Disclaimer: I don't own anything here, just an idea, but trust me you can't get anything from that! Leave me to live in fiction

Summary: Donna starts working for the White house as the Press secretary. She had no idea that her first statement will have to be about her getting a job without proper education. She tells them a story. And Josh watches…lousy summary, just give it a chance.

Thanks to:

Kursk – The questioning is over; however there are still a few questions that need to be answered. But, their encounter is pretty close.:)Thanks!

KristyP – I'm glad you liked the last chapter. I think that Josh's change in behavior really can be placed behind the fact he lost a part of his life in Donna. I hope you'll like one too. I wanted to find someone in the White house, besides Toby and CJ with who she could talk to. Of course, we can't expect from her to admit everything yet...:)Hope to hear from you again!

Miss jasadin – It's good that you're never happy.:) That way, you can make good reviews. Anyway, Matt was really there to play his politician role, while Helen got to see things from her woman's point of view. And Ronna will have a few more things to say.:)

Mhcrose311 – Thanks a lot! I share your opinion. It is sad how some things that are right turn upside down. However, I'm making myself a goal to change that here. Not just yet, anyway...:)Hope to hear from you!

Simanis – Thanks! Don't worry, I plan to revive their friendship, maybe a little easier on the friends part.:) And Leo comes in the next chapter again!

Lu78 – I have big plans with Helen in this story. Especially, for my next chapter, when the story is moving to Santos's headquarters again. See, how I'm trying to do the same thing as in the real WW :) Hope to hear from you again.

Chapter 5 – Blood and tears

White house

Donna slowly exited the room feeling like a giant weight has been lifted from her shoulders. She actually did it!

"OK, Donnatella, just calm down, walk out that door. Don't let them see you're going to do a victory dance as soon as you're on the other side." – her thoughts were dancing, but she had a tough time keeping the smile of her face.

Toby walked right behind her. And although he was still surprised, he couldn't help but chuckle as he realized Donna picked up the same strut that Josh had when he did good. Still, it was a long way from yelling through the hallways that "she's da man".

As the doors closed behind them, she turned around and hugged him.

"I did it! Did you see that? I was good!"

Toby shared her smile, grabbing the folder from her, as she started to dance.

"I saw. It was…quite something. Congratulations."

She stopped her dance only to look at him. She would've thought he will be more enthusiastic. At least as much is possible for Toby.

"You don't look pleased?"

"No, no, I am. You did great. Did you think of the ramifications of your little statement?" Her smile disappeared.

"Such as?" – she asked placing the hands on her hips. Toby was trying to tell her something, and she wanted to know exactly what that is. He was ruining her fun.

"Well, although I'm surprised there were no more questions in there regarding…well that subject" – there was no way in hell that he will repeat her "sleeping-her-way-to-this-position" part. – "but there were no members of the yellow press there. These are serious people, well, at least most of the time, and they let this go. It doesn't mean, some tabloid won't pick this up."

"You really think they won't let this go?"

"I really don't know…" – Toby started but C.J. approached them.

"Donna, nice save! Although that sleeping part was maybe redundant, but you did really well."

Donna smiled to her friend. Although it didn't look sincere like it was a few minutes back. It meant a lot to her that C.J. was complementing her. She was a big role model for her, and a good friend.

"So, you don't think some tabloid will hunt this?" – she wanted to hear her opinion.

C.J. realized that she came in the middle of an argument. She looked from Donna to Toby.

"I don't think so. Toby?"

"I just said that they could pick it up. Josh is still running Santos's campaign, and education is their main thing."

Realization just hit her.

"Oh, my God, you don't think that I hurt Josh's campaign in any way?" – she looked panicked.

Toby and C.J. shared a look.

"It's Santos's campaign and, no, I don't think anyone was hurt here." – C.J. replied emphasizing the word Santos.

Her cheeks turned into light shade of red as she saw C.J. giving her the look. Almost the same look she gave her before her trip to Gaza. The judging look.

"Yes, Santos's campaign. That's what I meant." – she muttered and quickly continued. – "So, you think there will be no consequences?"

C.J. shook hear head and started walking toward her office with Toby and Donna in tow.

"I think everything will be fine. Just call someone at Santos's headquarters and check with them. Maybe they will get some questions. So, try to agree on the same answer. This doesn't actually ease things on them." – he purposely didn't want to mention Josh as a contact.

"Yeah, I'll do that."

Donna nodded to both of them and went to her office.

"And I was just doing my victory dance…" – she muttered in her chin while Carol was watching her from her desk. She closed the doors behind her and leaned on the door. Her look fell on the phone.

"Well, better now than later."

Donna opened her doors and stuck her head out.

"Carol, can you call me someone from Santos's campaign?"

Carol looked at her carefully, smiling a little, trying to see if there was a secret meaning to that request.

"Someone as in…?" – she didn't want to say Josh. There were a lot of people there, and they were all casting glances at Donna.

"Someone, as in someone, who can talk to me about a few press issues now." – she wanted to get inside her office where she wasn't exposed to castaway glances from the staff.

"So, I shouldn't call…" – Carol yelled before she managed to get inside.

"No, no, no!" – she came out waving her hands – "Just someone in charge for the press releases there." – she quickly added and entered her office. She sat behind her desk and hit her head on the desk.

"This is becoming an unbearable day." – she muttered as the back of her head hit the chair. She was trying to remember every part of the statement she made. It wasn't a plan, the words just kept flowing from her mouth.

"That was good." – she thought. – "mentioning the fact just how long I've been working here and under what circumstances. I mean, you can't survive in this place if you're not a hard worker. I got the chance and I worked hard, earned my way to this place."

She still felt like something was wrong. She couldn't name it, but something was in the back of her mind.

"Carol?" – Donna pressed the intercom button. – "How's that call coming?"

"I can't get through. All I get is a busy signal. I'm still trying. Don't worry. I'll let you know as soon as I get someone."

Donna smiled a little. Never, in a million years would she thought she will have an assistant. She knew she earned it, but she also felt all those stares in the whole ways.

"Actually, I want to talk to you about something. Can you come in here?"

There was a small silence before Carol entered the room.

"Is everything OK?" – Carol asked sympathetically.

"Donna motioned her to sit down.

"Yeah, everything is fine. I just want to ask you something. Do you think I'm not entitled to this job?"
Carol was struck aback from this question.

"God, Donna, why would you think that? Did I do anything to…?"

"No, no, no, it's just…well, you graduated – I didn't. Considering that, you have a right to have an objection ."
Carol was quiet for a second as she watched her friend struggle with words. They knew each other a long time, and she felt like she can speak her opinion like she could before.

"Donna, is this about Josh?"

Donna felt like someone hit her in the stomach.

"Why do you ask that?"

"Well, you did mention him in the Press room. Great job, by the way. But, you know, you never needed to go back that far. Your credentials maybe started with Josh Lyman, but you already proved that you're worthy. Why do you still question your abilities?

Donna looked down and started playing with her notes. It was like everyone had an opinion about Josh and her. And she hated that. Why couldn't she just live her life without being connected to him? Why couldn't she break that connection? God knows she tried.

"You don't understand. He's my…"

"He's your what?" – Carol knew she had no right to question he boss like that. But it looked to her, that Donna was finally ready to name some things in her life with their real names. And not hide behind titles.

Donna laughed bitterly.

"He's my nothing. You know what, I keep forgetting the fact that we're not friends anymore." – her eyes began to tear.

"I think you're wrong on that. He let you go."

Donna looked at her friends eyes, not caring that they looked like pools filled with water.

"I left."

Carol sadly nodded.

"Yeah, but I'm not talking about that. He got the chance to get you back as his deputy, and he refused. Remember what you once told me; how Charlie had to make a promise to the President that he will quit when he finishes school? Well, as much as it killed him probably, he did exactly that. He let you go. And only a true friend would do that. It's up to you to decide what you'll do with that freedom."

A small tear fell from Donna's eyes. She couldn't force herself to think that that was the case, because her true feelings would come through again. And she tried to bury them as deep as possible.

"I think you're wrong. He couldn't hire me, because of all the things I said during the campaign. He even had a folder of all my "famous" quotes." – she stopped looking directly into Carol's eyes. – "How do you know I went there?"

Carol smiled to her standing up.

"I didn't. You just told me."

Donna couldn't force herself to speak, afraid her voice will betray her. As she was about to leave, Carol turned one more time.

"You can't run from your life, Donna. And Josh is apart of yours. No matter if you'll willing to admit that or not. You shed blood and tears together. You can't erase that." – she gave her friend a reassuring smile. – "I'm gonna try to make that call for you."

Another tear fell from Donna's eyes as the door behind Carol closed. She wasn't crying, she was Donna at last. But, her eyes found a spot on her wall and she stared at it, playing with her necklace. She did that when she was worried and sad…

AN – Well, I hope you liked it! Next: more of Helen's thoughts. She will get her hands on those Inauguration tapes Leo watched once when he came back to the White house after his heart attack.. And she has a few questions on her own.