DESTROYED

Chapter 9

SUMMARY: Samuel finds out that he has been exposed to AIDS from one of his associates… Roger and Mark talk… Maureen and Mimi come into some extra money from Mimi's tips from the club, so they decide to go shopping for Angel.

Samuel sulked around just outside the back door to a club he and his 'friends' often frequented during the week – it was a club where drugs were a way of life, and guns were the only measure of security people really had, so it was not the safest place in the world. And of course, Samuel was trying to work his way up to weasel in to becoming 'friends' with those who already dominated the scene there. Not to say he didn't already have a strong hold, but it wasn't like he was a major drug lord or the leader of a large organized crime association or whatever. He had his own smaller group of thugs that really relied on muscles rather than brains; intimidating rather than extortion and exploitation, and of course, they fell deep into selling drugs and guns – not an uncommon practice in this part of New York City, unfortunately. It was 8:30 in the morning… a weird time for a gun deal, but that's the time the potential buyer had stipulated, which he claimed was non-negotiable.

He paced back and forth, rubbing his hands together in front of him nervously waiting for one of his associates, Randy, to get back from making a gun deal with a potential buyer. This time, the payment wasn't going to be money itself, but something of equal monetary value – drugs. Randy was one of the most experienced drug dealers in their gang, and they had been promised pure, uncut cocaine, so he was the one who was 'volunteered' to go make sure this stuff was legit. Samuel checked his watch and realized that Randy had been gone for almost three hours, which was nothing unusual… but if another hour passed without word of the deal then it would be safe to assume that trouble had come to pass.

"Sam, chill!" another one of his gang members, Julian, spoke up from where he was sitting, on a box against the wall, smoking a cigarette. "You know Randy, he's got it covered!"

"Yeah, and I also know he'll screw us over in a second if Jordan starts making nice with him," Sam spat back, referring to David Jordan, the man who Randy was currently with, making the deal go down. Samuel had met him only once through a contact not too far away, who had recently been knee-capped by Jordan for skipping out on a couple of grams of heroin he had paid out for.

He grimaced at the prospect of Jordan or Randy feeling ripped off… the last thing he wanted was for a gang war to start up, and he would be caught right in the middle of it. Literally. Both of those men were very territorial, and dealings between them were tenuous at best, so naturally it was uncharted territory for Sam who really had no idea just whom he was dealing with, and how far deep he was getting himself into this mess. But hey, he wanted to get into the big leagues… so he would also have to learn how to handle the big consequences of his actions.

Samuel was also distracted by what happened with Angel, and although he was disturbingly happy that Angel was suffering… he still wanted him dead. And he still wanted Collins more than anything, and just had to hold out hope that Angel, for his sake, kept his mouth shut… and there was definitely envy and jealously on Sam's part. When Collins had him shoved up against the wall, he was slightly turned on… but he had also seen past the anger and torment in his ex's eyes – he saw fear, regret, and anguish… love. Pure, unadulterated love. That was tearing Samuel up more than anything, and he had realized that there was no way he would ever have Collins in his arms again… and it sucked. It hurt. And now, he just wanted to kill Angel for real this time, but knew it would be really, uh, stupid to do so now… he had a history with Collins' and those friends of his. It would only be a matter of time before he was singled out as the one who attacked Angel… but he would deal with that at a later time. After, neither Collins nor his friends were exactly lethally dangerous – Randy and Jordan were. But he still couldn't get the thoughts of what he had done wrong, and the look of sheer anger in Collins' eyes, out of his mind – and he had to be careful before these distractions began to cloud his thoughts.

"You alright, man?" Julian queried, curious as to why his friend of nearly twenty years, was so unusually quiet and demure. Julian was a classic good kid turned bad – rich, good looks (blonde hair, blue eyes, great physique – can't go wrong!), and then of course, the bad influences kicked in (I.E. Samuel Michaels)… and these two friends were so loyal they'd fight to the deal side by side.

"Hmm?" Sam looked up, already feeling the affects of the X he had taken only minutes before. He needed the boost to keep him up during what may turn out to be a very volatile situation.

"What?"

"I said, 'are you alright'?" Julian repeated and stood up, dropping the cigarette to the ground and stepping on it, effectively putting it out. He then turned to his friend with a serious expression on his face. "Besides the X, you look like crap. What's goin' on with you, Sam?"

"Nothin'," he lied and felt his chest tighten. He craved the warmth of Collins' body; the strength of his arms around him… right now he really didn't give a damn about anything else. "It's cool."

"Don't you dare start getting cold feet—"

"I'm not!" Sam insisted, barely able to convince himself let alone Julian who knew him so well that he could see right through the façade. "I'm okay, dude, really!"

"Like fucking hell you are!" Julian growled, in a challenging tone. The two of them were usually always on the same page, and never really fought about anything – except when it came to anything that could jeopardize a drug deal or whatever. This one, in particular, had potentially huge ramifications should something go wrong, and it would be both their heads on the chopping blocks. But Julian wasn't in the mood to start a fight, and Samuel was in the midst of getting high… "Look, forget it. Just keep your cool, and whatever it is that's got you wrapped – forget about it."

"I can't," Sam muttered and leaned against the wall, folding his arms across his chest. Julian frowned.

"What?"

"Nothing…"

"No, tell me. If this is gonnascrew everything up, tell me now so I can at least be prepared to have the shit beaten out of me!"

Samuel glared at him, but didn't move… this thought processes were starting to be distorted, and the drug began to take a hold of him through his blood.

"Go to hell!"

"What the he--? You son of a bi—"

"Go fuck yourself!"

"Screw you!" Julian stormed up to him so they were standing face-to-face. The last thing either of them needed was for internal fighting between two of the small gang's leaders (there were only about fifteen or twenty members), and so another person stepped in to cool things down, and both men backed off. Sam grabbed his friend's arm and pulled him away further down the back road, away from the main group and Julian pulled his arm away.

"What the hell is up wit you, man?" he asked, sounding kind of hurt now. Recently, Sam had begun acting all weird and fucked up, more so than usual – and it wasn't the drugs, either. Samuel was getting depressed… he had been bragging about his violent accomplishment to a few of the other friends, who openly laughed along with him when he described in horrifically graphic detail of what he had done. But there wasn't that much satisfaction he could really derive from it, since he didn't actually finish the job, nor did he have Collins with him. But with Julian, he couldn't say it… he couldn't brag about it… because then his friend would know he was still obsessing over the college professor, and Julian never really liked him anyway. It was no secret that Sam was gay, or at least believed he was gay, but no one was surprisingly shocked or bothered by it… not if they wanted to live, anyway. But no one outside their gang knew, and that's how Samuel instructed it to stay, and no one dared to cross him… and Julian had no idea who he attacked; he knew someone had crossed paths with Sam, and had lost. But he had no idea who… yet.

Julian never really liked Collins for the sheer fact that he was a teacher, and he was too good of a person… he wasn't prepared to let his best friend fall for a guy who wouldn't be there for him, and who would probably denounce the actions of Sam and him. It wasn't like Collins was immune to the drugs, or was particularly bothered by those who used them… he just really wasn't into hurting people or getting into a position where he would see people hurting others. Collins is the kind of guy who is good, warm, and loyal… and it pissed Julian off to no end. But Sam's silence and reluctance to tell him gave Julian all the information he needed on what was going on… his eyes widened.

"Shit!" he shouted in frustration. "What is your obsession with this Collins guy? He's a fucking wimp!"

"He is not!" Sam protested. "He's the only guy who cared about me, and to see him run off with that drag queen whore!"

"What whore?"

"You don't know him…"

"Sammy," Julian patted his friend on the back. "You'd be surprised who I know. Tell me who it is… I'll finish the bastard off for ya."

Sam tapped the wall with his fingers and immersed himself in his thoughts, briefly. The idea of sending Julian to finish off his dirty work was very appealing, but he couldn't do that to a friend – yes, even he had a conscious, well… sort of. His loyalties were fiercely tired to him, the one person who hadn't turned his back on him. Sam had the temptation to go after Roger Davis and Mark Cohen as well, who were the ones who had actually convinced Collins that he was bad news, and that Sam had to go… and Collins believed them, understandably, because they're his best friends. But Samuel couldn't deny the hurt and anger he felt from the betrayal. He ran his fingers through his hair and smiled briefly as a cool breeze swept over his face.

"Forget it, Julian," he finally replied. "It don't matter. He's in the hospital, he knows I did it…"

"All the more reason to go and finish him before he talks."

"I said forget it! Dude, he's probably already told Collins and the rest…"

"Not if he knows what's good for him – and them."

"You shoulda seen it, man," Samuel confided, sadly. "Collins… he don't love me no more. His whole world revolves around Angel now… I'm so fucking outmatched."

Julian looked at him, from staring out across the street. "Who?"

"Angel. That fucking whore. He left me for that bitch…"

"Angel who?"

"How thehell should I know?" Samuel snapped, not really thinking about it. "Oh wait…" it dawned on him. "Schunard. Angel Schunard. Or something like that, I dunno…"

Julian frowned again, thinking deeply. He'd heard that name before, in the East Village… Angel was fairly well known to the locals around there, and Julian was no exception…

"Angel Schunard?" he whispered to himself, and then it came flooding back. He remembered meeting someone by that name about two years earlier… in a club… there were a lot of drag queens there, and a lot of people dealing drugs, having sex… he and Angel actually got along quite along, but mainly heard about him through other associates who had been with the street drumming drag queen on a purely physical level.

"Oh shit..." He looked up at his friend, alarmed. "Did you… you didn't, did you?"

"What?"

"Fuck him."

"He had it coming…"

It's not like Angel was famous or anything, but being the person he was, he had run into many people during his life. And in the East Village, news spread like wildfire…

"Shit! Samuel, do you have any idea what you've done?"

Samuel pulled a cigarette out of his pocket and lit it, unconcerned. "Why should I be? He had it coming… you should've seen him! Poor baby was crying out for Collins… what a weakling."

"Sam, you fucking moron!" Julian yelled at him. "Angel has AIDS!"

Samuel froze. "What did you just say?"

MEANWHILE, WITH ROGER AND MARK – THE LOFT – 9:06 AM

"Samuel Michaels?" Mark was shocked. "Collins' old boyfriend?"

"If you could've even called him that," Roger affirmed, slumping down on the sofa and picked up some sheet music he had laying at his feet. Mimi and Maureen had left earlier that morning, with Mimi shouting something about going out to make Angel feel better, so Roger and Mark assumed they were going to the hospital or whatever. Joanne was at work, again, doing some more paperwork that had 'mysteriously' turned up on her desk, thanks to one of her associates at legal aid. Benny had yet to see them again since leaving the hospital, and so they assumed that he was back to his pompous ways and enjoying life in the elite.

"Wow…" Mark muttered and sat on the sofa, too. "Does Collins know?"

"He came back just as I was leaving. I left them alone, so I assume Angel told him."

"Think that was a good idea?"

"What?"

"Leaving those two alone together?"

"Why? Think Collins will do something some thing stupid?"

"No," Mark responded, knowingly. "I mean, they probably jumped each other the second you closed the door behind you!"

"Mark," Roger rolled his eyes in disgust. The thought of those two going at it was disturbing enough, and he already heard more than enough from Angel.

"Dude, I… come on, that's just wrong. Besides, Angel's hurt. Even they wouldn't… you know… while he's still on life support."

"Never stopped them before," Mark muttered with sardonic amusement under his breath. Angel and Collins always kept their relationship private, but there was no secret to how, um… well… things were going for them in the bedroom – neither of them could really hide the afterglow of a good night of sex, especially Angel. "And yeah," he spoke up loud enough for Roger to hear. "I do think Collins' is gonna do something stupid…"

"Stupid enough to hurt someone?"

"No. Stupid enough to get him self hurt. Or Angel." Mark replied. "Samuel's dangerous."

"No kidding."

Don't doubt Mark's concerns, because he was really worried… but the thing was, with Angel being conflicted by AIDS, he couldn't help but ponder what this meant for Samuel. Couldn't happen to a nicer asshole, he thought. Both Roger and Mark, for once, were not without their respective guitar and camera… they were both too preoccupied… Collins was never so reckless as to choose someone dangerous to go out with, so why he was willing to risk everything by sleeping with him again, was beyond all conscious, logical reasoning. Mark turned to Roger.

"So what now?"

"I dunno, man… what can we do? Samuel's a goddamn drug dealer!"

"And our friends could be in danger!"

"I know!" Roger retorted, frustrated. "Mark, I know… it's not exactly something that you forget."

Mark stood up and walked over to the table, where his camera lay, and gently traced his finger over the lens cap, thinking of any sort of plan they could execute to not extract revenge on Sam, let's face it – that's not the type of people they are, and it's not like they could actually walk away from it unscathed… but then again, Angel was raped. He was brutalized. The trauma that the young man was going through was unconscionable, and they couldn't just let that go, either… for as long as Samuel was still free, he was able to terrorize them all, and everyone else who happened to wander into his territory.

Mark was the first one to catch on to the danger that was Samuel Michaels, and he confronted Collins about it, who laughed him off and said that Sam was actually harmless. Boy, did that comment ever come back to bite him in the ass now, and he was paying for it. And Angel was paying for it.

Neither of them doubted that Collins was putting himself through hell, and neither of them could honestly say he didn't deserve it. Collins was willing to sacrifice everything, including his lover's emotional and physical wellbeing, for a few nights of pleasuring himself with an ex boyfriend.

"We gotta do something…" he commented.

"Like what? Confront the son of a bitch?"

"Are you insane?"

"Yeah!"

"I mean… he'd probably kill us before we got in fifty feet of him," Mark continued, thoughtfully. Despite all that had changed over the past few months, his passion remained filming… maybe finally he could put his skills to good use. Maybe.

"Your point being?"

"I don't suppose Angel would be willing to call the cops, would he?"

"They've already been and gone, Mark," Roger explained. "They seriously did not give a shit about what happened to him. They gotta take care of the tax payers first."

"How's he doing… emotionally, and all that shit?"

Roger shrugged. "I guess… well, he was bitching about the fashion on T.V…. and then his sex life… then Mimi's… and then mine. I think he'll live. Emotionally, of course. Whatever…"

"And then?"

"And then he just sorta broke down again. What was I supposed to do?"

"Oh, I dunno, maybe, um comfort him?" Mark responded, half-heartedly.

"I did! And then Collins came back, so I left!"

"So that's it?"

"Pretty much."

Mark and Roger continued to banter back and forth, spinning ideas of what to do – truth me told, Samuel was all talk and would hardly kill a person himself. His hesitation to kill Angel only proved this theory further, however, one of his associates or gang members probably wouldn't be so reluctant, and from what they heard, Samuel was usually surrounded by his thugs anyway.

"Roger, we gotta do something."

"Like what, Mark? Tell me how and we'll do it! There's not much we can do! Angel's barely been awake for more than a day and we're already plotting how to get the asshole back who almost killed him?"

"Well we can't just sit here!"

Roger stood up and approached him. "Mark, you know who Sammy is as well as I do. Just chill for a few days; we'll figure out something…"

"And until then?"

He shrugged. "I don't know. I guess we just be there for Angel and let things happen…"

"I don't feel right about this, man…"

"You don't feel right about anything."

"That's not the point."

"Whatever."

"Whatever," Mark mocked and turned away from him. The loft was so empty with just the two of them there, despite the fact that they were the only ones who actually lived there. They were so used to everyone being here, just hanging out… and now, for everything to be so quite, it was kind of creepy, even for them. But, nevertheless, Roger was right. All they could really do was wait for Angel to get better and then see where things would take them from there… unless Samuel decided to make another unannounced reappearance.

"Mark?"

He didn't turn around – he hated for Roger to see how much all of this was paining him, because he was always the one who was the outsider, looking in, and making the observations on everyone else in his life. And now, he had been drawn in as much as everyone else… true, Mimi, Joanne, and even Angel didn't know of the drama that had taken place with Samuel several years ago, and it had been bad. And now, to see two of his best friends falling apart… it hurt him too. When Maureen left him, Mark learned nothing but to keep out of things and situations, and thus he wasn't affected as greatly (at least not as visibly) – and now, he couldn't distance himself and hide behind his work; hide behind the camera lens.

Roger stepped up next to him and studied him carefully…

"Mark, there's no shame in getting into it."

"No," Mark agreed, sadly shaking his head and looking at his feet. "But there is in not having done it sooner."

WITH MIMI AND MAUREEN

Wondering down the street and checking out the small boutiques and vendors, Mimi and Maureen were both cheerful and chirpy considering the circumstances. That's because Mimi had come to a 'brilliant' idea that would cheer Angel up for sure – SHOPPING! Given the two-hundred dollars she received in tips over the past few nights at the club, she wasn't blowing it all on drugs anymore, and Maureen implored her to join her in finding Angel some fabulous new outfits, wigs, make-up, or whatever they could find that would just scream of Angel's personality.

Maureen linked arms with her friend and began running down the street, effectively pulling Mimi along with her as they checked out everything they could see. Angel was a colorful, cheerful, lively, flamboyant drag queen who knew all there was to know about fashion and looking absolutely fabulous… was. Angel had changed dramatically over the past few months without Collins in his life, and now with the prospect of the two lovebirds hooking up again, maybe Angel could go back to normal as they wished he would.

"Wow…" Maureen muttered, browsing through a rack of colorful tops that she was sure Angel would absolutely drool over, and she picked up a bright red skirt that on other people would seem extremely tasteless. But Angel had the remarkable talent of making the tackiest, tasteless outfits into retail-worthy works of art that he sculpted against his own body. Maureen was envious at not having that same ability, but found the experience of shopping with Mimi all the more fun because they were now shopping with – for – a purpose.

"I swear, Angel would faint over all this…"

"I think he'd lose himself in it," Mimi giggled and took off a pink, slightly old looking short-sleeved shirt and held it against her own body and struck a pose.

"How do I look?"

Maureen looked up and carefully eyed her up and down, before rolling her eyes. "Put that down before I go blind,"

"Maureen!" Mimi picked up one of the shoes that was displayed on the table and threw it at Maureen, who simply ducked and cracked up laughing.

"Hey!" the vendor operator protested as the two girls began to use any of the clothing and objects around them and started to chase after them. Clothes and shoes went flying around and the girls started messing around as they usually did – Mimi was just coming down off a major high she had when she last shot up with the drugs, and so the world still looked kind of distorted to her. Roger had tried to get her off it, and she was, but it was taking time… she had shot up again when she learnt about what happened to Angel. Being as close to him as she was, she needed something to kill the anguish she was feeling, and believe me, the drugs still did it for her. Still, she and Maureen continued to mess around for as long as they remained uncaught.

Both Mimi and Maureen were laughing hysterically and grabbed hands to support each other as they ran down the street, much to the screaming protests of the man, who was left standing in a pile of clothes, shoes, and objects – a huge mess they had left.

"Did you see that dude's face?" Maureen had to grab her sides, which were hurting from laughing so much. They rounded a corner of a building and fell against the wall when they were sure they were completely safe, and they couldn't run anymore. Mimi wiped the tears from her eyes and turned to Maureen…

"We…" she tried to catch her breath. "Shouldn't… be…" she cracked up into a fierce fit of giggles again, which distorted the sentence she was trying to get out. "laugh… ing…! An… gel… needs us!" Mimi began to cry from all the laughing, and both forgot why they were laughing in the first place. Where they going overboard? Probably. But it was their way of dealing with the recent tragedy. Angel Schunard is there best friend, and they would be damned if they let him go by without a load of beautiful, gorgeous outfits and accessories.

"We're gonna find him the most awesome, fabulous outfit that he's seen, and all the other drag queens will be jealous!" Maureen declared, triumphantly, sending Mimi almost falling over from laughing. It was more about how she said it – so grand, and so like she was about to go on a quest… Maureen was so comical and lived life as if the world was a stage. Her stage. She made the world take notice of her whether it wanted to or not, and so it made perfect sense as to why she and Angel were so close, and so her sense of fashion quite often enough mirrored that of her friend's.

"No!" Mimi laughed and lightly gripped at Maureen's black halter top. "Fuck that, we'll make sure the whole world falls in love with him!"

"Really?"

"Hell yeah!"

"Mims, honey, you gotta get off that shit!"

"Why?"

"Because you make as much sense as… as… a cow!" she didn't know what she was saying, and cared even less as to if she was making sense or not. Maureen, being the performance artist that she is, never turned away any good or bad attention that she got, and Mimi was usually too strung out or too naive to really care either way. Both of them were extremely close with Angel, and so they were dealing with this tragedy the only way they knew how... shopping!

Mimi's eyes lit up. "Moooooooooo!" she teased, and both girls doubled over from their infectious, yet strange, sense of humor.

"MOOOOOOOOO!" Maureen joined in, just as she had done during the protest a year earlier.

"MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Both girls were mooing and laughing, causing several passer Byers to eye them suspiciously as they walked by; one woman even crossed the road to escape the inane babbling and cackling from them.

They both continued down the road in front of them, where more boutiques and stalls were set up with clothing and accessories. It took their minds off the seriousness of the situation, which Maureen knew more of, but not as much as Roger, Mark, and Collins… and Mimi really didn't know too much about it at all, and so had to be filled in on the details

"Mims!" Maureen called, after spotting something on a stand. "Over here!"

Mimi skipped over to her after checking out a few of the shoe stands not too far away, and wrapped her arms around her waist and grinned.

"What?"

"Check this out!"

Mimi's eyes widened at the large collection of beautiful, second hand, shoes and bags that to an ordinary person bore no interest in, inspired much excitement in the two bohemians who salivated over them like two lions over a zebra.

"Mimi?"

"Maureen?"

"Got the cash?"

"Got the time?"

"Angel will love it!"

"She better for what it's gonna cost me!"

"Like you got better things to spend that on!"

Mimi opened her mouth to respond, but shut it again after she realized that she was about to say that she did, when usually she was spending her money on either drugs or something of that nature… whatever she usually spent her money on, whatever little bit of cash she got, she never kept for very long. Instead she just poked her tongue out at Maureen, who just returned the gesture. They were gonna make Angel feel better, if it was the last thing they ever did!

AUTHOR'S NOTES: Okay, so Samuel has realized that he has been exposed to AIDS, and now he goes on a rampage, and he gets to the hospital with Julian, only to be met by Roger and Mark. Mimi and Maureen shower Angel with new clothes and the love that only true friends can bring.