Chapter 39 by Abbot & Natters
Sam's POV
I'm pacing furiously in the square when the Colonel runs up, one minute since we signed off.
"Carter? What's wrong?"
"We have a problem."
I refuse to call you sir, while we have this conversation.
"I got that. You want to enlighten your clueless CO here?" he snaps at me.
I take a deep breath, suddenly understanding that he's feeding off my anger. Okay, in through the nose, out through the mouth.
"You need to calm down."
"I will as soon as you tell me what the hell is going on Major."
Just keep on rubbing it in my face, why don't you, you sonofa-
"There's an added effect of the N'Tinevale. Sir."
"Oh crap."
He takes a deep breath. "It's not that Sparrow thing is it?"
I can't help the smile that breaks through my outwardly calm demeanor and see him grin back.
"Sparel. And no, it's not that. You… uhh… well, you took the appropriate precautions."
He winces and looks down at the floor and I'm filled with a wave of regret. Was that him or me? He's fiddling with his hands, and I feel a swell of deep compassion well up inside of me, definitely mine, as I sense his pain. Charlie.
How did we go from being angry to this in a matter of nanoseconds? How can I suddenly know exactly what he's feeling at his very moment?
"So, if it's not the Spare Wheel, what's the problem Carter?" he jokes to cover up his anguish, but this time it's not working.
"Carter?"
He's begging with those beautiful chocolate eyes now. Pleading with me to tell him what's wrong so he can fix it or adapt.
"I was talking with-"
"Ahh!" he interrupts, more out of habit than anything, I can sense as he looks down again.
"With Olmas about the N'Tinevale. It creates an… empathic link between the… those affected."
"Empathic? That's like ESP right?"
"Essentially yes."
"So… How long does it last?"
"It's permanent."
"Oh for crying out loud!"
His frustration slams into me like a right hook and sends me back a few steps in automatic recoil.
"Carter. I'm sorry. Are you okay?"
Suddenly, the anger has melted away to be replaced by a small amount of fear and remorse.
"I'm fine. It just caught me a little off guard."
"I don't suppose distance helps?"
"Not really. It's one reason why I've felt like hell since…"
"Options?"
"We do our best to ignore the side effects for now, until we get home."
"And then what? We get poked and prodded by the Doc and her needles for a couple of days?"
"I don't know. I just want to get off this damn planet ASAP."
"At first light. Speaking of which, we'd better round up the troops and get back to camp."
He reaches for the radio.
"This is O'Neill, everyone return to the square."
"Aye sir," replies Foss.
"Yes Colonel," answers Jones.
"ETA five minutes sir," says Littlefield.
"I shall be there O'Neill," comes the deep, reassuring voice of Teal'c.
A few moments later, he depresses the button impatiently. "Doc? Daniel?" We exchange a worried glance and wordlessly head for the inn at a run. Nobody can get into trouble faster than Daniel. "Change of plan kids. Meet us at the inn in the North quarter."
Jack's POV
"It's not that Sparrow thing is it?"
I hope against hope. I can't give up that slim ray of light that the image of Sam and I starting a family makes.
"Sparel. And no, it's not that. You… uhh… well, you took the appropriate precautions."
I have a sudden image of a boy, with bright blonde hair and brown eyes and glasses, sitting on Sam's lap and being read to. And then, it's gone, dust. I feel like crap, knowing that'll never be. Knowing we, me and Carter, will never be. Suddenly, I feel like she knows and pain, and sympathizes. I could kill for a hug right now, but I guess I'll have to tough it out.
"So, if it's not the Spare Wheel, what's the problem Carter? Carter?"
I'm trying to joke, it's not working. She just looks at me, shifts her weight. Something's wrong. I keep getting these gut instincts when I'm around her. I need to know what it is to fix it, right? Why won't she tell me?
"I was talking with-"
"Ahh!" I cut her off. I don't want the run around, I want brass tacks.
"With Olmas about the N'Tinevale. It creates an… empathic link between the… those affected."
"Empathic? That's like ESP right?"
"Essentially yes."
"So… How long does it last?"
"It's permanent."
Fuck.
"Oh for crying out loud!"
I'm pissed, now. What else? A tattoo? Carter cringes, and I regret it. It might be good, I guess. Maybe it'll help me make up for what I...I've done to her.
"Carter. I'm sorry. Are you okay?"
"I'm fine. It just caught me a little off guard."
She's looking at the ground, and I know it won't. I'm too stupid, clumsy...that and the fact that what I did can never be undone. Never be forgiven.
"I don't suppose distance helps?"
I'm looking for a way to ease it up off her.
"Not really. It's one reason why I've felt like hell since…"
No dice. Great.
"Options?"
"We do our best to ignore the side effects for now, until we get home."
"And then what? We get poked and prodded by the Doc and her needles for a couple of days?"
"I don't know. I just want to get off this damn planet ASAP."
Well, at least she shares that sentiment with me.
"At first light. Speaking of which, we'd better round up the troops and get back to camp."
She nods. She's desperately uncomfortable, I can tell. She doesn't want to be around me, I guess.
"This is O'Neill, everyone return to the square."
A chorus of replies, but no Daniel or Janet. Suddenly, I remember them walking with Keja. Oh. God.
"Doc? Daniel?"
No response. She looks at me, I look at her. I guess her disgust with me is buried in concern for our friends. I guess that's something to be thankful for.
"Change of plan kids. Meet us at the inn in the North quarter."