====MORTAL KOMBAT NAZZA-SPONSORED TOURNAMENT 2====

/Tournament Record ReFlushed/

[Begin Tournament Entry #07]

/Round 1 and a Half Party/

Shang Tsung walked out of the stadium, blood pouring out of his face. Why did I just tell you that? Coz I felt like it.

Meanwhile, Scorpion's phone rang. 'Hello?'

'Hey-oo, 'sup.'

'Doo, doodoodoo. DOO-DOO! Nuttin' Sub, just watching the game, havin' a brew, 'sup witchu?'

'Nuttin'. Watchin' TV havin' a brew.'

'True, true.'

'WASSSUUUUUH!' shouted Shao Kahn. 'WASSSUUUUUH!'

'Uh, sorry guys,' said Goro. 'Kahn's been on a drinking binge. The problem is, he's been drinking nail polish.'

'I have an announcement I think you'll all like,' said Kahn. 'All chicks have to go skinny-dippin'!'

Sonya was disgusted. So disgusted, that she took her top off and ran through the streets mindlessly.

'I think she's been at the nail polish,' said Reptile as she ran past.

'That wasn't the announcement,' said Goro. 'That means all you guys have to come back.'

'DAMN!' shouted Stryker.

'The announcement is this: you have all made it halfway through Round One! We have seven more matches to go, then...a surprise...but for now, we'll be having a party in the Party Stadium!'

==SHANG TSUNG==

'Hey, where's the chicks skinny-dipping?' Tsung stood there, scratching his head in a confused manner.

==THAT NIGHT==

Music blasted out of the Stadium. 'Good thing this resort doesn't have neighbours!' said Motaro the Centaur.

==NEXT DOOR TO THE RESORT==

'Turn that racket down! Turn it down now, or I'm calling the police!'

'Calm down, grandad. Despite what you think, it's actually *good* music.'

Rayden looked around the Stadium. 'Where's Shang Tsung?'

'Where's Shang Tsung?' said Sonya.

'Where's Shang Tsung?' said Sindel.

'Where's Shang Tsung?' said Sheeva.

'Where-is-Shang-Tsung?' said Smoke.

'Where's the cake?' said Scorpion.

'Where's that grenade I had?' said Stryker.

Suddenly there was a BOOM! and smoke rose into the atmosphere. That smoke went out to conspire against John F. Kennedy and shoot his ghost.

'I hope it got Sheeva!' Stryker said excitedly.

'I'm right behind you, dumbass.'

==STRYKER==

Stryker spun around. 'At least I'm not an ugly freak!'

'How dare you call me freak!' said Sheeva. She got so angry that she began an interpretive dance.

Suddenly Shang Tsung appeared out of nowhere in a flash of light. 'KAHN! Why didn't you tell me that skinny-dipping thing was a joke?!'

'It wasn't a joke,' said Kahn defensively.

'I nearly mistook a squid for Sheeva! Luckily I realised before I took my clothes off -'

'AWW THAT'S GROSS!' said Stryker. 'You really are a freak.'

Tsung stuck his fist out to try and grab Stryker, Jax-Style. He tried fifteen times, but each time he missed.

'I'll let you off just this once, but if you annoy me again, you're in for it!'

Stryker was just about to say something when Shao Kahn stepped up onto a stage in the middle of the Party Stadium. 'May I have your attention?'

Everyone continued talking.

'May I have your attention please?'

They ignored him.

'Will the real Slim Shady please stand up! I repeat, will the real Slim Shady please stand up!'

Subzero stood up.

'We're gonna have a problem here.'

Goro stepped up to the mic. 'Hello everyone! As you all know, this party isn't just about food and fun, but other stuff! That's right, there's a deeper meaning to this party, just like the chicken joke.'

'We are going to hand out awards now,' said Shao Kahn. 'Motaro and Goro will present them!'

'Hello Springfield!' said Motaro. 'I mean, audience! And the winner of the Worst Beaten-Up Fighter goes to...'

He opened the letter.

'Shang Tsung!'

Tsung walked up on stage with a sour look on his face, snatched the note from Goro and walked off death-staring everyone.

'And this next award,' said Goro, 'is for the Best Robot.'

'I bet I'll win!' shouted Subzero.

'And the winner,' said Motaro, as he opened the letter, 'is Smoke!'

Smoke walked up on stage. 'First-off,-I'd-just-like-to-say-thanks-to - hey!-stop-pushing-me-off-the-stage!'

'Please, no acceptance speeches,' said Goro. 'Or in Tsung's case, he's a dickhead.'

'Hey! That's insulting and makes no sense!'

'This next award is for Best Outfit,' said Motaro. 'The nominees are:

Sheeva, for her rather, *shudder* revealing outfit;

Rayden, for his traditional Chinese big-hatted man;

Smoke, for his stylish robot design (in my opinion though he *needs* a new outfit);

Subzero, Scorpion and Reptile for all wearing the same brand of clothing. And the same outfit. And the same accessories.

'And the winner is...Kabal!'

'Hang on, that's not right,' said Goro.

'Sorry, I was just thinking about getting cable,' said Motaro. 'And the winner is...Rayden!'

Rayden went up on stage, took his award, bowed, demonstrated some of his Chinese kung-fu, then sat back down.

'This next award is for Best Female Fighter,' said Goro. 'And the nominees are...well, you know who they are.

'I don't!' said Johnny Cage.

'And the winner is...' Motaro opened the envelope. 'Smoke! Wait, wrong envelope.

The winner is...Rayden! Wait, that's not right either. The winner is...'

The audience gasped.

'Kano?'

'Kano isn't a woman!' said Goro. 'As far as I know...'

'As far as YOU know,' said Kano.

'The *real* winner is...Sindel!'

Sindel walked onstage like a person on the catwalk, took her award, bowed and flew back down to her seat.

Sonya shook her head. 'Showoff.'

'Huh, how'd this envelope get here?' Goro wondered.

'Shao Kahn said to do them all, so we're doing them all,' said Motaro.

'Okay. This last award is for Most Gross Fighter.'

'And the winner is...Sheeva!'

Stryker burst out laughing. He was laughing so hard that he didn't feel Sheeva punch him. He also didn't feel the grenade she placed in his arms.

'You're all laughing now,' said Sheeva, 'but later on...'

'Holy shit!' said Stryker as he realised. 'Damn you, Sheeva! You wanna kill us all!' He threw the grenade, but it didn't make it out of the stadium.

'What do you mean?'

'That was one of my high-impact grenades you idiot!'

'Uh-oh,' said Goro. He watched as everyone ducked, waiting for the grenade to go off. He turned to Shao Kahn, but Kahn insisted they keep going.

'Uh, um - the skilled fighters are: Sonya, Sindel, Reptile, Scorpion, Subzero, Kabal and Rayden.'

'And the low fighters are: Nightwolf, Kano, Sheeva, Stryker, Johnny Cage, Smoke and Shang Tsung. Have a nice day!'

Motaro galloped out of the stadium, followed by Goro.

'Here it comes!' shouted Stryker.

KABOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

=======================================================================

As usual, Sheeva causes more trouble. Will she ever learn to just accept being a freak?

Next episode: Did they survive? You figure it out yourself.