A/N: Hello!!!!
This is set in the evening after the "lunchtime gone awry", okay? Enjoy!
Oh, the Disclaimer: I do not own anything
Final notes, I suggest you listen to Yellowcard's "Only One". It's the inspiration for this story. No, I'm ordering you, to get the full affect, listen to that song along with this chapter! [Of course, please have access to the song, otherwise, this threat is not meant for you!!! But then I'm not actually threatening, only kidding!]
lyrics by Yellow card, as taken from their song "Only One". I don't own it.
-
Chapter Three: Forever and Always in Letters
Broken this fragile thing now
And I can't, I can't pick up the pieces
And I've thrown my words all around
But I can't, I can't give you a reason
[I] Feel so broken up (so broken up)
And I give up (I give up)
I just want to tell you so you know
Hey, I just wanted to let you know I'm alright, so stop worrying and losing sleep over me. I'm almost to New York City, but I thought that I should send this so you'd know I'm fine.
Ray, I just want you to know I love you, more than anyone else, besides my family, that is. But, I know I'm probably ruining my life doing this. Heck, I know I am. I can't explain why I left, only that I felt I was a burden. And don't try and fight it, I was a burden. I could see it in everybody's eyes, and a few of the recruits wouldn't come near me. I knew leaving was the best thing.
Okay, writing this out I know the problem, the reason. Ray, I had to. He was in my head. I couldn't block out the voices, and having the Prof. and all the other stuff around just made it harder. I didn't want to hurt you, I'm hurting because I know I have. The last thing I want to do is hurt people, and oh god why have I boarded this train? It's too late; the intercom guy just said we were almost there.
I wish you had come, or you came into my room to stop me. Part of me knows this is right, but I'm near dead I'm missing you and Missus O so much.
Samone's waiting for me at the train station. At least I know she'll help me. I'll write again as soon as we get to her apartment, I promise.
Ray, please, I didn't mean to hurt you, or anyone else we knew. I just... I can't explain this. Please, if my folks call, don't let 'em worry. I'm gonna tell 'em when I'm ready.
Oh god, help me. Ray, take care. I love you. I do. I never will stop loving you, even if the years never let us see each other again.
Love, forever and always,
Meg
Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, there's just no one that gets me like you do
You are my only, my only one
Made my mistakes, let you down
And I can't, I can't hold on for too long
Ran my whole life in the ground
And I can't, I can't get up when you're gone
Dear Ray,
Samone's got an amazing apartment, there's room for another person. It isn't the same, it never could be close. But, I got a job, and I've been enrolled into the local college. I miss you so much. I can't put it to words. I hope everyone's moved on. That's all I ask. Please don't dwell on my leaving. I'll right back soon as I can, I'd keep writing but the painters are here. I won't be sleeping in a room with pink walls.
Love, forever and Always,
Meg
Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, there's just no one who gets me like you do
You are my only my only one
Dear Ray,
Hey, sorry it's been so long, almost four months. The reason is because Samone and me moved into another apartment, one closer to her business and to my high school. I got accepted into the Academy of Fine Arts, and I just wanted you to know that I'm still thinking about you. I'm gonna assume everyone's okay, and hopefully you've gotten better. Please Ray, I know you'll dwell on this, but you know I'm going to come back. I will, for you.
Love Forever and Always,
Meg
/Yeah, but you haven't yet.../
Ray went over the letters, again and again, searching for things he knew weren't there. It killed him inside, but he wasn't going to give up. He had those letters, down to the last one he got about two years ago, before Meg stopped writing. It killed him that he didn't know why, which only made his soul want her more. He missed her like waiting for a breath; it was like it wouldn't come at times. Her words fell from the paper to deaf ears; Ray didn't need to hear her voice reading them out.
They were all in a box, often times lost to the upper shelves of the closet, only to be brought down when the time came for them to bee seen and cleared of dust. With each word it brought more doubt...
And something's breaking up (breaking up)
I feel like giving up (like giving up)
I won't walk out until you know...
And as Ray returned the small shoebox to the closet, closed the door, and walked over to the window to gaze at the darkened city, memories flooded his mind...
[A/N: memory in Ray's POV]
"Thanks," she said, looking away from me; "For, ya know, everything..."
Thank God she was still alive, I was afraid she'd bled too much. The cut on her back, from the ceilings coming down on us, it scared the living hell out of me. But when she smiled I was relieved. She would be fine. She always pulled through just about anything, it was her nature. To hear her laugh was assurance enough, but everything mattered to me, down to her heartbeat being normal, which probably wasn't possible since she was a mutant like me.
I smiled though, out of my thoughts and because of how innocent she seemed, how vulnerable she sounded. I brushed the hair from her face, and I said; "Hey, what are boyfriends for? And strong ones at that. Do you know how heavy you get after a few hours? Gosh, it was like carryin' a led weight!"
She laughed again, a weak one but still full of life. It made my whole soul light up; I knew you could have read it on my face. I gazed at her. My sun was shining, I didn't have to wait.
"Meg," I said, not realizing the word had come from my mouth until it was too late. What was I saying? I weighed my thoughts with my emotions, and my heart won out; "I love you."
The three words I spoke left her silent and staring at me, her eyes never leaving me. I felt that feeling, in the back of my head and in my chest, that cold feeling. It was soothing, but I didn't know what it was. It only happened when she looked at me like that. But I ignored it when she opened her mouth to speak.
"Really?" she asked finally, smiling again. At once, that cold feeling left, and I let out the breath I had been holding. "Even when I'm beaten up, bruised, and with no make- up?"
I couldn't help but smile a little; "One," I said, "I couldn't care less what shape you're in. And two, who needs make-up? You don't see guys walking around with it on," I paused; "But yeah, I love you no matter what."
She was silent again, smiling; "Love you too, Ray," she said.
End reverie
[A/N: for more, read Ghost of Mine, Chapter 15, "sweet dreams"]
A single tear managed to free itself from the eye, traveling down the young man's cheek and dripping off to fall to the floor below. Ray leaned against the wall, pondering the consequences of just jumping through the window, taking glass and all out on his way. That memory was what kept him looking, he knew. It was the few words spoken with pure, compassionate honesty that constantly reminded him of what he had to do. He'd lost so many times, and after winning, he wasn't about to let the feeling die.
Even though, on the inside, it was now a small flame next to the embers of emotion that dwelled close to the weakened and beaten heart, the whole "trail by fire" saying a pure sentiment to the situation.
Brrrring, brrrring!
Ray lifted his head and his eyes snapped over to the phone on his nightstand. It rang again, and with a sigh, Ray walked over to answer it. He picked it up, but upon seeing the caller, he quickly answered.
"Yeah?" Ray asked anxiously.
"Mister Crisp?" came the calm reply. It was the detective, David Hofka, the man Ray had hired on the side to help him find Meg; "I think I got a good lead this time."
"Great!" Ray said, opening the drawer and digging for the notepad he kept. He found it, then a pen; "what is it?" he asked, sitting down on the bed.
"Yeah, you told me how your girl was livin' with a 'Samone Edwards'."
"Yeah...!?"
"Calm down!" Hofka chided, "I got her address, you could go there and work from there. Got paper and pen?"
"In my hands, now tell me!"
"Fine, fine! She lives on the edge of Upper Midtown, near the east side."
"Really?" Ray asked, jotting it down in his chicken-scratch writing.
"Yeah, you heard me," Hofka retorted; "Her apartment number is 604, at the building that looks like a brick mansion type. You should be able to find the address, I'm sure you know the area pretty well..."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Ray asked calmly, getting up and walking over to close the blinds to the window. He did, waiting for the reply.
"Nothing, Mister Crisp, Nothing at all;" Hofka paused; "Okay then, well, I found that out, and I thought you should know."
"Expect a check in the paper," Ray said, "Oh, and Hofka..."
"... Yes?"
"I heard a cop from your precinct got hurt, how is he?"
There was a long pause; "Fine," came the curt reply; "He'll be back on the force in about a month."
"Oh, that's good," Ray said, "Well, I gotta go. Bye."
And Ray hung up.
Ray then looked at the clock, seeing it was only six. If he hurried, he could get there before eight, maybe seven thirty. He quickly put back on his shoes, threw on his shirts, and then grabbed his cellphone, wallet, and keys from the dresser. Stuffing said items into his pockets, Ray then left his apartment.
---
Ray got to the elevator, sighing when he saw Max was not on duty. Pulling out his cellphone, he pressed the 3 key, and waited.
"Hello?"
"This is Ray Crisp, I'm requesting that my car be brought up immediately," Ray said, his tone demanding obedience and respect as he exited the elevator and quickly walked through the hallway. The large doors were opened for him by another bellboy as he made his exit, Rays only acknowledgement being a nod.
"Of course, Mister Crisp, it's on it's way as we speak."
"Five seconds," Ray said, and he hung up. Pulling out his keys, he heard the familiar sound of a motor, and then his car came around the corner from the underground garage. The silver 2003 Chevrolet Corvette Z06 came up to the sidewalk, the valet practically jumping out, taking the keys form the ignition before handing them to Ray. Ray took the keys, said a quick thanks, and then got in. With a roar of the imported engine, he was off.
---
Ray navigated the streets, taking the wide alleyways in favor of the crowded streets. He bulleted down abandoned undergrounds, barely avoiding three tickets, and finally skidded to a halt as he found the address. The apartment complex was nice; there were balconies off the walls like hairs on someone's head, and the size of the windows also promoted the buildings fineries. And of course, it looked like a brick mansion.
Ray pulled up to the side, getting out of the car and securing it. He straightened his shirt, ran a hand through his hair, and walked up to the fine doors. He walked in, noting the marble floors and the cream walls. 604, Hofka's voice rang in his head. Ray took to the stairs, and began his assent.
He passed two floors, before finally seeing a door marked with a plaque that read "595". Taking that hallway, he went down, his breath catching in his throat when he saw his destination. Time seemed to slow down more and more the closer Ray got, and when he finally found himself standing outside the door labeled 604, he began to feel like an awkward teen again. Shaking his head and sighing, Ray calmed himself down, and when he had regained the cool as ice and strong as anything façade, the calm but firm look of his face and the faded look of his eyes that represented honesty [yeah... right...], he finally knocked.
"Coming!" a deep, masculine voice called from within.
At once, Ray inwardly sank, but for the sake of first impressions, he kept up the façade. But inside, his head was screaming to just leave.
But he couldn't worry anymore, because the door opened.
A/N: Mwhahaha I'm evil... yep. Review if you want to read more. Oh, Ray kinda forgot about Hofka, so for now, well....=grins impishly= la la la la la la la.... ooh, pretty birdie! =goes off ot chase shadow= Remember to review!!!!!!!!!!!