Chapter Two: How Not to Kidnap a Princess

Shiara was just trying to cook dinner, (she wasn't particularly good at it...), when there was a loud knock on the door.

Whirling around, the fire witch glared daggers at it. This was the third time she had been interrupted in one night. She was about to slam the door open and yell at the idiot out there to go away before she told a dragon to eat him, but she calmed herself. No, it wouldn't due to scream and yell. She had to be polite...

Shiara stomped over to the door and threw it open. "What do you want?"

Just as she had suspected, a knight stood there.

"I-I'm here to rescue Princess Shiara from a dragon...is she in?"

"I'm Shiara, you nitwit, but I'm not a princess. Now, if you would, please leave me alone. Kazul wants something called Cherries Jubilee, which apparently Cimorene was good at making, and I think I've already messed it up..."

"Oh...uh... Cherries Jubilee? That's my favorite. You can't possibly mess it up." The knight said, attempting to be polite.

"I put vinegar in instead of vanilla."

"Ah. No, that would about do it."

"Great, that means I have to start over..." Shiara sighed. you leave...say, now?"

"R-right away..." The knight hurried off.

The fire witch slammed the door behind him and went off to restart Kazul's dessert.

xxxxx

I suppose I might have been chosen because I was the only one who was willing to leave his staff behind. I actually wanted to get rid of the darn thing...

Apparently, dragons were allergic to wizard staffs, so I was the obvious choice to kidnap the girl.

It would be easy, the wizards assured me, heroes rescued princesses all the time. If they could do it, then surely I could.

I wanted to remind them that heroes also happened to have nice, sharp weapons, and all I had was a few rocks I had picked up on the way.

No, all in all, this wasn't turning out very good.

To top it all off, another wizard had written down what I was supposed to say, and half way there I realized I couldn't even read his handwriting.

So much for an easy job...

xxxxx

Shiara was just carefully adding the cherries when there came a few, faint knocks on the door.

She dropped the bag of cherries and stared incredulously at the entrance. Four rescuers in one evening? It was unheard of. It was also very distracting, and very rude, and Shiara had a mind to tell them so.

The fire witch strode over to the door and flung it open. "Do you know how hard it is to make a dessert for a dragon when people keep interrupting me all the time? Don't you idiots ever get it into your head that I don't want to be rescued? If you truly want to rescue some slip of a princess, go next door. She's been bugging me for ages."

Shiara finished and got her first real look at the person.

She looked him up and down, and then said quite bluntly, "You don't even look like a prince. Or a hero, for that matter."

The young man grinned weakly. "I think I'll take that as a compliment."

"So if you're not here to rescue me, why are you here?" the fire witch demanded.

"Uhm..." the man squinted at a little piece of paper. "I've come to give you a nap...no, that's not it...I've come to check on the kids...shoot, no...Er... Ah! Yes, of course. I've come to kidnap you."

Shiara snorted. "Oh, yeah? Well, you're certainly doing a good job of it."

"Am I?" he asked vaguely. "Well, that's good, because they'd kill me if I didn't."

"Who?"

"The wi- w- winning, uh, dragons. That's it. I'm not here to kidnap you at all. Kidnap is just a term..." the man cleared his throat, "Meaning...to take you to some dragons who...want dessert." He smiled hopefully.

Well, you had to give the guy credit, Shiara thought, he was a good listener...just a terribly bad liar. She crossed her arms. "Oh, do they? What does your paper say to do next?"

It says...sit and hurl...no, of course not, um...hit girl until red and talk. No...that's not it either. I'm sorry, you'll have to forgive me, his handwriting is awfully messy..."

"How about, Hit girl on head with rock?"

The man frowned, squinted at his paper, then smiled. "I say, that's it! How did you kno-"

Shiara hit him over the head with a frying pan, and he fell to the ground, unconscious.

After doing this, she realized that she probably should have asked more about him. Still, she had a feeling that he was up to something, and it definitely wasn't something good...

She'd have to wait until Kazul got back to question him.

xxxxx

When I awoke, the first thing I saw was a huge, golden eye. Not a very good sign.

"Uh...er...Hi?" I squeaked. The dragon grinned at me, which exposed all of its teeth.

I gulped.

"Um. Pretty day we're having, isn't it?"

"It's night outside."

"Ah." I glanced over at the entrance, where the door was slightly ajar. "So it is."

The dragon didn't mess around.

"What did you want with my princess?"

"Well, nothing really...she isn't truly a princess, is she? I mean, I heard she was a-"The dragon's eyes narrowed, and I bit off the rest of my sentence. "I mean, of course she's a

princess- and a very pretty one, I might add- and if you'd let me, I'll be going now-"

As I took a step towards the door, the girl called Shiara stepped in my way.

"Oh, going so soon? I thought that the...what was it?... 'winning dragons' would be angry with you if you didn't 'kidnap' me."

"Oh yes...them...well, if I can help it, I won't ever see the 'winning dragons' again, so-"

I took a step passed her, only to find the dragon was now blocking the entrance...or, in my case, the exit.

"And you forgot to introduce yourself to Kazul. That's terribly rude, considering that she's the king of the dragons."

I could feel my eyes widen. The king of the dragons? Oh, this definitely wasn't good. I knew those wizards weren't telling me something. But something wasn't quite right with that sentence...

"She?"

"Yes, she. King is just the name of the job. It doesn't matter whether the dragon is male or female."

"Oh. I'm...pleased to meet you, your majesty. I'm Samiel."

"Samiel as in, 'I look like a great 'sameal'?" The dragon grinned again.

"Ah, no...I think you may have interpreted that wrong-"I was sweating now. "Really, I mean no harm, and if you'd just let me leave-"

"Oh no, I couldn't possibly do that." Kazul said, "My princess read your little piece of paper out loud. It seems it's signed by 'the great wizard Therinive.'"

I had forgotten about that. Now, I knew I was in trouble. Wizards weren't allowed in the Mountains of Morning. "Er...well, that's over exaggerating a bit, I think. He's really not that great."

"But this means that you're a wizard as well, am I correct?"

I shifted uncomfortably. "Would it be better to say that I was a 'winning dragon'?"

Kazul actually smiled at that. Not a very comforting smile, (her teeth looked exceedingly sharp), but a smile nonetheless. "Perhaps. Where is your staff?"

"I...I...left it with the wizard council." This wasn't looking good, and was promising to get worse still. I thought half-heartedly of the pebbles I had in my pocket.

"I see. In any case, you're trapped, aren't you?"

"I suppose." I tried to look exceedingly small, which was quite easy, considering I was next to a dragon.

"Well, well...what will we do with you..."

Yes, it was definitely getting worse.