Been gone…. But now I have FINALLY an update ready for you guys…. This probably is your New Years Gift… YAY!

We left off with Addison finding out about Meredith and Derek's rendezvous in the elevator (HOT HOT HOT!)

Addison was crushed. She knew Derek still loved her, but she thought that after their night in his trailer that he would consider taking her back 100. How could I be SO stupid!. Addison walked into the attending locker room to get changed. She didn't know where she would go after work. It's not like she could just SHOW up to the trailer and pretend it was all happy go lucky again. She could check into the Ramada down the road… easy access to the hospital, but far away from Derek's plot of land.

As she opened her locker, a box and a note fell out. Addison picked up the letter. It read:

Dear Addy,

It's me. Derek. I know it must've hurt you to find out… especially from gossip and not directly from me. I would be lying If I said I was going to tell you. (I am just trying to be honest with you, so please keep reading!). I was thinking, If you still wanted to talk about it, we could go to dinner tonight. There is a great restaurant by the water with a fantastic view. I saw the boards and we are both off completely tonight-so there's no worry we'll be called back to the hospital. Please come, we have to talk. Meet me in the lobby after you get off. I can't keep running, Addi.

Love,

Derek

Addison took in those last words. Love Love Love! He said love! There's a chance! Addison quickly got dressed. Before leaving the locker rooms, she checked her hair in the mirror. Perfect….almost. Since she wanted to hurry down to the lobby, she opted to take the stairs. She nearly dashed down the stairwell. It's like I am an intern all over again! At the bottom of the steps, she took a chance to take a breath and very coolly walked out the doors to find Derek in the chair, waiting for her.

"You look great, Addison," Derek said as he took her hand and hurried her out of the hospital. He didn't want Meredith to see them going somewhere together. He didn't want her to get the wrong impression. I guess I should've told her I was going to talk with Addison, but too late now. When they got to the car, he sighed. He snuck out, and Meredith didn't see them. He was safe.

Little did he know, Meredith saw it all. She was on the landing, and she wanted to go say hi to him. She thought he was waiting for her. He wasn't. Meredith rushed to her car to drive home.

"Hey Mer!" George yelled as he watched his lover cross past him into the kitchen. She was pissed! Izzie saw her too, and when she tried to talk to her, all Meredith did was turn around, give her a smug look, then turn back around. George and Izzie watched as she tore apart the kitchen, stuffing her face with any and every junk food product she could find. She was a mess-again! George and Izzie gave each other What-did-Mcdreamy-do-this-time looks as they saw her wallow in self-pity.

"We have to stop her, George," Izzie exclaimed. "She is going to stuff her face silly, possibly taking her little self down to Joe's, come back and throw up like there's no tomorrow! I thought she and Mcdreamy were fine, but maybe not! We have to sit her down and asks what's wrong!"

"Izzie, I want to know just as much as you what is wrong, but we have to be gentle. You know how sensitive she is about the HIM subject. Let's stay calm." They walked into the living room only to find a note on the couch in front of the tv she left running.

Dear Roomies,

For you INFORMATION! I saw Derek walking off with his WIFE back at the hospital! I'm off to Joe's and I'll be back whenever.

Bye,

The Loneliest heart who just realized the world is SCREWING HER!

"She sounds pissed," said George. Izzie gave him a quick glance. "Grab your coat George!" Izzie yelled as she grabbed the car keys. "We're going to Joe's!"

(------)

"So Addison.." Derek started. He didn't know what to tell her. She looked happy. She thought he was taking her back for good. He wasn't. He couldn't live without Meredith. He could however live without Addison and her upscale taste in homes. "I invited you here to tell you that I- I'm so sorry that I.."

"You don't have to tell me Derek," Addison interrupted. Derek was in shock. This might be easier than I thought Derek thought. "Listen Derek, I understand why you kissed Meredith. You had to. It was like a last hoo-rah!-type of thing. I understand! Now we can officially begin our life together-no strings attached." She obviously thought she had everything figured out. But she was so happy! Derek couldn't-but he had too-maybe not tonight-NO! Meredith will freak if I don't cut it off yet-but I CAN"T!

"...Addison…." Derek said, "I-I wanted to tell you that…." " Hi, I'm Anne and I'll be your waitress tonight. The specials are…"

And just like that he was cut off. He didn't tell her why she and him were REALLY out to dinner. He couldn't bear it. But how would he tell Mer. Oh how he loved Meredith. He didn't want her to feel abandoned-not again.

But Meredith was not feeling abandoned. George and Izzie met up with her at the bar and got her home. She was feeling sick to her stomach. In between vomiting, she cried, "WHY DID HE LEAVE ME AGAIN! AM I NOT GOOD ENOUGH!", and other variations of the phrase. George and Izzie tried to comfort her. They hugged her. They tried to bribe her with cake, but that only made her vomit even more. She was sick. Not just from the mixture of food and alcohol, but of the sickness of love. All the ups and downs and now this. The lowest of the low. How is hse going to deal with him tomorrow- let alone deal with the rest of her life?

It's LONG! Happy New Year!