Disclaimer: ¤on leave¤
Chapter 29: Mail Bag
Bernardelli Insurance Society
1282 Main St.
December
ATTN: Personnel Dept.
FROM: Stryfe, Meryl. Field Agent #42
ALSO: Thompson, Milly. Field Agent #64
Dated Rising the 29th.
Effective Heat the 2nd, we have decided to pursue other opportunities and will be terminating our employment with the company. We have enjoyed our time with the company, but feel that extenuating circumstances have made continued employment impossible. Said circumstances will prevent us from tendering our resignations in person as prescribed in Section XI of the Employment Agreement. As such, all claims on severance, reference, and back pay are voided as stated in Section XI.
Signed,
Meryl Stryfe
Milly Thompson
"Are you sure we should do this, Meryl? Maybe we could-"
"No, we're done, and it's time to move on. You haven't forgotten what they tried to do with my luggage, have you?"
Milly's head swung back and forth in reluctant acknowledgement. There wasn't any point in staying on with Bernardelli- they could take their Vice Presidency and stuff it. This just made everything nice and formal. It felt surprisingly good to write it up, even without the satisfying soft taps of the typewriter. Funny, that- It was technically company property, but the typewriter had been with her for so long it just felt like it was hers. However, it was long gone, left back in what had been her apartment. It was doubtlessly in the hands of the feds by now, along with everything else she had owned. It was time to face up to the fact that none of it was coming back, and the handwritten note simply helped draw the line between then and now. She could always get more things. Indeed, she already had a good set of body armor, and one little ring. While a minute quantity compared to what she had, it already felt like more.
Milly, on the other hand...
"What now, Meryl? I don't know what else to do."
"Well, we'll just have to play it by ear for a while. I'm sure we'll find something. Eventually."
Milly just laid a finger aside her head and looked back at her. "But you've already got something. Taking care of Mr. Vash will keep you really busy, won't it?"
"Ugh... I hate to say it, but I think you're right. That man can get himself in more trouble than anything. Just today, I've already had to unhook a cat that had somehow managed to get its claws stuck in his ear, of all things!"
"See? Mr. Vash needs you, and you have him! I'll just have to find something on my own..."
"Oh no you don't. I got us into this mess, and I'm not going to leave you to find your way out alone. We've been a good team, and we'll stay a good team. What kind of leader would I be if I didn't watch out for my comrades? Besides, we're more than that- we're friends."
Milly lunged forward and swept her into a crushing hug. There was no time to react before the air got squeezed out of her by the larger woman's affections. Without missing a beat, she was spun around the room. "Oh Meryl! I'm so happy!"
"..ned ..er."
"What was that Meryl?"
"Need... air..."
"Oops! Sorry!" The big girl dropped her back into her chair. "I guess I overdid it a little..."
A few good lungfulls later she was able to puff out some words. "With that sort of strength, I'm sure we can find something for you. How did you get so strong, anyway?"
"Well, I've always carried around a lot of memories!"
No good response came up, so she just smiled and nodded back. Milly mirrored it, then jumped up and headed for the door. "We need pudding to celebrate! I'll be right back!"
"Celebrate...?" Well, Milly probably had a reason, and they could make time to celebrate whatever evidently needed celebrating. There was just enough time before Milly got back for her to fold the letter, place it in the waiting envelope, and seal it shut.
Dear Mom/Dad/Big Big Sister/...
How are you? Better than me, I hope. I had to quit my job. Well, Meryl said it was already as good as done and it would just make things easier to move on, but I'm not so sure. I mean, I was kind of responsible for getting an office all shot up, and I think I scared some of the people there really badly, but we could've patched things up, right? Well, what's done is done, though it's given me that funny tickle-feeling in my belly, you know, the same as back when me and Meryl got sent out after Mr. Vash the first time.
Oh! And speaking of Mr. Vash, he and Meryl got married, just like I thought they would! Big Big Brother was there, too, and he's still a bit of a meany. He yanked my hair again not five minutes after I met him, though he hasn't done it since. It's really strange, but now that he's stopped I kind of miss him doing it. But anyway, there was another big thing about the wedding that you'll never guess! I got to marry them, just like a priest! And then I did it again for Mr. Julius and Ms. Moore, you know, Big Big Brother's cavalry friends? It was a big surprise, and they were just so happy they could barely manage the I Dos. I think I did well- a few people asked afterward if I could do more marriages!
Oh, and Mr. Vash's family was there too. You already know about his brother, Mr. Knives (he's still nasty, much much worse than anyone else, though I think he's getting better), but it looks like Mr. Vash has a little sister too! Her name's Lina. She was quite a mess- the poor dear was all alone after her granny died, and had been wandering around for ages. I really had to scrub to get her clean, and I'm stuffing her with lots of pudding since she was nearly all bones when Big Big Brother found her. She and Mr. Vash kind of remind me of how Big Big Brother and I used to get along, except they're a little rougher. She's rapidly blossoming into a fine young lady, though I think things may have been better if she had more time. Still, she's really strong, and with a bit of help I'm sure she'll be just fine.
In fact, it sort of feels like one family here. Mr. Vash and Meryl and me and Lina and Mr. Knives, and Mr. Rai Dei who I haven't told you about, and Mr. Marlon, who I also haven't told you about, are all here in one apartment. It's really fun with so many people around. Mr. Rai Dei used to work for Mr. Knives, though he seems to be working for Mr. Vash now. He's a bit confusing, and seems sad at times, but he's so proper and well mannered. He also tells the most wonderful stories! I think he would be a great teacher, he's really good at speaking and knows lots of ways to say something. I'm sure Uncle Larry and him would get along great. Then there's Mr. Marlon, who is nothing less than the best gunsmith anywhere! I'm thinking about dropping the stungun ever since he made me a new one. Well, sort of a new one. It's complicated. I am a bit worried about him, though. He wants to make the world better, for everyone, but seems uncertain on how to do it. I'm sure Mr. Vash can help him. Still, it's quite a mess with so many guys around. Laundry is really hard to do, and the smell- eww!
Well, I wanted to put this off as long as I could, but I really need to say it now. Hopefully the mail will be a bit faster that the other thing. Mom, Dad, I've tried to be good, but somewhere I wasn't, and I've gotten myself in big trouble. I mean big, big trouble. Mr. Marlon brought it in from the post office this morning. I'm Wanted. With a bounty, and everything! It's scary, especially the 'Dead or Alive' part. Surely I've never done anything that bad! I don't know what to do, except to stay around Mr. Vash. He says he'll protect me, but he needs to look after himself too. I first though I could turn myself in, as it surely had to be a mistake, but everyone says that's not what I should do. Even Big Big Brother. He got all angry, then all sad, then angry again, and I had to calm him up. It really isn't his problem, anyway. It's my problem, and I'll deal with it, somehow. I'll keep writing whenever I can, but I don't know how you can write me back. When I was on the road it was hard enough to get your letters, but now... I just don't know. Mr. Vash is going to have his big showdown soon, and then we'll be on the move. We might never stop. I really hope things will work out.
Hugs & Kisses,
Milly
"And that's everyone!" She tapped the pile of letters together, and neatly tied them securely with twine. It wouldn't do to have any of them getting lost, even if they were short this time around. It always got so much easier to think after finishing them all. Well, almost all. She didn't need to write Big Big Brother a letter, since he was right here, and a good dinner was always better than a letter. Now all she had to do was go down to the post office, and... Oh dear.
She couldn't go down there, could she? All the bounty hunters might come after her, even if it meant making a mess of the post office, and then where would everyone get their mail? They really didn't need jail- all it took was a few little copies of her smiling picture plastered under that big scary "WANTED" and she was stuck in a few little rooms anyway. There was no figuring it out. Everything she had done, was done because it was the right thing to do, wasn't it?
And what exactly was an "Enforcer", anyway? The poster said she was one of those for Mr. Vash, but she didn't remember him ever asking her to become whatever an Enforcer was. Maybe it would make more sense if she looked it up, surely there was a dictionary around here...
After a few minutes of unsuccessful searching, she had worked her way around the living room and started on the kitchen when a sudden tapping on her shoulder made her yelp and jump up. Unfortunately, there was a cabinet door open overhead, and her head hit it hard enough for stars to make their way into the kitchen. Mr. Marlon looked agast, but everything hurt too much for her to say anything but "Ow..."
"Are you okay? I'm really sorry, here, sit down and I'll get some ice for that."
She heard Mr. Marlon rummage around while she sat and clutched at the already forming bump. It stung and throbbed, and letting up only made it worse. Squeezing her eyes shut seemed to help.
"Okay, I've got an icepack. Let me see it."
His hands gently moved hers aside, and a wonderful cold feeling began to spread down, numbing the lump.
"Open up, and tell me how many fingers."
"That's silly, everyone has ten. Unless they lose some, that is."
"Er, yeah... You'll be fine."
A short while later, she finally felt good enough to look around and saw Mr. Marlon hovering next to her. "I'm fine, really. Thank you."
"Just making sure. What were you looking for, anyway?"
"A dictionary."
"In the kitchen?"
"Well, things are always in the last place you look, and if I were a dictionary the last place I'd be would be in the kitchen."
Mr. Marlon found something really funny, because he laughed at that. "Can't argue with that! Why don't you try asking me instead, I know a few definitions too."
"What's an Enforcer?"
His grin turned upside down right away. Was that a bad question to ask? Before she could apologize, he jumped in. "It's not good, but it's certainly not you. Just ignore that damn poster. I deserve one far more than you do, you're much better than me."
"But Mr. Marlon, you're the world's best gunsmith! I don't even have a job anymore..."
"Well, I believe that there's a good honest job out there for everyone. I'm sure that yours will come looking for you in due time. However, what a person does is much less important than who they are, and you, Ms. Thompson, are a good person."
"Thank you."
"Don't mention it. Would you like me to fix some breakfast? Can't make anything more complex than cereal, but food's food."
"Breakfast? But isn't it? Oh no! ...I stayed up all night writing my letters again..."
"All night? Must be important letters."
"Oh, they are! I've got to get them mailed right away, but I can't go to the post office with all those bounty hunters out there..."
"Well, why don't I mail them for you? It's the least I can do after giving you that fright."
"You would? Oh, thank you! Now let me fix breakfast, it's much too important to only have some cereal."
He chuckled. "Fine by me. What's on the menu?"
Dear Mom and Dad,
I know you're worried about me so let me assure you that I'm fine. However, things are a lot different for me now. I'm sure you already know all the bad, but there is some good. It's funny, because I never quite saw it coming. There isn't any way to ease this out- I just married Vash the Stampede. No, he didn't use weird psychic powers on me, and no, I didn't get hit on the head. One thing led to another, and it just happened. I feel it's going to be very positive for both of us. I love him, he loves me, and I'm sure you'll understand. However, don't expect grandkids.
I can't help but wonder if things are well with you. I can picture the sort of flak you must be getting over your relation to me. Please, don't try and defend me. If anything, try and distance yourselves from me. I know it may not be easy, but for your own sakes, please do. This is deadly serious business, and while your hearts are doubtlessly in the right place, there are things you're just better off not knowing. Just stay safe.
Meryl
"You know, I could hear you using your business voice while writing that letter."
"Hey, it's not like I'm always writing the things. And what business did you have reading over my shoulder, anyway?"
"Aren't we supposed to share everything now?"
"Why are you asking me? You're supposed to be the expert on marriage! If you insist on sharing everything, I've got a list of supplies that need to be bought. Go put that spiky head to use."
Vash snatched the list, if somewhat reluctantly, and began to read. Before he reached the third item, the brave strong husband crumpled to his knees before her. "Please have mercy, oh great and wonderful one! I'll never peek again!"
She rolled her eyes and sighed. This was too much, even for him. "Well, I usually would, but there is a problem in that there's nobody else that could do it. Milly and I are stuck inside, Lina shouldn't be out alone so you'd have to go anyway, Marlon's off who knows where looking down gun barrels for the fun of it, and do I even have to mention Knives or Rai Dei? You're going, whether you like it or not."
"But Meryl... What if somebody sees me?"
"Then you can tell them that it's for your wife and little sister, who were very insistent on it. And if you still won't go, I'll explain exactly why each and every item is important."
Vash finally slumped down in defeat... Or so she thought. No sooner had she turned away, than Vash sprang for her foot and began to smother it with kisses in a last ditch effort to win a reprieve. Sighing again, she tugged him up by the shirt collar to stare into his face, still puckered up in a smooching state. He whimpered and wiggled the extended lips.
"Well, if you want to that much..."
In one smooth motion she plucked the small paper from his hand and plastered it over his face.
"...then you can kiss my list. Now hurry up!"
He froze, and the list slid down without any more suction to keep it in place. It flipped once in the air and fell right into his hand, after which he finally turned and left, all the while with his face frozen in place. She leaned out after his retreating form.
"When you get back, you'll be compensated. I am a businesswoman, after all. A tough task deserves a good reward..."
Well, there goes another one. Much faster this time, too. There's only one more chapter to go before we hit the big showdown, so you action fans will gets some of what you love!
Wolfwood: Finally! You've been going so slow I could swear we've been in reverse.
Yeah. You try writing one of these.
Wolfwood: Okay. "I came back to life, married big girl, and lived happily ever after. The End." Man, that was tough.
...right.
cjflutterbye: I predict that the groupies shall be rendered a non-issue in about two chapters. Just bear with it.
inkydoo: Exploded beats burned, and it hath come.
Yma: If you like Interlude I, just wait for some of the later ones. I plan to put them where they're most relevant, i.e. Before and/or after chapters that most heavily deal with what's in the interludes. And I see it as a good sort of competition, where it helps all involved move faster and do better.
hope-is-4-ever: From many a night spent contemplating Life, the Universe, and Everything.
Blu: Er, it's not that bad... Is it? I mean, he gets a nifty little tricycle-bike thing to scoot around in now! It even has a little bell he can ring with, uh, his tongue?
Maria: If Knives ever says "Bring me the smaller wench!", you're reading the wrong fanfic. Likely one that's forbidden to be on >
betsytheripper: Uh... Er... Maybe I should hand out cookies that aren't 110 sugar...
Sunsilver: I walk the tightrope all the time while writing. Born to be wild, I guess.
And since Legato demands cruel torment, I give you a dreaded:
Next time, our heroes go camping on a certain mountain 15 iles south of Inepril, on the night of the 3rd. Sleep is unlikely, and you'll never guess who shows up.
...I got the idea from her. ¤points at Yma¤