Authors Notes: I have changed direction with this fic. I'm no longer telling it from Mimi's point of view which also means it's no longer in first person. I decided that I needed to broaden the scope for it go where I eventually wanted it go. I will go back and do rewrites on the previous chapters when I have some time. I hope you enjoy it, honest reviews are welcome and appreciated. I'm sorry it has taken me so long to update, thank you for your patience.

Disclaimer: I do not own these characters.

It was late morning and the sun was glaring harshly through the window when the pressure on Mimi's bladder finally woke her. She groaned softly in protest to being awake deciding to lay there and try to ignore it, albeit unsuccessfully. All she wanted to do was blink away the brightness and go back to sleep still feeling far too tired and miserable to get up. She couldn't help but think to herself that being run over by a bus would feel better than she felt now. She tried one more time to find a comfortable position and is yet again unsuccessful, finally she gives in and decides to get up. She discovers it's a struggle just to get out of bed, let alone to do so without waking Roger, who seems to be sleeping restlessly. She watches him for a moment noticing that his face is drawn, there are circles forming under his eyes and his hair has matted lightly on his forehead. Just looking at him causes a sudden rush of guilt to wash over her, making her to realize that he probably didn't sleep much last night. At the time she must have thought it a dream, but now knows that each time she stirred in the night she heard his voice softly shushing her back to sleep. She tries to replay the previous evening struggling to put a time table to it but everything after their fight is nothing but a blur. She had no idea what time he found her or when it was that she woke up sick, all she can figure is that it had to have been around four thirty when she ran out. She knows she shouldn't feel guilty, after all it was his fault that she got upset and left. But she also knows that she shouldn't have gotten so high. Now watching him sleep causes a little tug on her heart.

Shaking the thoughts from her head, Mimi slips out of bed only to find that her legs are shaky and wobble like rubber beneath her. Roger stirs slightly and she freezes, desperately trying not to wake him. Fighting for every step, somehow she manages to make her way out the door without waking him. Once in the hall what little strength she had fails and she has to lean against the wall for support. As she stumbles to the bathroom she can't help but think she hasn't felt this horrible in a long time. She also knows now that it was a bad idea to get out of bed, but she had no choice, besides it's too late now.

Mark had been sitting in the living room staring off into space when he heard Mimi in the hall. At first he thought he should go and check to make sure she that was alright but then thought better of it. He didn't want to impose on her and he felt that would be. It made him think back to when Roger was like this and his stomach turned. He hated to remember his best friend like that, it was even uglier in retrospect than he remembered it being when it was actually happening. In all the times he tried to help him, it usually turned into an ugly fight. Roger was too stubborn and by that point shut off from everyone, and Mark could see some of the same traits in Mimi. He wanted to help, instead he resigned himself to sit there focusing on a spot on the wall trying to push Mimi from his mind.

The bathroom tile is like ice on Mimi's bare feet and she shivers uncontrollably just touching it. It feels almost like shards of glass stinging her flesh and she has to fight not to cry out. She jumps more out of reflex than anything towards the rug in front of her and almost falls. Once the pressure on her bladder is relieved she splashes her face with warm water and tries to muster a non existent strength. Defeated by her own body, all she wants to do is go back to bed.

Mimi's stomach was still queasy and the journey to the bathroom had only made it worse causing her to have to sit on the side of the bath tub hoping that she wouldn't be sick again. After a long time of sitting there she's fairly certain nothing will come of the nausea so she tries to make her way slowly back towards the bedroom. Despite her best efforts she has to stop to rest, her body sinking to the floor with a soft thud. She sits there shaking and frustrated unable to believe how hard it is to go the 8 feet to the bathroom and back again. Her breath heavy in her chest and tears stinging her eyes, yet she can't will herself to move. She's never felt so helpless. Within seconds she hears footsteps in the hall.

"Mimi, are you ok?" it's Mark and he rushes towards her. He just couldn't continue to ignore the sounds in the hall. The thud was just too much for him.

She wipes her eyes quickly hoping he doesn't see the threatening tears "I'm fine, just resting a minute." her voice nearly failing her, she tries to get up but can't.

"Here. Let me help you." He reaches for her and she pushes his hand away.

"It's ok. I can do it, but thank you." she smiles weakly at him.

His eyes fix on hers "Are you sure?" she nods and tries once more to stand falling back down immediately. He reaches for her and she recoils, too stubborn to admit she needs help. "Well at least let me get Roger." He tries to insist.

"NO Mark!" her tone a far more harsh than had she intended causing him to frown like a scolded puppy.

"Is this over what he said yesterday? He didn't mean." Mimi cuts him off by touching his hand and shaking her head.

"No, it's not. Although in a way it should be. And he's not off the hook for that, I.." Her voice trails off "I just don't want to wake him. He looks like he didn't sleep much last night." her voice soft full of guilt and her eyes averting his "I think he needs."

"I think you need to worry about you and not Roger right now. He's stronger than you think, he's a survivor." he cuts her off reaching for her once again. She looks at him curiously sensing there is a whole lot he's not saying. Before she can ask he's speaking again."Let me help you. You can hardly move."

Mimi doesn't even have a chance to respond when they are interrupted "Mimi?" Rogers voice calls out her name and door to the bedroom quickly opens to show him looking a bit panicked and almost frightened.

"I'm right here." her voice a whisper "are you okay?"

Before she can even get the words out he's right there beside her. "When I woke up and you weren't there I thought you had left.." He catches himself mid thought. "I was just worried." His voice a little shaky causing her to look at him curiously, her eyes searching his. She starts to press him on his reaction, but Mark is shaking his head behind Roger giving her the idea that it's better not to ask.

"I was just coming back to bed." She starts to struggle to get to her feet but her legs give out like rubber beneath her.

"I gotcha" He catches her and scoops her up into his arms.

"Rog, I can walk, you don't have to carry me." Mimi protests, desperately grasping her independence. He looks at her unconvinced "really, I'm fine"

"Okay, if you're sure" he sets her down and her legs fold beneath her. "Whoa!" He barely catches her before she falls all the way to the floor. "I thought you." Mark sits watching silently.

"Alright you win!" Mimi's tone exasperated cutting him off "Is that what you.."

"Hey, relax. It's not about winning." His tone suddenly relaxed and playful as he smiles at her only increasing her frustration. "you're cute when you're annoyed." his voice full of laughter as he carries her back to the bedroom.

"Shut up." she pouts. "You're not funny."

"Who said anything about being trying to be funny?" he grins mischievously and jerks like he's going to drop her causing her to squeal.

"Roger!" Mimi clutches him as tightly as she can burying her face in his neck, knowing she doesn't have the strength to hold on if he decides to let go.

He laughs holding her tighter, enjoying her touch far more than he's willing to admit. He smiles at her and she scowls in response " I wasn't going to drop you, I was just teasing."

"Well it's NOT funny." her glare more intense than before, his face sobering instantly

"I'm sorry." he says softly

"Just put my down. I'm tired." her voice void of all emotion.

"Ahh don't be mad." His eyes wide still cradling her in his arms

"Roger, I'm not mad." she sighs audibly "I'm just worn out and I still feel terrible. Please just put me down."

"Alright" Finally relenting he sets her on the bed pulls the covers over her then starts to leave.

"Where are you going?" she watches him their eyes meeting "Aren't you coming back to bed."

"no I'm gonna…" His eyes dropping away from hers as he turns once again to go, but she's able to catch hold of his hand.

"Roger wait. I don't want you to go, I didn't mean.." She can't form a complete sentence, nothing is making sense. "Please, come back to bed."

"I'll be right back" He smiles and leaves.

Mimi laid there with her mind suddenly racing, trying to understand Roger, wondering why he left and if he's really coming back. Why did he seem so frightened when he woke and found her not there? Why is he so quick to push her away one minute only to hold on so tightly the next? What didn't Mark say in the hallway? The questions just wouldn't stop and her head was starting to spin. The nausea was coming back stronger than before, and the ceiling felt like it was closing in on her. She closes her eyes so tightly that they water slightly, tensing her body trying to make it stop. All Mimi could here was her heart pounding in her ears and it made her just want to scream. Suddenly she jumps, crying out involuntarily in response to someone touching her arm.

"Mimi, are you ok?" Rogers voice strong yet gentle. "Mimi?" his hand touches her cheek

She opens her eyes slowly focusing on his face, his eyes fixed on her. "Yeah I.. I…" her whole body shaking violently.

"You're dripping wet, I was only gone 5 minutes"

"It felt more like hours." she said meekly without ever realizing what she had said.

"What happened.?"

"I don't know, I just.." she swallowed hard trying to get rid of the cotton feeling in her mouth. "Suddenly I felt like the room was closing in on me and it was spinning." She struggles with the words "I couldn't breathe. I just.."

"shhhh." Rogers hushes her, crawling into bed wrapping her in his arms. "It's gonna ok. I've been there. It just needs to work it's way out of your system. You're gonna be ok." He was hoping she would get clean and was afraid to tell her how much worse it would get before it got better if she did.

Mimi curls up in the comfort of his arms, her body still shaking uncontrollably, yet feeling better just knowing she's not alone. "Where did you go?" She opens her eyes watching him intently.

His mouth curls into a tentative smile "I went to get you something to eat, but I guess you aren't up for it now."

"No, I'm not….. Sorry."

"It's ok, don't be. You probably wont be hungry for a while."

"Maybe." she whispers burying herself in his arms and closing her eyes again "Right now all I want to do is sleep." It wasn't long before she was sleeping.

Roger lay there for a long time content that Mimi was sleeping soundly. He hated to admit it even to himself, but this girl was getting to him and he wasn't sure what to make of it. There were moments when she reminded him so much of April that it hurt, that's when he was angry, distant, even cruel. Other times the two were so different that he wondered how even for an instant he could compare one to the other. In less than forty eight hours Mimi had not only managed to put a crack in the wall he'd built to protect himself, but also managed to scare the hell out of him. In the silence he closed his eyes and started to wonder if he should just walk away, but then when he looked at her. With her curls splayed wildly on the pillow, feeling her soft breath on his chest he didn't think he could. Suddenly he wanted nothing more than to finger the strings of his guitar now so far beyond his reach. If only things could be undone, changed, what he wouldn't give if only he could feel whole again. Instead tears stung his eyes though he tried to blink them back all the while watching the tragic beauty sleeping in his arms.

Mark sat on the couch looking lost, unsure of what to make of anything. His fingers wandering aimlessly over the knobs of his camera that was resting in his lap. It was like his security blanket, a comfort to just feel it's weight. He thought of his friends, the old ones and the new, he even thought of Joanne. He felt sorry for her in a way. Maureen was like a never ending soap opera drama, a twist and turn at any unexpected moment. Sometimes she was so outrageous he couldn't help but wonder if she was actually real or a made up character in ones imagination. He did know that she still made his heart ache though, and that was real enough. His eyes slowly drank in the apartment and he couldn't help but wonder how he wound up here, once again getting lost in his own thoughts. No wonder he hadn't heard Maureen come in. It wasn't until she plopped down practically in his lap that he was brought back from his thoughts.

"What are you doing? Get off me!" Mark was exasperated.

Maureen shifted and sat next to him her leg pressing against his, her face leaning towards his. When he looked at her she was staring at him wearing a pouty expression, with her eyes mastering the best of puppy dog looks. He knew she wanted something, and he could tell he wasn't going to like it.

"What ?" He shifted uncomfortably trying to gain a little personal space.

"Marky, baby?" Her voice oozed a thick sweetness that was too much for him to bear.

"Maureen stop! Just tell me what you want already?' he snapped

"You don't have to be mean Marky. You're never mean." she croaked

He sat watching her for a moment in silence waiting for the worst. Her eyes grew wide and suddenly looked like giant green pools ready to spill over at any moment.

"I'm sorry." he sighs "You obviously want something, what is it?"

"Well.." she hesitates causing Marks expression to quickly begin showing signs of annoyance again.

"Come on, out with it. You're not one to fumble especially when you want something" He forces a laugh.

"Well" she starts again. "It's Joanne. I know this is a lot to ask, but wont you talk to her for me. You know... Convince her that she doesn't want me to move out" she bats her eyelashes at him and he groans.

"You're kidding me right?" he can't even begin to hide his shock "Maureen that's too much even from you. I can't believe you would ask that. "He flops back in disbelief and looks away. Maureen sits there silently staring at the side of his face until he feels her eyes burning a virtual hole in him. Feeling the uncomfortable stare he looks back at her, "You really want me to do this?" Maureen nods "I can't, it's a bad idea. I don't know why you think me talking to her would do any good."

"Fine! Don't help me. After all we've been through, how can you be so heartless?" She doesn't wait for a response but stalks off and disappears down the hall.

Mark sat and debated if he should go after her or not. He really had no desire to talk to Joanne about not kicking her out, but he also wasn't sure he could tell Maureen no. She had this way of twisting him in knots and getting him to do things for her, simply because he adored her. She was famous for getting others to do her dirty work for her, especially Mark. He was wrapped around her little finger and she knew it, of course really anyone who knew either of them knew it as well. Finally resigned to yet another defeat by her he let out a groan and went after her, knowing he was going to regret this.

Mark's footsteps fell silently on the floor. He was hoping to not alert Maureen of his presence too soon, this way she wouldn't have time to think of something else to say to make him feel guilty.

Maureen had her back to the door and didn't hear Mark come in. He watched her for a minute while she was indiscriminately stuffing clothes in a suitcase still debating on what he was going to do. It was when she sank down and buried her face in her hands that he couldn't take anymore.

"Maureen?" His voice was tentative as he laid his hand on her shoulder

"Oh Marky." She sobbed "What am I supposed to do? Pookie's throwing me out. Don't you understand what she means to me?"

"Maybe she just needs a little time to cool off" He was calm and full of reason, part of the emotion spectrum that Maureen had never been able to master. "Do you even know why she asked you to leave?" he sat down beside her and looked her square in the eye.

"You're just being cruel! I see how it is, you're relishing the idea of getting back at me aren't you! You never forgave me for leaving you for a woman." She was indignant and practically screaming at him.

"Maureen stop." Mark's voice firm "that's not what this is about and you know it. Stop screaming before you wake up Roge.."

She cut him off and started to wail again "Fuck Roger!"

"and Mimi." Mark said through gritted teeth "You're gonna wake up Roger AND Mimi" He emphasized the and to her hoping she would quiet down a little.

"It's always about Roger. What about me? I swear you care more about him than you ever did about me" Her voice more pouty now than angry

"You know that's not true, he's my best friend. Besides someone has to look out for him, though that's besides the point. Can we not talk about Roger right now?" He was offended by the statement, which is exactly what she wanted. He sat silently for a minute, before looking at her again. "What do you want me to say to Joanne. I don't understand why you think I can be of any help, but I'll try." He said with a defeated sigh. Once again he had resigned himself to Maureen's every whim. Just like he always does.

Maureen threw her arms around his neck and kissed his cheek. "You're the best! I knew you loved me." her tone had done a complete 180 in a matter of seconds. With that she stood up and bounced out of the room.

"Maureen, what am I supposed to say to her?" Mark called to the back of her head

"Oh Marky, you're good with people. You'll figure something out." and she was gone.

Mark sat on the floor of Maureen and Joanne's room lost in the aftermath of another Maureen storm, trying to catch his breath. She had left her suitcase on the bed and clothing strewn all over the place in her typical fashion. Nothing about her had ever been orderly, it was part of her charm. She had this sexy, wild, out going personality and she couldn't be bothered with structure even when it came to putting her clothes away. Seeing her room like this gave Mark a familiar ache in his heart reminding him that he still missed having her in his daily life, no matter how chaotic she made it.

"Whatcha thinkin about?" Maureen asked practically touching her nose to his nose.

He hadn't heard her come back in and was startled back to reality "huh?"he stared at her still in a slight daze "What?"

"Whatcha thinkin about?"she repeated

"Nothin, why?"

"You were thinking about something. You had to be, cuz you were grinning." she peered at him eyes wide and sparkling.

Marks face started to burn red, he could feel it. "It's nothing, just an idea for a screenplay."

"Starring Me?" She bit her lower lip, smiling causing her eyes to dance and his heart to lurch in his chest.

"Yeah something like that." anything to appease her, just so long as she stopped asking.. "Look you better keep packing." She looked at him and tears started to well in her green eyes again. "Just is case. I'll still talk to Joanne, but it's better if it looks like you don't know about it."

Her eyes turned down and she was suddenly looking at the floor "I guess you're right Marky"

He took this as his chance to escape, so he got up and headed for the door.

"Marky?"

"Yeah." He stopped and turned to her, noticing how innocent and childlike she suddenly looked.

"Thank you." she almost whispered the words.

"You're welcome." his tone matching hers. Then he was gone, unable to watch her any longer. He knew that if he didn't walk away right then he would say something he would regret.