Title: Their Love, Her Murder

Disclaimer: Slash. Violence. Angst. Language. Character death.

POV: Danny

Chapter Seventeen: Falling Forever

The sun washes the sky with its light. The gentle breeze runs over my skin. Clouds chase each other across the blue ocean of the sky. I sit on the flat surface of the roof. Even up here the city is noisy. My thoughts remain uninterrupted. As a small mouse runs for cover in some little nook or cranny I think about the others. What are they doing right now? Do they notice that I'm missing?

Lindsay and Hawkes are probably really busy with their case work. I know how that is. So they won't notice the fact that I'm missing. Mac is most likely furious that I am not at work. He did tell me that I was close to losing my job. That's okay; I have plans of my own. I won't need my job after today. None of the lab assistants will notice my being gone. They take little notice of anything but their work.

Stella. Ha, who cares if Stella notices? I wish I could understand what happened to her. We had been friends, albeit not good friends. Still, one would think she'd be nicer to me. All of a sudden, though, it's fire and brimstone. How did I piss her off? Was it something I said? Something I did? Or is just because I love Flack and she's not happy with that? I know that not all people accept that kind of love. Why not? Why can't I love him and be happy? Why does the world frown upon me? Am I not allowed the same happiness as every other person?

I sigh. The answer to that question is well known. Of course I'm not allowed to be happy like everyone else. The panic from last night tries to get a hold of me again. I don't Stella telling everyone about me. Flack will lose his job. I just know he will. Yes, he can sue them over it. But things will never be the same. We both stand to lose so much. I can't do that to him. He doesn't deserve to have his life ruined because of my stupidity.

I spent last night sleeping beside him. Just sleeping and nothing more. The comfort he brings is always welcome. While he was in the shower this morning I wrote him a note and left it in his wallet. My plan is for him to find it around lunch time. Then he'll know everything there is to know. It'll be too late but he'll know.

From my pocket I pull a photo. The photo is almost identical to the one on my fridge. It's at the same party. Instead of Aiden and me under the mistletoe though; it's Aiden, Flack, and I hanging out with Santa. The smiles we are all wearing seem so fake, so phony. I feel the tears as they leave their marks on my cheeks. How quickly life can change. It takes us all by shock. Things never return to the way they once were and we're left to cope, to adapt. Neither of which I am doing very well.

The next thing I pull from my pocket is the bottle of medicine. Almost empty now. I shake it and listen to the contents rattle around. Then in frustration I chuck it across the roof. It clatters somewhere off in the distance. I don't need it anymore. I'll never need it again. My head doesn't hurt anymore. Nothing hurts. It's all numb. I'm numb.

I hold my head in my hands while I cry. Everything that has happened is finally being released. Crying doesn't seem like enough. Not anymore. Tears can keep coming. They can't right the wrongs in my life. They can't make me feel better. Happy. I'll never feel like myself again. I'm lost inside this shell of humanity.

I stand, taking charge of my life. The words scrawled on a white piece of paper flash back in my mind. The note I left Flack. I close my eyes and let it all come back to me. Just one last time. One last thought of him.

Flack, where do I begin? How do I put into words what I feel? With you, my life should be completely. I have your love. It's the only thing I have wanted for so long. I can't even imagine expressing to you the joy I felt when I found out those feelings were shared and not just some dream. I'd hold you close forever. If I had the time. But I feel as though I'm losing control. Right now you're probably sitting at some restaurant getting ready to pay for your lunch, my note having caught your eye. I can see you reading this with a questioning look, trying to figure out what I'm going to say. What's the punch line, Danny? Right? It's coming. It's been coming for a while now. Remember back for me. Remember to that case with the druggy girl. The one who jumped from the building because she was high. I understand her now. It wasn't the drugs. It was the thought of flying. Of being free of this world. Of growing wings and soaring above all the pain and hatred flowing through the veins of the world. I really understand her now. I truly do. It all seems so right. I love you and always will. I'll be falling for you for eternity. I want to be free. My head doesn't hurt anymore…

Too cryptic? No, he'll figure it out. He's a good detective. By the time he gets to his lunch it'll be done. It'll be all over the news and he'll know. Whether or not he finds my note. I open my eyes. Like I wrote, I want to be free. It's time for me to be free. To rid my soul of the torment it's been holding on to. There's no need for it to be there. I walk the short distance. It's an interesting feeling, looking down on the world.

A door behind me slams shut. Footsteps on the roof. Too late.

"Danny?"

I'm not going to answer you Flack. You shouldn't be here. I smile softly. Guess he got my note a little earlier than expected. No problem. Things are going to go as planned. My mind is made up. The decision is here.

"Danny? Danny, please answer me." His voice has picked up a slight panic.

Panic, something that left me last night. Everything left me. There is no thought. Just existence. I step up on the little ledge. The cars crawl along the street in their usual fashion. People rush about like little ants in a giant world. They try to pretend that everything is okay. Fools. All of them are fools.

"Danny!" Flack sees me. I'm sorry, Flack. I really am. It's too late.

I open my arms and slowly lean forward. It's just too late for me…

Fin.