Author's Note: Sorry, it's small and late. Work is evil, school is cruel, and plot bunnies are coming in the forms of gypsies and musicals. Please don't ask. And DPM, Rin is still a younger child. I'm placing this all sometime during the manga, and anime. I want to say Rin's been with Sesshoumaru for a year or two. R/R
Chapter Three: Eglantine
Rin sat in the gardens watching the Forest, waiting for Sesshoumaru. Kannon stood in her feminine form several feet behind the girl watching her watch the darkness. She had tried calling to the human many times but the girl did not respond. Kannon's heart would have twisted had she possessed one. It would have been better if the girl ignored her, but Rin had closed her heart to Kannon.
She would no longer hear the Goddess' whispered promises of love and security. Rin was refusing Kannon, and thus refusing Compassion. It would not be long before…
There was a hissed laughter behind Kannon that made her swing about. From the corners of the gardens bordering the forests, dark shadow-forms gathered, waiting. Kannon crossed to them, raising her hand in warning.
"Your kind cannot pass here." She spoke to the ink.
The shadow laughed at her, and reformed into a human shape as it faced her. It took on a male voice, quiet and respectful. It made a motion like bowing before hissing, "No, Kannon Lord?" The ink shifted as if it had taken a step forward and pressed clearly into Kannon's gardens. The Goddess recoiled slightly. On the second step, the ink was thrown back, and hissed angrily. "No." It agreed. "But soon." The shadow made a sweeping motion towards Rin. "This soul is familiar. It has belonged to my kind before."
"It was taken from you."
"Stolen." The Shadow returned darkly, before rising up. It turned its head from one side to another and Kannon thought she saw someone she knew long ago in the shadow's guise. The darkness spread and scattered for a moment, surrounding Kannon for a moment, making her vision blur for a moment before it collected itself again and seemed to laugh. "But we, like you, great one, are patient. Those who have been touched by my kind are forever touched by it. We collect like rain under earth, ever present. She will return to us. She bears our mark."
Kannon turned just enough to capture Rin in her gaze. She could see shadows creeping about the girl's small frame, tickling the edges of Rin's presence, calling to her. Kannon reached out with her powers to call to the child, but again she was rebuffed. Rin shifted in her seat, and continued to look out towards to the forests.
"Lord Sesshoumaru." She spoke quietly to the woods, waiting.
Kannon felt the darkness shift and press closer. Kannon inhaled then, as she felt the weight of the shadow pressing against her. She felt very tired suddenly, longing to rest and for release. It took all of Kannon to repel the forces. When the Shadow spoke, it was assured, but not smug. It spoke as one who could mimic compassion but did not feel or understand the emotion. "He will not come for her."
The statement was a promise and a question.
"Not before it's too late." The Goddess returned.
"You did this." The shadow continued, darkly. "You did this but why?"
"We cannot disobey our natures."
"And if this child does, what does it matter to you? What do you care if a human girl live beyond the hells granted to her by your- and my- kind that touches the stars for a moment. What does it matter that she should wipe the mud from her face, should look up and touch something beyond what was given her? He would have given…"
"Sesshoumaru gives nothing free."
"Neither do you, All-Loving."
"I never made pretense to." Kannon said quietly. She crossed her arms over herself, as if chilled. "I give and take as easily as the sea. I am All Mother, and ravaged womb. I never…" She slid her eyes closed, allowing the chill and the weariness seep nearer to her. The shadow sidled up, and smiled beside her. "She would make the Taiyoukai a slave."
"Do you hate her for this?" The shadow asked. "Or because Sesshoumaru wouldn't bow to you?"
Kannon turned about staring into the shadow and piercing it with her majesty. The Shadow shrunk back. Darkness had no place before a God. Kannon spoke then, in a tongue that had passed from human mouths then, and has since entered memory. It was a Godtongue, an ancient language, as fearsome and beautiful as tempest, as terrible as a storm. "Hear me, whisper. I am, and as steadfast and lasting as thought and will. I was before creators first kneeled down to mould and make your kind. I was before the star that nurtures this stone spark and flared, and will continue such when it has blackened and winter comes to this small globe.
Sesshoumaru and his kind as are small to me as the Ningen seem to them. I do as I chose. He matters little. This," Kannon motioned for Rin. "creature means just as little."
"Then, why?" The shadow whispered. "Why, tell me…"
"It is my will."
"Compassion is cold."
"It is the nature of such things. Emotion means nothing without action. Kindness without comfort is as cruel a mistress as apathy and before I am done, they will all know it."
"There is one thing crueler…" The Shadow purred.
"Oh?"
"Memory." The Shadow supplied, stepping closer into the garden. Kannon was powerless to block its path. The Shadow kneeled down and reached a paw out to graze Rin's cheek. The child inclined to the touch. "Tell me, Goddess. Is it better to have perish by wolves, or to have been rescued, tended to, loved…and abandoned?"
He heard her screaming from miles away. He wasn't even sure if it was truly her voice he heard, or something deep within his soul that was mindful of her always. He could feel the pain in her voice; the fear and panic that caused her voice to strain and carry farther then it should have been able coming from such a small vessel.
He turned and ran, not thinking or questioning the actions. The reaction to her call came as natural to him as pulling Tokijin for battle, or calling upon his light whip to dispatch lesser demons. It was as unquestioned and natural as he being Lord of the Western Lands, as he being called Youkai.
She called, Sesshoumaru came.
This was the way of things.
Sesshoumaru transformed into a stage of pure Yoki because it was faster and needed to catch her as she fell. But he did not catch her, he enveloped her, consumed her, shielded her with the most basic parts of who he was.
And he returned to human form, she was in his arm, cradled against his chest. She had fainted from the fall, and he studied her small round face for a long time, barely paying attention to the weed she clutched in her small hands like life itself. He found himself wondering idly what could have possessed the child to traverse the perilous mountain for some herb.
Jaken's doing perhaps. He would kill the Imp.
He quelled the anger that was rising within him with the knowledge that she was safe and his mission was more or less fulfilled. The Poison Wasps had fled, or died. Naraku was gone. He'd find another way.
She was safe.
They could continue on.
Sesshoumaru inhaled and flinched, pausing for a moment. Jaken who had not realized his Master hesitation continued walking, and marched straight into Sesshoumaru's pant leg. Sesshoumaru did not think to notice, he was looking around, staring at the landscape intensely, brow furrowing in thought.
"My Lord?" Jaken croaked, leaning upon the staff and watching his Master intently. "Something the matter?"
"We've been here before." Sesshoumaru said softly.
"Yes milord, many times. Not far from here is the Hanyou Jinenji with his garden of herbs that…" Jaken trailed off, frowning. "That…"
"Have we done business with the Half-Breed?"
"I do no recall."
"She was endangered here." The Western Lord whispered, turning a half circle and staring towards the mountains.
He could almost see her, the girl from the memory that had teased his conscience and fled form him. He had seen her before, had known her, felt her skin upon his arm and heard the tones of her voice by heart. He knew this girl, this shadow-child of dreams and reveries but every time she came to him, and he reached forward to recapture her she faded away.
…like a dream.
She was somewhere, he knew.
Waiting.
For him.
"My lord?"
Sesshoumaru turned to Jaken before continuing on his path to where he followed Tama's scent. "It's of no concern," he told his servant. "a dream."
"Even dreams should be remembered."
Sesshoumaru turned, watching Jaken both impressed and surprised that his retainer had spoken to correct his Master. He held the Imp in his gaze for a long time, waiting for the creature to flinch.
Jaken held fast. Sesshoumaru faltered first, returning to his path. He did not wait for Jaken to follow. He was too busy trying not to remember the girl of his dreams.
No good could come of it.