Disclaimer: I don't own the rights to anything, except the typos, those are all mine, baby!

Sidenote: Short but to the point chapter, I hope everyone likes. As for the whole Rogue being pregnant thing, I totally apologize, the fiction archives have some stories in there where the characters get very creative in order to step around her mutation and I guess I just forgot that everyone hasn't read what I have. Sorry! If you want to check out the site, you can see what I mean. Even if you don't feel like reading any of the stories there, the site is fantastic and one of the best, so you can check it out. On with the story, please enjoy!

The months soon slipped away as the calendar flew through December, January, February, March and the April. May seemed to be the longest month for everyone. The students were to get summer break at the end, Rogue was due on the twenty-ninth and all of the staff would finally get some time off. However, in those past five months, things had gotten worse for me. I was barely working with Dr. Grey and the voices that had just started out in my head as one, quickly became three, then five, then seven. Soon there so many voices filling my head that I could hardly understand what people were saying unless I was paying very close attention to how their mouths moved. But it wasn't just that, other things were happening to me as well. When someone would talk, there had been times when I could literally see the words falling from their mouth. People's faces would distort, their eyes would go black and sink in. I would see people on the street and think they were following me. I had become obsessive over wearing my crosses. There could be no time where I wasn't wearing one, and had resorted to showering with my rosary on. When I wasn't in the shower, I would usually wear three, four or even five at a time. In short, my worst fear had come true; I was going crazy. Functioning on a daily basis became a task, communicating with people was hard for me to do, and although he never said anything about it or showed it, it was putting a strain on my relationship with Logan. He had started dating an almost normal person who had then turned into an obsessive, paranoid, lunatic. I was scared to say anything to anyone because I know how other people treat crazy people. It wasn't enough for me to be a mutant, but I had to be a crazy one as well.

I woke up with every voice in my head talking. Some were telling me to smother myself, fill up my bathtub and drown myself, or even to take a belt and hang myself in the closet. It was like that every morning and it took more self-control than I had ever had to use to not do what they told me. No matter how bad it got, I went on with my day.

I pulled myself from my bed and forced myself into a mildly warm shower. I pulled on a clean pair of scrubs, dried my hair and left for breakfast, but met Scott in the hallway on my way down.

"Good morning, Layla," he said.

"Morning," I said with a smile. Not quite sure that he had actually said what I thought I heard, I attempted to sound as though I were the one who had said it first.

"Listen, can I talk to you for a second?" he asked me as he stopped and turned to me in the hall.

I quickly pieced together what he had said and then nodded my head. "Yeah, sure,"

He placed his hands at his waist, twisted his mouth and then let out a sigh. "Jean's been having difficulties with her powers lately; she can hear people's thoughts involuntarily,"

"Is she okay?"

"Yeah, she's fine, the Professor's helping her to get control back over it, but the problem is that she's afraid she'll have to work alone until she's okay again. I'm really sorry, we both are, and she would have told you herself but one of the kids got sick this morning and she had to leave early. You'll still get paid and at the end of the summer you can go back to work again, but your thought track is a little fast and loud for her right now, I'm really sorry,"

"No, don't be," I said, grasping the fact that she could hear and had been listening to all of the voices in my head. I was sure that she was actually fine but didn't want to have a crazy person working with her. "I have an overly active thought process; I can only imagine what it's like for someone else to have to listen to. Tell her that I hope she gets it sorted out and if she ever needs any help, she can just yell at me,"

"I'm going to go down to the infirmary and check on her, so I'll tell her. I'll see you down at breakfast, okay?"

"Yeah, I'll see you down there," I said as I moved towards the staircase and he walked over to the elevator.

I slowly walked down the stairs and when I got to the bottom, I saw a very pregnant Rogue waddling past.

"How are feeling today?" I asked.

"Alright, she's kickin' me like crazy, though,"

"She's anxious to get out," I joked.

"We both are,"

"You don't have much longer to go," I said as Logan came up behind her.

"There she goes kickin' again," she said. "Here Logan, feel." She grabbed his hand and placed in on her stomach.

Rogue laughed at him as he looked up at her and smiled. "She's gonna' kick her way outta' there pretty soon," he said, then looked at me and winked.

"Don't get any ideas," I said to him with a laugh.

"Well, I gotta' go feed both of us," she told us and Logan gave her a kiss on top of the head.

"Alright," he said and then stayed where he was while she walked to the dining hall. We were both quiet for a moment as we looked at each other. "How are you doin' today?"

"I'm okay," I said slowly, nodding my head. It had been a year since my brother Ben had died, and in some ways, it seemed longer.

"I, uh, saw this the other day and got it for you," he said, reaching into and pulling something out from his pocket. I walked over to him and he placed a silver chain necklace with a small cross attached to it, into my hand.

I looked up at him and wasn't sure what to say. "Thank you," I said simply.

He pushed the hair out of my eyes, leaned down, and gave me a kiss. "Go out with me tonight," he said.

"Are you asking me or telling me to?"

"Both,"

"Well," I said, pressing my forehead to his. "Since you asked so nicely,"

"I don't want you sittin' around here feelin' bad tonight,"

"Thank you," I said, giving him a hug. He hugged me back. "Yeah, let's do something, what did you have in mind?"

"That's a surprise darlin', I can't tell you,"

"Hm, I guess I can accept that,"

"Good, let's go eat then,"

Logan rarely surprised me, he was usually straightforward with me about things, but so far that day, he had given me a new necklace and said that he was taking me out. I wasn't sure if he was actually wanting to make me feel better or if he was trying to keep our relationship working. I had been distant in those past few months and it didn't matter what that night was for, I wanted to make it up to him.

It felt odd not to work. Even when Dr. Grey would let me take time off, I would usually work for a couple of hours at least, but that day I just wandered around the school, peeking into everyone's classes to watch them teach for a while. Professor Xavier invited me in to listen to his lesson, but I passed, deciding that I wanted to call home and see how my momma and daddy were doing. The Professor said I could use his office phone so that I could have some privacy.

His office was decorated with various plaques and degrees as well as photos of his friends, staff, a few that I assumed to be his family, and one of him and Magneto when they were only around twenty years old. I never felt out of place there, even when I was younger and would have to go there because I was in trouble; he always made me feel comfortable there. Though, admittedly, it did still feel odd to be there as an adult. It was odd to have a relationship with the people who had, only years before, been just teachers and authority figures. Had I been merely two years younger, I would have been in school when Logan had first started teaching. Things work themselves out so brilliantly and amazingly, always surprising me.

I picked up the phone and dial the home phone number that, no matter how long it had been since my last call home, seemed etched onto my brain. There was a ring, two, three, four, five and then the answering machine picked up. It was odd to think that they wouldn't be home at that time in the afternoon and I knew that they had called I.D., but I decided to leave a message.

"Hey momma, daddy, I guess you're not home right now but I just wanted to call and see how you were. I uh, I'm sorry, I want ya'll to know that I really am. For everything," I said and then I heard the phone pick up and my heart began to pound. Then I heard a click. They had hung up on me.

I couldn't help it, I started crying and soon I was sobbing violently. I had only meant to stand up for myself, to show them that I was no longer a little kid that they could make fun of and tease. However, I had some how screwed that up. I didn't know if my family was mad, hurt, scared or whatever at me, they hadn't explained, they just were. Maybe I deserved it, maybe I over reacted, maybe I was far too sensitive and maybe, just maybe, it was all true.

I had just pulled on my T-shirt and was fastening the new necklace that Logan had bought me around my neck, when I heard Logan's distinctive knock on my door.

"Yeah, come in," I called out. I heard the door open and him walk into the room, then shut the door. "I've got to put on my shoes and then I'm done," I said, walking from my bathroom into my bedroom, where I saw Logan standing in his uniform.

"We're gonna' have to wait to go out," he said lamely, not looking right at me.

I cleared my throat. I was upset, I hated when he left for any mission and I had been excited about going out, but he was clearly angry enough for the both of us, so I tried not to show it to him. "I can wait, it's fine. How long are you supposed to be gone, though?"

"Scooter said a couple of days,"

"A real couple as in two or as in like four or five?"

"Hopefully two,"

"Okay," I said, nodding my head and biting my lip.

"I wouldn't have said yes to it but they said they needed me and Chuck doesn't want Drake goin' anywhere while Marie's waitin' on the baby,"

"No, I know, it's fine," I said. "Where are you going?"

"Newark,"

"That's not too bad," I said with a slight forced smile. "But listen; I know you don't like Scott, but he's the leader and even if you don't trust him, the Professor does and I know that you trust Xavier, so just listen to Scott when he tells you what to do. If you don't do your job then he can't do his and his job is to bring you back home to me, okay?"

"Yeah, okay," he said, placing a warm, leather gloved hand against my cheek.

"So don't do anything stupid," I said and he cocked an eyebrow at me. "Any more stupid that usual,"

"We'll try and get back as soon as we can,"

"Don't. Do what it takes to get it done right in however long it takes to do it. I don't want you to mess up by trying to speed through things just to get home sooner,"

He picked up the cross charm that hung from the necklace he had given me earlier that day, which sat atop of my pile of four others. "Why do you need some many of these?" he asked. He was to the point of realizing that I no longer enjoyed wearing them, but felt as though I needed them.

"Protection," I admitted.

He looked up at me from the cross he was holding. "From what?"

The voices in my head were all screaming for me not to tell him. They said that I was stupid, that he thought I was stupid, crazy and not worth his explanation for leaving. Some said for me to just leave, to ask him to leave and others wanted me to ask him to please use his claws and kill me. They wanted me to do a million things at once and wouldn't stop screaming at me. I never had moments of peace and I felt scared, alone and like breaking down.

I swallowed hard and cast my eyes down, staring at his boots and my bare feet. "Me," I whispered.

He didn't say anything and I thought for a moment that he was just going to walk away and leave me. "What's going that you're not tellin' me about?" I didn't answer him; I just played with the rosary around my wrist. He swore then grabbed me by the shoulders; forcing my body inline with his and tilting my face back up to meet his eyes. "Tell me what's wrong," he demanded.

"I can't," I said, straining back tears.

"Why?"

"Because,"

"Because why?"

"I just can't,"

"Fine,"

There was a knock on my door. "Logan, we've got to go," Scott called through it.

"Yeah, I'll be right down there," Logan called back.

"Okay, try to hurry up, though," Scott said, walking away.

"I'll see you when we get back," he said, turning from me and heading towards the door.

"Logan, please don't be mad at me," I cried, tears running down my cheeks.

He turned back to me once he reached the door. "I'm not mad at you darlin', it's not your fault you don't trust me," he spat.

"I do trust you, that's not what it's about,"

"Then what is it about? Why can't you talk to me about anything?"

"I do talk to you,"

"Not about what's botherin' you, you can't ever talk about that, can you?"

"You never tell me about your dreams, so don't act like I'm the only one,"

"You wanna' hear about me dreams, you wanna' know about how they cut me open, pumped me full of metal and turned me into an animal? You wanna' hear about all the people I killed to get outta that place, what do you want, I'll tell you but you gotta tell me what's goin' on," he said, his anger bubbling over into his voice, making it rise.

He was screaming at me, the voices were screaming at me and I felt as if I couldn't even think. "I can't,"

"All right," he said then turned, opened my door and left.

I felt to the floor right where I was standing and cried. Why was this happening to me? My life was falling down around me and I was watching it all from what felt like a third party view. I could see it happening, but I didn't know how to stop it. I didn't know how to deal with everything that was going on but I was too scared to ask for any help, because I was afraid that everyone would think that I was some crazed psychopath, but maybe I was. Maybe I had a real, genuine problem and needed help. I didn't know what to do about it or anything else. It had gotten me laid off from my job and I had hurt Logan because of it. Terrified of what was happening, I just laid in my floor, sobbing, for hours until my body was finally too weak to stay awake and I cried myself to sleep, wishing that I didn't have to ever wake up.

I woke up hours later, tired and cold on my floor. I didn't want to move, but my throat was sore and I needed a glass of water. I slowly pulled myself from my floor, went to my closet, then pulled out a sweatshirt and pulled it on. I didn't even want to look at myself in the mirror; I knew that I had to look rough. I had been wearing black eyeliner and mascara that I was sure was streaked across my face.

It was almost one in the morning, so I walked down the hall very quietly and took the elevator to the first floor. The school was quiet but everything seemed loud as the voices in my head were talking and yelling and screaming all at once. The kitchen was dark and empty and I was glad; the last thing I wanted was to see anyone. I flipped on the light, pulled a glass from one of the cabinets and filled it with water from the sink. My throat was aching from where I had been crying so hard and the cool water seemed to be enough to sooth it. However, I was shaking, though I didn't know why, perhaps again from crying so much, causing my hand to shake and drop the glass. It fell to the floor and I jumped back to avoid being cut by the falling shards of glass as it shattered on the ground. I wanted to scream, to cry again, but I felt too tired to do even that. I was tired, incredibly so. I felt as though everything had been building up to that day and then it was thrusted all on me at once.

"Just pick up one of the pieces of glass and drag it along your wrist. Everything will stop, it won't be loud and you can get some rest. No more disappointing anyone, no more bothering them, just peace and quiet," a voice said loudly, amidst the sea of others inside my head. I looked down at the glass and decided he was right.

I picked up one of the larger pieces and turned on the water in the sink. I stuck my wrist underneath it and even with all of the chaos going on in my life and inside my head, I felt oddly calm about it all. I took a slow breath, then took the glass and pressed it into my skin, feeling the immediate sting of pain as it cut through my flesh. I pressed it down harder, forcing it deeper and then I pulled it across the inside of my wrist, slicing through the sensitive skin. Blood was pouring from it, which turned the water that was running over it to a diluted red color.

There was a mixture of feelings that washed over me; happiness, sadness, satisfaction, regret, pain, there was pain, fear. I heard the voices laugh at me, tell me that I was stupid and deserved to die. I squeezed my hands tight at the itchy, stinging pain that I felt and then when I felt a new pain in my right hand, I realized that I had been holding the piece of glass in it still, and had cut my palm as well. I dropped it and fell back against the counter, sliding down until I was sitting in the floor. Have you ever been sick and you could feel the color drain from your face? I sort of felt like that right then, only much worse. Every single one of the voices was screaming and I couldn't understand any of them. I put my hands up and covered my ears, trying to block them out, but it didn't work. I began to cry, knowing that soon their ear deafening yells would stop as I slipped into a state of unconsciousness to die.

I watched the lights in the kitchen fade, the loss of blood making me dizzy. I looked down at the blood that was dripping from my palm onto my rosary. As I say there feeling that soon I would finally have some peace, I hoped that they would burry me with my crosses.