Disclaimer: I do not own anything owned by Eoin Colfer or anything to do with the Artemis Fowl books or anything like that. I only own what I own/made up/created/ thought of. Got it?

A/N: This chapter is a page longer than the others, because otherwise nothing would have happened and it is mean to do that two weeks in a row. Not much happens in this chapter either, but it will happen, I swear.

Chapter Nine

'Hey Commander, how are you?'

'Good Short, you?'

'I'm fine Commander.'

'Good.'

There was silence for a few minutes as Holly stood awkwardly by the door and Julius continued placing his possessions in a bag, trying to do so quickly without looking like he was rushing was proving extremely difficult for him.

'How are you getting home?'

'Driving.'

'But Foaly, trying to be helpful of course, had your vehicle towed back to you apartment.'

'D'arvit. I suppose I'll walk then.'

'Do you want me to give you a ride?'

'I don't expect you to do that Short,' said Julius, while inside him his heart was fluttering at the chance to possibly spend more time with Holly.

'It's no trouble, honest. Besides, we can't have you walking home from hospital now can we?' She grinned as she made that statement.

'Fine, as long as you don't mind.'

'No problem. You ready to go?'

'Yes,' replied the Commander happily, zipping his bag.

'Why are you so happy all of a sudden?' asked Holly curiously.

'Just happy to be getting out of here.'

Holly accepted this answer without question, but for some reason Commander Root had a sneaking suspicion that she didn't quite believe him.

As they headed out to Holly's four wheel drive Holly realised she wasn't quite sure why she had gone to see Julius and offered to take him home, but somehow she knew that it was the right thing for her to do.

'You look way better, younger I mean, now that the ulcer's gone,' said Holly as they pulled out onto the magmastrip. Holly immediately felt like an idiot. She was sure that Julius would be offended by this, she began to go red.

Julius wasn't sure what to say. Was Holly complementing him or something? How could that be? He settled on a comment that he thought might be slightly jovial.

'Oh, so I looked bad before?'

Holly turned bright red and muttered, 'That's not what I meant.'

Julius was genuinely worried; he never meant to embarrass Holly. He decided that now might be the time to say thank you to her for the complement.

'I didn't mean that Holly, thanks.'

Relief flooded Holly's face.

'This shouldn't be taking so long,' she muttered.

'What?'

'We should be there by now. I wonder why the traffic is so bad.'

The answer came soon enough. As they rounded a bend in the magmastrip they saw a pileup on the magmastrip. Somehow 15 drivers had managed to crash into each other simultaneously while trying to avoid a car that had managed to catch fire.

'We could be here for awhile, sorry Holly.'

'It's fine Commander.'

'Do you want to sit here in complete silence?'

'If you want to sir,' replied Holly, not sure if it was a trick question or not.

'It's not a trick question if that's what you are thinking.'

'Oh.'

'So do you want to tell me what I missed this week?' Commander Root couldn't believe that he was trying to make small talk with Holly and would probably be stuck in a confined space with her for an hour.

'Nothing much Commander,' Holly grinned, 'nothing ever happens when you aren't there sir. I think some people even miss you.'

'Please don't call me 'Commander' or 'sir' for however long we are stuck here Holly, it gets depressing.'

Holly was totally confuzzled, 'I don't understand sir, do you want me to call you Root?' Never in anyone's memory had Commander Root given anyone permission to call him by his first name. The exception was Briar Cudgeon, and we all know what a traitor he was.

'No Holly, call me Julius, no one has for so long. I rather miss my name.'

'O.K…' replied Holly cautiously, she didn't know where this was leading, but at least Julius didn't seem too angry with her.

'So, ummm, Julius, if you don't mind my asking, how old are you actually? No offence, but you looked about one thousand five hundred a few days ago.'

'Amazing how the fake age goes away when the ulcer is removed isn't it? Believe it or not I'm four hundred and eighty five.'

Holly was amazed. She was eighty four. Julius was only four hundred and one years older than her. Whoever knew that would be possible?

'Wow, everyone would be so surprised to find that out. You must be the youngest full Commander ever in the history of the LEP.'

'You can't tell everyone Holly, I'd loose what little reputation I have left.'

'I wouldn't dream of telling everyone, let them think you're a thousand five hundred.' Holly grinned. She seemed to be doing that a lot lately.

'Just because I looked a thousand five hundred didn't mean I was. You should know not to judge a book by its cover.'

'Ah, the old mud man cliché, nice touch Julius.'

Julius just grinned. For once in his life he wasn't having an argument with Holly.

The traffic chose that exact moment to start moving again, and within three minutes they were at Julius' apartment block. Holly insisted on hefting his bag up the nine floors to his apartment, which wasn't that much bigger than hers. Maybe the pay for being a Commander wasn't that much better than the pay for being a Captain. Not that she was about to ask.

'You want to come in for a coffee?'

'Yea, O.K.'

'Lousy LEP pay,' muttered Julius as he punched the key code into the electronic number pad and opened the door. Both he and Holly couldn't help it. They burst into fits of giggles; Julius had just voiced what had been in the mind of all LEP employees for centuries. It was probably the first time that a Commander had voiced the opinion. Not that all the Corporal's (and the likes of Grub Kelp, of course) didn't voice it every day.

'Something we agree on,' giggled Holly.

'This is a moment for the record books.'

The both subsided into giggles, not that they had really stopped from before. It was most unlike LEP officers to do this.

It took them about five minutes, but they managed to regain their composure. Holly wasn't really surprised at how Julius' apartment looked, so it was a little odd, did that really matter? It was furnished in an old mud-man style décor, lots of wood and the such, there were fairy electronics, of course, it actually looked really good. But no time to worry about that now. There was the slight problem of the giggling fit to attend to. Holly turned to Julius.

'I won't tell if you don't Julius.'

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A/N: So, a page longer than usual, but don't get used to it. I will be updating again next week, and probably writing a new story in the holidays (hehe next week is the last week of term) anyway, please review. I hope you enjoyed this chapter. Oh, and I just have to point out that as of four review from now I will have more reviews on this story than on my other story, and that has 13 chapters. So thank you to everyone who has ever reviewed.

Review Replies:

sergeantstan: Thanks, and thanks again. Encore, hehe, that makes me laugh, last year we did an encore from the end of a fifteen minute Romeo and Juliet and it was one minute long. It was amazing to see something that took about three weeks for our class to read condensed into sixty seconds. Now I can't help but laugh every time I hear that word. Anyway, when are you going to update your story? I'm suffering from deprivation here.

Stiggy - Yes, it does. So does Holly/Trouble in my opinion, but that wasn't the point of this story, so it's Holly/Root and I'm proud of it. Well that is just devastating, it's all the sticky stuffs fault. I'll send you a review saying I want my name on your petition just as soon as you update. Wow, a turnip of my very own, I feel honoured.

Mage Kitty - Thanks. I always reply to reviews, if people take the time to review. Thanks for reviewing.

potter-Dork - No, not Holly/Trouble, that would be very disturbing considering the circumstances. Thanks. They interact in this chapter, wait, this is at the end now, well that was a pointless comment.

lalalalala - hmmm, well the update will be here when you check back once a week I suppose. Clever method though.

hidden and forgotten - whoops, I'm sorry. I hope this does.

Tryptophan - True. I'm already in negotiations to purchase a pitch-fork, considering Colfer is currently here in NZ… yes, I heard about that. And there are two more Artemis Fowl books. I'm getting excited. Repetitive, got it. Hmmm, I see what you mean. I wasn't really going to describe where he lived, but I added a little description near the end just for you. Not very creative, but the best I could come up with. Wh is pronounced as F, aka is pronounced is ucka, tane is pronounced taanaye. If I was to type the actual pronunciation I might have to rate the story for swearing. I find it funny whenever you say that to someone from overseas and they say 'Wow, you can swear in NZ'. Hmmm, A moa is extinct but was basically like a giant ostrich, a kiwi is the little brown thingy with a long beak that can't fly (there are three varieties), and a takahe is a blue and green bird I think, and they were thought to be extinct. All indigenous to New Zealand, of course. Enough rambling on about pointless stuff from me though. Yes I did write this whole thing. Thanks for reviewing.