November rolled on and the weather grew increasingly dreary. It had turned out to be a very cold and wet fall. Everyone was starting to get cabin fever and tempers were running short.
Severus noticed that Athena was continuing to avoid Lupin. Even though Lupin put on a good face in public, Severus could see the pain and suffering when they were in the staff room. He took secret pleasure in being the source of his colleague's suffering.
What he hated most about this time of year was that the students were indoors. Normally, the library was his sanctuary, but this time of year, the students congregated there. Groups of girls would giggle and point at groups of boys. How he hated dealing with hormonal teenagers. It was days like this that he began to question his decision to teach. But then he remembered his posting here at Hogwarts was keeping him alive.
While Madam Pince kept the library quiet, there were still too many students there for his liking. Scowl firmly in place he headed for the Potions section. He was looking for a book on folk remedies the library had recently acquired. He had been looking for it for the last two weeks, but it was checked out. Rather than ask Irma, he checked the stacks. No, it still was not back.
He went over to the front desk and stood impatiently tapping his fingers until Irma came over to see what he wanted. "Yes, Professor?" she asked politely.
"Has Ancient Remedies for What Ails You been returned yet?" he asked shortly.
She sighed. It was the same routine nearly every day. He would come in, check the stacks, not find the book and ask her if it had been returned. "Not yet. I told you I would inform you once it was," she replied patiently.
He cast his gaze around the full library and arched an eyebrow at the piles of unshelved books. "I know how…busy it can get this time of the year," he said disapprovingly.
"This library has never been anything other than organized. And I assure you that as soon as that book is returned, I will notify you." If only to keep you off my back, she added silently.
Someone deposited a pile of books next to them. "Here you are, Irma. Sorry to have monopolized them for so long," apologized Athena.
Snape's gaze shifted to the pile of books. On top was the book he was looking for. He glanced at the rest of the titles and saw that almost all had something to do with Potions. He snatched the book of the top of the pile. "I trust I can take this book, now?" he asked Irma.
She waved that he was welcome to take it. She was glad to have one of them out of her hair.
"Has the copy of Uncommon Uses of European Magical Mushrooms been returned yet?" asked Athena.
"Not yet. Why is it none of you believe me when I tell you that I will let you know when a book is returned?" She shot a glance at Severus' retreating back.
"I'm sorry. I only asked because I was here," Athena said apologetically.
"Oh, I didn't mean to snip at you over that. It's just that he's been in here every day for the last two weeks asking me about that book."
"Oh, if I'd realized it was that important I would have brought it back sooner," she said apologetically.
"Between you and Miss Granger it's a wonder we have books for everyone else to check out."
"I know. I'm sorry. I'm trying to go through some of the books that we don't have back at Reese. When you ask for a book, I'll try to be a little more timely in returning it."
"Please do. It help keeps the peace." Irma shook her head as she watched Athena head into the Restricted Section, no doubt in search of more books. Everyone around here seemed to think they were entitled to get any book the instant they wanted it and keep it as long as they wanted.
Remus had to talk to her. It had been nearly a month since she had found out what he was. He wanted to try once again to convince her that he had never meant to hurt her. He found her alone in the staff room one afternoon. "Athena, may I please speak with you?" he asked.
She put down the papers she was grading. "Haven't you got the message yet? It's over."
"Is it really? Can you be that cavalier about your feelings? The ones where you talk about the spark between us?"
She stood as she finished collecting her papers. "It's amazing what will put that spark out. I assure you, it is gone." She brushed past him on her way out.
"Is it because of what I am?" he asked.
She stopped and turned back to face him. "No. It's because you didn't trust me enough to tell me. Because you thought I would shun you if I knew. And you know what? I don't think I would have." She walked away from him. That last part might have been a lie, she didn't know. All she knew was that she wanted him to hurt as much as she did.
As November turned into December, the rain turned into snow. After what seemed like an eternity, there was finally a break in the weather. Severus decided to take advantage of the lack of precipitation, liquid or frozen, to go to Hogsmeade to restock his supplies. During the inclement weather he had been conducting a great deal of research and many of his private stores were running low. He didn't mind the cold; it let you know you were alive. Besides, he lived in the dungeons and was quite used to the cold.
Athena was returning to the castle after a walk in the woods. The Dryads had been pleased to see her and she had spent the morning with them, frolicking in the snow and telling stories. She was enjoying the crisp, clean smell of the air as she walked back to the castle. It surprised her that none of the students were about. As she neared the main doors, she saw another brave denizen taking a walk. From the height and the black clothing it could only be Severus.
She smiled slyly as she had an evil idea. He hadn't seen her yet, so she hid behind the dead shrubbery, her white cloak helping her blend in with the winter scenery. Hopefully he wouldn't look her way when he walked by, the shrubbery wasn't thick enough to completely conceal her.
He walked right past without looking her, trademark scowl on his face. How she longed to see him smile. Perhaps a little prank would break through that icy façade. She quickly packed a snowball and snuck down the path after him. Fortunately, he wasn't walking very quickly, so she was soon within range. Taking aim, she let the snowball fly and hit him squarely in the back of his head.
Severus spun around and growled, "Detention and fifty points from the house of whoever threw that snowball." He looked around searching for a student, but only saw Athena. "Did you see who threw that?"
She tried very hard to maintain a straight face. His eyes were full of rage. "Yes," she replied. She covered her mouth trying to conceal the laughter.
He stormed up to her and pointed an accusatory finger at her. "You threw that snowball?"
"I cannot tell a lie," she replied glibly, only after the fact aware that the humor of this statement would probably be lost on him.
That happy smile of hers incensed him even more. "Would you mind telling me why?" he asked through clenched teeth.
Athena tried to compose herself because she could tell he most definitely wasn't taking this as the joke she had intended. "In the three months that I have been here, I have never seen you smile. You always have that scowl on your face. I thought that perhaps this little bit of levity might make you smile."
"You thought that a childish prank like this would make me smile?" He was incredulous at her audacity.
"Yes, it was childish. I thought perhaps it might release that inner child in you. That maybe you would launch a snowball back at me." She was trying hard not to let him intimidate her.
"I would never engage in such childish behavior," he snarled as he crossed his arms defensively.
"Pity. Snowball fights are enormous fun, especially the spontaneous ones." She did her best to give him a disarming smile.
He spun away from her and continued down the path towards Hogsmeade.
This was not turning out at all like she had hoped.
"Severus, wait," she called out and jogged after him. He didn't stop or slow down as she caught up to him. In fact, he didn't acknowledge her presence. "Severus, I'm sorry. I thought it would be a fun little prank." She half jogged to keep up with his long strides. "I was trying to get your attention, you hardly speak to me."
"There are better ways to get my attention than throwing something at me," he growled.
"And what might that be? I try to talk to you in the staff room, and you give me curt one-word answers before excusing yourself. You hardly speak at meals. To top it off, you disappear on weekends. I'd almost think you are avoiding me."
"I am not avoiding you. I am merely not seeking out your company."
"Why not?" she asked.
"What?" He was startled by this question.
"Why not? Other than Remus, I'm the only one here close to your age. And you seem to like him less than you like me. We share some of the same interests, but you wouldn't know that because you haven't spoken to me."
"And how would you know that we have anything in common?" What could he possibly have in common with someone who taught Muggle Studies?
"Well, for one, I have expressed an interest in potions. I have tried to speak to you several times on that subject, to no avail. I assumed that since you teach Potions you would be interested in the subject. Albus has told me that you are one of the most skilled potions makers that he has ever met. You don't know this because you won't talk to me, but I'm something of an apprentice to our Potions Master. I hope to one day take his place. Second, we share a similar taste in literature." She saw him arch an eyebrow at her. "I've seen you reading in the staff room. So, what do you have against me? Did I do something to offend you?"
"I have a question for you, do you hit all your friends with snowballs?" He admitted that she had at least shown an interest in potions after seeing the stack of books she had returned to the library. Of course, that did not mean that she understood the contents of those books.
She paused before answering, gripping her wand tight as they passed by the dementors at the gate. Once they were away from the black creatures she replied, "As a matter of fact, yes, I do. I have been known to start snowball fights on multiple occasions."
He arched his eyebrow again. "You have?"
"Yes. Our staff is a bit younger and larger than yours. We've found it's great stress relief." She noticed he was giving her a very disapproving look. "Oh, come on. You can't tell me there's anything wrong with a friendly snowball fight. Yes, I'll admit it's childish, but still quite liberating." She noticed they had reached the village. "Would you like to continue this discussion over tea or something stronger?"
He looked suspiciously at her.
"Well, you are talking to me, sort of. I thought we could keep talking. That is if you didn't have pressing business." She felt a little embarrassed since he didn't seem to react well to the prospect of voluntarily spending time with her. Of course, the last time she had tried to form a friendship with one of her colleagues it had not turned out like she expected and she had to admit that she didn't know very much about Severus. What if he turned out to be something worse than a werewolf? When he didn't answer she said, "Well then, I'll see you back at the castle." She turned to leave.
"Wait." He didn't know why he spoke. She had given him the perfect exit, but a part of him wanted to know more about a person that thought adults having a snowball fight was acceptable. "We could go to the Three Broomsticks and have a drink."
She turned back and smiled at him. "Thank you. I'd like that."
After a half hour, Severus had to admit that she did know something about potions. He also had to admit that her company wasn't that bad. She hadn't giggled girlishly once. When she finished telling him an amusing story about a potions experiment gone wrong, he said, "You know, you aren't bad company."
"Well, I suppose I can say the same thing about you," she replied smugly. "You know, there are better ways you could have said that," she added sarcastically.
He waved her comment off. Social niceties weren't one of his strong points. "What possessed someone with your intelligence to teach Muggle Studies? Are you Muggle-born?"
She shook her head and drained off the last of her hot-buttered rum. "No. I come from a wizarding family. I actually teach History at Reese, but I wasn't about to pass up the opportunity for an exchange trip after our Muggle Studies professor said he didn't want to travel, but would like to take a year-long sabbatical if someone would accept the exchange. The credentials of the teaching staff here made my decision to give Muggle Studies a try easier," especially yours, she added silently. "Thankfully, Father used to take us on vacation to Muggle cities. I figured I knew enough to teach the class, Albus agreed, so, here I am."
They stared at each for a few seconds in silence.
"Are we on speaking terms, now?" she asked.
He had to admit they were having a rather pleasant conversation. "Yes, I think I can say that we are. Would you like another?" he asked and waved the waitress after Athena nodded her head.
She considered him over the rim of her new glass. "You know, it occurs to me that I've been telling you an awful lot about myself, but you haven't really told me anything about you."
"There's not much to say. I've taught at Hogwarts most of my adult life. You already know how seriously I take potions. I like to read when I'm not working on an experiment. That's pretty much it."
"That's it?" she asked incredulously. "You've summed up your life into a handful of sentences?"
"I'm a simple man."
"Obviously. Do you travel during the break or the weekends? Maybe to visit a girlfriend?" She sat on the edge of her seat trying not to look anxious.
"No. There is no girlfriend. I tend to sequester myself in my rooms over the weekend, a respite from the rigors of teaching. I do travel over the breaks. Mostly looking for new herbs and collecting old folk remedies."
Excellent, there was no girlfriend, not that she had really suspected he had one. While not the most handsome of men, he wasn't hard on the eyes and seemed to have an interesting personality. She would have to keep him talking to determine that for certain. "Sounds fascinating. I bet you've been a lot of interesting places."
She seemed genuinely interested in his travels. It was very rare that anyone was interested in what he had to say. "I suppose you could call some of them interesting. Mostly they are dirty."
They continued to talk for the better part of the next two hours. Athena looked at her watch. "Goodness, look at the time. It's nearly suppertime. Did you want to head back to the castle or should we eat here?"
"I think we'll head back to the castle. It is getting dark and I don't have a particular desire to deal with the dementors." He also wasn't ready to commit to something as formal as a dinner. She threw a few sickles on the table before he could call for the check. Rather than start an argument, he added his money to hers and paid the check.
They hurried to the Hogwarts gate as the dementors were already closing in around the village. Both of them could feel the slight hint of despair that accompanied a dementor as one approached.
Once on school grounds, they slowed their pace. "If you are still interested, we can find a time when we can get together and begin your potions tutoring," he offered.
She smiled at him. "I'd like that." She wanted to ask him why he had told her about Remus, but she decided this probably was not the best time for that. She didn't need to drive another man away. "Can I ask you a question?"
"You still have more questions?" he asked dryly.
She gave him a sidelong glance and decided to launch into her question anyway. "Why are you so bitter?" She watched him arch his eyebrow. "You aren't exactly the most personable of people. I mean, you could have decided to start talking to me ages ago."
"Well, as I recall, after your arrival you spent most of your time with Lupin. And after that, you spent a great deal of time moping in your quarters."
"Hey, I wasn't moping," she said defensively.
He arched his eyebrow. "Oh really? And what would you call it?"
"Okay, maybe I was moping. Point taken. So I guess you aren't totally to blame."
"You always could have been more aggressive about talking to me."
"Okay, okay, I get the point. You made me nervous. You tend to do that to everyone. Oh, don't deny it. I hear how the students talk about you," she prodded playfully.
"They have no respect for their elders," he sneered, recalling the boggart incident.
His reaction was exactly what she expected and it made her smile. "They don't understand you. And don't worry, neither do I." She looked up and saw they were nearly at the castle. "How about tomorrow afternoon for my potions lesson?"
Severus suddenly remembered that he had gone into town to buy supplies, but had completely forgotten about it once he started talking to Athena. "Normally that would be acceptable, except I have to go into the village and buy supplies."
"I'm sorry I sidetracked you," she apologized.
Surprisingly he wasn't angry with her over this. "Fortunately, it wasn't necessary for me to make my purchases today. How about after dinner tomorrow? In my office?"
She smiled warmly and replied, "Sounds good. I'll meet you there."
Severus watched her walk up the stairs toward her quarters. Perhaps she wasn't as bad as he had thought.
Remus noticed that in the period preceding Christmas break Severus and Athena were spending a lot of time huddled over books of some variety. The only thing that made him feel better was that it seemed to be professional. He looked up as Athena screamed out in frustration. Good, Snape was driving her as crazy as he did everyone else. He still couldn't imagine her voluntarily spending time with Snape.
"How can that be? You just finished telling me that dragon's blood is only used in poisons. Now you are telling me something else?"
"There are always exceptions," Severus replied.
"Then don't use the word 'only'. When you say 'only' you mean that there are no other uses. You are a most exasperating person."
"You should be a more attentive student. I most certainly did not say 'only'," he said defensively.
"Ahhhh. I'm going to take a break." She tossed her quill on the table and walked out of the staff room.
Remus watched Snape put aside the book they had been studying and pick up a different one. Remus decided this might be the best chance that he had to finally talk to her. He had recently noticed that she had been spending a considerable amount of time in the Forest. When he had followed her to see why, he had observed her meeting with Dryads. Since Dryads didn't care much for human women, he had deduced that she was part nymph. That would explain his reaction to her. It had been her fault. She had used her powers to seduce him. As long as she didn't return to her quarters he would be able to confront her about her deception. Since she had grabbed her cloak on the way out, he should be able to force her to confess tonight.
He hurried to catch up to her and was surprised when she didn't head for the Entrance Hall and her precious Forest. Instead, she was heading towards the Astronomy Tower. He followed along at a discrete distance. It wouldn't do for her to catch him following her. He peered out the door and saw her just looking across the grounds. Yes, this was perfect. There was nowhere for her to run.
After watching her for a few minutes, he decided to approach her. "Oh, Athena, I hadn't expected anyone else to be here," he feigned surprise.
"The grounds are lovely from up here," she replied, lost in the moment and forgetting she was mad at him.
"It's quite beautiful with the blanket of snow. It's a shame that it isn't fresh snow. The unblemished snowscape is one of the few truly beautiful things in the world." He moved closer to stand next to her. "As are you," he added softly. He brushed the hair away from the side of her face and softly kissed her cheek. When she didn't object, he kissed her again and turned her head so that he could kiss her lips.
He laced his fingers through her hair and pulled her closer for a passionate kiss.
For a few moments she returned the kiss, succumbing to her weakness. Then she realized who she was with and pulled away. "Oh, why did you have to come up here? Why couldn't you have left me in peace?" she groaned.
Quite uncharacteristically, he lied, "I didn't know you were up here. You aren't the only one that enjoys the view from here. I'm sorry to disturb you, but since I'm here, I thought you might want to talk about the problems you are having with Severus. Forgive me, but that was quite theatrical in the staff room just now."
She laughed softly. He was his usual charming self. There was something about him that made her feel completely at ease. "It was, wasn't it? He can be quite exasperating. I think I'm more tired than anything. He's quite knowledgeable and I'm convinced he thinks I know more than I do."
He found her laugher musical. How he had missed her. He couldn't wait to have her in his arms again. "So you're just studying potions with him?" he asked.
"Yes. It's an excellent opportunity for me. While our Potions Master is good, he is nowhere near as knowledgeable as Severus."
"That's one thing Severus has always excelled at." He could smell her perfume and found it intoxicating.
She pulled her cloak closer around her, growing uncomfortable in his presence. "I think I'll go in now."
He grabbed her arm, but not too hard. "Please, stay. We're finally talking."
She tried to shake loose from his grip. "Remus, let go."
He placed himself between her and the door before letting go of her arm. He pleaded desperately, "You don't know what it's like to be a werewolf. I am universally reviled for something beyond my control." She was backing away from him and he continued to close on her. "I have been denied everything. This is the first decent job I have held my entire life. No one wants to hire a werewolf, be friends with a werewolf, or even admit to knowing a werewolf." His voice was barely a whisper, but full of determination.
"Remus, stop," she pleaded. He had backed her up to the battlement.
There was a determined glint in his eye as he reached out to touch her cheek. "You teased me. Let me enjoy genuine friendship, female companionship. But now, I wonder, was it all a lie?" He grabbed her wrist before she could reach her wand. "Now, now, we can't have any of that," he chided.
She tried to get away, but he had her trapped. "Remus, let me go," she ordered.
"Not until we've talked. I find it very interesting that you are mad at me for keeping a secret from you," he stroked her cheek with his right thumb, "when you had a secret of your own."
"What are you talking about?" she asked nervously. He couldn't know. She had been careful to ensure that no one saw her going into the woods. Besides, it was nearly impossible to sneak up on Dryads. They were one with the woods.
He laughed softly. "Oh, you know what I'm talking about. Your little secret that you are Dryad." His voice lowered to a near growl. "I did not stand a chance against you. Dryads can attract any man they want." He laughed maniacally before continuing. "You knew exactly what you were doing in the restaurant, even set the stage for my seduction and you never told me what you were. And yet you're are mad at me for keeping secrets? What ever happened to a fun, school year romance? But I guess you were telling me what I wanted to hear, weren't you?"
He was starting to scare her. She had never expected him to react like this. "Remus, please, I can…"
He pushed her against the battlement. "What, you can explain? How very hypocritical. Give me one good reason why I should listen to your explanation." He waited as she opened her mouth a couple of times to say something, but she made no sound. "That's what I thought."
She could feel a tear running down her cheek. She knew that not telling him had been wrong, but it had never mattered before. "You're wrong. I didn't seduce you. And I'm only part Dryad. Not enough that it matters."
"Oh, no? My behavior around you has not been normal. Just being near you excites me in a way I cannot explain. You free me of my inhibitions. And there can be only one reason for that. You may think it doesn't matter, but I assure you, you do have an effect on me."
She tried to shove him away. "Remus, please. It's over."
"You can't do this to me. You can't just throw me away. We are the same. We both harbor dark secrets that no one can know. Besides, you know you want me. You cannot lie to me after that kiss," he said in a reassuring voice.
He was standing so close that she could feel the heat radiating off his body. His desire was so strong she thought she could almost smell it. The passion in his eyes entranced her and she could feel her heart jump into her throat as he closed the very small distance between them and brushed his lips against hers. That light touch fanned the flames and she returned the kiss, pulling him against her. She reveled in the passionate kiss.
His hands were under her cloak, searching through the folds of the many layers of clothes for her soft skin. It pleased him that she was touching him as well. She was undoing his buttons, doing the same thing he was, looking for that intimate touch.
Reluctantly she pulled away. "No. No, I can't."
"You can't what?" He was confused. One minute she was all over him, the next she was pushing him away.
"I can't be with you. Not with the way I feel."
He was tired of her games, because that's all they were. He had thought of nothing but having another night with her. "The way you feel? What's wrong with the way you feel? I arouse you and you arouse me. Isn't that what you wanted? A fun fling? Or is it the way you feel about someone else?" he asked referring to Severus. "Severus is not right for you. He is cold and uncaring. Just tell me what you want. I love you, Athena." He pulled her tight so she could feel how aroused he was. He had to have her. His life was incomplete without her. She had shown him what it was like to be loved by a woman. He had let Lily get away, never having told her how he felt. He wasn't about to repeat that mistake. Whatever it took, he would convince Athena to stay with him.
She was on the verge of panic. He was bigger than her and the odds of someone coming up here were just about zero. "Remus, please, you're scaring me." She fought back the tears, trying not to cry. This was why she hadn't told any of them what her grandmother was. She had never affected a man like this. This sort of jealousy was normally something caused only by a full Dryad. His Lycanthropy must be affecting the way he reacted to her. Perhaps he was right that she affected him.
"Don't deny your feelings. You want to be with me." He tried to kiss her again. When she stomped on his foot, he released her and she started falling backwards. He tried to catch her before she fell, but he couldn't get his hands on her. He watched in horror as she plummeted over the battlement. "Athena!" he called out.
She screamed as she fell.
Remus looked over the edge of the battlement as he heard the tone of the scream change. He knew that he could not catch her as Albus had caught Harry during the Quidditch match and could only wait for the sickening thud of flesh hitting ground.