Disclaimer: I do not own anything owned by Eoin Colfer or anything to do with the Artemis Fowl books or anything like that. I only own what I own/made up/created/ thought of. Got it?

WARNING: any part of this story from this point forwards (and probably some before it) may contain OOCness. I'm sorry, but I couldn't make it work any other way.

A/N: I take back what I said about last week being bad. I'm not even going to comment on this week, just click the button before I fall asleep on the keyboard.

Chapter Fifteen

'Cool,' she said then leaned over and kissed Julius, more passionately this time, 'thanks so much, sir.' She really couldn't believe she what she was doing, or that she was calling a criminal 'sir', but she'd already made a fool or herself, might as well do a good job of it.

'What time do you want to see us tomorrow?' asked Julius.

'Ten P.M. Come in whatever you want to wear to get married.'

'Thanks,' said Holly again. If you didn't know better you would have sworn she was absolutely ecstatic about the prospect of a surface wedding. 'Come on Jake, I want to show you the dress again.' (fairies don't have that stupid suspicion about not seeing the bride in her dress before the wedding day.)

They turned to leave. Just before they were out the door the guy called to them.

'Don't think about selling us out to the LEP.' With that he turned and walked away. Just before they again turned to leave Holly and Julius both noticed a few shimmers walk towards them. They knew they would definitely be watched all night. It was going to be interesting. But it meant they would have to act like a couple all night, meaning they had to keep the act up. They would, of course, not be ..uh… sleeping together, that would be wrong, but if asked, they were going to come out with all that rubbish about waiting until married.

As they left Holly spat out her gum and snaked her own hand around Julius' waist. They definitely looked like the perfect couple. They walked back to their apartment slowly, they didn't want to get lost, how would they explain that they didn't know where their own home was located?

They walked mostly in silence, a lot closer than they would have done under normal circumstances. When they reached their front door Julius said to Holly, or rather Jake said to Tanya, 'I get to carry you over this threshold tomorrow, you'll be my missus.'

Holly just beamed at his in what she hoped would be a convincing way.

'What are we doing tonight?' Holly asked Julius.

'Well, I rented a movie. We could watch that. Take it easy before the big day. We wouldn't want bags under our eyes now, would we?'

'Good idea. Definitely not.'

'Well that's settled then. Should we go in?'

With that they walked through the door and into their apartment. Foaly had shown then a floor plan and told Julius where he would find the bedroom, complete with TV and rented video sitting on top. Holly had to admire the centaur's planning. He had even had some interns put little bits of clutter around the house so that it looked lived in.

They walked into the bedroom and Holly flopped onto the bed, looking for all the world like a tired elf flopping down. Not that she was tired, she was perfectly alert. But the perps weren't to know that.

Julius put the video into he player (fairies don't use DVD's. What do you think they are? Barbarians? They use videodiscs, which they shorten to video) then flopped onto the bed and put his arms around Holly's shoulders. It was a sloppy romantic movie. Something neither of them would ever have watched, but they managed to look interested, and kissed at all the parts where couples who were actually in love would kiss if they were watching the sloppy romantic shit. Julius got up and turned the TV off when the movie had finished. They had each drunk a protein shake during the movie so did not need an evening meal.

It was getting late. It had been a long and eventful day for both of them so they both changed into their sleepwear (Julius found an excuse to go into the bathroom, he didn't have to see Holly naked after all, which actually wouldn't have been that bad… he mentally slapped himself for thinking that) and climbed into bed.

To keep it believable they 'snuggled' up to each other. Julius began to kiss holly and Holly kissed him back. They soon fell asleep. Julius had his arms wrapped around Holly, and Holly had ended up with her head resting on his chest. For some odd reason Holly didn't really mind this at all. She couldn't explain why, it just felt right.

Julius' last thought as he fell asleep was how much he cared for the beautiful elf lying in his arms.

Julius awoke to Holly gently shaking him awake, 'Morning,' she said to him. It was amazing how she could keep up this act for so long, thought Julius. Unless of course it wasn't an act and she really cared about him, he again reprimanded himself for thinking this.

Holly grabbed a couple of nettle smoothies out of the fridge and chucked one to Julius. They drank their breakfast in silence sitting on the end of their bed. Julius had his arm around Holly.

When Holly went to the mirror to brush her teeth she got a shock. Her hair would actually need brushing. Luckily Foaly had thought of this eventuality (she would owe him a carton of carrots) and had provided a hairbrush for her, or rather, made an intern put it in the bathroom.

Brushing hair is a lot harder than it looks, thought Holly. Girls weren't given credit for it nearly enough.

Julius was getting worried. There were some very odd squeaking noises issuing from the bathroom which Holly had entered fifteen minutes previously in order to brush her teeth. He knocked on the door, 'Tanya, are you alright in there?' he called.

A slightly distressed sounding Holly answered, 'I'm trying to brush my hair.'

Julius nearly cracked. He really did. The thought of Holly brushing her hair was most amusing, as all she had ever had before now was a crew cut. He managed to contain his chuckle and went to his wardrobe to get the fifty thousand gold coins out. He knelt on the floor and keyed in the key code. He picked up the bag of gold coins. Wow, he thought, looking at them, the centaur is good, these could pass for real even under scrutiny.

Half and hour later Holy emerged from the bathroom. She had managed to brush her hair. It had proved very difficult to tie it back in an elegant manner, but she had managed to tie it up into a fairly neat ponytail.

'Let's get dressed!' she said excitedly. Both she and Julius were surprised to hear how realistic it sounded.

It took another half hour for Holly to struggle into her dress. She was not happy to be wearing a dress. It would be a great disadvantage to her in any fight. At least Foaly had chosen her a dress with big splits in the side so she had maximum manoeuvrability.

Julius couldn't get over how stunning Holly looked in the dress. Sure, she had looked stunning yesterday, but this was a different kind of stunning. She looked, beautiful. Julius suddenly realised he really was attracted to Holly.

Holly couldn't get over how handsome Julius looked. He really scrubbed up well. His suit was a perfect fit for him. She suddenly realised just how attractive she found him. It was scary.

Both found themselves thinking that they wouldn't mind if they did actually have to get married at this point in time.

Without knowing what they were doing they stepped together and kissed. It was a magical moment and perfect for the mission. Not that either of them were thinking that. The mission part, they were both thinking the magical part. Even if they weren't complete sops.

The people who were watching them were now thoroughly convinced that the two were madly in love and were not going to betray the business to the LEP. It was a constant threat with a business like this. If one couple got cold feet and told the LEP then the whole business was down the drain. So far they had been lucky, little did they know.

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Review Replies:

Stiggy: yayness! You have no idea how long I waited to write that bit, when I desperately wanted to. Oh, very pretty, not exactly filled with people, but enough people go there for a gift shop to be present. Lovely place though, Takahe in particular are very cute. Not even Foaly would get to keep his job if he did that… Hmmm, you never know, how do you know your slave isn't right? Thanks for reviewing.

wackywildcrazy: thanks :)

refloc: aha, that's why they do that. Hmm, H/J is good, and enjoyable, yet difficult to write, such a danger of it being much too… well, out of character. Not that I can talk. I have a feeling, however, that the AF fandom is moving more towards Holly/an-elf-from-the-book (Trouble or Julius) pairings recently, from what I have noticed. There are still the staunch AH supporters, and it is highly likely there always will be, but a lot of new blood is appearing, and not all of it is leaning towards AH.

potter-Dork: thanks.

sergeantstan: thanks. Yes, only a few more chapters.

Thanks to everyone who reads this, and a great big thanks to everyone who reviews. To those of you who read and do not review: a review will earn you your own snazzy reply. To those of you who read and review: thank you so much!