Chapter 15: Padmé's Fear

Padmé woke up and looked over her shoulder to find that Anakin was gone. She got out of bed and got changed. She then looked out the window and smiled to see Ryoo and Pooja playing with the twins. "They are beautiful," a voice commented. Padmé turned to see Jobal standing there.

"Thanks, Anakin and I both love them so much," Padmé stated.

"I bet you do," Jobal agreed.

Jobal however, could see the sadness in her daughter's eyes. "What's wrong, Padmé?" Jobal asked. Padmé sighed as she sat down on the bed.

"Mom, I'm afraid," she told her.

"What are you afraid of?" Jobal asked.

"It's Ani, mom. He just can't get him to forgive himself. Even though Obi-Wan, Sabé, and I forgave him for what he did, but he just can't forgive himself."

Jobal touched her daughter's face. "Sweet heart, let him take the time to heal. Even though you forgave him, he needs time to for him to be able to forgive himself," she assured her.

"I'm just scared that I won't get my Anakin back," Padmé told her.

"Just give him time," Jobal advised.

Padmé nodded before Jobal got up to leave.

Later that day, Anakin and Ruwee came home and Anakin saw Padmé outside with their children. "Don't you hurt my daughter, Anakin, she's been through enough," Ruwee stated.

"I won't hurt her, sir, I've already been punished for hurting the people I love," Anakin assured him.

Ruwee watched as Anakin went to talk to Padmé.

Padmé looked up to see that Anakin and her father had come home and she sent Luke and Leia inside. That's when Anakin could feel and see that something was wrong. "What is it, Padmé?" He asked. Padmé grabbed his hand and led him towards the gardens to talk to him.

They sat down on a bench and she had her hands folded her lap when Anakin reached over to hold her hand. "Padmé, tell me, what's wrong?" He asked. She knew she should come right out and say it.

"Anakin, I'm afraid," she replied.

He looked at her confused. "We have all forgiven you for what you have done, but you're still punishing yourself. Why? Why can't you let yourself let go of the past?" She asked. Anakin sighed as he let her hand go and looked inside the house to see the twins sitting in the living room with Ruwee, Jobal, Sola, Ryoo, and Pooja. It looked like Jobal and Sola were singing to the twins.

"Look at your family, Padmé. Look at how happy they are. You have a family. Your family's alive. I destroyed many systems, I killed many families. If I didn't kill families, I destroyed them in someway. I took a son, a daughter, a brother, a husband, or a wife. Either way I had people suffer and it's my fault, Padmé. I did all of this for power," he explained.

Padmé listened to him, she wasn't expecting to hear all of this. "Some days, I just wish Obi-Wan would just destroy me. Not a day goes by when I don't think about that time I choked you and it was because I thought you betrayed me. When I betrayed you. I betrayed you, our children, and my friends. I killed my friends. I killed them all, even the children. Not a night goes by when I don't hear those children screaming for help and I ended their lives like they were nothing. Some days I just wish Obi-Wan just killed me," he explained. Padmé gasped and got on her knees in front of him.

"Please don't say anything like that, I beg you, Ani. Please don't ever wish for death," she begged.

She placed her hands on his face with tears in her eyes. "Anakin, I forgave you for that night. I forgave you lying to me. I forgave you for taking Luke and kidnapping us. We all did. Please, come back to me," she whispered. Anakin sighed as he lowered his head and she pressed her forehead against his. "Let me help you," she added. He wrapped his arms around her and they just held each other.

That night, Anakin was lying in bed looking out the window while holding his wife. He could suddenly hear their screams again. "SOMEBODY PLEASE! HELP US! HELP US!" They echoed. Anakin sat up and walked over to the window. He pulled on his robe and went to the gardens to at least meditate to get his mind off of everything.

Anakin entered the gardens and kneeled down and started to meditate. "Clear your mind you must. In order to find your destiny, you must," Yoda's voice instructed.

Padmé woke up the next morning and found that her husband was gone. She got up and pulled on her robe. She walked outside and saw Anakin meditating in the garden. She went to go inside when his voice filled her ears.

"Don't go," he insisted.

She turned and looked at him. "I didn't want to disturb you, especially now," she told him.

"Your presence is soothing, especially now," he assured her.

"Have you been out here all night?" She asked.

"I have."

"Why?"

"Couldn't sleep."

She kneeled down next to him and he grabbed her hand. "Just stay with me," he murmured. She nodded and waited for him to finish. She knew what he was doing and all she could was hope that her Anakin would come back to her. She hoped that he would be able to forgive himself and move on.