Icha Icha Crack by Aki

I'm sorry this exists.

I seriously think I was on something when I wrote this.

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In the morning after one night of corny bondage and bad sex, the first thing Hatake Kakashi had to do was to furiously shake Iruka awake. Hey, that rhymes.

"Iruka! IRUKA!" Kakashi literally screamed into the other man's ear until he sprang up, but fell back down onto the bed because he was too sore. In a bad way.

"... What?" Iruka croaked.

"Well..." Kakashi twiddled his thumbs, then suddenly jumped on Iruka and pinned him down to the bed, "WAS I GOOD?"

"Uhh..." Iruka managed to wriggle an arm free to wipe the spit off his face, and then rolled off to the other side of the bed where he was out of Kakashi's reach. He then mumbled something, then pretended to fall asleep, along with loud, fake snorings (1).

Kakashi frowned. Did that mean he sucked in bed?

Kakashi tried to get Iruka to wake up by patting his head and saying his name many, many times. Iruka tried to hold back the tears, for each pat on the head Kakashi was giving him was getting harder and faster.

"Iruka, Iruka, Iruka, Iruka, Iruka-"

"Go away! Iruka is sleeping."

Iruka then went back to faking sleep, which he didn't do a very job on, since he WAS facing Kakashi and his eyes were wide open.

Kakashi's frown deepened. Did he suck that bad?

Later in the afternoon, Kakashi was having his daily morning 6-houred stroll around Konoha, which meant he was going to be late for his training with Team 7, but who cares! He continued happily skipping pass stores while listening to 'I Am Too Sexy' on his iPod Ninja. He skipped and he skipped and- Ooh, wait! An adult bookstore! He immediately flung his iPod Ninja aside, which was snatched away by a very rabid Kakashi fangirl when it left 0.1 mm from his palm.

Kakashi attached himself to the glass window which was separating him and his 2nd love of his life, because Iruka always comes first- Icha Icha Paradise! Not just any Icha Icha, but the one, the only, Icha Icha Lots of Sex Edition!

Kakashi gasped and bought one right away. Then he thought of a plan. A Genius, GENIUS plan. Okay, maybe not that genius.

He was going to sharingan his Icha Ichas.

Yes, every single one of them. That way, Iruka'd never dare say he was bad in bed again!

So he read and sharinganed like a kid rushing through his studies on the day right before his big exam. It was worth it, for he had learnt some new moves, such as 'Doggy Style' and 'The Horizontal Tango'.

In the morning after one heck of a night with kinky bondage and great sex, the first thing Hatake Kakashi had to do was to furiously shake Iruka awake. Now we all know that rhymes.

"Iruka! IRUKA!" Kakashi used one of his Icha Ichas as a voice-enhancer to scream into the other man's ear till he sprang up, but fell back down onto the bed because he was too sore. In a wonderful way.

"... What?" Iruka happily chirped.

"Well..." Kakashi rubbed his hands together, then suddenly jumped on Iruka and pinned him down to the bed, "WAS I GOOD?"

"YES!" Iruka screamed.

And they all lived happily ever after.

Especially Kakashi.

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(1) - Because snorings is sexier than snores.

Nerfertieh, you dog, I can't believe you actually beta'd this. XD