Chapter Three
Valon rolled over in bed, annoyed at whatever force was pulling him out of his slumber. He did not want to have to get up already. He worked the late shift at the local Domino's Pizza and never returned home before one in the morning. That should entitle him to being able to sleep in. Yawning, he burrowed deeper into the pillow.
As he drifted back into the state between consciousness and sleep, various memories from different times in his life swirled through his mind. He recalled the orphanage, where he had stayed with Mother Mary. Then there was the prison, where he had gone after he had beaten the gang members in a fit of fury. Why had he done that? He searched through the fragments of recollections for the answers.
He had been angry. . . . The church had burned down, and they had been laughing. He had been certain that they had done it, especially when they had begun their cruel taunts. That was why he had attacked. Then the police had found the scene and had arrested him. Later, after the gang had recovered from the beating, they had been sent there as well.
He had hated prison. He had been treated cruelly, and just as another hardened criminal, even though he was only a minor and had only been angry because he had believed that the gang had deliberately burned the church down to kill Mother Mary. The guards had always been rough with him, and when he had struggled against them, they had only become more angry and eventually had thrown him into solitary confinement. He still did not think that was fair.
He rolled over, opening his eyes and staring at the floor. It was not likely that he would go back to sleep. Now he was remembering how he had gotten out of prison. Dartz had been in league with the prison warden and had arranged for Valon to be sent to that dueling island, knowing that Valon would be the one to make it through. He realized that now. He had gotten into one disaster after another, making a mess out of his life.
But I never really had a real family before, he thought to himself. I never would have found Raph and Alister if Dartz hadn't done stuff to bring me into Doom. So . . . was it all worth it in the end?
He knew that he had grown and matured since then. But he did not think it was fair that Mother Mary had had to die, and he still did not understand why it had been that way. She had always been a kind, righteous person and had always strived to help anyone in need. If God existed, why had He not saved such a faithful servant of His? Why had Valon's rebellious, confused life been spared instead?
He had not been able to do much, if anything, to help his friends. He was always getting into trouble, and they were always helping him to get out of it. He sighed. If they were in trouble, would he be able to save them? Or would they be taken from him too? He had not been able to save Mother Mary.
Sometimes he found that he could actually understand Alister's fears of opening his heart. It made sense that the redhead had been afraid. All of his loved ones had died in the past, during the war. Valon had thought it was painful to lose the one person who had loved him. Alister had lost many. And of course Raphael had as well. They were three lost souls, trying to find their way together.
And of course Valon was able to better relate to Alister after his bout of amnesia. When Alister had found him wandering around the city, it had taken a great deal of trust for the Australian to actually go with Alister. He had not wanted to trust the unusual gray-eyed man at first, but at last he had decided to give Alister the benefit of the doubt and find out if he had been telling the truth. There had been times when he had still doubted after that, but of course in the end he was grateful that he had agreed to trust Alister. He still wondered occasionally if Alister was truly thankful that he had opened his heart, but he supposed that the redhead definitely was, or he would not have tried so hard to get Valon to come with him when the brunette had amnesia.
He stretched and yawned, sitting up. Still feeling sleepy, he turned on the radio and discovered Christmas music playing. Mumbling to himself, he climbed out of bed and shuffled to the window. Crystal white snowflakes greeted him, dancing and twirling to the ground.
"Oy," he muttered. "It's like a Christmas card or a snowglobe or somethin'."
He had never had much reason to celebrate holidays. When he had been at the orphanage, he had participated in the festivities for occasions like Thanksgiving and Christmas (mainly the food), but afterwards he had not. He and the other two bikers had celebrated last year, however, and he supposed that they would do so again this year. They had had Thanksgiving dinner several days ago, and they were still trying to sort through the leftovers. All were trying to find creative ways to use turkey, and of course Liu was gleefully helping.
Down the hall he heard the shower come on. So somebody else was up. But that was not really a surprise. Valon was usually the last of the three to awaken.
Raphael was the first. He was a morning person, and he had to be up early to get to work at the insurance company. Wearing a suit and sitting at a desk did not especially please him, but the pay was good—and they definitely needed it. Valon had taken the pizza delivery job when they had been really hard-pressed for money. That was when Alister had revealed that he had been working at home, building websites. (Being as anti-social as he is, Alister had not wanted to pick a job that involved interaction with people.) Their finances had started to level out now, much to all of their relief.
The brunette wandered out into the hall, blinking as he saw Liu playing with a large white feather. He had arrived home late the previous night, and Raphael had been asleep by then. Alister had waited up for Valon, but he had been half-asleep and he had not explained anything about Alexander, so the sight of the feather was highly confusing to Valon.
"Where the heck did you get that, kitty?" he said aloud. Liu mewed, throwing the feather into the air and then leaping to catch it. Valon shook his head, turning to head downstairs.
He was appropriately stunned to see a black-clad creature stretched out on the couch, its mismatched wings spread out on the back of the piece of furniture. It looked up at him, blinking, and then grinned. "Hi!" it said cheerily, as Valon simply stared in disbelief.
While it was late morning in Domino City, Oregon, it was already evening across the world in Germany. Leonhard was just finishing watching the DVD of Disney's Beauty and the Beast when he realized that he heard the grand piano down the hall being played. He blinked, turning to gaze down the corridor. Was his brother playing it? The last he had known, the man had come home from work and had gone into his home office.
Siegfried very rarely played the piano. He was usually too busy, or he was reclining in other ways. But when he did go to the piano, he could play for some time. Their mother had seen to it that he had taken lessons as a child, and he did not mind that now, though at the time he had been irritated.
Leonhard observed that the current piece was quiet and melancholy. Siegfried had a certain fascination with somber things. Many myths and operas often were not happy. Leonhard was not certain why Siegfried liked such things, but he had to wonder if his brother felt sad sometimes when he played the piano. He was certain that Siegfried often did not feel as happy as he usually appeared to be.
The boy slowly got up, walking down the hall to the room where the piano was. As he entered, he saw Siegfried sitting on the bench. The man touched the keys gently and gracefully, gazing far off into the distance as he played the memorized piece. Silently Leonhard came over, placing his hands on the side of the instrument as he listened to and watched his brother's private recital.
As Siegfried finished, he looked over at Leonhard and started. He had been so caught up in his thoughts that he had not even noticed his younger brother's approach. Then he smiled at the child. "Hello, Leonhard," he greeted, leaning back.
Leonhard smiled in return, slowly sitting down on the edge of the bench. "Is everything okay?" he asked hesitantly.
"Of course," Siegfried replied. "I simply felt that it was time I played something again. I never seem to have the time anymore." It had been a hectic day at the company, and Armina had continued to act odd—as if she was trying to stay aloof while at the same time feeling as though she would break down and cry. He had to wonder what on earth had happened.
Then there was the mystery of who had hijacked the KaibaCorp truck and taken the duel disks. As Armina had predicted, some of the tabloids had picked up the story and were blaming SchroiderCorp, calling the hijacking another of Siegfried's tricks. Siegfried was annoyed by this. He never would have done something so petty, and certainly he never would do it now, after the Grand Prix fiasco. But people with intelligence did not believe tabloids anyway.
Leonhard reached out, gently brushing a long section of Siegfried's hair back over his shoulder. "You look really tired, Elder Brother," he observed quietly.
"It was a long day," Siegfried told him.
He tried to think back to what Armina had told him about herself during the job interview several months previous. She had actually said as little as possible, preferring to give short, straight to the point answers to his questions. When he had asked about her family, she had mentioned that she had several sisters but no other living relatives. He wondered if the email she had received pertained to those sisters. Perhaps he should call her and ask how she was doing. He could certainly relate to being concerned if siblings were hurt or in trouble.
Leonhard looked down at the piano keys, then back up at his brother. "It was nice to hear you play again," he said then, smiling a bit. "It's been a while. . . ."
Siegfried smiled slightly as well. "It relaxes me," he answered, beginning another quiet, reflective melody.
Shortly after this, Siegfried did indeed try to call Armina, but he was greeted only with her answering machine. He left a short message and then hung up, wondering where his secretary had gone. Most likely she was trying to resolve her problem, whatever that was. But she had not wanted to tell him about it anyway, and he was not one to pry.
He looked up when Leonhard came running into the room, his hazel eyes wide in panic and bewilderment. Siegfried stood up, coming over to him. "What is it, Leonhard?" he asked, narrowing his eyes as he saw the boy's expression.
"Siegfried," Leonhard gasped in between breaths, "someone collapsed on our porch! Heidi found her and brought her in."
Siegfried frowned deeply and got up, intending to go investigate for himself. "Is she badly hurt?" he asked.
Leonhard nodded. "She's bleeding really badly and she's not conscious." He paused, hesitating, and then revealed why he was so bemused. "Siegfried, she looks like one of your Valkyrie cards!"
Siegfried stared at him. He was about to say that was impossible, but he supposed it truly was not. After all, so many other Duel Monsters had been seen wandering about. And he had wondered why the Valkyries had not seemed to be amongst them.
Quickly he followed Leonhard out the door.
Valon continued to stare at Alexander in disbelief. "What the heck are you?" he finally burst out. "And why do you look like Alister?" This was highly disturbing to him, as it had been to Raphael. Valon had never seen a picture of Alister as a child, but if he had he would find the resemblance quite unsettling.
"I am Alister!" Alexander declared in his soft voice, sitting up. He blinked at Valon, sorting through the information he had about him from Alister's memories. The Australian had annoyed Alister at first, and they still did not always get along, but they had become close friends. Alexander was certain that Valon would be happy, as would Raphael, that Alexander was going to fulfill Alister's deathwish. After all, they would want their friend to be truly happy.
Valon gawked, then narrowed his eyes. "That's crazy!" he snapped. "Alister's upstairs. His hair's darker than yours, and he doesn't have wings! What kinda costume is that anyway?" He stalked over, grabbing the angel wing to pull on it and see how real it was. After all, he was certain that it was an elaborate joke and that he could expose the intruder's prank in a moment.
Instantly Alexander retaliated, slapping Valon with the wing and sending him stumbling back. "They're mine," he replied angrily. "You can't pull them off." Even though he was usually sweet, he was not defenseless, and he would not stand for anyone poking and prodding at him as if he was some kind of science experiment.
Valon sneezed violently from the white feathers that had tickled his nose, then looked up when he heard Alister's voice.
"What's going on here?" The redhead had heard the commotion and hence, had come downstairs to find out what was going on. Now he frowned, gazing at the scene before him. This, then, had to be the creature that Raphael had described. And Alister could see that it truly did resemble him, though when Alexander looked over at him with bright, loving eyes, Alister was reminded more of his younger brother Miruko. This whatever it was had a definite childlike appearance.
Before he quite knew what was happening, Alexander had ran forward and glomped him. Alister tensed, feeling the creature's adoring embrace, and then looked down at it when it looked up.
"I'm so glad to finally see you," Alexander exclaimed, still in that soft, yet cheerful voice. "I never got to see you before, when I lived in your heart. I only got to experience your feelings." He reached up and stroked Alister's hair, much to Alister's chagrin. "I sensed when you were happy, or sad, or angry . . . or heartbroken . . . or panicked. . . ." But despite never actually having before seen Alister face to face, he had recognized him instantly. It was a special sense that he possessed, and that he did not find strange or out of the ordinary at all. Why should he not recognize Alister, when he had always watched over him and when Alister had given him physical form in order for him to grant Alister's wish?
Valon could only gape at this scene. Due to not having been told about Alexander, he was so terribly baffled. And he could see that Alister was not happy about the affection Alexander was showing to him. Alister was not the kind of person who was often physically affectionate, with hugs and such. Alexander appeared to be his polar opposite.
Finally finding his voice, the brunette burst out, "What do you think you're doing! Let him go!" He made a move forward to pull Alexander away, but Alister struggled out of the embrace before Valon had crossed the room.
"Raphael said that you want to kill me," Alister said flatly, searching Alexander's ice-blue eyes for the truth behind what he was doing. "He said that you think I want to die." Now that he was seeing Alexander, and hearing him, he knew that this was the being from his dreams. He had been dreaming about this odd creature months before, for some reason. They must have some sort of connection, but he did not understand what that would be.
"Of course I do!" Alexander declared, while Valon gave an indignant cry—both at Alexander's confirmation and at the realization that he had once again been left out of something important.
Without warning Alexander began flapping his wings, becoming airborne. He hovered in the air near the ceiling, looking down at Alister and Valon. "I hate your friends, Alister," he said softly. "You love them, and I have to be everything you're not. I have to love what you hate. That's why I love you. That's why I have to do this." A turquoise glow abruptly shot forth from his hands and Alister gave a yell of pain as he was thrown harshly to the floor. It felt as though his body was on fire. The blast caused the front door to be thrown open as well, but this was ignored.
Furious now, Valon ran forward and stood in front of his dazed friend. "Now just wait a minute!" he yelled with outstretched arms. "I dunno who you are, or where you came from, but you're crazy! You can't just go murderin' my chum because you feel like it!" His blue eyes flashed. "You'll havta go through me first!"
Alexander blinked at him, obviously confused. "Murder?" he repeated. "Oh no! I'd never do that." In his childlike mind, to murder meant to kill someone out of hate. And that was not what he was trying to do. He was going to kill Alister out of love. All he wanted was to make the gray-eyed man happy.
Valon's mouth dropped open. "Then what do you think you're doing?" he snapped.
Alister slowly sat up, rubbing his head. He looked up at Valon, realizing that the Australian was trying to protect him, and was touched by that. They had come a long way from how they had disliked and completely misunderstood each other during Doom.
The crimson-haired man turned his gaze to Alexander, who was still hovering in the air and now looked worried. Alister frowned, wondering what was wrong. This odd thing disturbed him, but at the same time Alister felt a certain pity for it. The poor creature only wanted to do what Alister wanted, though he was terribly mistaken on what that was. And Alister himself had sometimes tried to deal out justice without actually knowing what he had been doing. He regretted that now, and he knew that if Alexander continued his assault, the creature would regret that.
"I'd never murder anyone!" Alexander said again, vehemently. "I know I hate Valon and Raphael, but I can't hurt them! You love them, Alister, and I can't hurt what you love." He looked at Alister, pleading with his eyes for understanding. Did Alister not realize that Alexander only wanted his happiness? Valon certainly did not seem to understand, and this puzzled the winged boy. Raphael had not understood either.
"Oh sure," Valon cried now, before Alister could respond, "but you can hurt what you love!" He was so caught up in the moment that he did not hear the bathroom door opening as Raphael stepped out. The brunette felt a certain hatred welling in his heart. He was just remembering Alister again, and now this bizarre intruder wanted to take his friend away. Well, he would not let it happen. No matter what he had to do, he would see to it that Alister would not die by this being's hands.
Alexander blasted Alister again, more fiercely this time and sending him crashing against the staircase. "He wants to die!" he answered. "I have to fulfill whatever he wants, because that's why I'm here. I wouldn't exist if Alister didn't want me to. He wished me into existence because his will to die was so strong!"
Alister struggled to get up, crashing on the stairs after several failed attempts and several more attacks from Alexander. The blasts were harsh, and they drained him of his strength. Then he felt firm hands grip him under his arms and help him to stand. He looked up at Raphael gratefully before turning his gaze to Alexander.
"I don't know where you got your ideas," he said quietly, "but I don't want to die." His eyes narrowed as his expression became firm. As he said the words, he knew they were true. He wanted to live. He had to live, for his friends. He wanted to be with them. Someday he would get to be with his brother again, but for now he had another family and he could not and would not desert them.
Alexander felt his heart twisting in confusion. "No!" he burst out. "That isn't true! I felt your pain . . . I felt it for years! I felt your desire to die grow until it was almost over-whelming." He swallowed hard, tears glistening in his eyes. "It was so hard . . . to know that I couldn't do anything to ease your pain. I had to just sit there, feeling what you were feeling and knowing that you would never kill yourself. For you to die, someone else had to make it happen." His wings flapped slower now, lowering him to halfway between the ceiling and the floor.
"Then . . . then for a while, your desire to die was quelled." Alexander smiled sadly. "I was glad then, because I knew that you would be happy living. But when you summoned me, you were in so much pain again!" He held up his fists, clenching them and still feeling bewildered. Was it conceivable that Alister truly did not want to die again? But that could not be true! Alister's longing for death had given Alexander physical form. "You were going to kill your friends against your will . . . and you couldn't bear that. You were begging and pleading to be allowed to die yourself! I heard you again, and I wanted more than anything to be let out so I could help you, and then it happened!"
Alister gazed at him, a sudden realization shooting through his soul. Alexander had been created when Alister had been in the penalty game with Raphael and Valon. It was true—Alister had wanted to die then. That had been the prevailing emotion, and Alexander had felt that. Alister still did not understand exactly how the being could exist, but things were slowly starting to make more sense.
Raphael looked at the creature coldly. "Let me ask you something," he asked.
Alexander tilted his head to the side. "What's that?" Now he wanted to go home to Dartz and ask him about what Alister's friends had been saying to him. He was so very confused now! He was certain that he was not trying to commit murder, and that his intentions were not evil, but to listen to Valon, it certainly seemed that way. Why were things not going the way he had planned? Why had Alister said he did not want to die? Had it just been because of Valon's and Raphael's presence? Maybe Alister knew that they would not be happy and so he did not want them to know of his truest desire. Yes, that would make sense.
"If you hate everything Alister loves, does that mean you hate his little brother too?" Raphael was not certain what to make of Alexander. It did seem that the boy was sincere and did not mean any true harm, but it angered Raphael that Alexander had suddenly appeared and was trying to kill Alister. He could see how the blasts had weakened the younger man, even though Alister was trying to not let it be known. Raphael had known him long enough to recognize when he was trying to hide his true condition. Alister was greatly suffering right now, and that worried Raphael immensely.
Alexander froze, just staring at Raphael before turning his gaze to Valon and finally, to Alister. He had never thought about that before. He should hate Miruko, he realized. But wait—Alister loved all children. If Alexander hated Miruko, he should also hate Chris, and he loved her. He felt dizzy suddenly. "I . . . I don't know," he admitted softly. The new information he was receiving was overwhelming his innocent mind. The world really was complicated, was it not? Alexander himself was complicated. Did he even know for certain who he was and what Alister wanted?
He tried to shake off the doubts. It had to be what he had determined—that Alister was only saying that he wanted to live because his friends would be upset if he said the truth! After all, how could anyone know Alister better than Alexander himself? He had always been with Alister, through everything. Now that he had been given a physical body in order to complete his mission, he could not fail. That would not be fair to Alister, nor would it show gratitude to him.
But what if he could no longer properly sense Alister's feelings since he had been given the corporeal form? He had believed that Alister's desires had stayed the same, but it had been months since then. What if Alister now had a different wish, and Alexander would be destroying it by killing him? It was too much to digest at once. If that was true, then Alexander had not been making Alister happy at all. If it was true, then . . . then Alexander had already failed in what he had been trying so desperately to do.
"I'm going to come back," he said finally, as all three bikers looked at him—a variety of feelings obvious from their eyes. Raphael looked suspicious and distrusting. Valon looked angry and hateful. And Alister looked indescribable. Was he sad? Was he upset? He did not look happy, but Alexander knew that it had been ages since he had actually felt happiness radiating from Alister's soul. He had wanted to see Alister look happy as he died, and to know that he had finally been able to accomplish what he had always longed to when he had felt Alister's pain.
"Why don't you just go crawl back into whatever pit you came from!" Valon snapped, clenching his fists. It was obvious to him how much pain Alister was in. He looked close to collapsing. Maybe, Valon feared, Alister would still die. They did not know how strong the blasts had been that Alexander had used, nor the extent of what they would cause. "I mean, you've caused enough trouble, haven't you!"
Alexander swallowed hard, looking to Alister for some sort of response. The other redhead swayed dangerously before gripping the end of the banister with a shaking hand. He looked up at Alexander again, his eyes clear for one brief moment before the dizziness took over. "I know you want to help," he said quietly, "but I want to live. Alexander, that's the truth." Upon saying this, Alister crumpled to the floor in a dead faint. The blasts that Alexander had used had been meant to kill, and they were very painful. Alister had struggled to stay conscious, but he had failed in the end.
An arrow slammed into Alexander's heart. His wings ceased to flap entirely and he fell to the floor on his knees, watching blankly as Valon and Raphael—and Liu as well—rushed to their friend's aid.
Tears sprang to his eyes and spilled over as he gripped the carpet. "No," he whispered, "no. . . . I only wanted to make him happy. . . . I didn't want him to suffer any more! I thought . . . I thought I could finally fulfill his wishes and do something to help him, but . . . but I've killed him when he didn't want it!" He had recognized the look Alister had given him right before collapsing. That look had held nothing but sincerity. Alister had not been making stories up. Now he truly did want to live, but Alexander had tried to take him away from what he wanted.
The pitiable creature did not stop to think that if Alister was truly dead, he, Alexander, would cease to exist as well. He had known that before, but now he was too upset. His reason for living was now gone. He did not know Alister as well as he had thought. He had not known what would make Alister truly happy now, and the realization that his actions were not what Alister wanted was too much to bear.
He watched as Raphael laid Alister down on the couch. The body was so limp. . . . Alister looked so pale and cold and still. . . . Was that what it was to die? Was the agony that Alexander was experiencing the same agony that Alister's friends were now going through?
Valon suddenly ran over, standing in front of Alexander with hate burning in his blue eyes. "Are you happy now?" he yelled. "Come on, are you? You got what you wanted, didn't you? You killed him! You killed him!" He grabbed the creature's demon wing, nearly crushing it in his hands. Alexander just stared at him blankly, not even making a move to defend himself now. What was the point? If Alister was dead against his will, and Alexander had caused it, then he had no reason to want to protect himself—or to live.
Then Raphael's voice cut through the silence that followed. "Valon . . . that's enough," he said quietly. "Alister is still alive. Leave that . . . leave him alone and come over here." He growled low, not certain what to call Alexander. The being had never given them a name, only The Angel of Death. How had Alister known a name to call him by? But such questions could wait. They were of little important right now. "I'm angry too, but that's not gonna solve anything." Gently he laid a hand on Alister's forehead. Their friend did not have a fever, but he was laying silent and still. Then he moaned weakly in pain.
Valon continued to grip furiously at the wing, but he knew Raphael was right. Alister needed their help now. Slowly he let go, watching the appendage fall lifelessly to the floor. Then, without a word, he went over to the couch and knelt down on the carpet beside it, proceeding to check Alister's vital signs.
Raphael looked over at Alexander. "You should leave now," he spoke then, his voice still tinged with the anger he felt. He knew he needed to see things from Alexander's point of view as well as his own, but it was hard. Alister was laying hurt because of that entity's actions. It would take Raphael a while to cool down from this experience, even though he did know that Alexander had not wanted to do anything wrong.
Alexander nodded shakily, but continued to kneel on the floor where he was. His mind was blank. He could not even think of how to get up. All he could think of was how Alister was in pain, and he had caused it.
When Dartz entered through the open door and found Alexander in his current state, he cursed in his mind. He had come too late. Alister was . . . hopefully just hurt, for Alexander's sake, but the creature was obviously in mental anguish anyway. It was as the Atlantean had feared—Alexander now knew that this was not what Alister wanted. And from what Dartz knew about the strange boy, he wondered if Alexander would ever get over this.
The turquoise-haired man knelt down, as of yet unnoticed by the two conscious bikers, and looked into the winged being's agonized blue eyes. Then Alexander moved closer to him, almost hesitantly, and laid on the floor, laying his head on Dartz's lap as he regretfully cried.