Lily and James - A Love Story
Chapter 4 - A Small Victory
Lily stirred in her sleep, her nightmares assaulting her as her state of consciousness became a more natural sleep rather than one caused by exhaustion and emotional pain. She dreamt that their son had been born and that he was snatched from her arms on the eve of his birth by a masked wizard. Crying out in her sleep, she startled herself awake and looked for her husband, frantically needing him to be with her.
Giving Sirius their special Marauder shake, he watched his friend as he left, feeling a deep need to sleep himself and trying to fight it for the sake of holding his vigil for his wife. Things were going to be rough for the next few days. Perhaps a quiet funeral and finally, plans for going into hiding. They could hide Lily's news for a while but not too long, he figured. Hearing some slight moaning from the other room, James scooped up his vial from the counter and made his way through the door, just in time to hear Lily cry out.
Double stepping, he was at the side of his wife in a moment, slipping the vial into his breast pocket in the meantime. Holding her shoulders just to let her know that he was there, he hushed her, "Lily, it's okay. I am right here," he said softly.
Lily looked at James and wrapped her arms around him. All of the things that had happened came back to her in a flood---the news that they were going to be parents, the prophecy, and the news of her parents' deaths.
Looking at James, she said sadly, "I was hoping that it was all a nightmare, that our son really wasn't a possible part of a prophecy and that my parents were still alive. But it isn't, is it? It's all true."
Glancing around the room, she found a scrap of paper on the floor and reached down to pick it up. It was part of a letter from the Auror department at the Ministry of Magic, a piece that Sirius had dropped, "James? Did an owl come for me from the Ministry?" Just then, an owl flew in the window and dropped a letter on her lap, "Well, if this is for me, who did the other note go to?" She said, picking up the note and wondering about it. It couldn't be good news, an owl from them this late at night.
Taking Lily in his arms when she grabbed for him, he just held her tight for as long as she wished to do so. When she pulled back, he wished he could grin or had something encouraging to say, but nothing presented itself in his mind. "I wish I had something else to tell you, Lily," he said finally, for lack of anything else, and just to break the awful silence that seemed so expectant between them.
James noted the piece of parchment even as Lily spotted it and he tried to intercept it, but she had it in her hand before he could and it seemed rude to take it from her, "It was a note for Sirius, love - he's been here and is gone right now to check on a few of our friends."
Silently, he cursed the owl that presented itself a moment later. "Hon," he said softly, "There isn't anything you should be doing right now - why don't you give me the note?" He had been privy to some fairly confidential things in his day and was a fully trusted person in the eyes of the Ministry, after all.
Lily sighed and knew that James was right. She had to not think about work, she wouldn't be working there anymore anyway, Without question, she gave the note to James. But something that James said made her think, "Sirius was here when Dumbledore left. Did he leave and come back?" She asked, furrowing her brow, "I suppose it really doesn't matter. There's so much to do before we go into hiding. I wonder how long it will be before we have to worry about people knowing that we're going to have a baby?"
She thought about Christmas, only a week away. This should be a happy time for them, their firstborn child was on the way. But instead they would be having a funeral for her folks and basically disappearing from everything and everyone they knew and loved.
"James, I'll have to call Petunia tomorrow. I don't want some stranger telling her that our parents are dead. And we'll have to make arrangements for them," Putting her fingers up to her eyes, Lily rubbed them in an attempt to clear her head, "I always knew that I'd one day be burying my parents, I just never expected it to be this soon. Why did they do it? My parents never did anything to them. They did it to hurt me, to hurt us, didn't they?"
Taking the note from his wife, James frowned and slipped it into his pocket. Whatever it was could likely wait a short bit, anyway. Not much mattered to him in this moment besides the concern that he had for her and their child. Everything else, he loathed to admit it to himself, was now secondary. Besides, it wasn't as though he could be out in plain view anymore, either. They'd just become prisoners of their own destinies, whatever that may be.
"Sirius will be back - I asked him to stay with us a short while - until we get everything set up, hon. No worries." Smoothing down her hair, he regarded her with an unusual softness, as though she was a china doll. He knew in his mind that she was no where near fragile, but he didn't want to push testing her limitations at the moment.
"Lily, it is likely that the Ministry has already had people working with the local poli?... polici?... police?" He gave her an apologetic look, knowing he was more used to foreign countries name for it than for England, "The Ministry has probably already covered the incident for the local authorities. You can't just go killing people in Muggle neighborhoods and not have anyone notice, after all. I am sorry, Lils," he said, holding her hands, "But Petunia probably already has been told." He knew that wouldn't sit well, but there was nothing for it. "Now is not the time to worry about these things - it'll be taken care of in the morning, love. You need to rest."
He leaned in and softened further still, "But yes - they did it to get to us." He knew the strategy well - it had played out in his family years before, and now it was playing out in hers. If you can't get to the person directly - destroy everything they know and love around them.
Tears filled her eyes; their rebellion against the dark side had cost her parents their lives, as it had his parents' lives years before. She thought about her sister, who hated her and James so much that she was loath to allow them to protect her family. She had to make her sister understand somehow, and she also had to get James to help her convince them. Taking his hand in hers, she allowed herself to draw strength from him. Strength for herself so that her body could keep their child safe.
Just then there was the sound of a car driving up their driveway outside and Lily looked at James, "Well, we know who that is. Not too many people we know drive cars, do they?" She said, grimly. She had almost been expecting this, that as soon as Petunia and Vernon heard the news that they would be over here.
Her suspicions were confirmed a moment later when heavy footsteps appeared on their doorstep, followed by a heavy pounding on the door, "POTTER! You open this door right now or I'll bloody well break it down!" Vernon's voice could be heard throughout the house and sent the house elves scattering.
James let Lily have all the strength that he possessed - which wasn't too terribly much as it was, he was sorry to think. He was just about at the edge himself, was angry, upset, tired, and weary. Yet, none of that showed because that is how important it was right now just to hold it back and to hold it together. But it was wearing thin, and Sirius had tasted that just before he had left and he had to apologize for it.
But, just as the sound of the tires could be heard, James was standing and he put an arm out for Lily to just remain where she was. Something in him was braced for this but there was this other part that honestly had no interest in holding back any longer.
It was his name being called out, his ancestral pride, and all of it bubbled to the surface. He was in no mood to deal with this right now. He could see the look in Lily's eyes instantly change to alarm but there was nothing left in him to belay it. "Stay. Right. Here." he commanded, giving her that look that said she best think twice before doing anything else. With that, he crossed quickly to the door and before that brother-in-law could get a decent accusation out, James had laid him quite flat to the porch.
Vernon had told Petunia to stay in the car, but as she watched the events unfold and saw James hit Vernon with a right cross, she knew that she couldn't sit idly by and do nothing. Getting out of the car, she walked calmly up to the door, still in a state of shock that her parents were dead, "James, please," She said quietly, looking at him with fear in her eyes, "I must talk to Lily. I promise, I won't do anything to upset her or anything. But our parents are dead and we have to make plans," Petunia's horselike face was sincerely concerned and showed no sign of deception.
Lily heard her sister's voice and knew that she wanted to see her. She looked at James, who seemed to be wanting her input, and nodded, mouthing the words, Please let her in. For now they had to put aside their differences and act like a family. She and James would be going into hiding very soon and who knew what could happen?
Holding no venomosity for Petunia in particular, James held himself at bay when Petunia ran up, "You can talk to Lily. But you best not accuse her of anything - any part of this - or you will have to answer to me." His eyes held full warning that he had every intention of carrying out that threat if need be, although he'd certainly never hit her under any circumstances. Still, he didn't need, and Lily didn't need, some kind of obnoxious, ignorant muggle making out that this whole situation was somehow that they had been the cause of all these things happening, directly or indirectly.
He waved Petunia past the fat man laying out on their porch, knowing he'd done no permanent damage to the man, and he withdrew his wand - casting a charm that would lift the man onto the foyer floor at least so that he could close the door. He was willing to let his sister-in-law in but he wasn't going to stand for an belligerence in his home. Not from anyone. And no one could make threats like that to him.
Lily rose to greet her sister, embracing her in a hug. She could see that Petunia had been crying, and her heart went out to her. Gesturing to the couch, she invited her sister to sit down. Putting her hand over Petunia's, Lily looked in her eyes, "Petunia, I'm so sorry about Mum and Dad. Some of the people in our world, they just don't care who they hurt or how they do it. You know James and I would never do anything to hurt them ourselves."
"I know, Lily. I told Vernon that rushing over here and making accusations wasn't going to do anyone any good, but you know how stubborn he can be. I know that you and James had nothing to do with this," Petunia sighed heavily and looked at her husband laying on the floor, "Will he be alright?"
James kept a wary eye on the two sisters, making sure that nothing untoward was going to go on. He didn't figure it would, but the moments of civility between the two of them were rare enough. Still, tragedy tended to band some people together - if only temporarily. He rather hoped it would be a bridge between them buy an underlying cynicism whispered to him that it would be short-lived. He knew Petunia to be a bitter person and as soon as Lily's parents were finally laid to rest, he fully expected those accusations to surface in her, no matter what she was saying now.
He nodded to Lily if only to reassure her that his anger, for the time being, was tempered back to an even keel. When Petunia looked in his direction, he could see the fear in her eyes, "He'll be fine. And if he isn't fine - then I am a healer, right?" he answered her, perhaps a little colder than he would otherwise.
Petunia relaxed a bit then, knowing that Vernon would be alright, "I apologize for my husband. He can be rather, brash, at times, as you well know. I guess with the baby on the way he's more on edge than usual," She said, a half smile on her face, "Pity Mum and Dad won't get to see their first grandchild," She said, choking a bit on the words.
"I know, Petunia," Lily said patting her hand and thinking I know too well what that is like , "But at least they died happy, knowing that they were going to be grandparents. Would you like a glass of milk or something, Petunia? We have something called butterbeer, rather tasty and no alcohol so it's safe to drink," Petunia nodded and Lily summoned a bottle of butterbeer with two glasses, knowing that James would probably want something stronger. She opened the bottle and poured out a glass for her and Petunia.
Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Vernon stirring on the floor. Vernon had been slowly waking up and had heard everything that Lily had said last. Getting up from the floor, he turned to Lily, a look of menace upon his face, "Died happy? Is that what you think happened? Well they told me the state that they were in was atrocious..." He didn't get any more words out after that before James stepped in.
Allowing the two sisters to talk, James took it upon himself to play sentry to the scenario. Lily had been his pillar of strength when there was nothing left of his family, and he was most definitely going to be there for her now. He swallowed hard, knowing that it was difficult for his wife to speak about her parents being grandparents without her saying that she was also expecting. In some way, he knew she was accepting that perhaps her parents also knew about their child, in the afterlife perhaps, or she could act as though they did. A small comfort, but it was something. And because he was conveying respect for Lily, and her alone, he allowed Vernon to return to consciousness and to begin to pick himself up.
However, he almost instantly regretted that choice as soon as the git opened his mouth. Withdrawing his wand, he froze Vernon where he stood, mid-sentence, deciding quickly just to leave him that way and he stepped around him and walked quickly to the two sisters. He could see the question on both their faces immediately and he sighed deeply to himself. Sitting upon the coffee table beside them, he nodded and said nothing.
Lily knew by the look on James' face that he knew exactly what Vernon had been about to say, that Sirius probably had lied to her about her parents' death wanting to protect her. Judging by the surprised look on Petunia's face, she didn't know the truth, either. She decided to say nothing more about it but intended to ask James about it later.
Taking Petunia's hands in hers, a pleading look on her face, she said, "Petunia, please allow James and I to put some spells of protection on your house. I am imploring you one last time because this is the last time you will see James and I for a while. I can't tell you where we are going or why, but we will be moving soon after the funeral for our parents. Please...if not for your sake but for the sake of the baby you are carrying," She looked to James for help, "When is your child due, by the way?" She saw that Petunia's pregnancy was already evident and wanted to gauge how long they had before she got to that stage.
"The baby's due in June," Petunia said plainly, looking from Lily to James, to her motionless husband, then back to Lily. An inward battle appeared to be raging inside of her and Lily knew that she was really considering the decision to allow them to protect her family.
Running through his options in his mind, James fiddled with his wand just a bit. He was going to have to alter the memories of Vernon before he 'unfroze' him, he figured - it was just difficult to decide whether to alter him just a bit or make him a blithering idiot. Then again, he was already a blithering idiot, he could just make him a mute blithering idiot.
Snapped out of this internal dialog, James met Lily's pleading eyes and he softened for her benefit and a bit for Petunia, who was clearly not in the know about a lot of things. It was unlikely that Vernon had actually seen the scene but had been conveyed it by the local authorities. Well, some other things needed to be altered, he was sure.
Nevertheless, that was a job for later - and he'd appeal to the Ministry to handle that. James could tell what Lily was thinking - they didn't have too much time, either. Looking at Petunia directly for the first time, he made an appeal on Lily's behalf, "There are no guarantees, no matter what. You're in this, we're all in this - you can do everything or you can do nothing - but you're not immune. And it's better to be prepared for it than not to be. You can't walk away and expect you'll never be affected by it, Petunia."
Petunia sighed. She knew that her sister and brother in law were right, as much as she was loath to admit it. She looked at her husband, frozen in time and knew that he wasn't going to like what she was about to say, but she had their baby to think about. If he was going to be so pigheaded as to put their child at risk, then she would have to do it when he couldn't do anything about it, "James, Lily, I have come to a decision. Vernon won't like it but at this point I don't care. Knowing what happened to Mum and Dad has made me realize that there is real danger involved and that we have to protect our child. Please, do what you can to protect us."
Lily found tears pricking her eyes, that was happening a lot today, and reached over to give her sister a hug, "You've made the right decision, Petunia," In her mind she knew that her parents had been killed because of the Death Eater's hatred for her and James and knew that Petunia and Vernon were just as much at risk as they had been.
She looked at the clock and saw that the time was getting late. It was dangerous for either James or her to go outside at any time, but especially at night. Looking at Petunia, she saw how tired she was and her own resources were wearing thin, "I think the best thing to do would be to go and place the charms of protection on your house tomorrow, while Vernon is at work. That way he won't be any the wiser. I know that he will be upset if he finds out."
"He won't find out," James said plaintively as both sisters came to terms and Petunia finally saw some reason to what they were saying. Her sister was stubborn as a mule at times, but there was some glimmer of logic from time to time behind those eyes. When she could push away the clouds of her own prejudices, that was. "Lily, honey - why don't you take Petunia to the kitchen for a minute, okay?" He gave her a slight look and an ever so subtle nod - that she ought to be able to pick up by now seeing as they'd been together for a few years - that indicated he needed to do something with Vernon.
He needed to be made 'none the wiser' to some of this and the alteration could be... delicate. Reflexively, he stood and bent over to give Petunia a slight hug - a rare and tender gesture toward her - just to show Lily that he wasn't uncaring in their general direction. He just... had a difficult time toward some muggles and these two were not the easiest to be related to... albeit by marriage alone.
"Okay, James," She said, smiling at him and thanking him for being so kind to Petunia. She knew that it wasn't easy for him and it wasn't easy for her either. Standing up, she offered Petunia her hand and led her into the kitchen, hoping that the house elves wouldn't be there. Thankfully, they seemed to have scattered when they knew that there were Muggles in the house, "Do you know what you are going to have, Petunia?" She said, getting out some cookies and offering her some.
"No, not yet, it's still too early to tell," Petunia said, looking towards the kitchen door which Lily had closed, "I think Mum and Dad always thought you and James would have a child first. I don't think they figured me and Vernon to be the type who wanted children, but they knew how much you and James loved them."
Lily could see that Petunia was wondering what James was doing, "Don't worry, Petunia, he's just...um, making sure that Vernon is okay. He is a healer after all," When Petunia mentioned about her and James having a child she gasped a bit and instinctively put her hand to where their son was growing. When Petunia gave her a strange look, she shrugged and forced a smile, "Cramps. Yes, James and I do love children. We're just waiting on the right time."
Allowing Lily the time to get Petunia into the kitchen and behind the closed door before he even made a move in Vernon's general direction. He stroked his chin, realizing he was getting a bit of an afternoon shadow on it, and considered the string of spells he ought to perform. Something completely mind altering came into his thoughts, but he pushed it away stubbornly. As much as he wanted to, he knew he only had the right to protect his own interests, as if that wasn't tampering enough, and no more. Shame to waste the opportunity, however. Nevertheless, he performed a short ritual and then led Vernon to the couch. He still appeared stunned and was mostly docile but he knew that would wear off soon enough. After Petunia got him home, most likely, and he'd had a bit of rest.
Then he'd be his own ornery, stubborn, pig-headed self again. Damn it. Whistling and walking back to the kitchen, he remembered that he ought not be so happy and he stopped before opening the kitchen door. Catching the look of the two sisters as soon as he stepped through the doorway, he shrugged and addressed Petunia first, "He'll be fine. Take him home and put him to bed. He'll be his normal self in the morning." Walking over to Lily, he put an arm around her waist, subtly tugging up her arm so it wasn't over her abdomen so obviously. It was a normal reaction, he knew, but one she'd have to curb in questionable company, "You okay?"
"Yes, I was just telling Petunia about the horrible cramps I was having," She said, giving him a pointed look that told him that she was keeping their secret safe and explaining her actions, "We had been talking about how our parents had expected us to be the ones to have a baby first, that's all."
Turning to Petunia, she gave her sister another hug, "I know that wherever Mum and Dad are they will be watching over your son or daughter and rejoice in their own way when he or she makes their entrance into the world. You should go home and get some rest yourself, it's not good for the baby. I'll call you tomorrow and we'll make plans for a quiet service for them," She said, sadly, "And also for what we talked about earlier," Lily lead Petunia out of the kitchen and back to the living room where Vernon appeared to be awake but quiet.
"Thank you, Lily and James, for everything," Petunia said, gesturing for Vernon to get up and leading him out to the car. Lily went to the window and made sure they got into the car okay, hoping and praying that they would be alright. When they finally drove out of sight, she sat down on the couch and patted the cushion next to her, wanting James to join her, "Well, that was a nine day's wonder all in itself wasn't it? We'll never convince Vernon, but at least Petunia is now listening to reason."
Stroking Lily's hair mildly, he leaned in and kissed her on the cheek, "Yes, I'll have to make you something for that." He nodded at her explanation and helped escort her sister down the hallway, momentarily admiring his handiwork with Vernon - just how he liked him, silent and docile. Now, his memory only withheld the highlights of the recent events, most likely, and very little detail. Also, he spelled Vernon not to notice certain things around his house - setting up things for later. "Drive carefully," he said with forced concern as they left, having heard the phrase somewhere and grateful he had a chance to use it finally. He knew he was going to have to learn to be more... muggle-ish... himself. No matter how much the thought made him cringe.
As soon as they were gone, he walked over to the couch with Lily and sat next to her, running an arm along the back of the couch, letting her lean in if she wanted to, "Her reasoning will wear off most likely when the shock does..." He didn't mean to sound cynical or mean - he just felt it was a statement of reality, all in all.
"I'm afraid you're right," She said, sighing, "But at least by then, the house will have the protection charms on it. Merlin, did you see how big she is already and she's only a month further along than I am. James, we don't have a lot of time do we?" She said, thinking about all that needed to be done before they could go into hiding.
She nestled up next to James, bringing her feet up next to her on the couch, "You did some good work with Vernon tonight. I would have been more comfortable going and doing the protection spells tonight so that I knew that they were safe, but I know that nighttime isn't the safest time for us to be out and about."
Remembering what Vernon had said, she looked at James with a no nonsense look upon her face, "James, Sirius wasn't telling the truth, was he? There was something that he didn't tell me about Mum and Dad's death, I know there was..."
Taking Lily into his arms, it was good to have her against him, the warm of her seeping in and chasing the cold that he was feeling inside away. "Not much time, love. You don't worry, though. I have a ton of people who owe me or my father a favor and it'll all be taken care of. Tomorrow, we see to your parents and your sister. That is all you need to think on." He smiled softly to himself then, "Other than yourself, us and our child, that is." His family. If he lived long enough to actually have one. He hid the worry, however - making it small in his mind. "As for Vernon - well, I restrained myself from my wilder ideas, but he won't remember the finer details." He loathed the question he knew was coming, however.
Subconsciously, he began to rub Lily's shoulder, "Sirius didn't say the whole thing, but..." he stopped for a moment, his mouth taking on a momentary grim line, "It was only because he didn't want you to suffer, too."