Syaoran Li stomped down the pavement with a fuming scowl on his face, wondering why in blazes that his car engine would suddenly and inconveniently choose to break down in the middle of the street when he was about to have one of the most important trials of his career. He HAD to reach the courtroom and FAST before the clock struck two...which left him a total of fifteen minutes to spare, dammit!
Still, he couldn't hate his beloved car. He'd worked hard to earn it. It was a representation of his uphill struggle and dedication in achieving his long-time dream of becoming a successful attorney turned reality at the remarkable age of twenty-three. No, he just blamed it all on bad karma and lousy timing!
As he rounded a curve, he felt a sharp sting bite into his left foot. "Ouch!" He winced, stopped in mid-step and glared at his pained foot. Damn. Some stone must have somehow found its way into his shoe. Wonderful; more reasons to get himself late! With an infuriated groan, he leaned against something solid to balance his body while he grabbed his left shoe off his foot.
As it happened, a young woman with bouncy auburn curls was walking down the lane as well. She was listening to her walkman, nodding her head along with the music and humming to herself. Her attention was diverted when she heard the cry of pain and she glanced at the dark-haired man whose hand was on the fuse box and shaking like he was being...
Her green eyes rounded as her hands clamped her mouth. Oh God! The poor man was being ELECTROCUTED!
Syaoran was cursing in every way he knew how as he attempted to shake the stupid nugget out of his shoe. Just as the troublesome granite fell out and he shoved his shoe back to his foot, he heard soft footsteps hurrying from behind him.
"STAY RIGHT THERE! I'M COMING!"
His amber eyes widened as he saw a petite young girl running down the road in a panic, holding a plank high in the air and screaming, "DON'T WORRY! I'LL SAVE YOU!" Is she suffering from some mental disease or something? His wry musings were cut short when he realized the bizarre female was heading in HIS direction!
"What the heck---?" Syaoran's jaw dropped open as she stopped right in front of him. "Hey, WAIT! W-What do you think you're DOING?"
But he was too late...
SMACK! The board landed squarely on his poor hand.
It took a moment for the surprise and the excruciating pain to sink in. And when they did, his pain-filled screams could be heard all over the neighborhood.
"Oops."
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A Comedy of Errors
Prologue
-Specially dedicated to Amy-chan, for her support and friendship-
The first time they met, Sakura had single-handedly broken Syaoran's hand and dumped quick-drying cement into his car by mistake. Then, by some cruel twist of fate, they ended up having their peaceful vacation under the same roof with each other AND their 'slightly' deranged family members for a whole month! But the worst mistake Sakura ever made was probably to somehow fall for the jerk when he's already ENGAGED! Talk about a comedy of errors...
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Tomoeda, Japan
"How does the defendant plead---guilty or not guilty?"
The elderly stipendiary magistrate seated on his raised dais stared at the petite girl with the brilliant green eyes who stood in the dock. Brushing a slim, nervous hand through her cloud of golden-brown hair, she hesitated for a moment.
"Have I really got to choose one or the other?" she asked, looking uneasy. "I mean, can't I just say: I'm sort of guilty...but it was all a big misunderstanding!"
"I'm sorry but that won't do," he told her firmly.
"But I've promised to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. So why can't I just explain what happened?"
The magistrate sighed, adjusting the glasses that was slipping down his nose and peered down at the documents in front of him. "Do you intend to represent yourself in this court, Miss Kinomoto?"
"Sure---why not? You need to give me a chance to explain what actually happened. You'll see to it that I'll have a fair trial, won't you?" she asked, giving the magistrate a big, pleading smile designed to melt even the coldest of hearts...except one.
"Oh, this is a waste of time! Of COURSE she's guilty! I caught her red-handed, didn't I?" The 'one' was a handsome young man with stormy topaz eyes and tousled reddish-brown locks who kept glaring kitchen knives and daggers at the girl in the dock. Besides his physically fit body and good looks, he looked almost perfect...if it weren't for the sling on his shoulder to support his injured right hand. This hand, he thought angrily, is merely further proof that this woman is the stupidest and most demented female on the face of the planet!
But an injury to his hand was one thing, hurt his precious car and you've made yourself a lifelong enemy with Syaoran Li! And in his book, Sakura Kinomoto had definitely become Public Enemy No. 1.
"Very well, Miss Kinomoto, please tell me your version of what happened."
Sakura nodded, smiling gratefully at the magistrate. "Thank you, sir. I did make the most dreadful mistake, and I truly AM so very sorry that I picked the wrong car." She cast a nervous sideways glance at the glowering Syaoran sitting on a bench across the courtroom.
"What RUBBISH! She wasn't at all sorry!" Syaoran muttered darkly as he recalled the stark horror he felt when he saw the condition his prized car was in after the murderess was done with it. He gritted his teeth. He was going to enjoy putting her behind bars.
"Oh, calm down, Syaoran. You're exaggerating. Surely such a lovely angel couldn't have harmed even a fly," Eriol Hiiragizawa said without taking his eyes off Sakura. He was Syaoran's solicitor, cousin and friend. However, he wasn't being too helpful at the moment with his constantly giving their enemy the goo-goo eyes.
Syaoran rolled his eyes. "I'm telling you, Hiiragizawa, she's a devil in disguise and I have the evidence to prove it! Let her struggle to wheedle her way out of this." The evidence is too damning anyway, he thought smugly, but I'd like to see her try and fail.
Sakura took a deep breath and began, "It all started seven days ago. I was at home, waiting for my boyfriend Maximillion Carter to come and pick me up for our date..."
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Twenty-three year old Sakura Kinomoto sat on her living room couch, thrumming her fingers rhythmically on the surface of the coffee-table beside her with a frown. That frown darkened when she glanced at her wristwatch and realized it now pointed to four o'clock; two hours since her boyfriend had promised to come and get her for their date.
Carter isn't coming...
Tick-tock. Tick-tock.
Carter is a DEAD man.
No, calm down, Sakura, her inner voice cautioned. There's no point in overreacting just because he's a little late. Who knows? Maybe he got waylaid by traffic? Maybe his mother is sick and dying and he desperately needs to be by her side? Or maybe---
Or MAYBE he just plain FORGOT! Her jade green eyes narrowed as she recalled the last time he promised to pick her up for their dinner date. She had gotten herself all dressed up in an attractive green off the shoulder gown, waiting patiently for FIVE hours until her oh-so-considerate boyfriend phoned to inform her that he 'forgot' because he had been too preoccupied with 'work'.
Sakura had been willing to forgive him...then. But he'd used that same lame excuse one too many times for every other date he'd broken with her. And if it wasn't THAT excuse, he'd use the 'my-mother-is-sick-and-I-need-to-tend-to-her' gambit. Okay, she could understand that. What she DIDN'T feel so understanding about is why he always gave her his excuses hours AFTER their promised date.
Tick-tock. Tick-tock.
"THAT'S IT!" Tired of waiting for a man who would in all probability never come, Sakura jumped to her feet, grabbed her handphone---a birthday gift from her best friend and cousin, Tomoyo Daidouji---off her desk top and proceeded to dial his number.
"I'm sorry, but the phone number you have dialed cannot be reached at this moment...busy tone."
"Ugh! Where IS he?" she fumed in frustration as she slammed her handphone shut. Did he think he could evade her wrath THAT way? Well, if that's the case then he had another think coming!
She marched out of the front door and headed for her car. She was going to chase after him, hunt him down, and then make him squeal like the pig that he was.
If he didn't have a VERY good excuse for her for 'forgetting' their date this time, Sakura was going to let her long overdue anger take control and give in to her homicidal urges for once. And that would NOT be a pretty sight indeed...
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"Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned," Eriol muttered under his breath.
Syaoran crossed his arms. "Humph. I'm not surprised her boyfriend would dump her for another female. That woman belongs in a psycho ward with the rest of her mentally-disturbed friends."
Sakura's eye twitched. "HEY, I HEARD THAT!"
"Well, I can't help it if it's the truth...And the truth hurts, doesn't it?" The amber-eyed attorney gave her a sickening smirk that made her decide to count from one to ten and back.
"There will be no character assassination in this court, Mr. Li," the magistrate rebuked before turning to the cherry blossom. "Please continue."
"As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted," Sakura sent a dark scowl in Syaoran's direction, "I headed for my boyfriend's manor to demand why he never arrived at my place..."
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"I'm sorry, but Master Carter is not in at the moment."
Sakura eyed the butler incredulously. "But his car is here, isn't it? So he should be home," she replied in puzzlement as she pointed to the sleek red sports car Carter owned sitting in the driveway. She knew for a fact that he would always, ALWAYS ride that vehicle whenever he set foot out of his mansion. For the High and Mighty millionaire to actually WALK on FOOT to anywhere was about as likely as him happily giving up all his money to charity.
"Sorry, miss. But he's not in," the elderly butler repeated with a flash of guilt in his eyes before resuming his usual blank façade again. "Perhaps you might come by later in, say, two hours from now?"
"Well, just tell him his girlfriend Sakura Kinomoto wants to see him as soon as he gets home, okay?" she asked with an overly bright smile on her face.
"Very well, I shall inform him later. Good day, Miss Kinomoto."
But as soon as the butler closed the door, Sakura cautiously approached the high fence that covered one side of the manor walls.
Time to see if my athletic skills are still intact from my old high school days, she thought as she took a deep breath and latched on to the fence. She was getting into that mansion if it KILLED her.
After much maneuvering and monkey-climbing (as well as nearly dropping to her death three feet down when she almost lost her footing), Sakura finally made it to the top of the fence where the open window was. She pushed aside the heavy white curtains, prepared to heave her body into whatever empty room it was...until she realized it wasn't as empty as she first thought.
Holy cow! Are those...grunting noises I'm hearing?
She directed her gaze to where the strange sounds were coming from, and was shocked and mortified to discover that she was intruding into the privacy of two people in bed engaging in an M-rated activity that should not be mentioned to youngsters below eighteen, let alone WATCHED. One was a very beautiful blond while the other dark-haired man was...CARTER?
A bad dream...that's right. This...is all...just...a bad dream...
She blinked, desperately hoping against hope...
Nope. The disgusting image was still there.
Fury blazed through her like hot liquid fire as she banged her fisted hands against the window. It was a wonder that it didn't shatter.
"CARTER, YOU UNDERHANDED SKUNK!"
He chose at that exact moment to look up and his jaw dropped open when he saw his girlfriend's enraged teeth-gnashing face promising terrible retribution. "S-Sakura?" he managed to choke out before the girl in question found herself falling backwards when the delicate fence also chose at that exact moment to break under her weight.
Drat. How could she have forgotten that she was suspended five feet in the air with no parachutes to save her if she fell?
With a horrified screech, Sakura along with the fence dropped like a two-ton iron ball into the bushes. Fortunately, she discovered by some miracle that her bones were not broken and that the fence hadn't squashed her to death with its light weight.
The gardener who was tending to the bushes gaped at her. It wasn't everyday that beautiful women fell out of nowhere from the skies.
She grinned sheepishly as she quickly pushed herself to her feet and brushed the dirt of her clothes. "The ladders they make today really aren't as sturdy as they used to be, ha, ha, ha!" she laughed nervously and quickly exited stage right.
The gardener shook his head, clearly questioning her sanity, and resumed his work.
If he only knew the evil thoughts racing inside Sakura's head as she stormed out of her EX-boyfriend's compound in furious strides...
That deceitful, two-timing rat is going to pay DEARLY for this! I'm going to make sure of it!
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"...So let me get this straight," Syaoran broke in with deadly eyes. "You're saying that my poor car was the innocent victim of a lovers' spat!"
The cherry blossom's face flushed deep a tomato red and she poked her two forefingers together sheepishly. "Well, I wouldn't put it like that...exactly. I mean, my feelings for Carter were never that strong and I'm pretty sure the same could be said for him."
"But at least your precious boyfriend didn't ruin other people's property in a fit of self-righteous rage, now did he?" he growled accusingly at her.
The magistrate gave a deep sigh. "Enough, Mr. Li. No more interruptions until the account is concluded. Please carry on, Ms. Kinomoto."
Syaoran grudgingly relented and crossed his arms.
Sakura ignored him and resumed her story.
…………………………………………….
She hadn't planned her revenge this way.
It had been two days since Carter's betrayal. The cheating, lying swine didn't even bother to come apologize and beg for her forgiveness. All the coward did was gave her an SMS message that said: Sorry, baby. These things happen.
Strangely enough, she didn't feel brokenhearted over their breakup. Perhaps she never really loved him, as much as she tried to convince herself that she did in the past. No, all she felt was anger. Not just at Carter for his treachery, but also at herself for being as stupid as to not notice his infidelity until she saw it in front of her two blind eyes!
Now all she could think about was REVENGE!
She told no one of her breakup. She considered telling Tomoyo about it but decided against it. The Daidouji heiress had gone to London to conduct her latest fashion catwalk and Sakura had no wish to disrupt her already hectic schedule. She considered her older brother but when she thought of how Touya would react...
Her overprotective brother would fly all the way from his American university and storm back here just to punch the living daylights out of Carter until the poor man found himself bloodied and unconscious in the Tomoeda hospital with incubators stuck to his battered body.
Not that she minded the scenario but...this was her revenge, and she wanted it done her way.
She tried to formulate the perfect vengeance plan in her mind as she made her way to the grocery store to restock her fridge. But it turned out she hadn't needed to waste so much of her brain molecules after all.
She stopped when her eyes settled on a sports car parked beside the road, a few yards away from a large vehicle carrying fresh cement.
She stared long and hard at the automobile, then at the cement truck, and a sort of brainstorm struck her. She looked in the cab and saw that the careless driver had gone off, leaving the key in the ignition, it didn't take her five seconds to back up the truck, pull a lever---and tip a whole load of cement into the open sports car.
Sweet, sweet revenge...
Wild, hysterical laughter burst from her lips as she watched her ex-boyfriend's precious car disappearing beneath an avalanche of cement. Take that Carter!
"WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING TO MY CAR?"
A young man with a sling on his shoulder suddenly strode over in quick, rapid strides. He looked absolutely horrified as he gazed at the red sports car in disbelief, then his brilliant amber eyes narrowed into dangerous slits and he directed his formidable glare at the bewildered girl still sitting in the truck.
He stomped over to the trunk and flung open the door with his one free hand, looking ready to commit bloody murder. Imagine his shock when he found himself staring into a pair of unforgettable green eyes; green eyes that belonged to the same girl who had maimed his hand!
"It's you..." Syaoran's lips twisted into a sarcastic smile. "Now, why is it that we keep bumping into each other like this?"
Sakura stared at him as the memory of a man cursing her to hell and back for breaking his hand instantly flashed in her mind. She pointed a finger at him in amazement. "Hoe, I know you! You're that same guy whom I met two weeks ago!"
"And I remember you too. It's difficult to forget the face of a psychotic murderess," he spat venomously.
Her eyebrows snapped together. "Listen, I already apologized for that little mistake I made. I was just trying to help. I really thought you were being electrocuted!"
"Do you expect me to believe that far-fetched story?" Syaoran snarled. "Because of YOU, I was officially LATE for my trial! And look at my hand! It will take months before it is completely healed again! And NOW---" he turned and gestured to his car buried under the cement--- "you busted MY CAR!"
Sakura blinked. "T-This is...your car?"
"I sincerely hope you're not deaf as well as crazy," he snapped. "Yes, it's MY car!" I can't even leave it for TEN STINKING SECONDS without something happening to it, he thought furiously. Never again will he ever leave his car in the open for insane murderers to get their hands on it. One in particular was the green-eyed witch who'd been jinxing him since the day he met her!
With a weak smile, she sheepishly let go of the lever that had doomed his car with cement. "I-I didn't know. Honestly, I thought it was someone else's car."
The look on his stormy face said: Do I look like a stupid, gullible fool to you?
She flinched. "I'm SO sorry! Please forgive me! There's a perfectly logical explanation behind all this. You see --"
"I don't want to listen to any more of your meaningless apologies and lame excuses. Just tell me WHY in blazes are you stalking me and making my life miserable?"
"Stalking you?" Sakura's eyes sparked green fire, her guilt quickly overcome by irritation. "What an utterly chauvinistic and conceited remark! You think you're so gorgeous that I'll degrade myself by stalking someone like you?" She leaned over and inspected his face up and down, her face totally indifferent. "Well, buddy, I think my high school biology lab partner is a better looker than you ANY DAY!"
The insult incensed Syaoran and his pride but a quick glance made him realize they were now beginning to gain the attention of a crowd. Forget it, he fumed, she's going to pay one way or another.
She narrowed her eyes when he suddenly smiled too calmly for her liking and pulled out a card from his pocket of his suit, placing it in her hand. "I'll see you in court."
Sakura glared hotly at his retreating back; lips trembling with rage, surprise and guilt. In truth, she couldn't exactly blame him for being angry since she'd damaged his car and hand. Still...couldn't the guy just forgive and forget? Or at least give her a chance to explain? She looked at the rectangular card clutched in her hand and her jaw fell wide open.
Syaoran Li
Hong Kong Attorney at law
Tel no: insert nine digits
Fax no: insert nine digits
She recalled reading from People magazine about a Hong Kong lawyer with a similar name. He was reputed to be one of the world's finest and brightest lawyers and, as of yet, he had never lost a case. She stared at the name printed on the card for a long moment, then banged her head against the horn, making it blare long and loud.
Great! Just great! Accosted by two of earth's biggest jerks in the space of two days and facing legal action by one of China's most successful (and possibly one of the world's finest) lawyers.
As anyone else who was in her shoes facing as bleak a fate as her own, she summed up her dire predicament with two simple words:
This sucks.
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"...And that's exactly what happened."
Sakura ended her story and silently prayed that they would believe it. It was the truth, after all. On the other hand, Syaoran Li still looked as if he was one step away from throttling her to death.
"The stupid girl didn't even read my license plate, which nobody would have mistaken for anyone else's!" Syaoran growled.
She flinched. "I was too caught up in my anger to notice, Mr. Li. I'm terribly sorry."
"Sorry isn't going to bring my car back from the dead!"
The magistrate cleared his throat. "Since it appears, Miss Kinomoto that you're prepared to admit you are guilty..."
"Of course," the auburn-haired girl interrupted, vigorously nodding her head. "I'm completely prepared to admit that I committed---what do you call it?---'malicious damage'? And I've paid the insurance company for the loss of the car. However, I do want to declare to the court that it was all a horrible mistake; that I had no malevolent intention of wrecking Mr. Li's car; and...Well, I guess I'd like to apologize again and tell Mr. Li how dreadfully sorry I am," she added, cringing when she felt Syaoran's cold, unforgiving eyes drilling holes into her.
The magistrate peered down at the clerk of the court. "Do we have any further information on this matter?"
The clerk rose from his seat. "Yes, sir. I understand that the insurance company has been paid in full."
"Well, in that case..."
"That's it! I can't take it anymore!" Syaoran gritted his teeth and leaped to his feet. "This afternoon has been a total waste of my precious time and life! That evil witch under an angel's mask not only gets let off the hook, but she's made me the laughingstock of the entire court! I REFUSE to stay here a moment longer!"
Eriol arched an elegant eyebrow at his infuriated friend. "Well, you have to admit, you're didn't do too badly," he mused, "At least your insurance company has been paid and you can always buy another sports car. By the way, I do believe that is the first case you've ever lost in your entire career. I can see it in the headlines now. Syaoran Li, one of the most distinguished lawyers in Hong Kong, lost his first case to a little miss who covered his car in cement. Why I do believe it's a historical moment."
"Shut up, Hiiragizawa," Syaoran threw his so-called 'friend' the evil eye and made his way out of the courtroom.
The only consolation I've possibly attained from this whole ridiculous episode, he seethed as he slammed the door behind him and stomped away, is that as soon as I leave Japan, I'll never have to set eyes on that crazy fool of a woman ever again!
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(TBC)