Thanks to Eyes of sky for letting me know it gets confusing in the middle. Just so everyone knows, it's Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot, Prongs and Lily.
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Not so boring after all…
Hey, Padfoot, wanna pass notes?
Don't have much choice do I?
Not if you want to see tomorrow.
Its double potions then. I don't want to see tomorrow. Good bye.
Bad luck, Prongs.
Oh, shut up.
If I shut up then you will have nobody to pass notes with.
Not neccessesarily. Hey, Wormtail.
Hello.
Would you like to play a prank on our dear friend Snape?
I'd love to.
Thought you weren't joining in?
I changed my mind. How about we ask Lily to marry Prongs again? That always gets a good laugh.
Not from me.
I'm afraid that you are very much in the minority here.
Why don't we ask Snape to marry Padfoot?
Nice.
NO FG WAY!
Watch your language!
Yes, there are ladies about you know.
I-erm-I-er-you-
What?
That means he would like to marry you.
More like love to marry you.
Oh.
Erm-er-uh-um-hello.
Hi.
EXCUSE ME?
Bit slow today, aren't you Prongs?
WHA-?
Read what we've been writing while you've been oogling a certain redhead in close proximity to you.
1st HEY! 2nd I have NOT been oogling her 3rd I thought long words and sentences that could be said in a matter of seconds but take hours were Moony's area ?
Good point. 1st HEY! 2nd Yes you have-
I knew it!
3rd Stop trying to be me, Wormtail.
Sorry.
That's better.
How the heck did you get him so well trained?
I have my methods. Which, before you ask, I won't tell you until the marauders fail at a prank i.e NEVER!
Bloody hell, you two are like an old married couple!
Are we that obvious?
Yes, you are.
Mind you, if they are both old and married then the poor things mustn't have a very good sex life…
Oh, yes, it's the shambles. Care to make it better?
Umm, Padfoot, you do realise you just got ripped by a GIRL don't you?
Like hell.
You did.
Yeah, right.
Yeah, right, actually.
Sirius Black does not get "ripped" by girls.
Sirius Black does get "ripped" by girls now. I hate to burst your bubble. Actually, come to think of it, no I don't.
Nice one!
Thanks.
Hey, lets think of stories to make little Jamie blush.
One: lets not. 2: DON'T, under any circumstances, call me Jamie.
Sorry.
Sorry.
Sorry.
Padfoot?
What?
Apologise.
What for?
You know "what for".
Oh, you mean calling you Jamie, Jamie?
Quit it.
OK, sorry.
That's better.
Jamie.
Hey!
Um, I don't mean to butt in, but weren't we going to make Prongs blush?
Can I help?
I think you might be the one person who can make him go beetroot.
I'll take that as a compliment.
Good job too, or Wormtail wouldn't be alive right now.
I think I'll take that as a compliment as well.
You are the luckiest person alive you know. Getting so many people saying how vicious you are…
Why thank you. I'm touched.
Hopefully by the people that prevent murders.
You know Padfoot, you should make the change permanent.
Speaking of murders, yours will be witnessed shortly.
I've probably missed something here. What do you mean by "change"?
Oh, that, just nothing.
James Potter you are a very bad liar. And stop looking at Git Head to get you out of trouble!
Hey, who're you calling "Git Head"?
You, actually.
We have this little joke that Sirius is just like a dog. You know, lazy, loves playing games, hurts you if you try and wake him up, that sort of thing.
You forgot always acts like a complete –
I think we've heard enough of this now.
I don't. This is starting to get good. The marauders divided.
I've had an idea.
Oh, no.
Take cover!
Run for your lives!
Just hear me out. What do you say to a party?
When, where, why, who, how and your point please.
Tonight, Room of Requirement, no reason, anyone who wants to and isn't a Slytherin, we're the marauders so we'll find a way and my point is WHY THE HELL NOT? Does that answer your questions?
Uh huh.
Are we going into Hogsmeade then?
You bet.
How? Next Hogsmeade weekend isn't till 13th January.
So?
This is October 20th.
We have our ways.
We are the marauders, remember.
Yes, but-
No buts. Pass it round. All who want to can come. Except Slytherins.
What will they do?
I've prepared a special little party all for themselves.
Uh oh…
There's gonna be trouble…
Big time.
After hanging round with you lot for less then an hour I can tell that when I leave school I'm going to need serious therapy.
So it involves me then, does it? Sirius therapy?
Don't get your hopes up.
Um, does anyone happen to know where James is..?
I think he's gone.
Yeah I know where he is. He is not here. He has gone.
Duh.
Talk about stating the obvious.
He does have a point though…
SHUT UP!
OK.
Hey, Wormtail's supposed to be my lap dog.
What have I missed?
Nothing much, we were just hoping you would never return from your little quest and imagining what the world would be like with no Jamie Potter.
Pretty boring, huh?
No, actually it was quiet.
Ha, ha, very funny.
So where did you go?
Bathrooms.
Oh, I thought it was something good.
What do you mean "bathrooms"? That's a plural.
Very clever.
You mean you had to go to the loo more than once?
No, dummy, I was posting a message in all the bathrooms.
ALL the bathrooms?
Yep.
Even the girl's?
Even the girl's.
Bloody hell. It looks like nowhere is safe anymore, not even the bogs!
What message did you put?
Oh, nothing really, just an advert…
You went in all the toilets just to post an advert?
It's not just any old advert.
What is it then, eh? Asking for second-hand haemorrhoid cream again?
Eeew!
I second that.
Me too.
Me three, four, five and six! It was the greatest advert anyone's ever posted!
…
…
…
Well, go on then.
…
What did it say?
"New Slytherin urgently needed. Must be prettier than Severus Snape, have clean hair, normal skin, a decent nose; must not be gay and must NOT wear pink lacy thongs. We need somebody to replace Severus Snape as he is too ugly, and doesn't wash his pink lacy underwear, causing the common room to smell horrific. And he keeps trying to hit on the other males. The only one not objecting is one Mr Lucius Malfoy, who seems quite reluctant to lose Snape as he know has nobody to ask out on dates."
Two birds with one stone. I like it.
I must say, even by your usual standards, that was impressive.
Lunch.
What?
Lunch. Let's eat.
It's probably just me, but what is he on about?
Don't ask me.
You lot do realise that History of Magic ended 20 minutes ago and we've been writing this all the way here without knowing?
No.
Well, we did. So let's eat.
And then we'll get going to Hogsmeade.
Yeah, you three can spread the word about the party by yourselves, can't you?
Sure.
Um, Peter…?
Yes?
Never mind.
OK.
Remus, I'd have thought you of all people would have realised we were walking to lunch and still writing on some scrap parchment.
Lily, I'd have thought you of all people would have realised we are sitting next to each other in the Great Hall, eating lunch and having people staring at us because we ARE STILL WRITING ON A PIECE OF SCRAP PARCHMENT!
Ooops.