Dominance
"I
still don't understand why. Why her? I never thought she'd go
this far. Of all the people we see everyday, I never thought I could
care so much about the outcome. Everyday. They come in, we try to
help them. Maybe we save them, maybe we don't. We make the choice
of life and death everyday. And everytime someone dies I wonder what
we could've done more. But I've never blamed myself."
"Jake,
you shouldn't blame yourself. This wasn't your fault."
"That's
where you're wrong, Susan. You may blame Carter for cheating on her
and leaving her and trying to fix her and maybe even ruining her. But
he loved her. We both know that. You may blame yourself for not
chasing her to wherever she ran away to. Not trying hard enough. You
may blame Sam for paging you back to the ER when, maybe if you hadn't
left, you would've realized she wasn't there and went to go find
her. Maybe then I wouldn't have found out. But I blame myself. I
wasn't there for her. I didn't make sure she was ok. I didn't
care about her past, only her future. I just made myself believe she
was a new package, but she's not. She was damaged goods and I acted
like she was perfect. She needed more than I gave her."
"You
gave her all you could, Jake. You did a great job. Don't blame
yourself. You're the best thing that ever happened to her."
"What
are you guys talking about?"
"Oh hey sweetie! I didn't know
you were up. How are you feeling?"
"I'm fine, Jake." Abby
said with a giggle and a smile. "You know, guys, I never did really
get to thank you."
"For what?"
"I know it was 3 weeks
ago, but I never really thanked you for all you did for me.
Everything. Looking for me, talking to me, helping me, saving me. I
owe you guys so much."
"Don't expect any less. You mean the
world to me, Abby."
Susan sensed her presence was no longer
necessary and slipped out of the hallway outside of Abby's hospital
room to leave Jake and Abby alone. The couple shared a sweet glance
then, hands clasped, walked slowly to the ER for a friendly surprise
visit.
The instant the two walked into the elevator lobby, Jake saw Carter happily having a discussion with Susan. He suspected they were talking about Abby. Everyone was. Then as if in slow motion, Carter turned around and his smile dropped into a growl. Jake saw Carter's fiery eyes glaring directly into his own. Before Carter could get three steps closer to the couple, Jake asked Abby to get them some cokes. Abby joyfully accepted, seeing as she hadn't had anything stronger than water in 3 weeks.
She turned around
to head back to Jake, 2 cokes in hand, and saw what she thought was
just an illusion. She rubbed her eyes, but it didn't go away.
Carter and Jake were in a fist fight. Carter threw a punch across
Jake's cheek bone which sent Abby running over to be the hero. They
didn't notice her presence.
"Guys! What are you doing?"
Carter
and Jake threw verbal attacks back and forth.
"You could've
killed her! How could you do that to her?"
"I didn't do
anything to her! You're the one who left her!"
"You're
right, I shouldn't have! I should've kept her so she didn't end
up with you."
Abby realized they were fighting about her.
"Stop
it! Just stop it!"
No one heard her or they just didn't choose
to acknowledge her. Abby stood partially behind Jake when Carter
threw a punch and Jake ducked, making Carter clear knock Abby in the
face. She fell down in pain, clenching onto her face with all her
strength. The fought broke up and the two enemies rushed down to take
care of Abby. Now it was a competition of who loved her more, who
could take better care of her.
Susan ran over to Abby with a
gurney and after they helped get her on it, both men started
following her into the room.
"No. I don't want to be around
you. Either of you."
Soon after the incident, Abby's films came back. But when Susan went in to go over them with her, she only found an empty bed. Abby had walked home alone.
The walk seemed longer in the dark, face throbbing, and eye sight blurred because only one eye would open. She turned a corner and got a weird feeling that someone was following her. She turned around and saw no one. She started walking faster. Now she heard the hurried foot steps gaining on her. She led off into a sprint to her apartment, opened the door, slammed it, ran upstairs, opened her door, slammed, locked, bolted, and chained it. She turned on every light as she made her way through the small rooms. On the counter, she spotted an un-open bottle of wine. Abby grabbed it and a nearby phone and ran into the bathroom, closing and locking the door after she had entered. She sat down on the side of the bath tub and turned on the water. Then she walked over to the toilet, sat down on the lid, and sipped then sobbed then sipped then sobbed. After the bottle was empty, she dug her face into her hands and cried and cried. She looked up at the phone that was resting on the sink. Taking it into her hand, she contemplated calling Jake. The phone went back onto the counter and her eyes went back into her hands. Night turned to day and Abby hadn't slept at all. Tears glued to her face and her eyes completely bloodshot, Abby turned off the bath tub and went back out into the living room. She slipped into a new pair of pants and tied her shoes. Peering through the peep hole just to make sure no one was there waiting for her door to open, she finally decided it was safe and started on her way to work still wearing a tear-splotched face and the same shirt from the day before.
