest.
"Actually, I brought you some cake," she said, producing a box and holding it out to Jack.
"Thanks, Ann!" Jack said, taking the box and opening the lid.
"It's nothing special...I just got it from the bakery, so it's safe to eat..." Ann continued, frowning slightly and sounding aggrieved.
"I'm sure you make cakes equally as well as Elli," Jack said in a placating tone, though he had heard from both Grey and Doug that this was not the case.
"Really? That's nice of you to say!" Ann's smile was back full force, and she turned back to Cliff. "I'm in the mood to bake something now! Wanna come along?"
"Uh, sure!" Cliff said, swept along by Ann's enthusiasm.
"Great! See you, Jack!" Ann smiled and waved, then turned and, nearly dragging Cliff after her, left the property. Jack watched them go with a strange feeling that he wasn't entirely sure was due to the thought of Ann's legendary cooking. He thought about it as he ate his cake, but once he had the cake in his stomach, he wasn't any closer to deciphering what the odd knot of jealousy could mean. Finally, he shrugged, threw away the empty box, and headed off to the barn to let his new sheep out into the pasture.
"Hey, Jack, come on in!" Karen welcomed him that evening with a smile and a gesture to have a seat. He grinned back and did as she suggested, and was pleasantly surprised when she joined him a few moments later bearing two glasses of wine. She set one in front of him and took the other for herself as she settled onto the bench across from him.
"My treat," she said, winking.
"Hey, thanks!" Jack said, taking a sip.
"No problem," she replied, taking a sip of her own wine in turn. "So, how's life on the farm?" she asked after staring moodily into her glass for a moment. Jack figured she was again lamenting the difference in her family's wine compared to that of her grandmothers.
"Great! I just bought a sheep! And I've got three chickens now, Gertrude hatched the other day, and..." he continued to outline all the goings-ons of his farm, because Karen seemed genuinely interested and maybe, if he kept talking long enough, she'd spring for another round.
His hopes proved well-founded, for as he was talking, their drinks disappeared, and she had to interrupt him twice to get refills.
"So," she said as she settled back onto her bench, pushing his third glass towards him and retaining a firm grip on her own. "Do you like anyone?"
Jack choked.
"Is that a yes?"
"What brought this on?" he demanded after recovering his breath.
Karen shrugged. "You've been here for nearly two seasons now. You know everyone, everyone likes you...so who's that special someone?" she grinned, leaning across the table in a comradely manner, wagging an eyebrow at him.
"Is it Elli? She's cute, and she cooks good,"
"I like her allright..." Jack said, wondering what this was about.
"What about Popuri? She's hot, and she knows a lot about plants,"
"She's nice enough..."
"Maria? Take off those glasses, and she's a real cutie. And smart!"
"I don't really know Maria..."
"Ann? She's a tomboy, but she's still cute."
"Um...I don't really like her like that..."
"I see..."
Karen studied him with knowing green eyes. "Well then...who do you like?"
Cliff... the name whispered across his thoughts before he had time to think, causing his mind to reel. "No one, really," is what he said to Karen, who simply raised one eyebrow and smiled.
"I see," she said again, taking a last long pull of her wine, downing the remainder in three quick gulps. "I've got to get back to work," she said, standing. "I hope we can have another talk again soon!" Smiling, she stood, taking her glass, and made her way back to the counter, where she began a quiet conversation with Duke. Jack remained seated for a few minutes, staring into his half-full glass. Finally, he finished his drink, stood, and made his way quietly out the door to begin weaving his way home.
To Be Continued
Author's Notes Special thanks to dJeu for the lovely feedback and criticism. I really, really appreciate it.
Is it any better? ;
Um...so yes. I didn't realize Jack would realize his feelings for Cliff
so soon...But it'll probably work just fine with my plan for this story
anyway. Jack's a little slow on the uptake, as I think I've already
established...He's going to be slow working out his feelings on this
particular matter as well.
As always, I like comments almost as much as I like critical feedback Which is a lot. See you in chapter 5.