Reviewers:
lightanddarklove: BB and Raven are like, the cutest couple. Thank you for your darling review andhope to hear from you (when ya review me-I'm keeping my fingers crossed) soon!
Sticklad: Thank you dude. Your poemsseriously rock. You wouldn't be pissed if I asked you to write another, would ya?
pyrotechnic: You're right. Banana's suck. Especially the evil ones.
xox-Leo-xox: Yay Bacon Boy and Cheese man! Thank you so much. I didn't know I was so funny!
kiwi wings: I used to support Cy/Rae, but I much rather prefer BB/Rae and Cy/Bee now. OMG! I totally forgot that I could have been refering to Bob the Banana when I was talking about BB! I mean, uh, it was all part of my dasterdly plan!
Artemis 85: Thank you.
Schnozberry: You too.
iNVERTED: Thank you! I'm really...comedy gold? I like the sound of that...
ALL OTHER REVIEWERS NOT MENTIONED HERE: I am so sorry. My computer crapped up (ie It wouldn't let me see my reviews) and I had to go to my e-mail and check them there. Some were deleted...THANK YOU ALL VERY MUCH AND I'M VERY SORRY FOR NOT RESPONDING TO YOU! I HOPE MY COMPUTER IS FIXED BY THE NEXT TIME I UPDATE: THANK YOU ALL FOR TAKING THE TIME TO REVIEW ME THOUGH!
Note: Hilary Duff bashing-yay!
"Hello everyone!" Staremerald called as she flew on stage. (A.N. A little change never hurt anyone). The crowd was still cheering as enthusiastically as ever. Still floating, she snapped her fingers, and the contestants appeared.
"Hey, how come you can fly?" Hermione asked, noticing that the show host was flying around the room.
"Starfire taught me: 'You must think happy thoughts, friend!', yep, that's what she told me," staremerald said, continuing to soar around.
"Wait, Starfire never tells anyone her secrets," Raven said. "How come she told you?"
"I let her bully Artimis," staremerald said. "You should try it sometime. It's really fun."
"Hey!" Artimis protested.
"So, what happy thought are you thinking about?" Luna asked, dazing off into space.
"Me of course," Darth Vader said smugly, looking at his gloved hand, pretending to be examining his nails. (A.N. Does he even have nails?)
"Sorry Darthy," Staremerald said, landing gracefully on a huge, comfy, soft multi-colored armchair and earning herself a loud cheer from the audience. "I was imagining Kitten and Artimis dying."
"Hey!" Artimis complained. Kitten didn't get it till five seconds later, so she didn't add her arrogant cry of "Hey! You are blessed to even be in my presence!" till then.
"Slow," Raven muttered under her breath.
"Well," staremerald said, snuggling deeper into the armchair, "As most of you remember, it's darling Darthy's turn today."
"Uh, staremerald," Darthy said, stuttering, "Would you…uh…I mean, have you thought about going easier on me at all?" Staremerald looked up at him.
"No-well, yes and no. Yes, I have thought about it, but no, you will suffer along the rest," staremerald said, reaching into her pocket for her mega-cool MP3. (A..N. I might not have an I-Pod, but my MP3 rocks my stripy socks!).
"But-but-I thought you didn't like to see me in pain…" Darthy trailed off. Staremerald had begun laughing.
"Please…" she choked, laughing so hard she began crying, "Who told you that? I love to see everything and everyone in pain!"
"Good luck," Cosmo whispered to Darthy A chair appeared out of the ground and pushed Darth Vader center stage. The remaining contestants immediately sat down. Staremerald snapped her fingers and her hair turned pink.
What was the point of that?
"I dunno…" staremerald said. "Don't you like it?"
NO!
"HEY! DUN BE NO HATA ON MY PINK HAIR!" Staremerald shrieked.
OH SHUT UP!
"Stupid pig…" staremerald muttered, switching her music on and glancing center stage.
You ready for this?
"No-" Darth Vader began.
"Great! Then let's begin!
The lights dimmed and Darthy was suddenly all alone.
"Hello?" he called hesitantly.
Know your stars…know your stars….know your stars…Darth Vader…he wants to be one of the kids on Kids Bop 8!
"What is Kid's Bop?" Darth Vader asked. (A.N. For those of you who don't know, it's a thing they advertise on TV about a CD where kids sing songs like 'Since you been gone' and stuff like that).
Darth Vader...since Padme's gone….he can't breathe for the first time, he's so moving on…yeah yeah!
"To yours truly!" staremerald called loudly.
Darth Vader…wants to be just like Spongebob when he grows up!
"Who is Spongebob?" Darth Vader said, confused.
"He's my homeslice!" Cosmo called out. (A.N. You must put kudos on that!) "Me and him…we're…tight!" (A.N. Another one of my random catchphrases).
Darth Vader...should watch more TV so he knows who I'm talking about so I can annoy him!
"Ha," Darth Vader said smugly. "Up yours!"
Darth Vader…his idol is Hilary Duff!
"She's dumb!" Darth Vader called.
"You guys have Hilary Duff in that galaxy, far, far away?" Luna asked, giving that I-really-want-to-be-there-right-now look.
"Kidding me are you?" Yoda asked. "Hear her all the time we do: 'yesterday so, yesterday so, just a bird that has flown away I am…'". (A.N. Ha. Yoda's so hilarious. If you didn't get which song that was, it was 'So yesterday' which has got to be the dumbest song in existence).
"Darth Vader…isn't there anything that annoys you that I can tease you about?
"Nope," Darth Vader said smugly once more. Suddenly, staremerald immediately began singing.
"…I'm the patron saint of the denial with an angel face and a taste for suicidal cigarettes and ramen and a little bag of dope. I am the son of a b-"
Staremerald! Explicit lyrics!
Staremerald ignored him. "…and Edgar Allen Poe-"
STAREMERALD!
"What?" Staremerald asked, pulling an ear-phone from her ear. "Can't you see I'm trying to hear a good song here?" (A.N. It was 'St. Jimmy' by Green Day, if you guys care).
How can I torture him if you're singing?
"I don't know. Your problem, not mine."
You're such a b-
"Big mysterious voice! Explicit language," staremerald scolded.
OH SHUT UP!
"Stupid pig…" staremerald muttered, switching her music back on and. She twirled a strand of pink hair around her finger.
Darth Vader…hey, can I call you Darthy?
"No-" Darth Vader began.
Darthy…he's a bed-wetter!
"What? That's not true!" Darth Vader tried to stand up from his seat, but it pulled him back down again.
Darthy…is denying the truth which obviously means he's a bed-wetter!
"What?" Darth Vader repeated more menacingly. But the big mysterious voice wasn't put off. He had finally found a weak spot.
Darthy…haven't all you guys wondered where his zipper is on those pants he wears?
"Yeah, yeah, I have!" Kitten said, but staremerald shot her a death stare.
"You should not even be looking there…"
Darthy…he has to wear pampers to bed! Padme was always so embarrassed, but Darthy was happy. He was a big boy, wearing big boy underwear!
"WHAT?"
Darthy…he's a big kid now!
"I do not wet the bed!"
Sure you don't! Darthy…is obviously very embarrassed about his bed-wetting situation! What's wrong Darthy? Pampers to itchy for ya?
"I DO NOT WEAR PAMPERS!"
Sure you don't! Darthy…not only does the loser wet the bed…but he wants to forget that dream of becoming Spongebob and become…A SINGER!
"WHAT!"
Darthy…this is all a bit over whelming for the loser. Not only has he become a singer, but he also has become a big-boy…sigh…it seems like only yesterday he was riding a bike with training wheels…
"I have proof!" Artimis ran forward, holding a pink bike with purple handles and pink tassels. The bike had training wheels on it. "Look!" he called, happy to be teasing someone again. "He still has training wheels on it! He-" suddenly, Artimis began choking. Staremerald glanced suspiciously at Darthy, who was slowly closing his fingers, using the force to choke Artimis. He looked up at her, embarrassed to be caught, but she nodded at him to continue. No one else noticed. They were all to busy watching Artimis choke and cheering at the fact that he was in pain.Staremerald grinned. Revenge time.
"Can you shut up?" she asked Artimis. "Or at least, die more quietly? I can't hear my music…"
Darthy…he is really Avril Lavienge in disguise!
"Oh man, why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?" Darthy said, groaning.
Avril Lavienge…told y'all he was a singer!
"Not true!" Darthy protested. The big mysterious voice ignored him and continued.
And now you know Avril Lavienge, the bed-wetter!
"HEY! YOU DON'T KNOW ME! DON'T IGNORE ME!" Darthy shrieked.
"What is your problem?" Hermione asked, looking at him strangely.
"Well, it's werid: you see, sometimes I get so weird, I even freak myself out."
"No really? I never would have guessed…" Hermione said, bored. She began watching Artimis, who was still choking.
"I laugh myself to sleep it's my…lullaby, in a way," Darthy said. Artimis' cell phone rang. Darthy let him go and Artimis asked:
"Hello?" Then he grinned. "Yeah, Stacey, can I come over after school? Well, not really school, but when I get home? We can hang around by the pool." He paused. "Yeah, did your mom get back from her business trip? Is she there, or is she trying to give me the slip?" He waited again. "What do you mean you don't know?" He groaned and then hung up.
"Who was that?" Hermione asked icily.
"Stacey," Artimis said.
"Another one of your numerous girlfriends?" Hermione said dangerously.
"Well, not really Stacey…but Stacey's mom…" he sighed. "Man, she's got it going on…"
"I WILL GET REVENGE ON YOU!" Darthy screamed at the ceiling. "THEN YOU SHALL PAY! WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOU KNEW…?" He began crying. "SOMEONE PLEASE: I CAN'T HANDLE THIS CONFUSION, I'M UNABLE COME AND TAKE ME AWAY!"
"Uh…what does Ungraphitable mean?" Luna asked plainly.
"Yeah, well, uh, next week we'll have Luna," staremerald said, looking embarrassed as her future-husband continued crying and yelled: "I'D RATHER BE ANYTHING BUT ORDINARY PLEASE!"
Author's Note: Here's your chance to be in my story! First reviewer to tell me the four Avril Lavinege songs Darthy kept singing (by accident when he was speaking) will be featured in the next chapter. Tell me your hobbies, and your style. Are you a girl? A boy? Are you nerdy? Are you bubbly? Are you gothic?-I will have to make a best judgement on what I think you're like, so don't flame me if I make you friends with a star you hate!
FLAMERS AND HATERS BOUNCE OFF THIS PAGE! I DO NOT ACCEPT FLAMES!
And as always:
Review!