A Fool To Think

Chapter Twenty-Two

"Hey, ready to go?" Martin asked as he approached Danny that night. He was looking forward to having some time with Danny so that he could get his opinion on this situation with Sam. Although he knew that Danny would probably tease him about his interest in Sam, he felt like he needed another perspective. And who better to give that to him than Sam's new best friend?

"Actually," Danny frowned, "I'm not. I still have some more paperwork that I need to get done before I can leave."

"Oh. Ok." Martin answered. "How long do you think it will take you to finish?"

"I don't really know." Danny told him. "Why don't you and Sam go on ahead and I'll meet you there?"

"Sam?" Martin questioned.

"Yeah. I kind of invited her along." Danny replied. "That's not a problem, is it?"

"I thought that we were going to dinner, just us guys." Martin objected.

"We were." Danny explained. "But then I found out that Sam didn't have any plans for tonight and I didn't feel right about not including her. That isn't a major problem, is it?"

"No, I guess not." Martin answered, even though he was slightly annoyed with Danny for inviting Sam along.

"Great." Danny smiled. "So like I said, why don't you and Sam go on ahead to the restaurant and I'll meet you two there in about a half hour?"

"Ok." Martin sighed. He could spend a half hour alone with Sam. After all, he had been paired with her practically all day without any incidents. Of course they had been working. Now they would have to make small talk and wouldn't have work to use as a crutch.

"Hey." Sam greeted as she returned from her run to the tech room.

"Hey." Danny greeted. "I just told Martin that I have to finish this report for Jack and I'll meet you two at the restaurant. Ok?"

Sam looked over at Martin as if to ask him if he was ok with this and found that he was staring at Danny's desk, avoiding her gaze. She knew that he probably wasn't looking forward to spending time with her alone and could tell that she made him uncomfortable.

She considered backing out and telling them that she wasn't in the mood to go out and was just going to grab some take-out, but reconsidered. Danny would come to the restaurant as soon as he was done and then he could act as their buffer and would be able to make the situation less uncomfortable for Martin.

"Ok." She nodded, giving them a small smile. "You ready?"

"Sure." He nodded, following her to the elevator. But he stopped and went back to Danny for a moment. "This better not be some kind of trick."

"Trick?" Danny laughed nervously. "What kind of trick would it be?"

"Oh I think you know exactly what kind of trick it would be." Martin explained. "I'm going to be timing you. You have a half hour starting now." He looked at his watch to mark the time.

"Just go!" Danny laughed, pushing him towards the elevator.

"I'm timing you!" Martin called out as he went to catch up with Sam.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah." Danny shook his head. He should have known that Martin would catch on to his scheme. He had no intention of meeting them at the restaurant. As soon as he was certain that they were gone, he was going to leave for a date. Then he'd call them later and tell them that he was still swamped with work and encourage them to go ahead and eat since they were already at the restaurant together.

He hoped that if they could have a nice dinner together and talk, maybe they would be able to work out some of the problems they had. Maybe Martin would be able to see how much he misses Sam and then he'd be willing to give her another chance. Or at least see how sorry she truly is and forgive her. Either one would be nice.

When Martin and Sam got to the restaurant they managed to get a booth big enough for three since they thought Danny would be joining them. After ordering their drinks and making small talk about the menu, they soon found themselves sitting together in silence.

Martin found it hard not to stare at her and had to focus his attention on the napkin sitting in front of him instead. He had realized that this was probably just one of Danny's good intentioned tricks to get him and Sam back together or at least to be friends again.

The chances of Danny actually walking through that door within the next eight minutes were extremely slim. So that begged the question if Martin knew all of this, why did he agree to come? Why not just back out, grab a pizza, and watch ESPN?

The answer to that was simple. As nervous and uncomfortable as it may make him, he couldn't pass up the opportunity to have dinner with Sam.

"So," Sam started to say as she searched for a topic that they could talk about while waiting for Danny. She hated even bringing this up, but didn't know of anything else to bring up. "How's Caroline?"

"Fine." Martin nodded, finding it slightly awkward to talk about Caroline with her. Without thinking, he added, "I'm thinking about breaking up with her."

"Really?" Sam really hoped that there wasn't a big smile on her face as she asked that. She was trying to be supportive about his relationship with Caroline and having a big smile on her face about this wouldn't be supportive.

"Yeah." Martin nodded, tearing off a corner of his paper napkin and rolling it up into a ball.

"If you don't mind me asking, why?" She couldn't be happier that he was thinking about breaking up with Caroline but did wonder why.

He was about to say 'because she's not you', but caught himself before it came out of his mouth. "Well I just don't think that she's what I'm looking for. For one thing, she doesn't want a serious relationship."

"And you do." Sam guessed.

"Actually, yeah I do." Martin opened up. "I want to live the married life, complete with a couple of kids and a large mortgage. I've wanted that for many years and now there's nothing stopping me from finding it."

She closed her eyes and looked down when she heard his statement. Even in college Martin was excited about starting a family. While it hadn't been such an important goal to her then, she found that she was starting to want that too.

But she had ruined her chances to have a family with the one guy that she wanted a family with. Although she tried to be optimistic, and believed that maybe they could eventually form a friendship that wasn't awkward and uncomfortable, she doubted that they would ever find a way to be together again.

And it was all because of her stupidity. She cursed herself for her behavior in the past and felt the familiar sting of tears forming. Not wanting Martin to see her cry, she excused herself to go to the restroom.

Martin stayed at the table, feeling bad about what he said because it obviously hurt her feelings. It wasn't even true because there was something stopping him from finding someone to settle down with. He still loved her. Although sometimes he wished he didn't, he did and he couldn't see that changing anytime soon.

When his cell phone started ringing, he knew it was probably Danny telling him that he wasn't coming. "Hello?"

"Hey man." Danny's voice came through from the other end of the connection.

"You're not coming, are you?" Martin asked.

"Well I still have a lot of work…" Danny lied.

"No you don't." Martin called him on his lie. "You're probably out with a woman right now, aren't you?"

"Maybe." Danny laughed. "What gave it away? The background music?"

"No. I just know you too well." Martin answered. "I saw through this little trick from the beginning."

"So then why did you agree to it?" Danny questioned. "Oh, I can answer that for you. You wanted to be alone with Sam but you were afraid to just ask her to dinner."

"I'm not afraid of anything." Martin protested.

"Ok, you were…hesitant." Danny compromised. "Anyway, the point is I have given you a perfect opportunity to talk to Sam alone and away from the pressure confines of work. Enjoy it and don't say anything stupid."

"Too late for that." Martin mumbled. "I think I've already said something that made her practically run for the ladies' room."

"Way to go." Danny sarcastically replied, sighing heavily. "Do you still love her?"

Martin was caught off guard by Danny's bold question. "What?"

"Do you still love Samantha?" Danny repeated his question.

"I don't want to talk about this…"

"Answer the question Martin." Danny demanded.

Even though Danny really couldn't force him to answer, Martin still somehow felt compelled to go ahead with Danny's request. "Yeah. I do." He replied softly. "So what?"

"So what?" Danny exclaimed. "Martin, she still loves you. She's always loved you. But she made a couple of bad and huge mistakes. And really, who hasn't? I'm sure you've made mistakes that have hurt people and you would take them back if you could, right?"

"Yeah, but…"

"I'm not finished." Danny interrupted. "Now where was I?" Martin's interruption threw him off for a moment but he soon recovered his train of thought. "Oh yeah. She loves you and you love her. Don't you think that's enough to at least try and build something around?"

"I don't know…"

"Well I do." Danny laughed. "She feels terrible about what she did to you and about not believing in you. But in your attempt to separate yourself from her, I think there's something that you've forgotten about."

"Really?" Martin asked. "And what's that?"

"You're not the only one sitting at that table whose dreams were ruined and whose heart was broken when Sam left you. Have you even thought about what she went through? Not only did she leave you behind but she also had to deal with the aftermath of Alex and his website."

Sam had told him a lot about what she went through in the months following her break up with Martin. He knew that she had a hard time dealing with the fact that she was exploited like that on the internet for anyone to see. "That took a huge toll on her and it was only made worse by the fact that she thought you were the one behind it."

"So what exactly are you saying?" Martin asked.

"I'm saying that you aren't the only victim in this mess. You aren't the only one with emotional scars. She has them too. You just have to know where to look for them. Think about it." Danny told him. "But I've got to get back to the lovely Diana, so I'll talk to you later."

"Bye." Martin hung up the phone and placed it back in his coat pocket. To be honest, he really hadn't thought about what Sam must have gone through. Maybe it was time to find out.