The Forthcoming of a Hero
An account of the Crusades
a.k.a. The Lion's Mutant Sisters Enjoyed Cheese as well
By hdjhfj dhdgh
My name is Ambroise Cajun Bahama, and I'd like to tell you a fascinating story about my adventures in the Crusades. I have had the pleasure of being acquainted with a wonderful fellow named Manfred, who unfortunately has been hospitalized recently, which brings tears to my greying eyes.
But this story is not about poor Manfred. It is about the amazingly good deeds done by The Carrots of Monty Jam. They have slayed numerous batteries and have fought the evils of the one hundred and one thieves. It is but a miracle I am here today, as I have eaten one too many corn dogs.
A long time ago I met with a dentist name Kikolo. He decided that the wisest quote in the world was none other than one that he made up. He was rather assured in his belief that his quote was the most clever and groundbreaking that had ever met the face of the world. I recommended taking this masterpiece to the Bullvarian Quote Festival , where renowned judges from across the globe take part in choosing the absolute coolest quote in the whole world. Kikolo loved the idea and was completely positive that he would win. I attended all the conventions with him, and it was there that I became acquainted with The Carrots of Monty Jam.
Then, finally, Masaccio came out of nowhere. He ran up to Kikolo and frowned in his face.
"Murderer…" Masaccio whispered in a bloodthirsty voice. "You took away my lifeless life when I was naught but 27 years old." The Carrots of Monty Jam brought Kikolo over for a sleepover. Kikolo happily accepted, and I contentedly followed, grinning as heartily as a round peach warmed on a windowsill.
"We need to discuss," the Carrots of Monty Jam said to Kikolo. I nodded solemnly.
"Ok, thanks," said Kikolo, and he went to bed.
In conclusion, I indeed enjoyed the Crusades and believe that it was the greatest war of all time.