CHAPTER 5
Hoshi had blocked out the conversation of the others in sickbay as she immersed herself in the inscriptions. Nonetheless, the beep from the comm panel intruded upon her concentration.
"Senior officers to the bridge!" Travis' voice rang out. "We are receiving a distress call. Repeat. Senior officers to the bridge."
Hoshi locked gazes with Jon. The crew didn't know about them yet and now they had an emergency to deal with. She saw the same uncertainty she felt in the brown eyes staring back at her. The clenching of her stomach, despite the different body, felt the same as it always did.
Jon nodded. "Hoshi, T'Pol, Malcolm -- you're with me. Trip, you better get down to Engineering."
Phlox looked up in surprise from the microscope where he had been studying Jon and Hoshi's blood samples. "But, Captain--"
"Priorities, Doctor. We've got to take care of the distress call first," Jon said, already striding toward the sickbay doors.
This is ridiculous, Hoshi thought, watching Jon in her body lead the group out of sickbay. They all fell in line behind the diminutive form except for Trip, who turned in the opposite direction to go to Engineering.
They piled into the turbolift and Jon punched the button for the bridge.
"Ah, sir," she started, then stopped under the combined curious stares of Malcolm and T'Pol.
Jon looked up at her. "Yes, Hoshi?"
"Are we going to tell the rest of the bridge crew about us?"
"Let's deal with the distress call first," he said. "Just do what you normally would do, and I'll do what I normally do. T'Pol and Malcolm will back us up."
She looked down at him dubiously. "If you say so, sir. But don't you think--"
The words died in her throat as the turbolift doors slid open.
Travis had changed course as soon as the distress call had come in and had made a general comm announcement calling the senior officers to the bridge, but he was worried. No one had acknowledged the call.
He was about to issue the call again when the turbolift doors slid open, and he looked over in relief to see Hoshi bound out, followed by T'Pol, Malcolm, and, last of all, the captain.
His relief turned to puzzlement as Hoshi stepped down to the lower command level and the captain went over to Hoshi's communications console. Travis watched dumbfounded as the captain sat down and put in the earpiece Hoshi used.
"What's our status, Travis?" came Hoshi's voice from behind him.
Travis turned around in his chair to face her. "Excuse me?"
"Answer her, unless you want to be busted back to crewman!" came the captain's voice from the upper level.
Travis saw Hoshi grin at the captain. But then she turned a stern glare on him and he managed to stammer, "We're on a heading for the source of the distress call. Warp 5."
T'Pol at least had taken her usual place, looking into her scanner, Travis noted. "The distress call is coming from a Tellarite ship," she said. "At our current speed, it will take us approximately 26 hours to reach them."
Travis, not daring to take his eyes from his console after the captain's reprimand, heard the click of the comm being opened on the captain's chair and then Hoshi's voice.
"Trip, can we keep up Warp 5 for a day?"
"Sure thing, Ho--...ah, Cap'n," came the reply over the speaker on the arm of the captain's chair. "The engine's purrin' like a kitten even at this speed."
Travis almost gasped out loud. Trip was calling Hoshi "Captain"? What was going on?
From the corner of his eye, Travis watched Hoshi walk over to the captain at the communications console.
"Is there any more information with the distress call?" she asked.
He saw the captain shake his head, one hand to the earpiece. "They're having some kind of engine problem. Nothing more than that."
Their voices dropped and Travis couldn't hear what they were saying. He snuck a glance at T'Pol who didn't seem the least perturbed that the captain and Hoshi were doing each other's jobs. The Vulcan had her face glued to the scanner.
Risking a glance over his shoulder, Travis found Malcolm staring at him. The stern expression on the tactical officer's face made him turn back around quickly and pay attention to his helm console.
"They're answering our hail," the captain said, one hand still holding the earpiece in place. "Their engine is offline and they're operating life support from batteries."
"Ask if they can hold out until we get there," Hoshi instructed.
Travis eyed the insignia on their uniforms as the captain complied with Hoshi's order. Hoshi was still an ensign and the captain was still a captain, at least if you went by their pips. Was he hallucinating this whole experience?
"They say they can," Jon relayed as the information came in, adding, "No one else has responded to their distress call."
Travis watched with wide eyes as Hoshi gestured for the captain to join her as she headed for the turbolift. She stopped and turned to survey the bridge crew, a slight grin on her face.
"Maintain course and speed, Travis," she said. "If there are any changes, notify me. I'll be in the captain's mess."
As the captain passed her and entered the turbolift, she added a parting shot. "And to answer the question everyone is wondering -- I am the captain. Hoshi and I have just switched bodies, that's all."
Travis' mouth fell open as the door slid closed on the turbolift.
"Nice tactical retreat, sir," Hoshi said as the turbolift began to move.
Jon leaned against the wall of the turbolift, running a hand over his face and then behind his neck. "Do you always get this tense in an alert situation? Your muscles have all tightened up."
"Sometimes." Hoshi snorted and then scratched at the stubble on her chin. "You really could use a shave, you know?"
Jon shrugged, trying to work the kinks out of the small set of shoulders. "That's one of the reasons I thought we should go somewhere private. We have some things to discuss and we might as well have breakfast at the same time. Phlox will let us know if he has come up with anything concerning our switch."
"I am getting hungry," Hoshi admitted, a deep growl from her stomach punctuating her comment.
The turbolift door opened on E deck and the pair stepped out. Jon, in Hoshi's body, led the way down the corridor to the mess hall. Opting not to go through the serving line which was just being set up for the morning meal, he headed directly for his private dining area.
Jon took his usual seat at the head of the table and Hoshi sat down in a chair next to him. They hadn't counted on the reaction of Crewman Cunningham, the captain's steward, however, to seeing the captain's place usurped by an ensign.
A slight, disapproving frown crossed Cunningham's face as he took in the seating arrangement. Jon gave Hoshi a wink before addressing the waiting steward.
"First, we need a big pot of coffee," he said. "And I'd like scrambled eggs, bacon and hash browns. And if Chef has some of those Danishes left, a couple of those would be good."
Cunningham sniffed -- not quite disdainfully -- and turned toward the man seated at the table. "And you, sir?"
"Just some toast and fresh fruit," Hoshi said.
Cunningham raised his eyebrows. "Are you sure, sir? You generally eat a big breakfast."
Hoshi glared at him through narrowed eyes.
"Yes, sir," Cunningham said hastily. "Toast and fruit."
As the steward began to walk away, she called out, "And a big mug of sweet tea!"
Cunningham hesitated in mid-step, mumbled what sounded like, "Aye, sir," and continued out of the private mess.
"That was fun in an odd, twisted sort of way," Hoshi said with a grin after the door slid shut behind the confused crewman. "I should apologize later."
Jon rolled his eyes. "You are incorrigible. I still can't believe you reprimanded Travis on the bridge and we let him think it was me. We have to get you out of my body as soon as possible. Otherwise, who knows what you'll do to an unsuspecting crew."
Hoshi looked at him in her body. He was leaning forward, elbows on the table, hands steepled. It was so unlike how she would normally sit. She herself was sitting bolt upright, hands clasped on her lap.
"No offense, sir, but I think it's easier for me to act like you in this body than it is for you to act like me in mine."
"Well, we're not going to act like each other any more," Jon said seriously. "We've got a ship to run, and we're enroute to a ship in distress. After we get done here and get back to sickbay, we'll make a shipwide announcement about our situation. Then you get started on the translations again."
Reaching up to touch the pips on the collar of Hoshi's uniform he was wearing, he added, "This is a good place to start. Let's get the right rank markings on us."
Hoshi took two pips off the collar of the uniform she was wearing and handed them to Jon. She had to admit it was strange to see four pips on the collar of the uniform that she should be wearing. Of course, it was even weirder to see herself sitting there.
"They look good on me," she said as she watched Jon finish attaching the last pip.
"Who knows?" Jon said with a grin. "Maybe when this is all over, you'll think about getting on the command track."
"If this is what I have to deal with, no thank you."
Cunningham re-entered the mess with a tray and placed the selections in front of them without saying a word. He was pouring a cup of coffee for the person he thought was Hoshi when he noticed the four pips on the collar. His eyes quickly darted toward the person he thought was the captain and widened at the two pips he saw on that uniform.
"Sir?" he asked hesitantly.
"Yes?" responded both people at the table.
Jon shot Hoshi a glare. "Stop that," he said in Hoshi's voice.
"Sorry," she rumbled unrepentantly. "Couldn't help it."
Jon harrumphed, his decidedly feminine rendition of it causing him to blink. "There's a good explanation for this, Cunningham," he said.
"If you say so. It's not up to me to judge any little games the captain might like to play with a member of the crew."
Jon opened his mouth to speak but Cunningham turned quickly on his heel and beat a hasty retreat.
"Oh, hell. He'll just have to wait until the rest of the crew is informed," Jon said.
"Mmmm," Hoshi mumbled around a mouthful of food. She had devoured the toast and was starting in on an apple, pausing for sips of tea, when she realized Jon was giving her his full attention. She swallowed and asked, "What?"
"You're going to have to eat more than that," he said. "Otherwise I -- I mean you -- will be starving before it's halfway to lunch."
"I am pretty hungry," she admitted. She pointed to the overflowing plate in front of the captain. "And if you eat all that, I'll kill you."
"Why?"
"Don't think just because you're in my body I'm going to let you put on a bunch of excess weight. If you eat three meals a day like that, I'll gain an extra five pounds by the end of the week."
Jon poked at the eggs on his plate with his fork. "You've got a point. To tell the truth, I don't think I can eat all this. I just ordered what I normally would."
"In that case, slide your plate over here. I'll take care of it."
Jon wound up eating a slice of canteloupe that was included in Hoshi's fruit as well as a strip of bacon he filched back from his plate. He did stick with the coffee, however; he wasn't about to give up his usual morning brew.
Their hunger appeased, talk turned to more practical matters.
"I suggest we keep our own cabins," he said. "But we're going to have to borrow each other's uniforms and other clothing."
"Only if I'm there to pick out what you're borrowing," Hoshi said, a slight blush staining her now masculine cheeks as she thought about the captain wearing some of her underthings.
"Same here," Jon agreed, a blush tinging his face as well.
After Cunningham had cleared away the dishes, leaving them alone with the pot of coffee and two cups, Jon broached a new subject. "Um. I'm not quite sure how to bring this up," he began, fidgeting in his seat.
"You have to use the bathroom, don't you?" Hoshi said. At Jon's startled look, she said, "If I'd drunk as much coffee as you did, I would."
"Well, yeah. You already took care of that once in sickbay but I haven't..."
Hoshi grinned. "Just remember to sit down when you do it."
Jon didn't bother to say anything more. He stood up and went into the bathroom adjacent to the private dining room. He reappeared some minutes later with a bemused look on his face.
"You OK?" Hoshi asked.
"Yeah. Let's just say I'll remember to put the seat down after I'm done from now on. And I'm definitely checking to make sure it's that way before I sit down."
Hoshi's deep laughter could be heard all the way out in the mess hall.