Disclaimer: I do not own House, unfortunately. I do, however, own the right to hog-tie him under my bed. Lol. Please read and review.

Frustrated, House slammed his cane down onto his desk and wheeled around to face Wilson, who was sitting in one of the extra office chairs.

"Frustrated?" his best friend asked innocently.

Wilson could have swore that House growled under his breath.

"Two months!" he exclaimed. "Two months of trying and she isn't pregnant yet! What the hell do I have to do to knock that woman up!"

"Nice wording," Wilson replied dryly.

"It's the truth!"

"Maybe you haven't been trying hard enough."

House looked over at him, eyebrows raised. "Trust me, it isn't from the lack of trying. And we've both been tested for…"

"Fertility problems."

"Yeah, that. And it's not that either. I just don't get it."

House flopped into his chair and looked over at Wilson; face pleading for help. His friend sighed.

"Maybe it's not the right time. Why is it so important to have one right now?"

"It's not. It's just … okay. Remember last month when everyone had the flu?"

Wilson nodded. Poor Allison had come down with it for a week. House had stocked up on so much cold medicine that his medicine cabinet had looked like a pharmacy.

"Well," he continued to explain," Allison came down with it when it was first going around. The first day, she bolted to the bathroom to throw up. When she came out, she told me that she was going to go into work a little early. When I got there about an hour later, I found her in the lab, crying. I asked her what was wrong and she just pushed a piece of paper towards me that said she had taken a pregnancy test. It was negative."

"She thought the flu was her being pregnant?" Wilson asked.

"Yep."

"Wow."

"And here's the kicker. She wiped her eyes, said she was being silly in the first place, then went in for clinic duty."

Wilson sat back, letting House's words sink in. Allison HAD been pretty quiet the week she had been sick.

"She wouldn't let me get anywhere near her for a week and a half."

"Where is she now?"

"Drawing another test. She hasn't been able to keep anything down for two days and wants to make sure it isn't a repeat of the flu. Speaking of which, I'm hungry. Lunch?"

Wilson nodded and they headed down to the cafeteria.

"I wouldn't mind her not being pregnant, it's just that sex… it's like a chore now."

"Well you are trying to accomplish something."

House just nodded. They reached the cafeteria and after picking up their usual, made their way to a table in the back. They had just settled down when Cameron came running up to them with her eyes sparkling with excitement.

"Not that I didn't mind the Baywatch repeat, but what's wrong?" House asked.

Wordlessly, she handed him a small piece of paper that said he was going to be a dad.

"You mean…"

"Yep," she stated proudly. "I'm pregnant."

"My God!" Wilson exclaimed loudly. "You actually managed to knock her up!"

Everyone in the cafeteria stopped what they were doing and stared at them. House rolled his eyes.

"Yes, people," he sarcastically stated loudly. " I managed to knock up my future wife who's almost half my age. And yes, I do have sex. Anybody need to say something?"

At the end of his speech, everyone's eyes were back to where they belong. Embarrassed, Cameron sat down into a chair next to them.

"Nice Greg."

"They should learn not to stare!"

Wilson just shook his head. This was going to be a long day.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Long day was an understatement. By the time they had gone back up to the office, almost the entire hospital knew. Even patients had come up and bugged him. Six o'clock couldn't come soon enough. What really sucked was that he couldn't even avoid Cuddy because now he had to avoid everyone. Foreman and Chase seemed to take it upon themselves to be the little runts that pointed everyone in his direction. After he gave each one a good whack with his cane, he sent them home and resigned himself to his office with the drapes shut. Cameron joined him five minutes later and hid out with him until it was almost time to go. About ten minutes before they could actually leave, Stacy came barging in. House turned to Cameron.

"Do we have some kind of homing device on us that I'm not aware of?"

Stacy rolled her eyes. "Are you really pregnant?"

Cameron nodded.

"About a month and a half."

House looked over at Stacy.

"You know," she informed him, "She's been pregnant before."

"I know."

"Then you know not to get your hopes up. She might miscarry again and I wouldn't want to be in that much pain."

There was only silence as the couple could only stare at her with their mouth open. Then, before House could stop her, Cameron had bolted out of her seat at Stacy. A quick punch and she was down. Cameron was livid.

"Don't you ever talk about that again! You have no idea what I went through! You ever mention that again and I'll make sure you can't talk at all!"

House had made it around the desk by now, He grabbed Cameron before she could do anymore damage and made her sit down. He turned to Stacy who had just stood up, a hand against her cheek.

"Leave," he ordered coldly.

"I just wanted to warn-"

"Leave."

This time he took a step towards her and she left, slamming the door behind her. He heard a sob and saw Cameron hunched over, head in her hands. He took her arm and when she stood, wrapped his arms around her.

"I didn't…" she sobbed. " I couldn't help it. I didn't want… to lose the baby. Or hit her. I couldn't help it."

He had no response. He could only hold her until she cried herself out. When she was done, he pulled back and looked into her puffy face.

"Okay?"

She nodded.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I hated this shirt anyways."

"No, about Stacy."

"You haven't done anything that a lot of people haven't wanted to do for a while now. If she had been a guy, I would have decked her already. She knows better. Now, let's go home and pig out on something. Your pick."

"Italian."

He handed her his cell phone and grabbed their bags as she ordered. No one stopped them from leaving a little early. They had all heard the commotion and wanted Stacy to leave Cameron alone. Nice to know the hospital staff was good for something.