The little squirrel Barkbutt skipped across the bright summer lawn happily, swinging a basket of wotsitberries at his side. He had been busy that day and was eager to show his mother what he had gathered. Looping the basket handle over one shoulder, he scaled their treehouse like an arrow shot from a bow… and stopped dead at the entrance.
Or, at least, his parents were stopped dead. In a more literal sense than the Dibbun squirrel would have liked. They lay sprawled on the wooden floor, horribly slain. Barkbutt, through his incredible sense of smell, knew at once that five foxes had been inside, and it was they who had killed his parents.
…Never mind how five foxes got up into a squirrel drey; that's not crucial to the plot.
Anyway, Barkbutt's cute little Dibbun eyes swelled with tears - and became a peculiar shade of crimson. Battlelust in a beast so young? Of course! With a roar of sorrow, the babe hefted his father's bow (which was twice his weight) over his head and vowed, "I swears to makea pincushion outta d'fox wot killed me daddy 'n' mum!"
Cut to a scene about twenty seasons later. Barkbutt, now a muscular adult squirrel, flitted through the trees. He was tracking a fox. This fox probably had nothing to do with his parents, but it made him feel happy to be chasing it anyway.
The fox looked over his shoulder and saw the squirrel was still hot on his trail. Whimpering in panic, he tried to push himself to go faster… but conveniently tripped over a log. In an instant, Barkbutt had stopped and nocked an arrow to his bowstring. Before the fox could cry for mercy, he was impaled by twenty arrows.
Barkbutt snickered, congratulating himself for his great skill… especially since he was self-trained. Leaping to the ground, he retrieved his arrows and frisked the slain fox for identification. He found a tag inside its ragged tunic collar, which read: "Official Minion of Vulpine Killers - 'We Murder Squirrel Families for Less!'" It then proceeded to give a location… which Barkbutt memorized, eyes burning in rage. Here was the crucial clue! Now he could find the foxes and avenge his parents!
"North Broadstream… fifth pine on your right…" Barkbutt mumbled to himself. "Ah, here we go… a brownstone castle, with sinister-looking gates. Here it is!" Unshouldering his bow, the squirrel warrior dashed inside.
"Ah… what have we here? A squirrel?" It was the lead fox, the one whose scent Barkbutt remembered especially well from that sorrowful day twenty seasons ago. He sat on a glided throne with his brothers and sisters, stroking his short whiskers and staring at Barkbutt. "Odd for a squirrel to show up for our services. You have a mother-in-law you'd like us to dispose of?"
The warrior squirrel snorted and fit an arrow to his bowstring. "I would never dream of doing business with you, vermin! You killed my family when I was a kid… and I hope to return the favor!"
The lead fox sighed and pulled a rope next to his throne. "Again? Man, I would never have got into this business if I'd known how persistent the survivors were at this 'revenge' thing." Pulling the rope caused a bell to ring loudly. As the noise died off, the lead fox leaned forward with an evil grin.
Barkbutt looked about him in shock as a horde of ninja weasels poured from every door and surrounded him. "Ninja weasels? Haven't these been used before?"
The lead fox shrugged. "Eh, yeah…. But they're better armed now. Besides, the phrase itself was so fun to say I couldn't help but hire 'em. 'Ninja weasels,' ee hee hee…"
The redness overtook Barkbutt and he began firing arrows madly. He didn't know how long after it was when his vision cleared. He panted in exhaustion as he looked around. Each weasel was pinned neatly between the eyes with one of his shafts. Man, so many arrows…
Barkbutt grabbed at his quiver and found it still full. "All right! Looks like Martin the Warrior has blessed me with Legolas' never-ending quiver! Now I can…" But he stopped short as he noticed the foxes slumped in their thrones, also dispatched with arrows.
"Aww man…" Barkbutt complained, kicking a helmet moodily. "I had a speech for 'em, too. Killed 'em much too fast, I did."
As he left the empty castle, the squirrel stumbled across a beautiful squirrel maid. They fell in love at once and decided to live out their days at Redwall. And so Barkbutt the Warrior entered Redwall, peacefully relinquished his bow, and lived there until the day he died, finally content (and with an ever-expanding waistline from the constant feasting). A happy ending indeed.