Chapter 8 -- "Meanwhile on Galios IV"
Zartz was livid.
"What in blue blazes is Edmund doing back in Pine Valley? Did he even bother to notify us of his plans?"
Zift shrugged. "Actors!"
Zetz begged to differ. "Edmund is not an actor! Being an actor was only his cover story. Underneath it all he is as Galiosian as we are! Even if he doesn't look like us."
What the three Galiosians looked like was nothing like Edmund. At that moment, each looked like a bottle of olives. But that wouldn't last long. For an inhabitant of Galios IV, form was as temporary a state of being as the career of a Soap Star.
"I suppose he wants our help," Zift supposed.
"That's what he's saying in his brain wave transmission," Zartz affirmed. "An old girlfriend is in melt down mode and he wants us to help save her. Boring!"
"Boring!" Zift and Zetz agreed in unison, which they often did.
"I only hope he doesn't find the time machine and deactivate it," Zartz hoped. "I've been so looking forward to the collapse of matter into antimatter and the end of all material reality."
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"Edmund, do all ghosts get a far-away expression in their eyes from time to time?"
"From time to time," he said. "Especially when they're engaged in impossible acts of telekinesis."
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Edmund's autographed photograph, which had lain face-down on Brooke's desk, picked itself up. Brooke didn't notice. Her head was still in her arms, and she was still sobbing.
"Brooke, cut it out," Edmund's photograph said gently. "What good will crying do?"
Brooke slowly raised her head and stared at the photograph. "Say what?"
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"Zetz, I need more contrast. I need to see what Brooke is seeing!"
Using his telekinetic powers, which were not inconsiderable, Zetz adjusted the Remote
"And make it louder, for pity's sake! Why did you put on the mute?"
"That crazy woman has been screaming non-stop since the photograph started talking to her. You want me to get an earache?"
Zift laughed. "Olive jars get earaches?"
"You don't think so?"
Zetz turned up the volume, and the sound of Brooke's terrified screeches gave the olive jars aches in ears they did not have.
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"Brooke, you've got to calm down," Edmund's photograph was telling his hysterical best friend. "You are breaking eardrums where no eardrums exist."
Momentarily confused by the photograph's last statement, Brooke stopped screaming. Before the moment passed, Edmund's photograph made his appeal.
"Brooke you know that I loved you. You know we are Soul Mates."
"Liar!" Brooke yelled. It was a loud yell, but even a loud yell was a relief from the high pitch wailing that preceded it. "You never loved me! You loved Maria! You married Maria. Twice!"
"I left you everything," Edmund's photograph reminded her. "That counts for something."
Brooke disagreed in the strongest terms. "The hell it does! What does it count for? You remembered me in your lousy Will? What good does that do me? You're dead, Edmund! You're dead! What good does anything do me now?"
"When she puts it that way, it's hard to argue with her," Zift observed to the others, who were watching with him as the scene they helped Edmund create unfolded on their intergalactic interdimensional closed-circuit television.
"He should have changed agencies," Zetz opined. "In show business representation is everything."
"He wasn't killed off because of a bad agent," Zartz pointed out.
"Oh that's right," Zetz remembered. "We did that, didn't we? Do either of you remember why?"
Both of them did.
"It was because of the time machine," Zartz said. "But Edmund doesn't know that. That's why he's in Pine Valley and not here twisting off our bottle tops."
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"Opal, it is imperative that we meet tonight."
Opal made a face at her cell phone.
"Maria, the Glamourama closes at 6:00 pm on week-days and it's now 6:30 pm. So my hands are tied. I realize that the Estate Sale is tomorrow and you want to look your best for it, as if that would help anything at this stage, but there's nothing—"
"Opal, forget my hair! I need you to conduct a séance."
That took her by surprise.
"Oh, Maria, I can't. Not tonight!"
How could she could tell Maria that the reason for her unwillingness to throw a séance stemmed from the close encounter of the dead kind in which she was so deeply involved? She knew if Maria wanted a séance it was to contact Edmund. And contacting Edmund only required looking across Stuart and Marian's living room at the forlorn ghost who was sitting next to Lily, a faraway look in his ghostly eyes.
"Opal, it must be tonight! My family is falling apart! My kids hate me so much they practically throw up every time they look at me. Don't you see? I need Edmund to forgive me so they can forgive me, and the only way I can get to Edmund is through you!"
"Oh, deary dear," Opal murmured, taking Maria's plight to heart. "I wonder what Edmund would say if he knew the trouble you're in."
"I'd say good," Edmund said. "I'd say she deserves it!"
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"Have you ever noticed that Edmund does not exactly have a forgiving nature?" Zift asked his fellow olive bottles.
"That's pretty typical of Galiosians, I think," Zartz opined.
"Nonetheless, he should forgive Maria," Zetz said. "Zach was no threat to his marriage."
"How about the bag-boy at Wal-Mart, the shoe salesman at Lacey's, Sam's soccer coach, or Mrs. Tilwiliger?" Zift challenged.
"Keeping score, Zift?" Zartz asked archly.
Zift sighed. "What else do I have to do?"
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"Brooke, don't tear me up!"
Not following orders, Brooke tore Edmund's photograph in half and then in half again.
"Why shouldn't I tear you up, you heartless bastard? You've torn me up!" She sniffed. "And now I've gone crazy!"
"You're not crazy," the third piece of the four pieces of Edmund's picture corrected her. "You've been under an enormous strain, that's all."
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"Opal, you've got to help me, I'm going crazy!"
"Maria, I'd love to help. You know me. I'm always up for a séance, but in this case," she looked over at the glassy-eyed, unforgiving ghost of Edmund Grey. "I don't think the spirit is willing."
"Stuart, why are Opal and Lily staying here so long? It's rude to ask them to leave, but it's getting late and if they don't leave soon I won't be able to pose for your latest nude portrait of me using natural light! Or any light. Remember we couldn't afford to pay the light bill this month."
"Don't worry, Marian. I can always paint you by flashlight." He sighed. "I just wish I knew where Edmund's time machine was!"
"So do we!" said Zift, Zetz and Zartz.
Will the séance happen? If it does, will it bring Edmund closer to finding the time machine before it's too late? What dastardly plans do the Galioscians have for Pine Valley? Lots of chapters, lots of surprises still to come! Please read on! Your Review is welcome!