The Wolf and Sheep in Me
Dedicated to Alice the Raven, Bald as Malak, and Trillian4210
Darth Revan was restless. The Star Forge held her in a way that was both a comfort and a cage. She paced, imagining the bars pressing ever inward, but a creeping fear chased away any thought of escape. Here, at least, she could fool herself into believing she was the Master.
Again she paced into the corner, and pressed her fevered brow into the cool wall. How ironic that such a small comfort was all this factory could provide. She was so tired, feeling as though the Forge, or the Force or... something was pulling her in a million different directions. Then, there was Malak.
Revan could feel him without effort as he moved about the Forge. He, too, was restless. Rage rolled off of him, through the Forge, and over her without check. She knew the others felt it too, Force-sensitive or no. It made her knees go weak and, for the first time, she was afraid.
She didn't know why she had rebuked him the way she did. The look on his face, the shock, then the hate. He had never looked at her like that before. Why had she been so angry? He had only parroted back HER teachings, HER philosophies.
No ambition...
He provided no insight, nothing. Malak was nothing more than a crude replica of her. The Sith in her was disgusted, the Jedi in her was disappointed. After her... display, Malak had stormed out. The Jedi had been proud of his control, but the Sith knew better. She knew that he was coming to her, the Apprentice to the Master.
Apprentice... Her thoughts returned again to the Jedi. She would have chosen a Padawan by now. Malak had no loyalty, certainly no affection for the one he reluctantly called his master.
HK watched her pace with growing alarm. Revan knew he had no love for Malak, a trait she had not programed into him. Perhaps he knew better than she the fear harbored in her heart. Malak hated the droid. Maybe HK's dark humor was beyond him. More than once HK had volunteered to eliminate him, in his presence no less.
Suddenly Revan's knees seemed to give out. Malak was nearly to her quarters. She excused HK, much to his dismay. She reached for the cloak and mask, paused, and instead pulled on a simple robe. She looked in a mirror at the reflection of a scared, sleepless Jedi. She decided that, if she was to die, perhaps this was the proper way to go.
The door slid open, and there was Malak. Revan tried to remember the Jedi calm as Malak ignited his lightsaber. Red, as blood. She activated her own, surprised to find the bright green blade in her hand. This lightsaber, this was her first. The saber she had constructed at the Jedi Temple on Coruscant. When had she clipped that to her belt?
Without a word Malak swung into attack. Revan retaliated in a detached manner, noting that Malak had so much passion and so little finesse. For minutes that seemed to last forever, they traded blows. Malak grew increasingly aggressive as Revan continued to stay on the defense. Suddenly Malak pushed her away, immediately following with a lightning attack. Revan screamed, and everything went to Hell.
Immediately HK stormed into the room, firing away. Malak retaliated with another Force Lightning, frying the droid. Then Revan snapped. That was HER droid, her FRIEND. She grabbed Malak with the Force, lifting him up as she crushed his throat. She imagined her eyes were probably glowing bright red now, as she felt the life leaving her apprentice. She threw him as hard as she could, then, feeling her anger draining, her strength falling away, she moved towards HK, crouching to analyze the damage.
Malak recovered fast, his anger fueling the Force. With Revan distracted, he quickly made his move. It was only by the reflection on HK's polished armor that Revan was warned of Malak's attack. Adrenaline and fear swung her around, lightsaber in hand, under his guard, catching him full in the face. His lightsaber singed her hair, then fell away. Malak fell away.
Revan rose, moving towards her fallen follower. She had moved fast enough that the wound still bled sluggishly. Eventually he would bleed out, unless she saved time and killed him now.
His blood stained her robes. Her Jedi robes. The calm she had maintained early in the battle hadn't saved her. The Force hadn't saved her. Only an animal reaction fueled by fear had felled Malak. That revelation depressed her more than anything else.
Her soldiers finally arrived. Revan watched the wide array of reactions etched upon their faces. One brave soul asked if she had any orders. Revan laughed at this, a hollow laugh. She felt so drained, so tired, but there was too much to be done. She ordered HK to be repaired as soon as possible, for he had a mission to be fulfilled, an assassination. Then she ordered her ship to be readied. The Jedi were coming for her, no doubt that bitch Bastilla would be one of them.
Malak was going into shock. Once she had possessed the ability to heal, as well as the desire. As she removed the stained robes and donned her characteristic garments, she watched as his minimal color drained away. Silently she covered him with the discarded robes.
She took her Padawan lightsaber, opened it, and shattered the crystal against the wall. She then called her other lightsaber, her more fitting lightsaber, to her. Before pulling on her gloves she placed both hands upon her apprentice and channeled the last whispers of her Jedi training into him. The wound healed, slowly, but there was too much damage, his lower jaw was burned away. The damage was irreversible, but he would live.
The job completed, she pulled on her gloves, her cloak, her mask, and left. She left the Star Forge to met the Jedi as a Sith Lord, feeling that the compassion to her apprentice had been her last act as a Jedi. No longer did she have to feel as two people. The Jedi in her was dead. The Jedi she was about face were dead. And when she returned to the Forge she would kill Malak using the Force that was HERS to command.